by Thea Thomas
“You’re absolutely right. Thank you, Alex. Thank you so much.”
“You’re completely welcome. Finish your cheesecake and get home. It’s a school night, young lady,” he said in a mocking tone, but sounding uncannily like my dad.
“You sounded just like my dad!”
“One of my many talents.”
I wolfed down the rest of the cheesecake, stood up, gave Alex a hug and hurried out to the car. When I drove into the parking structure, Homer, standing outside, saw me and pointed at me like, “there-you-are-thank-God-you’re-alive-and-are-you-in-trouble!”
So when I flew through the front door I said, “Yes, I’m alive and I know, I’m in deep.”
Chapter XIII
When I walked into the apartment, Mom and Dad were on the sofa, alarm printed on both their face.
“I’m sorry,” I said before either of them spoke.
“Sorry doesn’t cut it, Dominique,” Dad said. “What is going on?”
“So much has happened. Mitch never talked to me. He never answered his phone when I called, or my texts. I went and talked to his mother after school today and she said she hadn’t seen him for days, and didn’t know where he was. And I just kinda freaked out. She said if I was meant to find him I would find him.
“I had an idea where he was and I went there. I mean, I just could’t stop myself, I went there. and he was there....”
I’d spouted all this without a pause, standing in the doorway, the awful feeling crawling up inside me again, the calmness Alex had produced completely gone.
Mom, who had said nothing, came over to me, wrapped her arms around me and pulled me to the sofa. She hugged me and said, very softly, “You scared me to death, Nikki.”
I nodded into her sweater. I’d never seen Mom so scared that she was quiet. Right now, Mom and Dad had reversed their roles, with Dad ranting and Mom quiet. I saw the protector in Dad and real, true fear in Mom. I resolved never, ever to make them feel like that again.
“I know, Mom. What I had to do was right, but the way I did it was wrong. I feel so many kinds of horrible and crummy and depressed.”
“We’ll talk about your punishment later, but right now tell us where you’ve been.”
“Okay. So Mitch’s mother said if I was meant to find him, I’d find him And I did. I told him he didn’t have to hide from me because I wasn’t angry with him. He couldn’t help something he didn’t know about.
“But then... then he told me that he had known his uncle was going to rob our place. He’d intended to do it when it was vacant before we moved in. Then when we moved in, we messed up his plans. When he told me that, I became so furious. How could he possibly know his uncle intended to rob us and not do anything about it? How could he be so friendly with all of us, knowing his uncle’s plan? I ran away from him. I couldn’t bear how miserable I felt. And I wanted to talk with someone my age. I just... that’s what I felt I had to do. So I called Alex....”
“Who’s Alex?” Dad said, all stormy again.
“Mr. Zingas’ son. We’re in World Lit together, and we’re sort of pals. We weren’t close, but, still, he’s my closest pal here. And he met me at the store and made me some tea and talked with me. He is really remarkable.” I heaved the biggest sigh I think I’ve ever breathed in my life. “And then I came home.”
“And then you came home,” Dad repeated, incredulous.
“I know. If I’m grounded for life, so be it. I don’t have anything going on anyway, so it won’t be different from life as usual.”
“What did this Alex say that was so remarkable?” Dad asked.
“ First, he really listened to everything I said, and then he said something like, Mitch was torn between his new feelings of loyalty to us, while having to worry about his mother. He said he’s met Mitch’s uncle and he’s really scary. He said that if he were in Mitch’s shoes, he’d be in a ‘moral dilemma,’ wanting to do right by us and having to take care of his mother. He said that the the fact that Mitch returned my ring means a lot about his trying to stand by his morals.”
“Returned your ring?” Mom asked, amazed.
“Oh, yeah. I left that out. Mitch told me he returned my ring because it means so much to me.”
“But I found it in your jewelry box.”
“I know, Mom. But even when you handed it to me, I knew it hadn’t been in my jewelry box. It was missing the night we got back from the coast. But it was pointless to argue with you about it.”
“Did you ask Mitch if he returned it?”
“I didn’t have to. He told me he returned it. Then Alex asked if I’d told Mitch about how important Grammy’s ring is to me, and I said no. And he pointed out that that was pretty strange. And he’s right. So it seems like they have access to our place....”
“I had the locks changed the next day,” Mom said. “I didn’t leave the house until the locks were re-keyed. I tried the old keys myself, and they didn’t work.”
“I know,” I said.
“Well, that gives me the creeps.” Mom shivered involuntarily.
“I don’t know the answer to all the questions,” I went on. “But I want to find out. Alex thought it’d be smarter to try and find out the answers before entirely cutting off all ties with Mitch.”
“There is something really fishy here,” Dad said, a deep frown growing from his forehead to his whole face. “I’m not about to have my family at risk. I think we ought to go house hunting tomorrow. This is a beautiful place and we’ll never find anything like it for the same rent, but safety is more important. If your very neighbors pose a threat, well, there’s not much one can do about that other than move away from them. That’s why I was so pleased with Homer and the other doormen and the security guards here. But they’re seven floors away.”
“Oh!” Mom sighed, glancing at the piano.
“Well, Dad, I don’t think we’re in any kind of danger now. Mitch’s uncle is in jail, and he was the threat. Let’s see if we can find out more first. It would really mess up everything, including your work, if we had to move again.”
“It’ll mess up my work if I have to worry about you two all day every day if this place isn’t safe.”
“Nikkei’s right, Sweetheart. Let’s not go off in a tangent. With Mitch’s uncle put away, and Homer on hyper-vigilant, we’re probably safer here now than anywhere.”
Wow! I was impressed with Mom’s logic. It was really interesting to see my parents switch roles.
“I think Alex was right – that Mitch was painted into a corner, and he didn’t know which way to turn. Rather than just running away, I’d like to know more,” I added.
“And I’d certainly like to know more,” Mom agreed. She gave me a long, studied look. I could see she was sorting out some decision. I braced myself for the worst. “You went to a friend you’ve made, you were given very good advice, you’ve taken in that advice, and you feel happier,” She said.
“Yes,” I answered simply, wondering where she was going with this line of thinking.
“That’s all I’ve ever wanted for you by having you go to therapists. Although the way you did what you did this evening is unacceptable, I am no longer going to make therapy appointments for you. From now on, you are welcome to make your own appointments with a counselor if you want, but you are too grown up for me to be making that decision for you. You’ve shown that you are resourceful by going to a peer, who helped you get a balanced perspective.”
“Oh, Mom!” I couldn’t say anything more.
“However, Nikki, if Mitch is part of the criminal element, I do not want you alone with him. And I agree with your dad, as much as I love this place, if in any way it continues to feel unsafe, we’ll have to move.”
Dad was nodding, nodd
ing to everything Mom and I said to each other. “Okay,” he said. “Let’s sleep on it for tonight. Everything will seem clearer in the morning.”
“Yeah, okay. I’m exhausted. I’ve never, ever had such an emotional roller-coaster day. And, again, I’m sorry for making you worry. I’ll won’t do anything like this ever again.” I kissed them good night and went to my room.
When I got there, I closed the door, closed the bathroom and closet doors, and turned the lights out. I lifted the leg of my brass bed, popped off the end cover, and felt Grammy’s emerald tumble out into my hand. I crawled onto the bed and held the ring tightly. I could hear my parents carrying on an quiet but animated conversation in their room, every now and then hearing “Mitch” then “Nikki.”
I wished my Grammy were there. She would see everything so clearly. Mom and Dad are awesome, but they’re too close, and too worried about me. It was wonderful to discover that Alex was so wise and smart – and, too, he had inside knowledge of Mitch and his family. But how could I determine if Mitch was a good guy in a bad environment, or a bad guy who’s very clever? Was he caught up in the middle of an awful situation and not sure himself which way he might turn? Can I help him? Or does he have to figure it out all by himself?
As I had these thoughts, addressing them to Grammy in my mind, the room fell very still, with a deep, palpable quiet. I couldn’t hear my parents talking, I couldn’t hear cars on the street below. Then I saw Grammy in front of me, much fainter than the previous time she’d appeared. In fact, I could only tell it was her more by the feeling than what I saw. I heard Grammy’s voice in my head, not out loud in the room.
“My darling girl, I wish I could stay and help you through every problem you will ever have, but I can’t. I can only tell you that if you follow your heart, it’ll be the right thing to do. I’ll not be able to come to you again, but you must know I’m with you, inside you, throughout this life.You have all the wisdom and patience I ever had. The best way for you to learn is to listen to the knowledge that flows through you, and to follow the example of your parents. Your father is truly one of the gentlest, most moral men you’ll ever meet. I was very privileged to be his mother.”
I struggled to say something back to Grammy, but the syrupy feeling that had bathed me when I saw her before was now more like congealing tree sap. I could neither move nor speak, except deep in my mind, to simply meld with her.
I woke up the next morning, still fully clothed and still clutching Grammy’s ring, knowing that I’d seen my grandmother for the last time. Strangely enough, I didn’t cry. I felt a warmth of peace spread through me, and I understood that I was not sad that Grammy was farther away from me, because she needed to move forward on her journey.
“Yes, dearest Grammy, go. You’re right, I’ll figure it out, and I’ll be okay. But I’ll never stop loving you, and I’ll probably never stop talking to you, and I’ll never stop holding your ring to feel close to you. Thank you for pausing on your journey to give me comfort and advice.”
I got out of bed and showered and dressed for school. It was going to be incredibly hard to concentrate on being a high school kid today, with all the adult things I had to sort out.
In the kitchen, Dad was alone, making waffles. “Good morning, Nikki. How did you sleep?”
“Pretty well, actually. Ahm, Dad, I’d like to tell you something, I mean, I think you’d like to know this, if you promise you won’t think I’m crazy or something.”
“I promise that even if I do think you’re crazy, I won’t let it affect my overall opinion of you too much.”
“Funny. But I’m serious. Can you stop for a minute?”
Dad glanced over his shoulder at me. Something about my expression caught him, and made him realize I needed his undivided attention. “Okay, Sweetie, just let me pour this batter, and I’m all yours.” He poured the batter into the waffle iron, then came over and sat in the breakfast booth across from me. Her took my hand. “Is this about Mitch?”
“No. Well, sort of, I mean, it’s because of Mitch that I... Dad, I’ve seen Grandmother twice since we’ve lived here. On the night that the ring was stolen, and last night.”
Dad gripped my hands a bit tighter, but he didn’t say anything.
“What do you think of that, Dad?”
“I think my Mom was the strongest woman I’ve ever known, and it doesn’t surprise me that she’s got the power to come back and give you some attention. What did she say?”
“She said that she couldn’t come to me again, but that it was all right, because I had ‘the wisdom’ in me. And that I should follow the example of you and Mom, and that you are one of the gentlest, most moral men I’ll ever know in my life, and she said it was a privilege to have been your mother.”
Dad had shed a few tears at Grammy’s funeral, but I’d never in my life seen Dad with tears streaming down his face like they were now. “Well, Angel-Girl,” he finally said in a whisper, “I truly believe you saw her.’ He squeezed my hands then dried his face. “I don’t know how to thank you for sharing that with me.” He stood and took the golden brown, fresh, fat, delicious smelling waffle from the waffle iron.
There was a peaceful quiet in the room between us. A couple minutes later Mom came in the kitchen. “It smells fantastic! Waffles from scratch – what inspired you?”
“Love and a raging appetite.”
Mom nodded. “Orange juice, Nikki?”
“Okay.”
“What have you decided about Mitch?” she asked as she poured three glasses of orange juice.
“That he has to figure out for himself if he’s going to forgive himself and el me in his life, or not.”
“Yes. That’s good. Your dad and I have decided not to ground you, but you are not to go off somewhere with Mitch without us knowing exactly were you are. If you can’t be where we know you are, you’ll have to wait.”
“Okay, Mom. That’s more than fair. I will be patient.”
I thought it’d be almost impossible to be at school that day. But it wasn’t. Knowing where Mitch was, shifting away from being furious at him and feeling betrayed by him, having gotten closer to Alex, and being in the after-glow of Grammy’s visitation, all made me calm, centered and attentive to my school work.
But I did wonder when and how I’d get to talk to Mitch.
Chapter XIV
As it turned out, I didn’t have to wonder for long.
“Mitch called me,” Mom said when I came through the door after school. “He said he’s home now. He apologized to me. I was very moved by his sincerity. He wants you to call him.”
My heart raced as I plopped my books down. It couldn’t have been easy for him to gather up the courage to apologize to my mother. “What did he say?”
“He was clearly nervous. He stuttered. He said he knew he owed your dad and me an explanation and he hoped we’d give him a chance to talk with him.”
“What did you say?”
“That we probably would. But I told him that he had to make things right with you first.”
“Oh, Mom!” I couldn’t say more. She was amazing!
“I see you’re hurting, Nikki, and I don’t want you to hurt if Mitch can make you feel better. Of course, he may not. But I know my Nikki will make the best of whatever happens.”
I nodded and went to my room, then dialed his number.
“Hi, Mitch, it’s Nikki.”
“Hi,” he said quietly.
“Do you want to come over and talk? I mean, we have to talk in person. We can’t have this conversation on the phone.”
“With you folks and you all at once?”
“No. Just me. We can talk in my room.”
“Good. Because there’s something else I didn’t tell you.”
“There’s more?” What more could there possibly be?
“Sort of. Shall I come over now?”
“Please.”
I hung up and looked around my room – not too bad, no underwear lying about, at least. The doorbell chimed, and I heard Mom answer it before I could get to it.
“Hi,” I said, coming down the hall. He turned and looked at me. Ohh! Those eyes – he was so beautiful! But I had to keep my head on straight, and I had to have a truthful conversation with him, whatever the results might be. “Mom, we’re going into my room to talk, okay?”
“Okay. Leave the door open a bit.”
“All right.” Die of embarrassment, I thought. Right here, right now. Everyone knew what “leave the door open” meant.
“Make yourself comfortable,” I said, closing the door as far as I dared while wishing I’d taken a chair into my room. All I had was the little backless boudoir chair and the bed.
Mitch looked around the room then sat on the floor.
I sat on the floor in front of him. “You said you have more things to tell me, and I have some things to say to you, so who starts?”
“I think you should begin,” he answered. “Because part of what I have to say is, well, I have to show you something.”
“Okay. When I talked with you yesterday – was it only yesterday? – I got so furious because you didn’t do anything to stop your uncle from ripping us off. But then I talked with... a bunch of people, and they all kind of said that since your uncle is an immoral, mean guy, and since you live with him and your mom, you might have been in an extremely tough spot, feeling responsible to take care of your mom, and at the same time maybe feeling terrible about what happened to us. Everyone reminded me that you could only do so much. And because of that, you were left with feeling guilty. And then I made it worse, I suppose by getting so angry with you.”
