by Amanda Rose
“Hey, Pierre,” I call, waving back. I watch him as he looks down at all the kids and pulls a face. They all laugh like he’s the funniest thing they’ve ever seen.
“He is so goddamn cute, isn’t he?” I turn to see Shawna walk towards me, a huge grin plastered over her face. She sits down next to me on the bench. “So, what happened last night? You went downstairs with Luke, then when I tried to find you later you’d gone. When I asked around after you some really fit guy with the greenest eyes and the sexiest smile I’ve ever seen said you’d left.”
“Yeah, sorry about that. I was a bit knackered. Decided to head back early.”
“Sure, no sweat. That fit guy though, he was smoking hot. He was with two other men. The bearded guy was all over one of the dancers. I heard he asked her back to his place after her shift had finished.”
“He did. She left not long ago.”
“What?” Shawna says, her mouth dropping open in a delighted laugh. She claps her mitten-covered hands together. “You mean your family are those three hotties. Did any of them come with a girlfriend?”
“Nope. I basically think they’re here to fuck,” I say, remembering Hudson’s hand on my stomach.
“Ah, it all makes sense now,” Shawna says, her face lighting up.
“What makes sense?”
“They are the brothers Freed.”
“Freed? That’s their surname?” I laugh at the ridiculousness of it. “I suppose they like to be free to get into women’s knickers.”
Shawna giggles, shuffling up next to me on the bench. “Apparently, they’re not really brothers. That’s just what they tell everyone. Rumour has it they all grew up in some care home and that all of them had shitty mothers.”
My head snaps around to look at Shawna. “Who told you that?” I ask.
“Luke told me about them, or rather he warned me about the brothers Freed when I first started here.”
“Is that so?”
“He said that there were these three brothers who come here every year for the whole skiing season. That they are wealthy, love to party, and love women. According to Luke, they shag their way through the holidaymakers, resort staff, chalet girls, locals. A different girl every night. They’re a bunch of lotharios and are amazing in bed by all accounts, but emotionally fucked-up. Like, big time.”
“Yep, I reckon that just about sums them up,” I say, feeling angrier by the minute at Hudson’s advances. What a total prick.
“Well, shit. If I were you I’d be offering myself up on a platter. They are ridiculously gorgeous.” She looks at me and I can’t help but laugh at the face she pulls even though there’s no way I am going there. Nope, the brother’s Freed were off limits.
“I’m telling you, Louisa, there isn’t a hot-blooded woman on this planet who wouldn’t get her clothes off for one of those three hunks.”
“Well there’s me,” I say, trying to forget the moment by the sink with Hudson a few minutes ago. That had been a complete lapse in judgment.
“I don’t believe it. You can’t tell me that you wouldn’t jump in bed with one of them given half the chance?”
“They love themselves a bit too much for my liking,” I mumble.
Shawna narrows her eyes at me. “What aren’t you saying? Please tell me you shagged one of them?”
“No, I haven’t shagged one of them, and I don’t intend to either. The brothers Freed are not for me. I don’t do damaged goods,” I say, mostly because my own damaged soul is enough to contend with. There isn’t room in my life for any more.
“Hudson, how are you doing, mate?” a man says as he’s skiing towards us. Shawna and I both flip our heads around and find ourselves staring at the brothers Freed. All three are looking at me. All of them look pissed as hell. Fuck.
For the rest of the day, I avoid going back to the chalet. I do not want another confrontation with the brothers so I take a trip up the mountain instead to observe the skiers as they speed down the slope. Despite it being cold enough for snow, the sun still feels warm on my face, and I understand now why so many people have a tan. The view from the café is incredible. When I sit in the outside seating area I feel as though I am on the top of the world and that all my troubles back home are just tiny specks of dust like the skiers at the bottom of the piste. But my feelings of freedom and peace are short lived when I realise that I must go back to the chalet to prepare the evening meal and face the brothers once more. I pay for my drinks and food at the bar then take the lift back down the slope. Half an hour later I am back at the chalet.
“Well, if it isn’t our very own Ice-Queen,” Max slurs as I enter.
The place is heaving, full of people I don’t recognise and some that I did. Clara, the bitch from this morning, is draped around Bryce’s shoulders, her cherry lips pulling on his earlobes. For some ridiculous reason, it pisses me off. Clara whispers something in his ear, and he turns to look at me, his eyes narrowing. When Clara kisses him, he pulls her close, all the while looking directly at me. My heart drums way too loudly in my chest and I turn away just as Max stumbles forward, this time I am the one to catch him. He can barely stand up straight. I take the can of beer out of his hand and manoeuvre him through the throng of people.
“I think you should go lie down before you pass out,” I say. He really must have knocked back a lot of booze considering a well-stacked guy like him could be so thoroughly drunk. He is almost at the stage of oblivion. I recognise the signs, I have seen it often enough with my own mother. When I look about the room, most of the people are in no better state than he is. I guess this is the partying Freed brothers, Luke had told Shawna so much about.
“I’ll help you get him upstairs,” Hudson says approaching us. He places an empty glass on a side table nearby and wraps Max’s arm around his shoulder. There is a woman watching us. She looks older, more sophisticated than most of the other revellers in the room, with long blonde hair a few shades darker than mine and the prettiest steel-grey eyes. She is stunning.
“Hudson, do you need me to help?” she asks.
He turns to her. “No, Louisa and I can manage. I won’t be long, Sacha.”
“He’s had too much to drink,” I say, stating the obvious. I can feel Sacha’s eyes on me. She’s taking the opportunity to look me up and down as though I am a threat. I give her a smile, one that says there’s no need to worry about me, but she just raises a haughty eyebrow. I dislike her immediately.
Hudson nods his head. “Max tends to knock the drink back when he’s hurting.”
Hurting? Why would he be hurting? I don’t ask, not sure I wanted to get into a conversation about some girl Max might be pining after.
Together we manage to get Max upstairs and into his bedroom. I haven’t been in it before now and I am surprised by the sheer size of it. In the centre of the room is a huge king-sized bed covered in soft cream blankets, complimenting the warm wood of the walls. We lay Max down. Hudson takes his shoes off and pulls an eiderdown over him, and then he does something completely unexpected and extraordinarily tender. He leans down and kisses Max on the forehead. It’s not at all sexual, more like a father kissing his son at bedtime but it surprises me nonetheless. Hudson turns to face me and noticing the look on my face, sighs.
“Despite what you might think. I am not a complete arsehole. None of us are.”
I don’t say anything, we just stand and stare at each other. I can tell he has more to say, so I wait.
“The rumours you heard are true. We are not blood-related, although in every other way Max and Bryce are my brothers. I have looked out for them since we ended up in the same care home together. I left at eighteen, worked hard, got a place. As soon as they were old enough to leave, they came to live with me. We’ve been inseparable ever since. We work together, we live together still. I don’t think that will ever change.”
I nod my head. “And the women? Sacha?” I say waving my hand around, hoping he understood what I meant. What I really want to know is
why he set his sights on me this morning. Why it had been so important for him to make me want him. Wait? Did I want him? I shake the thought aside, not willing to go there. Besides, he’s clearly moved on already. Or rather switched his sights to someone else.
“They are a symptom of a fucked-up issue we all have…” He sits on the edge of the bed careful not to disturb the now sleeping Max and looks up at me, his green eyes flecked with pain. “We were all abandoned by our mothers. Not all in the same way, but abandoned nonetheless. I guess we find comfort in the arms of women. Fuck, I don’t know. Sacha is someone I’ve known for some years. We are fuck buddies, that’s all.” Hudson pulls a shaking hand through his hair. For whatever reason, he feels the need to share this information with me. I’m about to ask why when he gets up off the bed and walks towards me, standing just inside what is a comfortable distance. Remembering the way he made me feel earlier, I step back needing space between us. A strange riot of emotions clamour for my attention but I push them down.
He looks at me wide-eyed. “Christ, I have no idea why I feel the need to share any of this with you. I don’t know what it is but there’s something about you, something I recognise…” His voice trails off at the look of horror on my face. Am I that emotionally scarred by my mother that everyone could spot the deadness inside of me?
“What did I say?” Hudson raises his hand to my face as a rebellious tear pours from my eye. I am stronger than this. For so many years I have kept this well of pain within me, and for some reason amongst these men, it is trying to escape.
“You are not the only ones to have suffered a cruel childhood, Hudson. Although my mother is still in my life, she abandoned me a long time ago for the oblivion she could find at the bottom of a bottle. So, I get what it’s like. I understand, truly.”
Hudson moves towards me, surprise, guilt, then sorrow tracking across his features. I take another step away. “Perhaps Max is right, perhaps I am the Ice-Queen. I don’t have room in me for more lost souls, my own is more than enough to deal with. Besides, I wouldn’t give away something so precious to a person who uses women so carelessly. I’ve seen my mother do that time and time again. That isn’t me,” I say, my voice cracking with emotion. I turn away from Hudson and walk towards the door.
“Louisa,” he says, staring at me. He looks so lost, so vulnerable that I almost, almost, go back into the room.
“Yes?”
“I am sorry, for earlier. That was the fucked-up me, the one that needs to make every woman he meets want him. You don’t want me, any of us it would seem, and it made me mad. I guess I wanted to prove to myself that I could have you if I wished. I was an arsehole. I didn’t mean to upset you. I will back off.”
I look up at him, at the tiny beauty spot that sits just under his eye, at his full pink mouth. I look at Max sleeping peacefully on the bed, I remember the look in Bryce’s eyes as I ignored his attempts at making me jealous this morning, and sigh.
“You are all beautiful, any woman would be mad not to be flattered by your advances. But I can’t give you what you want. I am too broken already to allow any more people in to break what’s left of my heart. I can’t just have sex without it meaning something. I won’t be used like that, and none of you can have meaningful relationships. That’s pretty clear.”
“Louisa…” he starts, but I hold my hand up.
“Hudson, I am not like other women. I won’t be a part of any games, yours or your brothers. I’m going to go to my room now. Tomorrow, when Max has recovered and you guys are alone together I would appreciate it if you can make clear to them both what my position is. I am here to work, that is it. There is nothing beyond that. Fuck whoever you want, just don’t try to fuck me over. If you don’t think you can do that, then I will happily swap with another chalet-girl.”
With that I turn on my heel and head to my room, passing a scowling Sacha on the way down. I didn’t care if she heard what I said, I am no threat to her. It’s all the other available women she needed to watch out for.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Since my discussion with Hudson two weeks ago when Max passed out at their impromptu party, the boundaries I have put in place have seemed to work for us all. The brothers have stopped trying to get into my knickers and we have all settled into an easy, relaxed rhythm. Every morning breakfast is dished up at eight am. We sit and chat together whilst we all eat, then we spend the day apart. I hang out on my own or with Shawna and the brothers go skiing, or fucking, I’m not really sure what they do with their day, and frankly, I don’t ask. Then we come together again in the evening for supper where we sit and discuss what we’ve done in the day or talk about general, light-hearted stuff. The conversations never get deep, the brothers never mention the women they are seeing and somehow an easy friendship has begun to form between the four of us.
This morning I am feeling revived after an early morning swim in the pool and a quick go in the sauna. The brothers have no issues with me using the facilities so long as breakfast is served at eight am sharp. Turning back to the task at hand I dish up the full English breakfast they have come to expect every morning and place the warmed plates on the kitchen island. My phone rings, making me almost drop a plate when I see who’s calling.
“Hi, Mum,” I say trying to hide the note of dread in my voice. She hasn’t rung me at all since I’ve been here. Had it not been for Richard’s regular texts I wouldn’t have known what was going on back home. Last night he had sent me a message saying that he thought mum was up to something fishy and warning me that there was trouble brewing. Hence the nauseous feeling when answering the phone now.
“I need five hundred quid,” Mum says. No hello, how are you? No, how are you getting on? Christmas day is only three days away, but there’s no mention of that either. Mum’s straight to the point as always.
“I don’t have five hundred quid, Mum,” I say. “I don’t get paid until the end of the month. Can’t it wait until then?”
“No, it can’t bloody well wait. I need the money now. I’ve got a loan-shark after my arse. They’ll get nasty if I don’t find the money soon,” Mum whines.
I have the sudden urge to scream. “Can’t you ask Dom? Maybe he can help you out,” I say instead.
Mum’s laugh is high and brittle. “Dom’s fucked off and Paul hasn’t got that kind of money.”
“Who’s Paul?”
“My new fella of course,” she says. “Please, Louisa. I wouldn’t ask if I had the money myself.”
Frankly, there is fat chance of mum ever having any money. She didn’t work, and all her benefit money went on booze. “All right, Mum. I’ll get it for you,” I say quietly, not wishing for the brothers to overhear my conversation. “But you have to give me a bit of time.”
“I don’t have time. It has to be today, or I am screwed.”
I almost say, ‘aren’t you always’ but I hold my tongue, not wishing to get into an argument with her.
“Fine, I’ll sort it,” I say, clicking my phone off and chucking it onto the kitchen counter. I knew this would happen. I knew that this was too good to be true. I’ve been here just two damn weeks and she’s already asking me to get her out of some shit she has got herself into back home because I am not there to babysit her. How in the hell had she managed to get herself into trouble with a loan-shark? “Damn it,” I say slamming my hand on the counter. Why couldn’t she stay out of trouble? Why couldn’t she leave me alone?
“Everything alright?”
I turn around to see Bryce staring at me. He’s dressed in a soft black tracksuit slung low over his hips and a tight fitting white t-shirt. His hair is pulled up in a high bun on his head and his beard is neatly groomed even though it’s only eight o’clock in the morning.
“Fine,” I say, giving him the best smile I can muster. “Chalet-girl stuff, that’s all.”
He nods and sits on one of the stools.
“Morning, Icy,” Max says as he skids into the room.
“Morning
, Jester,” I retort, laughing despite myself. He’s such a big kid at heart that my nickname suits him perfectly. Besides, he calls me Icy, so I have to get my own back somehow.
A moment later Hudson steps into the kitchen with dishevelled hair and sleep still pulling at his eyes. He isn’t much of an early riser, but he always got up with his brothers because, well, that’s just what he did.
“Morning,” he mumbles.
“Morning, Hudson,” I say, handing him a cup of coffee.
“Shall I ask Louisa then?” Max says, looking from Hudson to Bryce.
“Ask me what?” I say, dishing up their breakfast.
“Well, if you haven’t already noticed, it’s Christmas day soon and Bryce, Hudson and I usually head out to a cabin further up the mountain. It gets a bit busy down here in the resort. We thought you might want to come too,” Max says, almost shyly.
“I see.” I glance at each brother in turn. “I’m not sure. I mean I don’t want to get in the way of your celebrations. I imagine you’ll have company. I’ll be fine on my own.” I take a sip of my lukewarm coffee and peer at the brothers over the rim of the cup.
“There won’t be anyone else. Just us, and you. If you want to join us that is,” Hudson says, his eyes never leaving mine.
“But I thought you’d want to have, you know…” I wave my hand around in the air. “Company,” I finish. Sex, that’s what I wanted to say. Basically, it sounded like the perfect place to take a few girls and have an orgy.
“We’ve never invited a woman to the cabin, but we’d like your company. None of us are particularly interested in anyone else’s right now,” Hudson says, then slams his mouth shut. Bryce and Max both give him a look that makes me think there is more to this request than meets the eye.
“Um, I don’t know.”
All three of them are staring at me whilst I dither between my sudden desire to be alone with them in a cabin in the mountains, and the urge to run screaming from the chalet. I can see Bryce’s expectant look; Max’s hopeful expression and Hudson’s hot gaze and I feel incredibly uncomfortable in my skin all of a sudden.
