by S L Lewis
As much as I wanted to say ‘I told you so’, I saw my sister’s shaken state as though she was reliving the evening so I hugged and comforted her with, ‘well, be glad that nothing worse happened and now we know what Tiziana’s like, we don’t need to be around her anymore,’ I concluded and she agreed.
Ten minutes later the door bell rang and mum went to answer it.
‘Renesh and Shilpa are here girls,’ she announced as she invited them in.
With all the hugs and small talk over, we went to the table and began dinner.
The beautiful, succulent meat danced around my mouth as mum engaged us with her Ireland holiday idea and more suggestions for Gabrielle’s engagement party.
Renesh and Shilpa joined in but you could see there was some awkwardness between them, which did not go unnoticed by mum.
‘So, how is work going, Shilpa?’ mum asked whilst trying to break the tense atmosphere between them. The table went quiet and Renesh shot of glare of annoyance at Shilpa. ‘It’s going ok mum. Just a lot of work to do at the moment but hopefully it’ll settle down soon,’ she replied with sorrow in her voice.
I looked at Renesh with irritation, as I felt he had no right to be annoyed after what I saw near the gym.
I couldn’t handle his antagonistic frowns anymore so I interrupted mum’s further light questions. ‘So Renesh, how are you handling not having your lovely wife at your beck and call when you need her,’ I enquired with a raised eyebrow.
My suspicious investigation went unnoticed. ‘Very funny Neets and it would be nice to see her more but I know how important work is to her so I’m trying to be supportive and not make a big deal out of it.’
Mum smiled as she accepted his valiant response and like a dog that just got a treat from his owner for performing a trick correctly, he returned mum’s smile and his expression went back to normal.
After dinner, Shilpa and Gabrielle helped mum clear away the dishes, which gave me the perfect chance to confront Renesh with what I saw. ‘So bro, how are things really going? Did you do the romantic evening with Shilpa?’ I probed. He was unaware of my suspicions as he replied, ‘Yeah but she was too tired again to enjoy it so we just went to bed. I’m getting so sick of trying Neets and getting nothing back.’
I laughed to myself as I thought about all the lies Angus used on me about his wife so this was all too familiar. With the rage building from finding out about Angus and his still, very much alive marriage, I retorted, ‘Ahhh, so since Shilpa was too tired to give you a quick session cos she has been working so hard to build a future for you both, you decided to thank her by fucking the latest tramp you picked up at the gym. How long have you been seeing this hoe?’
Obviously, taken aback by my knowledge of his recent secret activities, Renesh took a step back and looked around to see if anyone else heard the revelation.
The radio was on in the kitchen and mum was entertaining the pair with stories from her past, so there was no way they heard but that didn’t stop Renesh pulling me into the hallway and shutting the door. ‘What on earth are you on about?’ he stuttered, looking flustered.
I regarded him with a long, disapproving stare as I continued. ‘Don’t try to weasel your way out of this one Renesh, I have proof and with that I showed him the picture on my phone.
He examined the picture for a few moments and collapsed on the stairs with his head in his hands.
I refused to console him so I just stood in front of him to make him aware I wanted answers immediately.
He looked up and I saw the colour drain from his face as he started to explain. ‘I didn’t mean to cheat. You have to believe me, Neets. It’s just been really hard with Shilpa working all the time and I’m not blaming her but I was just feeling lonely. I thought I could keep myself busy with joining the gym but then I met Manisha and she was such a good listener,’ he paused to listen to see if anyone was coming so I jumped in and spat. ‘If she’s a good listener then why didn’t you let her listen to your woes, whilst she was running next to you on the treadmill? I don’t understand how much listening she could be doing on top of you.’
Usually I wouldn’t be so crude with Renesh but the anger was boiling inside me and I couldn’t take any more of his lame excuses. ‘We enjoyed each other’s company and eventually an attraction built up. I knew I should have backed off but I was so lonely Neets, I just wasn’t thinking,’ he cried.
‘So how long has this been going on?’ I whispered as I sat next to him and put my arm around him, as I began to realise I was being a hypocrite.
He seemed grateful for my now calmer nature and continued, ‘about three months’.
I gave him a hug before I stated, ‘you need to end this now as it’s not fair to Shilpa’ and he agreed.
We spent the next few minutes giving each other a hug until we were summoned by mum to get our desserts.
**********
‘In work already, Nita? I like this punctuality. Especially after a weekend,’ Ann admired.
Monday came around faster than my bank statements to tell me just how much money I did not have in my account for this month!
Even though I came to work with a heavy heart, after seeing Angus playing the ‘devoted husband’ on Saturday, I still wanted the promotion in Research, so I planned to work my socks off for the next few weeks to show I could cope with the work load Ann was giving me, taking an extra interest in the different systems they used in the Research department and studying the types of day to day work they did.
‘Yep. I just wanted to get a head start,’ I replied without looking up.
This was my motto for the next few weeks along with avoiding Angus and trying to get my parents back together.
Angus tried to explain the events of Saturday night by saying, ‘it’s not what you think, Nita. We were around some very influential people and we had to put on a show. That’s all it was.’
This was the first time I had ever looked at him clearly and I saw him in a different light.
He no longer looked like the strong, arrogant Casanova I once thought I was falling in love with.
Instead, he looked like this opportunistic, weak, egotistical prat, who wouldn’t have looked out of place on a night out with a group of men having a mid life crisis ready to pounce on anything that looks half their age!
Leaning back in his chair, thinking I had accepted his apology, he began to smile. ‘I’ve just come for you to sign these receipts, Mr. Maguire,’ I replied coolly.
Not fazed by my icy exterior, he continued with his performance, ‘you know I want you, Nita. Don’t be like this. Although, if you’re angry, then that means we’ll be “making up” soon, right? Just give me a rough idea as to how long I’ll have to wait.’
I couldn’t believe his smugness!
‘What a sleaze! Slime ball! Wanker!’ I thought as I gritted my teeth and moved closer to his desk.
This got him excited and he leaned forward, thinking I was going to kiss him. ‘If you think I’m going to buy that excuse then your more stupid than you look! You were a toy. A fling. Nothing more. So please do not delude yourself by thinking you were anything more or that this will continue. I’ve had my fun and now its time to move onto bigger and better things, so enough of your sleaze as this is our place of work and you need to start acting more professional,’ I spat at him as I backed away. The colour drained from his face.
I felt like I was on top of the world!
Nothing could bring me down!
I actually felt in control of my emotions and no longer wanted to take back the speech, as thoughts of my country wedding with Angus, our children running in from their private schools with their funny stories of their school day and my afternoon teas with the other elite wives of businessmen and maybe even some celebrities, disappear from my mind.
‘So you’re over this then, are you?’ he asked smugly, leaning further back into his already reclining chair. Without hesitation I replied, ‘yes I am. Now if you don’t mind
I’ll take the receipt and get back to work.’
I began to walk towards the door, making sure I had the last word. ‘So, how shall I write your reference for the Assistant position in Research then?’ he shouted as I turned and looked at him with rage in my eyes.
I took a step forward and stopped, fearing if I went any further and I would be escorted off the premises by security for putting my boss in hospital.
Gathering my thoughts and composure, I commented, ‘well, I would hope you would be painting me in a glowing light, unless you would like to receive a letter of complaint on your desk regarding unprofessional conduct and sexual harassment of an employee.’ He started laughing nervously.
‘How is it sexual harassment? You consented to this affair,’ he retorted as he pretended to flick through some papers on his desk.
I laughed and this distracted his attention, making him shift in his chair at my new confident state. ‘I did indulge in this affair; however, if I don’t want to go down the sexual harassment route then I would definitely like to go down the tabloid route! Airing all our dirty little encounters would be great for your reputation with London’s elite, wouldn’t it?! Think of it…one of your mistresses not being able to be silenced by you? Such a dent to your powerful appearance, right?!’ and with this assertion, I pulled my mobile phone out of my pocket and pressed the call button.
Angus’s mouth dropped open as he got up to walk towards me. ‘Errr, I think you should stay where you are, don’t you? We wouldn’t want assault added to the list, would we?’ I asked smugly.
I walked through the door, not looking back as I wanted this feeling of victory to last.
And it did, all the way to the evening, when I agreed to go to a bar with Amelia and Anya to celebrate my new found determination.
‘This is to Neets and her new found strength to get rid of that nobhead and start meeting real men,’ Amelia announced as we all agreed and clinked our glasses.
Celebrating my new freedom came in the form of a lot of alcohol, interrogating Anya about Dolph and our thoughts and feelings about Tiziana.
‘I knew she wasn’t a PA, what did I tell you Neets?’ Amelia gloated as I nodded in agreement.
‘Did you hear how she treated Gabby when she joined her back at the guy’s flat?’ I asked, guessing that they hadn’t as they both put down their glasses in suspense.
I explained the story to gasps, shaking of heads and hands going up to tell me they couldn’t take anymore.
‘What a bitch. How could she stay when the guy did that to Gabby?’ Amelia shouted.
‘I told you she’s nasty,’ Anya added as she sipped her drink supremely.
She put her glass down to continue. ‘I heard one story about her, back in de 90s when she first started, that she told a client that she would give him a discount if he vonted to invite more friend’s to join. He obviously accepted and she ended up with five men. I don’t think she got more than a grand!’
Trust Anya to always bring it back to money!
Amelia couldn’t get her words out, so I thought I should try to say what she wanted to. ‘That’s disgusting! Is there anything she wouldn’t do for a quick buck?’ I asked not wanting to know the answer.
Anya shook her head and replied. ‘In the business, you have to be flexible, yes? But I have my rules and limits to keep some class, but she vould sell her own mother to get a Gucci bag.’
We all laughed at Anya’s last cutting comment, we all vowed to no longer associate with Tiziana, to organise a fantastic engagement party for Gabrielle and to find decent men, worthy of our remarkableness!
Chapter Five – The Past coming to haunt the present…will it affect the future?
The previous month was one of highs and lows!
All of us (minus Gabrielle) had major men troubles, which determined our paths for the following weeks. My mother and father were still separated, giving us no hope that this problem would be resolved any time soon, Renesh was still trying to fix his marriage whilst dealing with the guilt of his affair and I was successful in the interview for the position in Research and was blowing everyone away with my professionalism.
‘Babe, this is the beginning of your new “life” so welcome to Research and it’s just onwards and upwards from now,’ Sarah announced in her speech as we clinked glasses and celebrated my achievement at the bar near work.
I occasionally saw Angus in the corridors or meetings, however, our situation was laid to rest and I had no feelings towards him until I saw him flirting with the new secretaries or administrators, which made me feel sorry for them instead of being angry.
I had lost a few pounds in weight, changed my wardrobe and started feeling more optimistic about my future, so when dad offered to buy me dinner at my favourite restaurant after work, I jumped at the invite.
The restaurant was quiet, rustic and relaxing.
Candles in old wine bottles, Italian opera singers belting out dramatic pieces of work with an outstanding orchestra enhancing the words on a low setting in the background; smells of fresh herbs, succulent homemade sauces and spicy meats floating from the kitchen, bringing in curious revellers from the street. Dad sat alone in the corner with a glass of deep red wine, looking lonely and disheartened. ‘Hey dad, how’s it going?’ I asked with a big hug and a nod to the waiter as he came across with the speed of Bolt to show me the wine list.
I took off my coat to hang it on the back of the chair and picked up the menu like an eager child ready for my treat.
‘Not good Neets, I miss your mum and need her back,’ he replied as he choked back the tears to give the waiter our orders.
We awkwardly waited for him to leave before we continued, ‘I know she thinks I’ve cheated on her but I haven’t,’ he stated as we indulged in the garlic bread that the waiter sneaked onto the table. ‘Well, why didn’t you tell her dad?’ I asked.
He took a pause and protested, ‘she didn’t allow me the chance to explain and I was a bit angry that after all these years, she could think I would ever do that to her.’
Thoughts of my own experiences with infidelities came to mind. I wondered for a second why my mother didn’t believe my dad immediately but they were my parents and I believed my dad when he said he didn’t cheat, so I vowed to help him get mum back but first I needed to know what I was working with.
‘Dad, you know I will help you get back with mum but first of all I need you to stop being so secretive about your past and tell me about this woman on the phone, you know your first wife? What’s her problem?’ I inquired, whilst trying not to put too much pressure on him.
He took a deep breath, looked around and started. ‘I would never keep anything from you Nita. You are my beautiful daughter, who I adore and I always try to be open and honest with all my children so here it goes…you know I was married to a woman before your mother?’ he asked as I just nodded with a mouthful of warm bread.
Looking away as though it was hard for him to say whilst looking at me, he continued, ‘her name is Shampa and she was the daughter of my father’s friend from back home. The arrangement was for me to marry her so I could work over here, which I agreed to, but when I realised, after a few months of the marriage, that I wasn’t in love with her, I needed to get out. I told her I thought we should divorce but she wouldn’t agree to it. She started to hurt herself, threatened to tell the authorities it was a forced marriage, when I suggested separating or anything divorce related, and kept saying we could work things out but we were completely different and I knew I couldn’t go on with it. Eventually, to avoid the drama, I started to live a separate life. I moved into the spare room and after a few weeks of arguing about this, she accepted it. We married in January and by October I met your mother, moved out two months after and started divorce proceedings. There were a few protests, lies of pregnancies and threats from her but eventually I just ignored them and moved into a small flat with your mother and never looked back. Your grandmother never approved of me marrying your
mother and disowned me, unless I agreed to get back with Shampa and that is everything to date.’
By this point, the main meal had come but I couldn’t take a bite.
I was in shock.
Although I knew about this woman, I didn’t know the extent of their married life. Separate bedrooms? Months of unhappiness? Self harm? I needed to know more as I started to feel sorry for her. ‘I can’t imagine how you coped with that dad,’ I said sympathetically as I held onto his hand to show my support, ‘but how do you know she was lying about being pregnant?’ I asked cautiously.
