“You haven’t listened,” Alaire said, scowling.
“I have listened,” I reasoned, “but I can’t leave you here alone!”
“Look at me.” Alaire gripped onto my arm, pulling me toward him. Reaching up with his other hand, he moved several strands of hair behind my ear.
“I am not better,” he spoke slowly, enunciating each word with precise accuracy.
I turned away, attempting to pretend that I hadn’t heard those four words. He was accepting his condition, yet I only seemed to prolong his suffering. We had come this far together, and all along he continued to prove that his intentions were honest. I was there for him in this desperate time like I had never been for anyone else, and I was determined to do whatever it took to save him.
“I won’t leave you,” I said.
“It’s harsh, I know, but there is no other way. I cannot sit… I definitely can’t walk,” Alaire reasoned.
When I tried to push away, he pulled me in closer and my heart thumped.
“Then I will carry you. Mergental is not far from here, is it?” The answer was obvious before I asked the question. It was foolish of me to offer carrying Alaire; he was heavier than me and with his injury, he might be more difficult to hold.
“It could take all night if you have to carry me,” Alaire sighed and then coughed, “You’ll die from weakness before we arrive.”
I want to be strong for you. I want to see this through, I thought. Alaire and I were the ones depending on survival skills to keep us alive. Weakness was the least of my worries. My focus was on Alaire, and I couldn’t watch him die in fear of my own well-being.
Out loud I asked, “Why are you agreeing to this? Why do you want me to leave you stranded in a field where another magician could attack you or an animal might discover you?”
I could not let him die. He was the one who found me when I was alone, and he was the one who said we shouldn’t have to lose anything else. All I had now in my life was him. Alaire was the one man who hadn’t left me, the one man who sincerely showed his emotions. I’d risk my life for him like he had done for me, and though that wouldn’t stop the guilt either of us felt about our past, it would make us stronger. With our lives at risk, this was not about any fate we may face. This was about fighting for each other in the eye of the storm.
Alaire squeezed my arm. I winced at his words as he said, “If this is to be our end, we have to become better than them; we have to make a final stand for ourselves. You’re here fighting for me when I want you to be out there. Be strong for me, for us.”
I was at a loss for words. With the way he spoke, no one would have known he was in pain. While his voice was low and his breath wheezed out, he pronounced his words clearly.
“Celestria,” he said more sternly, “you underestimate what we are stuck in the middle of. When I first learned Dark magic I was a shadow in the light. Soon I discovered I could move that shadow, and then…”
He motioned for me to move closer, and though I lowered my head, I remained cautious.
Alaire struggled to raise his head to my ear and then at last whispered, “The light was consumed so quickly that even now I do not know where it has gone.”
Leaning back, the words struck with uncomfortable familiarity. Shadows and lights, I had heard that before. Unlike Léal, though, it didn’t sound like Alaire was afraid of the shadows.
“I’m not sure I understand,” I admitted with a blank stare.
He frowned. “I was consumed by my magic. I enjoyed every moment I spent in the darkness, even though it sucked the humanity out of me. It took the loss of Jacquette and Esmour’s death for me to realize that. It took meeting you for me to realize I didn’t have to be that man anymore. I don’t want to be that man anymore.
“Do you want this to end? Join the battle. Wake up, Celestria; this is not one of your nightmares.”
He said it wasn’t a nightmare as if to mock me for when I had told him about the nightmares I was having. I tried to loosen his hand from my arm, but his grip remained firm.
“Please let me go. You’re hurting me,” I mumbled.
At last Alaire released my arm from his hold.
Standing up, I brushed off my dress and said, “I’ll bring Grefin here the moment I find him.”
Seeing as he would never agree to travel with me, I would have to arrive at Grefin’s as quickly as possible. I couldn’t face him any longer, for he had told me about a side of him I would have otherwise never knew existed. No matter who he had been in his past, he was here in the present. I would do everything to keep him in my future. It was time I stopped taking everything for granted.
With a new mindset, I decided to leave the canteen with Alaire. Whatever water was left he would need. Then there was also the diamond, which would be too dangerous for me to carry any longer. I pointed this dilemma out to Alaire, who pointed to his belt around his pants. I tucked the diamond inside the sword carrier, which remained empty.
“You never told me the story behind the diamond,” Alaire said.
I sighed, “Dyanna gave it to me; I’ll explain later.”
“Right. Well,” he continued, “Grefin is wealthy and well-known. You shouldn’t have any trouble finding him.”
I nodded, stepping into my sandals. As I began walking away Alaire called out to me. I glanced back, and I felt somewhat relieved that so long as he lay in the field travelers wouldn’t see him unless they walked directly past him.
“Celestria, be careful out there,” he warned.
“I will so long as you stay here and try to remain still. If you’re in danger, use your magic to protect yourself,” I said.
For the first time in a while he smiled, just a little. Then the smile reached his eyes, illuminating them like a candle fire.
“Ah, she’s smart and beautiful!” he laughed.
I grinned at the compliment, but before I could leave there was one last thing left to do. I dragged my feet to the dead man’s body, knelt down, and pulled the dagger out of his chest. My blood curdled as his skin released the dagger, oozing out a red fountain. My stomach clenched, and I feared I would vomit right there next to the man. Slowly, I gathered my dress together and stood up once more. Wobbling ahead, I stopped briefly to hand Alaire the dagger. He accepted the weapon wordlessly, though his brows drew together as he bit the corner of his lip.
In a matter of minutes I was on my own again, being able to glance at Alaire once more before he was hidden by the wheat that remained in the field. Though it was early morning, my feet were stinging each time I took a step. Sweat slowly dripped down my back, but I continued on all the same. There was no outline of the city, nothing for me to look at and approximate if I was any closer. As I advanced, there were more overgrown patches of weeds than anything else. The dirt was powdered, though the wind offered a slight breeze. With the sun shining down on me, it was probably the only reason to keep my eyes open.
My lips felt dry, cracking at the corners. A puddle of sweat formed above my upper lip, occasionally dripping down my chin if I did not smear it away. If I was already feeling such a drain of energy, how much longer could I continue on? Despite those thoughts, I forced myself to follow through. Alaire was relying on me to find Grefin, and I could not bear the thought of failing him. He hadn’t left my side through the nightmares and unexplainable appearances of Dyanna, and I in return would not leave him.
With each step, I desired that much more to return to Alaire’s side. By now, though, it felt like I was a thousand miles away from him. I knew the field could not stretch out forever, but it seemed that way. I yearned for a taste of water, but it could be hours before I had any.
No, focus! I criticized myself.
However, my legs burned like fire as if they would fall from my body at any given time. The pulsating pain in my head was no better while I carried on, struggling to stop myself from looking back in hope that Alaire would be nearby. He was nowhere in sight either, and all I had to hold onto was the
hope that if it was him walking through this field he would not forfeit.
As if that were some kind of trigger, I suddenly heard a noise that I had not heard in the longest time. A child’s laugh. With that, it felt like all the energy had been thrust back into my body. I ran toward the sound, noticing the outline of trees and buildings as I approached, and at last saw a child. It was a little boy who stood at the end of the field, laughing gleefully at the blue jay he was feeding. I bent over with my hands on my knees, panting like a dog while I watched. The sun was lower in the sky by now, though still beaming as bright as ever.
The bird allowed the boy to come close, but when he tried to pet it, the creature flew up into the sky. I watched the bird fly away and then looked at the child as he pouted.
“Bird,” he whimpered.
I frowned, trying to think of something I could say to him. Before I was given time to do so, a woman came and picked him up.
“Do not cry, darling. The bird will come back; he always does,” she said. She stared at me, and I dared not to look down at myself. I surely appeared as if I had jumped into a dirty river.
“I beg your pardon. Might you know where Grefin lives?” I asked.
She raised her eyebrow and then said, “If I did not know Grefin’s house, I would be the first. He lives in a manor located in the east side of Mergental.”
“How much further do I need to walk?” I replied. While I was in the city, I did not know my way about and could not afford to waste precious time.
“Not far, this is the outskirts of the city.” She glanced at her child, who could not be any older than five. “I can show you the way if you are in a hurry. Surely you must be…”
I nodded, assuming she was referring to my dirty clothes. “I would be grateful if you could take me there.”
The woman smiled at me. Her child clung onto the thin necklace around her neck. The piece of jewelry touched her beige dress. I began twirling Alaire’s ring on my finger as she led me into the city. Instantly I felt overwhelmed; I had never seen so many people in my life before.
There were people everywhere. Some of them stood by large wooden carts full of fabrics, foods, jewelry, or anything else of value. Those who were not selling material were moving through the streets. Horses were tied to poles, while children ran and played various games. As I walked past the locals, I tried to keep my jaw from dropping. It seemed there were more houses than anything else. In awe of the scenery, I stared at the large houses, small hovels, and happy families.
A manor came into sight at last, and then the woman said it was Grefin’s home. She left, wishing me luck, and then for the longest time I stood at the door. Alaire had told me Grefin was wealthy, but I had not thought it would be easy to find him. The woman who had led me there was an ordinary local. What had made Grefin well-known? Who was he and why had Alaire insisted we go to him?
Shaking my head, I reminded myself the reality of the situation and rapped on the door. A short, plump woman opened it. Her black hair was loose underneath the bonnet on her head, and her blistered hands told the story of loyal service as a maid.
“I’ve come on the behalf of Alaire Sencler. We sent his horse, but this is an urgent matter. I must see Grefin,” I said.
“Come in,” she said. The maid stood back as I squeezed past her, hearing children singing a song before I was inside. When I stood in the middle of the room I realized it was much larger than anything I could have imagined.
The furniture was dark but elegant; the rugs were made of real fur. A chandelier hung from the ceiling. There were paintings, and I noticed a mural on the wall to my right.
“I will announce your arrival to the master. Please make yourself at home, and there’s a glass of water on the table there if you’re thirsty,” the maid said, gesturing toward a chair. She walked through the doorway to the next room, and I was left alone.
There was a small table by the chair with the water the maid had spoken of, and I gulped it down hastily. As soon as the water was gone, I clenched my fists together and couldn’t bear the thought of sitting. Instead, I walked over to the mural. I was instantly intrigued by its exquisiteness, having never seen anything like it. In the mural there was a young man. He stood with his hands extended to a dragon flying in the sky. A blue light shot up at the gray mystical creature. In the background was a small town, and to its right was a field, to the left was a hill. On top of the hill a blue-cloaked woman stood with her hand extended. She stared up into the night’s sky, and a great blue light beamed down on her.
“Mistress?” The maid called.
I turned around, having entirely forgotten about her. I hadn’t expected to have lost my attention to a painting, and my cheeks were heated.
“Grefin is ready to see you.”
When she walked out of the doorway, I saw a man behind her. I was barely able to look at his face because the white gem on the collar of his coat was unmistakable. It was a gem I had heard about before, and one all Dark magicians avoided. The small piece of jewelry was worth more than any value in money. I couldn’t place what exactly it meant, but I remembered Dyanna warned me about it when we lived together.
“Watch out for a man wearing a white gem. Always remember, he is the highest-ranking White magician and your worst enemy,” she had said.
“You came for Alaire?” Grefin asked.
My jaw hung open, and I continued to stare at the glimmering gem. My words were stuck in my throat.
I’ll be damned… he’s a White magician, I thought.
And Alaire… has he betrayed me?
Chapter Seventeen
If He is Watching
The uncanny silence grew between us. I forced my mouth shut, but I could not look away from the gem. The only explanation I had was that Alaire must have been in more pain then he led on to me to send me to a White magician’s healer for help. Either that or he must have made a terrible mistake. No matter which way I looked at it, I could feel the guilt returning, the one feeling Alaire said might never go away. After all this time, he hadn’t felt safe enough to tell me that he needed help, that this White magician would be our only chance for him to survive.
“Mistress, who are you? Did Alaire Sencler send you here?” Grefin asked.
“Who am I? Who are you? Alaire is dying and he sends me to you, of all people?” I shouted.
He pushed back his auburn hair. “You already know who I am. My name is Grefin DeVilly, and if you are Alaire’s friend you have nothing to agonize over. I am not only a magician, mistress; I am a doctor as well.”
My attention remained focused on the gem. Suddenly I remembered why Dyanna had warned me about men like Grefin. Magicians who were recognized by the King for their noble deeds were appointed with white gems. It was an honor for them, a gift to the locals, and a warning to Dark magicians that their enemy would serve the King. Anyone with a gem knew a great deal about magic and was talented beyond imagination. As for just how much talent they really had, no Dark magicians knew. They were the King’s “weapon” if need be.
“Yes, but this matter is urgent. Why would Alaire send me to you? We can’t trust you in times like these,” I said, holding my hands behind my back to hide my fists.
He stepped out in the foyer.
“Alaire and I met several years ago. We fought for hours until we were both gasping for air. Neither of us wanted to die that day, and eventually we both admitted it. I told him I’d make a deal; so long as he did not kill me, I would not reveal his whereabouts to my allies.”
While his story sounded reasonable, I had every intention of leaving to find someone else in the city that could help me. I had learned about Alaire during the time I had been with him. He seemed like a man who would finish a fight, whether it killed him or not. After seeing how ashamed he felt for Melodie slipping away from our fight, I found it hard to believe that he would allow Grefin off so easily with the mention of a deal.
“I don’t have time for this,” I said, sighin
g, “so I’ll need you to call for your healer. Alaire’s life is in danger the longer I waste asking you questions.”
“Irene, find Daciana!” he called out to his maid who had remained by the doorway.
Once she walked away, Grefin returned his focus to me. He scratched at his thick beard.
“Now tell me what Alaire’s injuries are. His horse arrived here late this morning, but it was impossible to determine where he had come from. It’s very unusual for Vinur to arrive without Alaire,” he explained.
“We were traveling to visit you; Alaire said he needed to see you. As we were riding through the field before here, something frightened Vinur, and then he kicked us off. Since then Alaire’s knee has looked terribly bruised, making it difficult for him to walk. I fear something is wrong with him,” I said.
Grefin nodded and began approaching the stairwell to the right.
“Sir!” I yelled. “Will you not help me? Alaire begged me to come here, and now he’s alone out in the field. Something could hurt him. Please!”
Just as his hand touched the railing of the staircase, Grefin turned around and said, “If he’s fallen, his leg may have twisted. I’ll need to fetch supplies before I can treat him.”
“We don’t have time! A magician attacked us while we were in the field, and I can’t risk that happening again while Alaire is on his own. This. Cannot. Wait.” I spoke the last three words as slowly as possible. It seemed like Grefin would take his own precious time to seek out Alaire. All I wanted was for Alaire to be safe, for him to make it through this. I had been to doctors before, but the injuries had always been minor. Now that it could be between life and death, I feared I hadn’t gotten my point across.
“No, I understand perfectly, but neither you nor I will be of any help if we rush outside. If Alaire’s leg is broken, I’ll need materials to mend him. If something else got to him while you’ve been yelling at me, I’ll need materials. Alaire’s stronger than you think. Now are you going to help me or stand there and whine?” Grefin asked. He continued up the stairwell, not bothering to glance back.
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