by Fox, Natalie
Her eyes narrowed as she pulled back from him, angry and hurt and, as always, confused by his actions. ‘What was that—more punishment for me?’
‘Who is punishing whom isn’t too clear at the moment,’ he said harshly. ‘Let’s take a rain check on revenge for the time being and get back to what we are both here in this building for: business.’
With that he turned on his heel, and was about to sweep out of the room, leaving her standing in the middle of the floor, small and ineffectual, insignificant, in fact, when a last plaintive cry came from her tortured lips, his name echoing in the stillness of the vast room.
He turned and fixed his hard gaze on her, shoulders stiff with pent-up tension as he waited in the doorway to hear what she had to say.
A part of her cried out that it was too late, but the soft, vulnerable side of her urged the words to her pale lips nevertheless.
‘J-just one more thing, Mel,’ she whispered. ‘I never stopped loving you in those four years apart. I never stopped regretting what happened that night. You were my first love, my only love, and the very worst thing of all is that I still love you. I don’t want to because it isn’t a pleasure to feel this way, but I do love you. I shall have to live with that but…but I just wanted you to know, now, like this, because I know it’ s all impossible. There is no hope for us. Hope for my company maybe but nothing for me and you.’
She held his gaze long enough to convince herself that he was not going to allow any reaction to her words to show in the still hard gaze he was bestowing on her. She didn’t even regret her heartfelt admission. Perhaps she could draw strength from it, knowing that she had done and said everything that was true to her and there was nothing left inside her that he didn’t know about. But for the moment she just felt a deep numbness.
Mel said nothing. Mel showed nothing. No feeling, nothing. He held her gaze for another agonising minute and then he turned away from her and went out the door.
Jade stood for a while, staring blindly at the space where he had been standing. The numbness inside her was good, not bad. She needed it. Slowly she smoothed down her jacket and bravely lifted her chin. She wasn’t insignificant after all. In spite of Mel Biaggio she was going to come out of this with her business pride on top, if nothing else.
Determinedly Jade went straight to the studio and made her peace with Nadia. Her apology came out automatically, the words spoken without any thought, but they must have been the right words because Nadia took it well enough for Jade to persuade her that with a few amendments the presentation could be put forward after all. To her credit Nadia was open to Jade’s suggestions and together they came up with something that was agreeable to both, keeping in mind Jade’s familiarity with Osbourne’s and Nadia’s flair and originality.
It was only when the session was over that Jade realised what it had cost her. She felt so completely drained that by the time she left Nadia and got to her own office she wasn’t fit to speak any more and her legs could hardly carry her inside to pick up her coat and bag and leave. She didn’t tell Diane where she was going and as far as she knew Diane hadn’t asked. Of Mel there was no sign.
Back at her apartment she soaked in the bath and read a letter from her father that had been waiting for her when she got in. She was still numb, the world locked out of her mind. Her father’s letter was a welcome distraction to lose herself in and so channel her thoughts in another direction. He said he was coming back to the UK next week and would she make sure the house was OK and he had some good news for her but would wait to tell her in person.
Perhaps he was going to marry Anita, she mused. And why not? Anita had mellowed him since they had taken up together three years back. He didn’t manipulate her as he manipulated everyone else in his life. Anita was strong-willed and very beautiful and very clever—a match for her father. Jade would be quite happy to see her father married at last but…but how ironic that he should have happiness when a few ill-chosen words from him had ruined his own daughter’s happiness. Oh, no, it was all coming back, the pain and the loss. She crumpled her father’s letter and flung it across the bathroom.
At that moment the security buzzer went.
‘All right, all right!’ Jade muttered impatiently, slopping out of the bath and struggling into her old towelling bathrobe.
‘Jade? It’s Mel. Can I come in?’ came the disembodied voice over the intercom.
‘Mel?’ she breathed. Oh, why couldn’t he leave her alone? Had Nadia gone behind her back and complained bitterly about the amendments to the presentation and now he’d come to tear her off another strip?
She opened the apartment door to him, barefoot, warm and damp and feeling at a distinct disadvantage in her worn old robe belted tightly around her tiny waist. Her stomach was tight with tension and she willed her old friend, numbness, to make an appearance.
He strode across the threshold without making any comment and with a deep sigh Jade closed the door after him. He was still dressed in his navy suit so he must have come straight from the office.
She raked her tousled hair from her forehead impatiently. ‘What do you want, Mel?’
‘Bin bag. Do you possess such a thing?’ He wrenched at a cupboard under the sink, nearly pulling it off its hinges. ‘Found one!’
Astonished, Jade watched him flick out the bag as he crossed the living area. ‘Mel, what the devil are you doing?’ she cried.
‘Something I should have done a long time ago—exorcising Nicholas Fields from our lives instead of punishing us.’ He strode into the spare bedroom, flung open the wardrobe and started stuffing Nicholas’s suits and jackets into the bag. Jade stood in the doorway, gazing at him wildly.
‘Mel! What the hell are you doing?’ she repeated hoarsely.
He swung on her, all dark Mediterranean anger, and his index finger came up, rooting her to the spot. ‘If you argue with me I leave, Jade. This is the only way I can deal with this.’
Jade’s heart thudded nervously. Throwing Nicholas’s clothes out? I don’t understand. What sort of a way is that, and a way to what? What are you talking about?’
‘Our future, our life together,’ he told her in clipped tones.
Jade’s heart started to race. She was dazed with shock. Their future? This was all to do with their future? Confused, she stepped right into the room. Mel moved to the chest of drawers and pulled them open, stuffing the contents into the bag.
‘I’ve been a fool, Jade. I’ve allowed my jealousy to spoil it all and this is the only way I can deal with it,’ he grated as he worked. ‘I’ve allowed this and this—’ he threw ties and socks into the bag ‘—to twist my reasoning till I’m half-crazed with it.’ He stopped suddenly and looked at her stricken features and his whole body seemed to sag.
And suddenly Jade knew what was happening and a great gush of relief flooded her till she felt dizzy with happiness. Now she understood, oh, how she understood, and it was the most wonderful feeling. This was his way—the only way he could come to terms with it all.
‘Don’t try and stop me, Jade,’ he warned as she came and stood beside him, tugging the bag from his hand and letting it drop to the floor.
Jade leaned her head against his shoulder and clung to his arm. ‘Oh, I’m not going to stop you, darling,’ she murmured. ‘I might even help you when I get my breath back.’ She smiled, looking up into his drawn face.
Suddenly she was in his arms and they were clinging to each other.
‘Can you ever forgive me, darling?’ he breathed emotionally into her hair. ‘Blame my jealousy, blame anything, but forgive me. I can’t live with myself if you don’t. It tore at my very soul to hear you opening your heart to me in the studio. You thought you’d lost it all and yet in your pain you couldn’t help telling me how much you loved me and always had. I couldn’t take it all in, not then. I was so shocked, riddled with guilt, felt such a bastard for what I’d done to you. I had to walk away, get out of your sight because what you’d said had brought h
ome to me just how deeply I had hurt you.’
‘Oh, Mel,’ she groaned, lifting her flushed face to look at him. ‘I told you I couldn’t cope any more and—’
‘I know, darling, and I can’t cope any longer without you. I had to come and rid myself of all that was tormenting me. You living with this Nicholas and—’
She lifted her fingers to his lips, to still the mention of him, and as the tension drained from Mel’s face she linked her arms around his neck and tenderly pulled him down to her waiting lips. It was over—the tension, the pain, the exhausting emotional turmoil of loving him and losing him again and again. Mel was with her, wanting a future with her, loving her and wanting her forgiveness. And this was her forgiveness, her kiss of love and tenderness—all that needed to be said in the best way she knew.
He wrapped his arms around her and it was like a vice of sweet possession. His mouth was in her hair, his mur-murings incoherent amidst the rush of blood to her head. Then he drew back, lifted her and carried her through to her own room where he deposited her at the foot of the bed. His eyes were dark and predatory as he tugged at the belt of her robe. A small smile tipped the corners of his sensuous mouth.
‘What a deplorable robe,’ he teased softly.
‘It’s had its day,’ she murmured, lifting her hands to smooth them down the sides of his face.
‘It’s had its night too.’ One last small tug and the belt was free and the robe gaped open, revealing her warm, scented, wanting flesh.
Mel scooped her against him, and rubbed his cheek gently against hers, whispering, ‘I’m going to love you for ever, my pocket-sized princess.’
Jade thought her heart would burst with happiness as he lifted her again and set her down on the bed. She knelt up to help him shed his clothes. Her hands smoothed over him, anxious with need, her heart pulsing with love. Her measure of happiness couldn’t be excelled, his measure of need was as glorious as ever.
Urgency took precedence, as if they were afraid the outside world would encroach at any time and snatch the moment of bonding passion from them. The rush of kisses and tormented caresses drove them harder and swifter till they were on the brink of ecstasy.
Jade closed around him as he entered her. They were so perfect together, made for each other, and they always had been. He held himself above her, watching her face as he penetrated her so completely that she bit hard on her lower lip. They gazed in wonder at each other, relishing the power of feeling that swept over them as their lower bodies surged against each other…long, silky thrusts, quickening slightly, exquisite shafts of sensuality that fired their whole bodies till the heat nearly engulfed them.
Jade let out small moans of pleasure and moved with him, grasping him to her, squeezing her eyes tight shut because his passion was so incredibly erotic. Higher they rose, out of body, beyond anything that was real. Then came a pulsing, throbbing rush of liquid power and then the ballooning of fluid gold inside, Mel still thrusting inside her, bringing her down and down, hot and floaty, blanketed in love and security.
They lay together, locked in each other’s arms, too sated and languid to speak yet. Later they would talk and make promises that never again would they be parted. Mel mouthed kisses against her cheek and ran a warm hand over her burning breasts and Jade wanted the world to end because nothing could ever be better than this.
Jade was the first to hear the small, familiar sound of a key in the lock. Her heart faltered and almost stopped and then she relaxed against the weight of Mel’s body. Mel was sleeping peacefully. He had dealt with this, come to terms with his destructive jealousy, and there was nothing to fear now. But this wasn’t exactly the right time for him to meet Nicholas and carefully she slid out of bed and slipped on her robe.
She would have to tell Nicholas everything and he would have to leave the apartment, of course. She knew he would understand. He’d probably be horribly mortified that he had inadvertently been the cause of so much trouble.
Nicholas was slumped on the sofa in the living room, eyes closed, looking pale and as exhausted as usual. Jade smiled and ruffled his hair as she passed. Trisha would sort him out once they were married. He worked and travelled far too much.
‘I see you’re not too tired to have poured yourself a drink.’ She smiled down at him.
Nicholas lifted the whisky to his lips and drained the measure. Then he opened his eyes and looked at Jade, who had perched herself on the arm of the sofa next to him.
Perhaps now wasn’t exactly the right time to tell him all his clothes were bundled into a bag in his bedroom. Poor Nicholas; he’d never, ever done anything wrong. Mel knew that now and perhaps they could be friends one day. ‘What’s wrong?’ she asked. Nicholas didn’t look at all well. He looked as if he’d had a few before the one in his hand.
‘I’m sorry, Jade,’ he moaned. He reached for her hand and gripped it. ‘I wish to hell I’d never suggested him. I blame myself—’
‘Mel—Mel Biaggio?’ Jade breathed, and then grinned at Nicholas. He’d always been worried about Mel, worried that he’d gone beyond the call of duty with the company for some ulterior motive. ‘He’s here,’ she told him gently. ‘Sleeping at the moment.’
‘Good God!’ Nicholas grated, and tried to get up, but Jade stilled him with one hand.
‘It’s OK, Nicholas. I’ve loads to tell you. It’s a long story but, well, he’s here and—’ she sighed happily ‘—well, he’s just here.’ Where to begin to explain? she wondered.
Nicholas’s eyes flew over her robe and took in the contented flush of her face and in a shock of realisation he shot to his feet, staggering with the force of his own movement as if he’d no control over it. Miraculously, however, he managed to hold onto the crystal-cut glass tumbler containing the remainder of his whisky.
And then Nicholas wasn’t gaping at her any more but was looking beyond her, over her shoulder, to the door that led to the inner hallway and the bedrooms. Jade turned, knowing Mel would be standing there. He was. Dressed, shirt open at the neck and tieless. Tall and powerful, seeming twice the height and width of Nicholas in his charcoal-grey suit.
Jade would rather their first meeting had been on more neutral ground but she hadn’t known Nicholas was going to be in town this evening and of course she hadn’t known Mel was coming round…Anyway it had happened. She opened her mouth to hurry out the introductions, acutely aware that the two men were eyeing each other warily, Nicholas slightly the worse for drink and Mel somewhat pale yet with a steely determination about him that suggested to Jade he was controlling his feelings and trying to come to terms with meeting the source of his past jealousy.
‘Mel, this is—’
She didn’t finish. There was a muted roar from…from Nicholas? In disbelief Jade watched as Nicholas lurched forward towards Mel, the movement, to Jade’s frenzied wide eyes, seeming to happen in slow motion. Nicholas, wild with fury, lurching at Mel.
‘You bastard! You thieving bastard!’
His fist came back and Jade shrieked in alarm and flew across the room. Mel stood his ground, so coldly impassive that Jade wondered if he knew what was happening. Nicholas was going to punch him! It was impossible. Surely if any punches were going to be landed Mel was the one to have cause to throw them?
Nicholas punched the air as, with only the slightest of movements, Mel avoided the blow. The impact of Nicholas’s fist on the yielding air couldn’t have shocked him more if it had landed on Mel’s unyielding jawline. He lurched, stumbled, nearly overbalanced completely, and would have done if Mel hadn’t hauled him up by his collar. He swung him around and with one powerful hand pinned him against the wall next to the microwave, his other hand clenched in readiness to defend himself should Nicholas chance another punch at him.
‘What the hell do you think you’re doing?’ he grated roughly, almost shaking Nicholas to tumble a reason from his white lips.
‘Leave him, Mel,’ Jade said quickly. Poor Nicholas looked as if he was going to choke.
‘I’ll leave him when he tells me what this is about.’
‘As if you didn’t bloody know,’ Nicholas grazed.
‘Nicholas, what’s wrong?’ Jade pleaded. She hadn’t a clue what was going on here. Why on earth was Nicholas so mad with Mel?
Nicholas glared at Mel with fury but directed his words at Jade. ‘He hasn’t told you, has he?’
‘Told me what?’ Jade asked in amazement. These two didn’t know each other and yet it was she who was feeling out of it, as if she wasn’t a part of what was going on.
Suddenly Mel let Nicholas go and Nicholas sagged against the wall. He was still defying Mel with his eyes as he straightened his tie at his throat and then somewhat nervously smoothed his hands down his suit jacket.
Mel stood impassive before him, his threatening presence enough to quell any more fury that might have erupted from Nicholas. He didn’t speak a word and somehow his ominous silence caused fear to stab at Jade’s spine.
‘Please, what is it?’ she murmured nervously. Instinctively she felt that Mel knew what Nicholas was on about. ‘Tell me if it concerns me,’ she insisted. What was happening here?
‘You can’t tell her, can you?’ Nicholas challenged Mel, and Jade wondered if she was invisible. ‘You rotten, cheap, lousy—’
Mel’s hand shot out to grip his tie threateningly, his eyes dark with fury. He held onto Nicholas, the grip on him so debilitating that Nicholas couldn’t have uttered another insult if his life had depended on it.
“That’s enough from you,’ Mel breathed heavily, obviously winning the battle to hold onto his temper, but only just. Jade had never seen his face so white and taut. ‘If it comes from anyone it’ll come from me. I don’t want to know where you got your information from because I’ve got a good idea. There are only two people in the world who know, and since this is the first time we’ve met it can only have come from John Ritchie.’
