by Marie Meyer
As I talk to Vin’s daughter, it smacks me in the gut that he hasn’t gotten to hold her yet, to touch the soft skin on her face. Gabriella wiggles, stretching one of her arms out of the blanket. I look to Emily, concerned. “Is this okay? Does she need to be retucked?”
Emily laughs. “It’s fine. She wiggles out of the blanket all the time.”
Gabriella’s fist comes to her mouth and she sucks on it, lips smacking loudly.
“She’s hungry,” Ren says, standing over my shoulder.
I look up to see Ren smiling down at Gabriella. Reaching over me, she puts her finger to the little notch in baby’s chin. “Hungry, yes. I know.”
Ren has got the baby talk down. Her voice is squeaky and high pitched and cute as hell. Gabriella’s eyes zero in on Ren’s like she cast a magic spell over her. Ren is a natural with babies.
It’s her job, idiot. The voice in my head, so kindly reminds. Even still, she’s going to make a hell of a mother someday.
“Well, I hate to leave this little party, but I am on the clock,” Ren says, squeezing my shoulders. “I’ll talk to you later, Cayden? I know you’re taking your mom to her appointment later. Let me know how that goes.”
I hand Gabriella back to her mother. “I should go, too.”
“Cayden, it was so lovely to see you, please don’t be a stranger. Come by the house whenever you like. I know it’d make Vince happy.”
“I will.” I lean down and kiss her cheek. “She’s amazing, Emily.” I touch Gabriella’s cherubic face one more time.
“Emily,” Ren says, “do you need any help feeding Gabriella? I can have the lactation consultant step in to assist you.”
“I’ll try it myself this time, since we don’t have an audience. See how it goes. If I need help, I’ll hit the call button.”
“Perfect. Let me know if you two need anything.”
“Will do, Ren. Thank you,” Emily says.
Ren moves toward the door. I give Emily a wave and follow Ren out the door. In the hallway, she glances to the left, then to the right. “Let’s go to the break room,” she says, tipping her head toward the long corridor behind me.
Walking at her side, it’s so hard not to grab her hand and hold it, but I know she’s at work. I respect that professional line.
“What an awesome surprise, getting to see you.” She glances up at me, beaming.
“I had hoped I’d get to see you.”
We stop and she opens the door to a room that’s practically a closet, with a small sofa, refrigerator, and a microwave, nothing else. Ren closes the door behind us and turns, wrapping her arms around my neck. Her lips are on mine, slow and sweet. “God, I’ve missed you,” she sighs, leaning into me.
My arms are around her in seconds, loving how all of her round soft curves mold to my hard edges. “Fuck, yes,” I moan in agreement.
“I can’t be gone long; I’m not on break, but I had to see you.” Her tongue licks across my lips, hesitant…teasing.
“I will take every minute I get.” Sucking her bottom lip into my mouth, I push the limits of how much I can take while she’s at work, my tongue brushing against hers.
So many inappropriate thoughts crowd my head—locking the door, throwing her on that tiny sofa, stripping her naked, and having my way with her, just to list a few.
“You sure it’s not break time?”
“I’m sure,” she mumbles against my lips and pulls away.
Dammit!
Frowning, she shakes her head. “I really need to go. But damn am I glad you had a reason to be at the hospital. Got any more friends who are having babies? I could get used to seeing you around here, Officer.” She runs a finger over my lips.
Fuck. I love when she calls me “officer.” I grab her wrist, sucking her finger into my mouth and biting it between my teeth. “God, I want you right now,” I growl.
She swallows, her eyes wide. “I want you, too.” She pulls her finger from my mouth with a pop. “But, I have to go.”
“Fuck.” I nod, brushing my knuckles over her soft cheeks, trying to ease the wanting, pained expression on her face.
“Let me know how your mom’s appointment goes this afternoon,” she says.
“I will.”
“Don’t forget, I told Lexie and Shae that I would go out with them tonight. Lexie was pretty adamant that I go.”
“I remember. I don’t know what Lacey is up to tonight, so I might have to stay with Mom.”
“Keep me posted.”
“Will do.” Leaning in, I kiss her one more time, needing one more taste.
Before we get carried away again, Ren steps back and opens the break room door, and together we slip out undetected. No one the wiser to our impromptu make-out session.
On my way out of the hospital, I smile, brushing a finger over my lips. Ren, kissing, babies. So many thoughts swirl in my head, but my most favorite: family.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Ren
Trading my Minnie Mouse scrubs for a short black cocktail dress, I head out the door to meet Lexie and Shae. Walking to my car, I shoot Lexie a text, Be there in a few.
Her response is immediate. Can’t party without you. Hurry up!
I also text Cayden. How is your mom? Please call me. I’m worried. His mother’s appointment was hours ago. Why hasn’t he called?
Sighing, I toss my phone in my purse, and yank out my keys. Clicking the button on my keychain, my Miata flashes its lights in greeting.
The short drive to Belle’s—the hole in the wall bar that was our hangout in college—is uneventful, as I keep my lead foot from leaning too far on the gas pedal. After paying that last ticket, I don’t need to get busted again…unless it means Cayden would be the one doing the busting. The thought crosses my mind for a split second and then I remember I don’t have a spare hundred dollars lying around.
There’s always a chance he’ll get you off with a warning. My conscience waggles her eyebrows seductively. I have sex with Cayden once, and it’s all I can think about it. But, it is nice to enjoy sex again.
Pulling into the parking lot, I notice Shae’s Acura parked in the front row. My late arrival means that I’ll be parking in the back.
Finding a well-lit space, I lock my car and head inside.
Belle’s is hopping tonight. Scanning the bar, I see Lexie near the back, waving her hands above her head. “Ren! Over here!” she shouts.
I weave through the high-top tables and sidle up to the one occupied by two of my best friends. These ladies have been with me through thick and thin.
Lexie’s long blond hair sweeps over her shoulders and down her back in gorgeous messy beach curls. Standing up, she holds her arms out to me. “You made it!” she squeals, folding me into a hug.
“Ugh. I didn’t think I was ever going to get out of work. I had an emergency C-section right at the end of my shift.”
Shae screws her face up, wrinkling her nose. “I don’t know how you stand to watch that.” She pretends to shiver and takes a long pull on her beer.
“It’s certainly not as glamorous as CPA life.” I nudge her with my shoulder and plop onto the stool next to her.
“I never have to worry about my calculator peeing, pooping, bleeding, or vomiting all over me, thank you very much. How’s the saying go…‘there is safety in numbers’? Yes, there is.”
I shake my head. “Oh, Shae. You are too prissy for your own good.” I laugh.
“What’ll you have, sweetheart?”
At the sound of a low rumbling voice behind me, I turn around. Looming over me, the waiter stands ready to take my order. He’s kind of cute, resembling Clark Kent with his black-framed glasses and neatly styled hair.
“I’ll take a Coors Light. And my name’s not ‘sweetheart.’” There’s only one man in this world that gets to call me that.
“Got it. One Silver Bullet coming up.” He salutes and with a wink he heads to the bar.
“So, what’s new, ladies?” I ask, folding my
hands on the table.
Lexie bites an olive off the plastic sword garnishing her martini, smirking and holding her hand at a really awkward angle. Why the hell is she doing that?
“What is that look, Lex? You okay?”
“Go on, Lexie, tell her,” Shae prods.
My gaze passes between the two of them. “Tell me what?” Then I see it, the massive sparkling rock on Lexi’s left finger. That explains the awkward hand position, an attempt to get me to notice her bejeweled left hand.
“Holy shit. When did this happen?” I snatch her hand off the plastic sword and examine her new bling. “Lex!” I turn my attention back to her, eyes wide.
“Friday night.”
“And I didn’t get a single Snapchat?” I cock my head and stare at her.
Shae bumps Lexie with her shoulder. “She and Ollie have been locked in the bedroom for the last two days.”
My cheeks warm at the thought of being locked in Cayden’s room for two days.
Lexie shrugs with a smug grin, casting her baby blue eyes on each of us. “We had some celebrating to do.”
The waiter returns, setting my beer in front of me. “One Coors Light.”
“Thank you.” I nod.
Putting the bottle to my lips, I take a long drink. “Ahhh, now that’s good.” I sigh, swallowing. “Lex, we need details,” I demand, setting my bottle down with a thud.
“Um…I don’t think we need those details, Ren. I do not want to know what kind of kinky, Fifty Shades shit Lex and Ollie are into.”
I roll my eyes. Sometimes my friends are so dense. “Not that. How did he propose?”
Lexie chews on the end of the plastic sword, smiling. “We were at the baseball game. The jumbotron caught the whole thing during the seventh inning stretch.”
“Oooh, look at Oliver busting out the moves,” I croon. “Nice.”
“Ahh! I still can’t believe it!” Lexie shuffles her feet under the table. “It was so cool!”
Shae chimes in, “You know Ollie’s a keeper when a Cubs fan, purposes to his diehard Cardinal-loving girlfriend, at a Cubs versus Cards game, at Busch Stadium.”
“And the Cards won,” Lexie adds. “Our union is blessed by the baseball gods.”
“Not sure Oliver would agree with that,” I say, taking a drink.
“Psssh”—Shae waves her hand—“Lexie has got that man so whipped.”
I don’t know if that’s the right adjective; I wouldn’t say Oliver is whipped, but is he in love? Yes. I’ve seen the way he watches Lexie, like the stars rise and fall in her eyes.
Shae vacuums up the dregs of her fruity drink with her straw. “What about you, Ren, what have you been up to? I saw you getting cozy with fine piece of man at Dyl’s wedding. The one that promised me a dance, but never came through. What’s his name? Chris?”
I shake my head and swallow the last of my beer. “Cayden.”
“Caaaayden,” Shae drawls. “Sexy.” Her shoulders dip suggestively. “And to think, I could have had him draped over me all night. So sad,” she says, pouting.
Damn straight he’s sexy! And I’m not sharing. My heart thumps out an extra beat.
“How are we doing, ladies?” the waiter asks, stepping up to the table. “Another round?”
We glance around the table, each of us giving a silent nod. God, I’ve missed my friends. “What the hell,” I say, “let’s do it.”
“Awesome. I’ll get those right out.” He slaps the table with a stack of menus, flashes a smile, and turns to leave.
“Okay, spill it, Ren. What’s up with you and Cayden?” Lexie asks.
What’s up with Cayden? I know what’s up! I laugh inwardly. I’ve never been one to kiss and tell; it’s not my thing. But, I do want Lexie and Shae to know how happy I am. Only my family and Dylen know what happened three years ago, but Shae and Lexie are aware that I haven’t dated or even hinted at wanting a relationship with the member of the opposite sex in years. So, the fact that I spent any time with Cayden at Dylen’s wedding is enough to pique their interest.
I bite my tongue between my teeth, fighting an impish grin and schoolgirl giggles. I nod. “We’ve been seeing each other.” A lot of each other!
“Oooooh!” they say in unison.
“How much of each other?” Shae’s lilting voice teases.
“Enough.” I’m not sharing any more beyond that. I don’t want to jinx anything by speaking it out loud.
Aren’t you jinxed anyway? Doomed? Once he finds out you’re broken, he’s going to dump your ass. Enjoy it while you can, sweetheart.
“Enough? What kind of freaking answer is that?” Lexie chides.
“Here we go, ladies,” the waiter says, returning with a tray balanced at his side. “A Coors for you.” He sets the bottle down in front of me.
“Thank you.”
“No problem, love.” He picks up the next drink, depositing it in front of Shae. “A strawberry daiquiri, aaaaanndd a dirty martini.” He sets Lexie’s drink on the table.
“Thank you,” she says, picking up the black plastic sword.
“You bet. I’ll check back in a bit.” And he’s off to the next table.
“Dude, he was totally flirting with you, Ren,” Lexie says, smirking, popping an olive into her mouth.
I cock my head. “Yeah, right.”
Shae kicks my chair, her eyebrow pulling up. “He didn’t call the rest of us, ‘love.’”
“Whatever. You two are full of it.” I reach for my beer, my cheeks burning. I press the mouth of the bottle to my lips and take a swallow, hearing my phone ring in my purse.
Setting my beer on the table, I unzip my purse, and pull my phone out: Officer Sinclair is lighting up the screen. Can a heart smile? Yes, yes it can, because mine just did. I accept the call and my heart flares, sending a warm glow cascading through my body. God, I miss him.
“Cayden?”
“Ren”—his voice is rough, gravelly—“can you come over?” he asks, a desperate heaviness strangling his words.
Worry bitch slaps the smile off my heart. “What’s wrong?”
“I just need…” His voice trails off.
Lexie taps me on the arm. “Everything okay?”
I cup a hand over the receiver and pull it away from my mouth, whispering, “I don’t think so. I’m going to take this outside.”
Lexie and Shae give concerned looks and nod while I stand, headed for the exit. “What’s wrong?”
Silence.
My pulse quickens. This is not like him.
“My mom’s not well.” Fear paints his voice black.
“I’m on my way.” I pull the door to Belle’s open and march back inside. “I’ll be there in in a few.”
The call ends. No “goodbye,” no “see you soon,” only silence. Not good. Sooo not good.
I fling the door open and run back to the table. Snatching my purse from my chair, I shove my phone inside. “I’ve got to go. Something’s wrong.”
Lexie and Shae look to one another, nodding in understanding. “No, go. We’ve got this,” Shae says, waving me away.
My once smiling heart sags like an old lady’s jowls. “Thanks, guys.” I pull each of them into a quick hug. “Love you. I’ll keep you posted.” I toss a twenty on the table and call over my shoulder as I leave. “For my drinks. Thanks, loves.”
Keys in hand, I race out of Belle’s, my heart in my throat. I’ve never heard Cayden like this. Sorry, Cayden, I’m going to speed.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Cayden
I set the nearly empty bottle of bourbon on the table and peel my ass off the couch, stumbling toward the door. A jackhammer pulverizes my skull. Knowing Ren is on the other side is the only thing that keeps me upright.
Ren is on the other side…
Each step, I’m closer to her.
Ren is on the other side…
Ren is on the other side…
One more fucking step…
Ren is…
I yank the door open.
Here.
The jackhammer quiets.
“Jesus, Cayden. Are you all right?” she gasps, stepping over the threshold.
A shot goes off in my head. The first shot of a war. I war to hold her, make love to her, kiss her, cry on her shoulder, fuck her, and collapse in a heap of tears in her arms. My body sways, pelted with the shrapnel of Mom’s cancer.
“Ren.” Thank fucking God her name is one syllable, because that’s all I can grind out.
She slips her hand on my shoulder and pushes past me with the gentleness of an angel. I know she’s been sent here to save me. I’m not the superhero, she is. I watch her glide across the room in blurred slow motion and the jackhammer resumes it’s excavation at the crown of my head. My skull is about open.
“Cayden”—she pats the cushion beside her—“come sit.” Her voice is soft and sweet, like Mom’s homemade cinnamon rolls, icing melting into the swirling crevices.
Mom.
I’m not drunk enough. The oncologist’s voice…still a spike driving through my head, piercing my heart. Terminal.
Ren, like a tractor beam, pulls me toward her. I drag my heavy feet across the carpet, flopping onto the cushion. Draping her arm over my shoulder, I collapse against her, my head falling into her lap.
“Oh, Cayden”—her voice soft as a cloud—“what happened?” With the lightest touch, she brushes her hands gently over my close-cropped scalp.
My muscles yield to her touch, uncoiling like frayed yarn. The tension in my neck and back release, and I exhale for what seems like the first time since I dropped Mom off at home.
“Mom went to the doctor today,” I mumble, focusing on her touch; the lazy path of her fingers traveling through my hair. Forward and back. Forward and back…. “Not good.”
Between Ren’s fingers and the bourbon, I’m almost numb.
“I’m here. You can talk to me,” she whispers.
My brain clicks over the words, forcing them into a coherent response. “Treatment’s not working.”
“Did the doctors suggest another treatment? There are so many experimental options available.”
