Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Only one life, yes only one,
Now let me say, “Thy will be done”;
And when at last I’ll hear the call,
I know I’ll say “twas worth it all”;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.”
Maya was mesmerized by the sound of Dalton’s voice as he recited the poem in a way that brought the words to life. They flowed effortlessly from him with a cadence that drew her in and—by the looks of the people around her—she wasn’t the only one so affected.
As Dalton returned to his seat and the pastor came back to stand behind the podium, Maya found the words echoing in her mind, and she planned to google the poem for herself when she got home later.
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.
The service ended with a prayer and a song, and then they were filing out of the sanctuary. Maya knew that Gabe was most likely going to ask her if she wanted to join them for dinner following the service, but she was going to decline. After what had happened between them the night before and then listening to the pastor’s words, Maya felt like she needed a little space.
The poem Dalton had read had been a strong reminder that she really did only have one life. And it was a life that she had fought hard for. When the pain—the endless pain—had worn her down so low that she hadn’t known if she could find the strength to go on. When it had felt easier to just stop fighting. To stop the treatments. To let the cancer win. She’d somehow found the resolve to go on. To fight just one more day. And then another. Her life was precious to her. She loved her life and wanted to do something meaningful with it. What that was, she wasn’t sure yet, but more and more, she was coming to realise that it wasn’t being with a man who courted death with the same passion she’d fought to live.
Being close to Gabe weakened her resolve to not get in even deeper with him. The kiss—her first—the night before had already made her want to just chuck her resolution to take things slow, right out the window. So she wouldn’t go to dinner, and she would say goodbye to Gabe without the little bit of a meltdown like she’d had the previous night. He wasn’t going to stay, that much was clear, and there was no way she would beg him again.
When they reached the foyer, Gabe rested his hand on Maya’s back and guided her off to the side. He looked down at her with a smile that went right to his eyes, crinkling the skin at the corner of them. “Can you come for dinner at Mom and Dad’s?”
Maya shook her head. “I’m sorry. Not today.”
Disappointment dimmed the smile on Gabe’s face. “Are you sure?”
The pull was there to cave in, but she couldn’t. “No. I’m sorry.”
“Okay, guess this will be goodbye then?”
The knot tightened in Maya’s stomach. She didn’t want it to be goodbye. She didn’t want to think about what he was leaving to do. She didn’t want to think about what could possibly happen to him.
“I’m sure you’ll have a good time.” Maya hoped her smile looked steadier than it felt. “At least you’ll be warm!”
Gabe looked at her closely, his blue eyes serious, then nodded. “More like hot, and the humidity is usually really high.”
“Do you have trouble adjusting when you go from one extreme to the other?” Maya asked, finding it a bit ironic that they were discussing the weather.
“It can take a couple of days, but it usually isn’t a big factor.” Gabe paused then said, “I’m going to text you my social media information. Even if you don’t have social media yourself, you can still see the pictures and videos from the trip. But if you do set up an account on anything, be sure to follow or friend me.”
“Okay. I’ll do that. I might set up accounts even though I don’t really have a lot of people I want following my life.” Maya laughed. “I’m truly not that exciting.”
“Well, to some people you are. Post pictures of you on the climbing wall at the gym. That’s definitely exciting.”
“True,” Maya said then shrugged. “I’ll see.”
Gabe grinned at her. “You could post pictures of what you’re eating for breakfast, and I’d find it interesting.”
“I’ve managed to go this long without taking pictures of the food I eat, I think I’ll probably go a little while longer. But who knows, I might post one for you.”
“Well, that makes me feel special,” Gabe said, his eyes sparkling with laughter once again. “I’ll probably post some food pictures from Thailand since they have some great food over there.”
“Hey, Maya.”
Mitch’s greeting interrupted their conversation, and Maya saw a flash of irritation on Gabe’s face. “Hey, Mitch. How’s it going?”
“Going good.” When he smiled at her, Maya noticed how different Mitch’s smile looked from Gabe’s, and it certainly didn’t fill her with warmth the way his brother’s did. “Are you coming to dinner?”
“No, not today. Though I do appreciate the invitation.”
Gabe and Mitch exchanged a look that apparently contained enough conversation that Mitch turned back to her with a smile. “Well, I hope you have a good New Years. I’ll see you at work again later this week.”
“Happy New Year to you too,” Maya said with a smile. “I hope that you have a good holiday.”
Gabe watched his brother walk away then looked back at Maya. “I guess I should probably go home so I’m not late for dinner.” He paused and tilted his head with a small smile. “Are you sure you can’t come?”
“I’m sure,” Maya told him. “I need to get going too.”
“Then let’s get our coats, and I’ll walk you to your car.”
Gabe again placed his hand on her back, and Maya savored the feel of it—the connection between them seemed so strong even though they hadn’t known each other that long. It scared and intrigued her in equal measures. Which was why she needed to say goodbye and go home.
When Gabe held her coat, the thought that her mother would love that he had good manners crossed her mind and made her smile. As she buttoned up her coat, Gabe grabbed his own and pulled it on. The crowd in the foyer had thinned out, and the cars were lined up to exit the parking lot.
The wind blowing across the parking lot was frigid, so when Gabe offered her his elbow, she slid her gloved hand into the curve of his arm and buried her other hand in her pocket as they walked. Walking close to Gabe seemed to offer a little warmth, and Maya savored it, knowing it was going to be the last time with him for a little while…maybe forever if it seemed that his adventures were more important than she was.
When they reached her car, Gabe took her hands in his and squeezed them. “Take care of yourself.”
Maya smiled though she felt her lips quivering. “I think that’s my line for you.”
“I know,” Gabe said with a slight nod. “But I want you to take care of yourself too.”
He pulled her in for a hug, and Maya wrapped her arms around him, her hands grasping handfuls of his coat. She blinked rapidly, trying to keep the tears at bay. Why was she crying over this man she’d barely known for a month? It didn’t seem possible for her heart to ache the way it did at the thought of him leaving.
“I’ll see you again in a few weeks,” Gabe said as he stepped back. “So, we’re not saying goodbye, just…see you later.”
Maya nodded. “See you later.”
Gabe reached past her to open her door. “You need to get in out of the cold.”
Feeling sad at the thought of driving away from Gabe, Maya hesitated then slid behind the wheel. After she was seated, Gabe bent down and used his fingertips to turn her face toward him. He stared at her for a moment, then pressed a quick kiss to her lips. “See you later, beautiful.”
He straightened and closed the door, ending their moment of saying goodbye. Maya sat with her hands clenching the steering wheel and stared in her rea
r-view mirror, watching as Gabe walked to where his truck was parked. She closed her eyes, let out a long breath and then opened them up, blinking to clear the moisture that had gathered there.
She made the drive home in silence, not even turning on the radio. The tumult of emotion within her was nearly overwhelming her. She desperately needed someone to talk to, so as soon as she got home, she checked to see if Lainie was online. When she wasn’t, Maya changed out of her church clothes and pulled on a pair of leggings and a baggy sweatshirt. She went downstairs to see what she could find to eat for lunch.
There was no sign of her parents, but that didn’t mean they weren’t home. Her dad’s favorite spot in the house was his office, and her mom’s was the sunroom with her plants. Maya was just as happy to not have to see either of them so she didn’t have to explain why she wasn’t in a great mood.
After making a sandwich using the multigrain bread that Elisse had baked and some slices of chicken, tomatoes, and cheese, Maya headed back to her room. She ate her sandwich while sitting on her window seat, looking out over the snowy forest behind the house. When she was done, she leaned her head back against the window and closed her eyes.
What was she going to do about Gabe? Was there a way to get used to saying goodbye all the time while he went off on his adventures? The more her emotions became engaged with him, the more difficult it would be to say goodbye while he traveled the world. And while she did want to go on some adventures herself, she wasn’t sure that they were the same types of adventures he would choose.
Her phone chirped a short time later, and Maya picked it up to see a message from Gabe giving her a bunch of links to his social media pages.
Gabe: Be sure to follow/friend me if you set up any accounts for yourself. ;-)
A sudden rush of tears caught Maya off-guard, and she had to blink away the moisture in order to tap out a reply to Gabe. I will. Thanks for the links.
She set her phone back down on the seat beside her, uncertain that she wanted to see anything about the adventures that were taking him away from Winnipeg. Maybe when her mindset was in a better place, she’d have a look.
Gabe looked around at the people gathered with his family to ring in the New Year. He really wished that Maya had been able to make it, but he knew that he had no right to request that she prioritize him over her family. They hadn’t even defined their relationship. All Gabe knew was that her not being there had created a feeling of missing part of himself.
“Everything okay?”
Gabe looked to his side and saw that his mom had come to stand beside him. She looked up at him, concern on her face. He gave her what he hoped was a reassuring smile. “It’s all good.”
The way she quirked an eyebrow at him told him that she wasn’t buying it. “Are you having second thoughts about leaving?”
Was he? He didn’t think so. There was still excitement about the trip, it was just that he didn’t like the idea of leaving Maya behind. However, while he did get the feeling that she had some interest in adventures, he didn’t think her interest would be on the same level as his.
“I’m looking forward to it. It’s been awhile since I’ve wandered around Asia. I think it will be fun.”
“And dangerous,” his mom added with a frown.
“Not all of it,” Gabe tried to reassure her. “It’s not really dangerous to ride on an elephant. I mean, they had elephant rides at the zoo when I was younger.”
“Oh, I remember that, and I wasn’t too thrilled about you riding on one even then. Although that didn’t stop you.”
Gabe grinned. “Of course it didn’t.”
She gripped his upper arm and rested her head against his shoulder, staring out at their family and friends. “Nothing ever really has stopped you. I thought maybe a certain someone might have been enough.”
“We’ve not even known each other a month, Mom,” Gabe said, though the words felt wrong even as he said them. It was like he was dismissing the connection they shared as something so much less than it was.
“Time doesn’t necessarily define the depths of what two people can feel for each other. For some people, time will never deepen what they feel for one another. For others, that deep connection comes on much more quickly.” His mom hesitated, her grip tightening briefly on his arm. “I’ve never seen you like that with any other woman.”
“That’s probably true, but I have dated—just not here. You haven’t seen me with those women.”
When she didn’t reply right away, he glanced down to see her looking at him. “I don’t think I need to.”
Gabe let out a quick sigh. “I don’t have any choice but to leave, Mom. You and Dad have always impressed on us the importance of following through on commitments we make. I have signed contracts with companies for this trip and a few more after it. There’s no way I can just drop everything.”
“Will you consider not signing any more contracts after that? Maybe it’s time you think about settling down.”
Was it time to settle down? For the first time in his life, Gabe didn’t immediately dismiss his mom’s suggestion. That, more than anything, showed just how much he felt for Maya.
“I might consider it. I’ll see how things go with the next few trips.” He was already in discussions with a couple of other companies for future adventures, but nothing had been signed yet, so those could possibly be passed over. But did he really want to do that?
Maybe it was time to start looking at how he could balance his love for adventure with his desire to be with Maya. He knew that a relationship would never work if he wasn’t present for ten months out of the year. It was unrealistic to expect Maya to put her life on hold for him, but the thought of letting her go and maybe her finding a guy who was willing to give her priority ate at his gut. He couldn’t just let her go without at least trying to see if a relationship would work.
“This may be the year for change,” Gabe murmured to his mom. “We’ll see.”
“I think it might be a year of change for a lot of people, not just you.”
Gabe turned slightly so he could look her squarely in the face. “Is there something going on?”
His mom smiled then shook her head. “Nothing but a whole lot of prayer.”
Her answer was no surprise to him. Gabe knew that his parents prayed daily for all of them. His parents’ prayers weren’t something he took for granted. In the course of his life of adventure, he’d come across plenty of people who were estranged from their families. Some had left their family of their own accord. Others had been kicked out of their family’s homes for a variety of reasons.
After having met those people and gone on to call some of them friends, Gabe knew he was beyond blessed with the life he led and the family he had to support him. Yeah, his mom wanted him to stop his adventures, but when push came to shove, she’d see him off the next day with a hug and a smile and a promise to pray for him. There wasn’t much more he could ask for when it came to supportive parents.
“I’m sorry Maya couldn’t make it tonight,” she said, once more turning her attention to the room.
“Yeah, me too, but she had plans with her parents. They’re out of town right now.”
“Maybe next New Year’s Eve,” his mom said, squeezing his arm.
Gabe laughed. “Yeah, maybe.”
Strangely enough, he could actually picture being in that same place a year from then, getting ready to ring in the New Year with a kiss from Maya. The mental picture settled deep into his heart, and he knew that it would keep coming to mind until things were official between him and Maya. As the clock edged closer to midnight, Gabe resolved it would be something he’d talk to her about when he came back in four weeks.
14
With the knowledge that Gabe was no longer on the same continent as she was, Maya took her time driving to the office on the day after she’d gotten back from New York. It was a sad thought for her, and she was full of regret that she hadn’t just ditched the trip to New
York so that she could have spent New Year’s Eve with him. But it was too late now. And her resolve to keep her distance from him no longer mattered because he was gone.
Pulling her collar up around her ears, Maya sighed, envying the fact that Gabe was someplace warm, and pushed open her car door. She grabbed her purse and got out, slamming the door behind her. Thankfully, it was a quick walk to the front door of the building, and soon she was within its warm interior. The Christmas decorations were still up, and the lights on the tree glowed warmly in contrast to the cold, gray day outside.
As Maya walked toward her desk, her footsteps faltered then came to a stop at the sight that greeted her. On her desk sat a beautiful floral arrangement. It was an explosion of colors with flowers of blue, pink, yellow, red and white all arranged together. Maya smiled as she continued to her desk, rounding the corner of it to reach her chair.
Keeping her gaze on the bouquet, Maya unbuttoned her coat and hung it up on the rack behind her desk. Setting her purse on the desk, she sank down onto her chair. She reached out and touched the petals of a daisy before letting herself pick up the large envelope that was propped up against the bouquet. Her name was scrawled across the front of it, and she traced the letters, realizing this was the first time she’d seen Gabe’s handwriting. It was nothing like Mitch’s, which was much more compact and neat.
Smiling, she slid a finger under the flap of the envelope and gently pulled out the card that was inside. The front of the card was yet another beautiful floral explosion of color. When she opened it, Gabe’s scrawl filled the page.
Dear Maya,
Happy New Year!
I hope you had a good start to the year. My year is off to a great start because you are now a part of it. These flowers are my way of showing you how my life looks with you in it. Bright. Cheerful. Beautiful. I hope they made you smile because the world needs you to smile more. Seeing your smile has certainly brought me much joy.
I haven’t even left yet, and I already want to be back. I can’t wait to see you again.
Take care of yourself.
The Love of Her Life: A Christian Romance (The Callaghans & McFaddens Book 3) Page 17
