Resisting Her Army Doc Rival

by Sue MacKay

  It was kind of cosy in here, even if they were trapped. While he should be worrying about getting them out safely, it was the scent that he’d been noticing since Madison’s arrival on the Peninsula getting him worked up. Again summer enveloped him. Not any old summer but Christchurch in February when the temperature could be thirty or fifteen in the same hour, where the sky ranged from blue to grey, and the wind had its own agenda. But it was always summer. The trees were green, the farms brown from lack of water, and the locals were at the beach or the parks. Homesickness floored him. ‘I’ve missed home.’

  Maddy sat up. ‘Lucky for you Burnham’s your next posting then. You’ll be able to catch up with lots of people in Christchurch, as well as Mr and Mrs Creighton.’

  ‘I suspect I’ll be busy. The army has a way of filling our time.’ There weren’t any others to call on as he hadn’t bothered staying in touch much after he’d finished school. Got Dad’s genes there? Shock blasted him, dried his mouth, curdled his gut. No damned way. But he had walked away from his mates without looking back. What about the guys he’d befriended while training to become a doctor? He knew where most of them were, occasionally emailed to see what they were up to. Not often, and not involved enough to call being friendly.

  Maddy’s gaze met his. ‘Sounds like an excuse to me.’

  ‘That’s because it is,’ he admitted as he assimilated the truth. He had always walked away from people, had been the one to set the bar. Except for William, who’d become closer than any other friend he’d had, and had been impossible to ignore. Then William had done the leaving.

  ‘How long are you going to stay in the military?’ Maddy asked, unaware of his shock.

  ‘I’ve not decided. It’s my career so as long as they’ll have me, I guess.’ He’d joined to get away from his life, to do something for his country. Now he saw he’d been avoiding the intimacy of a practice in a town with a steady stream of locals and had gone for the broader picture of helping his country and strangers in out-of-the-way places. There’d been no excitement, only a hard slog that had done nothing to make him happy, only sadder that soldiers were even needed in this world. For a while after William died he’d almost had a death wish, had certainly pushed the boundaries when there had been danger in the zone. That was slowly ebbing away. Since Maddy had turned up? Or as a result of too much time away from home, doing as ordered without thought or concern?

  She was talking again. Needing to override the sounds of creaking timbers as the soldiers uncovered them. ‘You’re not interested in getting into surgical practice full-time? It seems a shame when you’ve done all that training and obviously like the work.’

  Glad to be drawn away from where his own thoughts had been headed, he said, ‘None of it’s wasted, Maddy.’ He realised now that the idea of getting into surgery on a full-time basis had been simmering in a corner of his mind. As if he had stopped looking back and was instead now looking ahead for a future to immerse himself in. He instantly put up the usual barriers. ‘I’m getting the best of two worlds.’

  There had been a time in med school when he’d imagined his own rooms back in Christchurch, a partnership with other specialists to cover a range of medical fields. But the nervous energy that kept him from settling or getting close to people, from creating his own comfort zone, had thrown up the fear he might become bored with being tied to one place and career that would stretch out until he retired many years down the track. Now hauling heavy packs and weapons around a desert no longer held any appeal either.

  ‘I’m hoping to figure out my next moves while I’m here.’ Maddy smiled ruefully. ‘Can’t see me making the army my life. I’ll do all I can as a soldier while here and then I’ll make some decisions.’

  Did she realise her hands were on his thighs? Heat sizzled from her palms into his upper legs. How was he supposed to ignore her? Turn her away? He was no saint. And right this minute he had to fight with everything he had not to place his hands on her body and feel her, know her, have her. So much so that he daren’t even push her hands away as that meant touching her.

  Shouts and voices were coming closer, audible over the crashing and banging of timber and who knew what else being moved aside. ‘Sam? Madison? Can you hear us?’

  ‘They’ll be hearing you back at base,’ he called out, relieved at the interruption. Disappointed he wouldn’t have the chance to follow through on those heart-stopping sensations Maddy caused him.

  ‘Okay, you two, time you stopped lazing around and got back to camp.’ Jock pushed through a gap behind them.

  ‘What took you so long?’ Sam growled, despite being grateful for the time he’d had with Maddy. A time of discovery—about Madison and himself. Though he wasn’t so grateful for what he’d learned about himself.

  ‘Anyone would think we had nothing better to do than come hauling you out of here.’ Jock grinned. ‘Next time you’re going to town, take a hard hat and an axe.’

  Maddy pushed up onto her knees. ‘There isn’t going to be a next time.’

  Somehow that felt like a stab to Sam’s heart. As though she was talking to him and not to Jock about where he’d found them.

  ‘Want one of the boys to drive you back to base?’ Jock asked.

  No, he didn’t. ‘You heading back?’

  ‘Orders are to look around, see if we can learn what caused the explosion.’ Jock eyeballed him. ‘Take Madison and fix that bang on her head. Leave this to us.’

  Sounded much like an order to him. Sam nodded. ‘Sure.’ Though he would probably be safer staying here with the troops than spending more time alone with Maddy, he did want to snatch whatever hours he could with her.

  ‘Glad you see things my way.’ Jock backed out. ‘Follow me, Madison. Keep low or you’ll be banging your noggin again.’

  * * *

  The medical unit was empty of all personnel when Madison and Sam pushed through the door. ‘Where’s everyone?’ she asked, looking around. She’d never seen it so empty, so quiet.

  ‘Back in town, cleaning up after us.’ Sam dropped his bag of shopping on a desk. ‘Let me look at that cut.’

  ‘It’ll be fine.’ It didn’t hurt, though when she had a shower the water would sting a little.

  A firm grip on her elbow had her heading towards the treatment room, regardless of any protests she uttered.

  ‘I’ve gone deaf,’ Sam said as he pushed her onto a chair by the bed. ‘Now, this might be a little uncomfortable.’ His fingers probed her skull, gentle with their touch. ‘Not bad. I’ll clean it up and put some tape on to keep the dust out.’

  Succumbing, Madison sat still and let the fear and fright of the last few hours wash out of her. Unbelievable that she’d been in another disastrous situation. Unbelievable she’d come out virtually unscathed. ‘I wonder what happened to Bix.’

  ‘The guys are searching for him,’ Sam muttered. ‘Try not to think about him.’

  ‘Easily said.’ She drew air into her lungs, breathed in Sam, aftershave and man and sweat. There was comfort in that scent, in the quiet of this room with its walls and roof in their right place, in being safe.

  ‘There.’ He snapped off the gloves he’d tugged on moments earlier. His finger lifted her chin so she looked into his eyes. ‘You’re all good to go.’

  ‘Thank you for being there for me,’ she managed around a thick tongue.

  ‘You wouldn’t have been there if not because I took you to town.’

  ‘Don’t come the guilty party. You didn’t blow that café up. It was bad timing, that’s all.’

  His head was closer to hers now, that mouth so near she only had to lean a bit further upwards and her lips were skimming Sam’s.

  His hands fell to her shoulders, his fingers splayed and pressing into her.

  And all the brakes came off. Not slowly, not one by one, but instantly,
freeing her from the restraints she kept wound tight.

  She pushed up for a kiss, a deep, bone-melting one that sent shockwaves through her body and aimed for her centre. Heat pooled at her apex as days of withheld desire overwhelmed her. Her hands shoved under his shirt, found his skin, spread across his chest, touched his nipples. It wasn’t enough. Tearing at his buttons, she ripped the shirt open and took a nipple between her lips, teased, licked, and ran her teeth lightly across the peak.

  Above her Sam groaned. Then he was lifting her, placing her on the bed. Two fast strides and the door was locked. Two strides back and he was lying down beside her, reaching for her.

  His erection pressed against her thigh, bringing a moan to her lips. She flipped over, straddled him, felt his sex against her core. Knew she had to have him. Then his hands were under her shirt, gliding over her breasts, satisfying her need to be touched yet rocking her to the core with the intensity of sensations his urgent caresses released.

  She was going to make love with Sam. Even as that heat-hazed thought spilled through her mind he was moving his hands downwards, away from her smooth breasts towards her stomach.

  ‘Stop,’ she cried, jerking upright.

  No. I can’t do it. I won’t do it. He’ll touch me and that look of horror will fill his eyes. I’d rather have been flattened in the explosion.

  She climbed off his body to sit on the chair with her knees drawn up and her arms wrapped tight around them. ‘Sorry,’ she muttered. ‘I should never have started that.’

  Sam was breathing hard as he sat upright and looked at her with nothing but puzzlement in his expression. No censure at all. But he didn’t know, hadn’t seen. ‘Talk to me, Maddy.’

  She shook her head. ‘No.’ What was the point? Been there, and couldn’t face a rerun. Especially not with Sam. From the moment she’d seen him across the parade ground the day she’d arrived there’d been some connection between them, and for him to see the scars that distorted her body would destroy that. Even if it was never going anywhere, she couldn’t cope with their relationship being reduced to sympathy on his part and agony on hers.

  He reached down, took her hands in his, gently lifted her arms away from her knees, opened her to him again. A tremor ran through his body, reaching her through his fingers. She had cut him off in mid-stride when he’d been hard, tight and in need of release.

  ‘That touching your midriff you do? You were injured when that beam came down on you and your grandfather, right?’

  Sam’s voice was so compelling it coaxed her to look at him, even when she was afraid of what she’d find in his eyes. She gasped. Nothing but care blinked out at her. ‘Yes,’ she whispered.

  ‘You received burns?’ He tightened his grip on her hands as she made to pull free.

  Her head dropped downwards in answer to his question. Now you know, you’ll leave me alone. Please.

  ‘I should’ve figured that out. It’s why you always wear long shirts, isn’t it?’

  Another nod. ‘Are we done?’ He didn’t need to know anything else.

  ‘Not by a long way. We’re only getting started. Look at me, Maddy.’

  When she finally did, Sam smiled at her, a long, slow smile that reached his eyes and touched her in places she didn’t want touched. Her heart was meant to be unavailable due to fear and vulnerability.

  But his smile was continuing the thaw he’d started days ago. She had to stop it before she messed up and let him in. ‘No, Sam. I made a mistake kissing you, by taking it further.’ He still didn’t look upset. ‘I am not making love with you. We’re not getting close.’

  ‘How long were you in hospital?’

  Surprised at his question she answered instantly. ‘More than three months while the burns healed and I fought endless infections. Afterwards I took a year convalescing before returning to work at the hospital.’

  ‘That would’ve put your training behind schedule.’

  ‘It did, but I got there in the end.’

  ‘No side effects?’

  She looked away. Her hand covered her tummy where her uterus lay.

  Sam’s fingers shifted through her short hair. ‘Tell me, Maddy. We’ve come this far you might as well share the whole story.’

  She fidgeted with the hem of her shirt. What did it matter if he knew? They weren’t going to get together so there wouldn’t be any talk of having babies. ‘I might be infertile. The worst part of that is I won’t know until I try to get pregnant—if I try.’ What man was going to accept her on those terms? ‘That’s the conundrum. Do I ask someone to risk trying with me and watch him walk away when I fail to become pregnant? Or do I accept it’s unlikely to happen and work at making my career into something bigger than I’d intended so I won’t waste time regretting what I haven’t got?’

  ‘That’s an agonising decision to have to make.’

  Not if she had someone at her side. But she didn’t.

  ‘You are amazing, Maddy. So strong to deal with all this.’ Sam leaned down for another kiss; a long, slow, burning one.

  Maddy fought the incoming waves of need that instantly fired up and began shoving her anguish aside. That anguish was meant to keep her out of trouble. Pulling her head away, she managed, ‘Stop.’

  He was still holding her hands, and when she tried to withdraw he only tightened his grip. ‘Don’t.’

  ‘Why? There’s nothing to be gained.’ Except more hurt.

  A sigh escaped Sam. ‘I touched your breasts, felt their weight in my hands. For days I’ve been aware of them pushing out the front of your shirts. They’re beautiful, Madison.’

  ‘I got lucky there.’

  ‘Not only there. You’re a striking woman who’s intelligent, a wonderful doctor, and can sing me into a lather in an instant.’ His mouth tipped up into one of those smiles she was coming to recognise as her addiction. Smiles that made her feel special, as though he only gave them to her. ‘Don’t hide from me. Or anyone. Or life. You’re missing out on so much by doing this to yourself.’

  ‘Easy for you to say. Think I should chuck my clothes aside and let a man get an eyeful? See horror or worse fill his gaze just before he turns away from me for ever? I don’t think so.’

  ‘Who did that to you?’ His arms were cradling her, but he still managed to watch her with fierce intensity.

  ‘Jason,’ she whispered.

  Of course Sam swore. She’d expect nothing less. While it felt good knowing he was on her side it changed nothing. He asked, ‘Is that why your marriage failed?’

  ‘Yes.’ So much for the wonderful relationship she’d believed she’d had with her husband if he could leave so effortlessly.

  Sam placed the softest of soft kisses on her forehead. Then one on the tip of her nose. ‘Don’t cry.’

  She wasn’t aware she was.

  Then Sam’s mouth covered hers and there was nothing tame about the kiss he gave her. It was deep, intense, and his rising passion told her she hadn’t put him off at all. He wanted her.

  She wanted him.

  Her body arched under his hands as longing pulsed through her veins and moisture pooled at her centre. She wanted Sam.

  Could she have him? As in take her clothes off? If she was going to do this then she wasn’t going to hide anything. Gulp. Her heart slowed its mad beating. I can’t do it.

  Sam’s hands on her shirt-covered waist told her differently. Their tenderness told her she had to, needed to. Wanted to.

  Her breath hitched in her throat as she began to ease her top up. Her hands shook, her toes curled tight. There was no moisture in her mouth. Get it over with. Drawing in a deep breath, she grabbed the hem of her shirt and tugged it over her head. She didn’t want to look at Sam but knew she had to. Words could never tell her the truth as clearly as his eyes would.

  In
silence Sam regarded her hideous scars, and no disgust or horror darkened his eyes. Only sadness and acceptance. When his fingers traced some of the marks left by that burning beam she held her breath, unable to comprehend what was happening. He should be running for the hills, or at least saying something condescending. But no. His eyes held only tenderness. Tenderness that changed to awe as he lifted his gaze to her breasts. When his tongue lapped his lips the tension began receding, making her feel light and dizzy.

  Sam still wanted her.

  Her fingers splayed across his chest. Under one palm his fast heartbeat replicated hers.

  Sam wanted her.

  With one smooth move Madison stood up to shuck her trousers and panties, tossed her bra to join her shirt. Then she went to work undressing Sam.

  ‘Condom,’ he said through clenched teeth.

  ‘You come prepared?’ Her heart rate wavered.

  ‘In the top drawer of the desk. For the guys who forget to buy them.’

  ‘How—?’

  ‘Maddy, shut up.’ He was kissing her thigh, moving ever upward to where she throbbed with need.

  Gripping his head, she held him against her. ‘Don’t stop, whatever you do.’

  His reply was to use his tongue to send shockwaves rolling through her.

  She gasped. Her fingers dug harder at his skull. When he did it again she clung to him, not wanting to move for fear of putting air between them.

  ‘I want you,’ she croaked. ‘I want to touch you, hold you in my hand.’

  Slowly he withdrew, lifted her up over his body as he sprawled across the bed. ‘You’re on top. I want to watch you come.’

  Reaching between them, she sought and found his shaft, wound her hand around him. Down, up. He strained against her, pushing up into her hand.