by Jack Parker
"David, please escort Sheriff Armentrout to his car and see him off the property." David nodded and looked expectantly at the sheriff who nodded.
"I'm sorry to bother you, Ma'am. I will call personally and set up interview times when that investigator gets here. Could you give me your number before I go? You're not listed yet." He had regained his confidence and stood taller, remembering that he had a job to do.
"Never will I be." Luci murmured as she released her hold on me and thumped towards her desk. I immediately felt the panic rising again. What if he grabbed me and took off? Could David and Luci stop him? Could I? Heat rushed to my head, and I breathe deeply to avoid passing out again. She returned a few seconds later and resumed her place at my side protectively, not venturing closer to Sheriff Armentrout. He took the card and nodded his goodbye. David lumbered after him like Luci had asked.
"Sheriff?" The two men turned towards Luci's threatening red silk. "Do not return to my home uninvited unless you have obtained a warrant. Lauren's relationship with her father was strained, yes, and though I understand how the situation may appear, your authority does not extend to premature accusations without sufficient evidence. I will not tolerate any further distraction and unwarranted anxiety conferred upon my staff, Lauren included. Any unannounced contact will be perceived as harassment and trespassing. It is my understanding that West Virginia has not faltered in its "shoot first, ask questions later" policy regarding trespassers on private property. Am I correct?"
Luci and Sheriff Armentrout stared each other down, and I almost wished for Barb's saloon doors to miraculously appear. A duel of wills took place, and I felt certain Luci won. Her fingers clamped my shoulder tightly, the only indication of her anxiety. Everything else screamed confidence, but I knew that his visit had rattled her as much as me. The silence dragged out for an eternity before the sheriff tipped his head in agreement.
"Yes, Ma'am." His teeth clenched, muffling his words. I'd never seen him so thoroughly cowed by anyone. Cops around here came with an attitude and an air of entitlement, and though Derrick was a good man at heart, he was no exception. The urge to laugh at his reaction to Luci's barely concealed threat died in my chest when I glanced up at her eyes. The thudding of boots faded and ended with a groan of aged hinges as the men departed.
Luci refused to meet my eyes even as I stared at hers. She moved towards her desk and leaned her hands on the edge, head bowed between her shoulders as she collected her temper. Her shoulders and back muscles coiled and relaxed as she tried to work the tension from her body and return her breathing to normal. I imagined the lean body hidden beneath the baggy plaid fabric as her ribs expanded and her breasts strained again the tight fabric of the cotton camisole. I swallowed the bile rising in my throat.
I had begun this endeavor as an opportunity to escape my life, but somehow I'd become more invested in the woman standing before me than intended. I cared for her, but it didn't change the reality that I'd caused the grief and anger and confusion that she now struggled to control. Even when I made better choices, developed loyalty to a person, my existence consistently brought pain to those around me, to those for whom I cared.
"Luci?" My throat caught, and swallowed roughly.
"Did you do it?" Her voice caught me off guard. It was harsh and cold, and dangerously deep. Black silk.
"What?" The shock and surprise of the question and her threatening tone paralyzed my thoughts. I flinched at the shattering of porcelain and the twang of that little silver tray that always held her tea smashing against the wall beside her desk. Pencils and paperclips skidded across the polished wood, and a piece of paper fluttered between us as Luci whirled to face me.
"Did you fucking do it!" Her fists clenched at her sides, knuckles white from pressure. I stepped away from her, my body reacting instinctively.
"N-no," my voice shook, but I spared it no thought. I searched for an image of Luci's kind blue eyes that had brought so much comfort in the past two months to my weary soul and tried to remember that I'd brought this upon her and now I must set it right again.
She stepped forward, and I held my ground. If she struck me, I deserved it and forgave her because she certainly didn't deserve this stress, not after everything she'd already survived. Her fierce eyes bore into mine as her fingers dug into my biceps. She towered over me, and I ignored the instinct to fight boiling in my belly.
"Did Ashley do your bidding? Is that why she left so upset yesterday?" Her voice reverberated across the walls, and I flinched.
"What? That's crazy! Ashley didn't kill anybody. We fought, that's all. That's why she was upset." Words tumbled from my tongue without thought. She released my arms with a shove and turned towards her desk.
"Am I supposed to actually believe that your oldest and closest friend left my home in tears the day after your father died due merely to a disagreement?" She leaned against her desk, arms crossed. Her flushed cheeks clenched and jumped in the fading ire, but her burning eyes told me that it hadn't disappeared. She'd only contained it
"Yes, you are." Confidence grew in my chest now that the worst of Luci's anger had passed or at the very least had been controlled for the moment. "That's what happened. No matter how many different ways you ask me, the answer isn't going to change." I begged her with my eyes to believe me. I had nowhere else to go, but more importantly, there was nowhere else I'd rather be than arguing with this complicated, beautiful creature. I'd think on the ramifications of my confused and conflicted attachment to Luci later, alone, but in that moment, all I wanted was to regain her trust.
"Go back to work, Lauren. We only have the crew and equipment until 3." She commanded weakly and retrieved her office chair. I searched for the words to fix the situation, and found none. I nodded at her back when she bent to gather the scattered office supplies, shoved my hands in the front pockets of my jeans, and turned towards the door before she could see the tears threatening to flood my cheeks. The openness from only a few minutes ago had disappeared, and a barrier had been constructed, higher and stronger.
"Lauren?" I froze and hoped that Luci had changed her mind. "Tell Berta to bring some more tea and something to clean this coffee and glass." My heart dropped into my belly. Luci had never before spoken to me in the same manner as Mattie and David. I'd been demoted to just another staff member, and I felt the blow as if she'd physically struck me.
I nodded at her back again, not trusting my voice to remain steady and bolted from the room. I ran across the Great Hall and did not slow until I passed through the dining room. Berta banged a pot on the stove as I stood outside the kitchen and caught my breath. The sound reminded me of Barb's habit of smacking the edge of that metal spatula on the grease trap of the grill, and I smiled. Saucy cooks were the wisest people. My tears renewed as my thoughts turned to Barb and Stephanie. I really destroyed everyone I touched.
"Are you going to skulk about all day or come in?" Berta called from the stove, and I practically jumped into the kitchen.
"What's the matter, girlie?" She asked without glancing up from the steaming pot she stirred. I sighed and picked up the chopping knife she'd laid out beside two tomatoes on a cutting board on the island.
"Sheriff Armentrout just came by to tell us that I'm a murder suspect. Are you slicing or chopping these?" I confided to the stoic cook. I wanted her so badly to be Barb that I refused to look at her. Barb would have known what to do, what to say to me.
"Chop," Berta grunted without turning from the stove, and my shoulders drooped as her thick accent and gravelly voice reminded me that she wasn't the beloved diner owner. Perhaps I should visit soon and apologize to Ashley.
"What's she need now?" Berta removed the pot from the stove and shuffled to the sink to drain it.
"Some tea and mop to clean up coffee." I chopped the tomatoes. "Oh, and something to put glass in."
The familiar thunk of the knife hitting the cutting board soothed my raw nerves. Kitchens were safe and familiar and also a painfu
l reminder of what I'd given up in order to work for Luci. If I asked, I felt certain that Barb would take me back. Ashley would forgive me, and maybe Stephanie and I could be friends. With my father out of the picture completely and permanently, I might have been able to find some respect and peace in the town. Of course, that would also require me to keep my hands to myself and knees shut.
"What got broke?" Berta demanded, legitimately offended that one of her dishes had been damaged.
"The pot David brought coffee in. Luci knocked it off the desk." She'd find out eventually, so I saw no reason to hide the facts.
"Luci?" Berta thumped the pot of pasta onto the metal island beside me and punched a fist to her hip.
"Yeah, she got mad." I finished the tomatoes and set the knife down gently. Berta's huge eyes stared passed me, unseeing, and glazed over with memories.
"Berta?" My worry grew when she shook her head and pushed me towards the door.
"You go. I will take care of Luci." Berta's voice dropped back to its normal grunting tone, but her frantic movements told me that she was hiding something.
"No." I slapped her hands away and planted my feet firmly on tile. "What is it, Berta? I'm not leaving this kitchen until you tell me what in the hell happened in there. One minute she's talking about what went down with Emily and then the sheriff shows up and she's breaking shit and freaking out on me."
"Don't play with things you don't understand, girlie." Berta's anger at my insolence laced her voice, but I didn't care. "Luci's plan got spoiled. She's a brat when she doesn't get her way."
"What do you know, old woman? I have a right to know. She's not flinging trays of hot coffee at you or David or Mattie. I'm in the line of fire here, and I need something to protect myself with and help Luci." I crossed my arms and held my ground. If Berta cared for Luci as much as I suspected, I knew she would help me. What mother wouldn't? She may not have given birth to Luci, but Berta loved her like a daughter.
"Listen, girl, these are questions for Luci, not for an old woman to be answering. I will talk to her, though, about 'flinging trays' at you." Berta answered coldly, and I fought the urge to step back from her icy gaze.
"That's not what I meant, Berta. I'm not tattling to the teacher. I just want to understand what the hell happened." I felt my confidence slipping, and I nearly gave in to my urge to beg as I watched her collect hot water and teabags onto a tray. This woman knew something and deliberately withheld information.
"I told you. Ask Luci these questions." She brushed past me with the tray in one hand and towels in the other. I leaned my head to the side and popped my neck, sighing as some of the tension flowed out of my shoulders. Luci had helped and given me so much, and my helplessness to return the favor irritated me. Determination filled my chest, and I set my course from the kitchen to the balcony. Mattison usually cleaned the rooms there during the morning while everyone was otherwise occupied.
I smiled when I heard the bass thumping from her gigantic headphones before I even saw her. She'd be deaf by the time she turned thirty at this rate, but her effervescence soothed the sting of Luci's words. She twisted her hips with the beat as she wiped at a window, completely unaware of my presence. I tapped her shoulder and giggled when she jumped, the head phones sliding to her neck with the sudden motion.
"Lauren, you scared me!" She laughed and pulled her IPod from the back pocket of her jeans. I almost sighed in relief when the blaring music ceased and silence encased the balcony. Her arms were around me in a friendly hug before I spoke, and I returned the gesture. The physical contact comforted me after the emotional rollercoaster of the morning, and slowly my muscles unknotted themselves as the stress slipped away in the embrace.
"Didn't mean to scare you," I apologized as I pulled away and took a step back.
"No worries. How are you holding up? It's been a tough couple of days for you. When I saw David carrying you through the yard, my heart stopped for a minute. I was so scared that you were hurt. I'm glad you are okay." Mattie's accent slurred the fast words, and my mind took a moment to catch up with the meaning of everything.
"Yeah, it was pretty stupid of me. As for everything else, I'm taking it as it comes." I smiled reassuringly at the girl. "Listen, I have to get back to work, and I know you do, too, but I was wondering if maybe you could tell me a little bit about Luci." Her brow crinkled in confusion, but she shrugged and leaned against the window sill.
"What do you want to know?"
"I was wondering about Emily actually. And what exactly happened to make her hate Berta so much." Sadness danced in Mattie's eyes, and her face drooped until no expression was discernable. "Mattie?" Her blue-green eyes found the floor, and she knew that Luci had told me about her relationship with Emily.
"I hurt Luci, I know, but I loved Emily. She's only five years older than me, and she was my best friend. We were together always while Luci cared for her mother. I would have stayed with her in France, but Luci is my guardian and would not allow it." She answered honestly and openly, and I adored her for being the first person in this house to give me a straightforward answer.
"Luci's mother was sick?" I prodded gently, lest I scare the girl silent with my enthusiasm.
"Well, not physically." She twisted the rag in her hand nervously. "I never met her in person, but I overheard Luci and Berta talking one night about her mental break down. I think she killed herself, but I could not tell you for certain. Berta still isn't the same since it happened. I think Luci was relieved, though."
"Relieved?"
"I'm sorry, Lauren. I really should get back to work. Luci doesn't like me to talk about Emily." She pulled her IPod from her pocket and searched for a song, though I saw that her eyes were not actually reading the titles but glazed with memories.
"Luci doesn't like you to do a lot of things." I covered the screen with my hand and stopped her desperate searching. Her hand was so incredibly warm beneath my fingertips, and I felt a familiar spark of attraction in my belly. Mattison was so young, but her eyes were old.
Our energies flowed so naturally together, but I knew it was only a trick of my mind. We were both young and damaged, and that was my attraction to her. She was in many ways a kindred spirit, but she was also so easily accessible, so emotionally available, exactly the type of person I used to target. If only Luci had not commanded my allegiance, I would have destroyed Mattison the night she kissed me. Had I no power, she never would have shared as much about Luci as she had. Even when I tried to be better, people fell under my spell, men and women alike.
All except Luci. She felt my pull yet met me string for string as we winched each other closer.
"Kissing me brought her more pain than what you're telling me now, but you did it anyway." Her pulse banged against her neck, and I knew that I'd pressed the right button.
"I did and I am sorry for it. I do not think sometimes. It's like I am possessed, and nothing else matters except the thing that I want." Regret filled her eyes, and I scratched my forehead, the bumps of the still-tender scar. Nothing I could have said would have lightened the sting of her second betrayal of Luci, the woman who had given her a life of relative luxury compared to the one she'd had or would have been forced into after her parents died.
"I shouldn't have let it go that far, Mattie. I'm sorry for prying." My hand fell limply to my side. I searched for something else to say, but found no words of wisdom or comfort to offer the confused and hurting girl. She had learned, as I had a decade ago, that her sexuality was a powerful thing and could either hurt or heal the people around her. Perhaps if she had been given a different destiny, she would have been a healer, someone who soothed agony with a simple touch. Instead, I feared that she'd been sent down the same path I had and could not have found her way back with the aid of a lighthouse. I turned towards the stairs. I needed to get back to David and forget this morning for a little while.
"Lauren?" I sighed and paused, glancing over my shoulder.
"Don't leave, oka
y? I know that your research says that Luci should not be trusted, but she is a good person and she is much happier with you here." Mattison and David had both told me that I made Luci happy, but just my existence had brought nothing but frustration and embarrassment to her doorstep. I wondered exactly how depressed Luci had been before she'd met me if this is what happy looked like.
"Research?" The comment slapped me suddenly when my thoughts of Luci's behavior weakened. "Mattie, I haven't… the file." Ashley had hidden it in my room instead of taking it with her, and Mattison stumbled across it while cleaning.
"The police file?" She nodded. "Where is it?" She cocked her head to one side in confusion but asked no questions.
"I found it under your bed. It is in the top drawer of your bureau." I took off like a shot.
"Thanks, Mattie! And thanks for the chat!" I reached my door before the words had completely left my mouth and I quickly locked myself inside before she commented further. The fact that she'd found the file at all made me uneasy, and I wanted to avoid any further discussion of it with her at all costs.
I nearly ripped the drawer out of its track in my haste to get to the file, but once I had it in my hand, I couldn't open it. Surely if Luci had hidden part of her life, it was for a legitimate reason. Everyone carried secrets and scars and shame. Who was I to pry into hers before she was ready to share them? I slumped onto the bed and stared at the manila folder gripped tightly in my hands. This file could have contained a deep dark secret that Luci may have paid me to forget, maybe enough to leave this place and never look back.
That was my intentions after all, wasn't it? Get the money and get out before I became too attached, but so much had transpired since I'd made the decision to work for Luci. She still believed my intentions pure, that she'd finally found the heir to her fortune. I'd lived here a month and still had no clue as to what her business may be or how to run it. Maybe I would like it, running her business. I told myself that was the reason I gently placed the file in its previous hiding spot and left the room, but a tiny voice in the back of my conscience told me that I had grown too close to Luci, too attached to her staff. I ignored it as I opened the heavy front door and crossed the yard with purpose.
