by Jack Parker
I wasn't too close. I was role-playing. I needed Luci's trust in order to complete the mission, right? Blackmail alone wasn't enough, right? I convinced myself over and over that I only cared for the sake of escaping this horrid small town. Luci's dirty little secrets had begun surfacing, and the more I knew, the bigger my bargaining chip became. If they suspected me of my father's death, I doubted seriously I'd evade those charges for long. I must leave, and Luci held the key to my freedom.
CHAPTER 15
The sun felt cooler against my numbed skin as I strode towards the work area. David smiled at me as I approached him, and I reminded myself that I cared nothing for him. Luci and her staff were still my pawns in this game, and I was queen. I simply needed to practice patience and calculate which move bore the best fruit. He scooped up a hardhat and shoved it on my head and threw a heavy arm around my shoulders when I reached him, and I told myself that the smile on my face was caused by a need to keep him in the dark about my purpose and not because of his brotherly affection.
"You okay, Little Hummingbird?" He yelled over the thrumming machines and smiled down at me again.
"Hummingbird?" The nickname caught me off guard, and I squinted against the sunlight as I looked into his twinkling brown eyes.
"Yeah, you fly from place to place so fast, that we can hardly keep eyes on ya!" He chuckled at his cleverness, and I convinced myself that the heat rising in my chest was not fondness but embarrassment.
"I guess you're right. I'm fine." I answered and turned my eyes towards the men in the forest. "Where are we at?"
"We got maybe a tenth of a mile to go. They got a small truck almost to the river. They are bringing logs out and loading them up with the backhoe. Do you want them to do anything else while they are here? If not, they will be done with the heavy stuff in about an hour. Probably another hour to clear the brush and smaller limbs."
"Make sure they pull the stumps up with the backhoe. I'm going to go help load and clear. Want to come?" He grinned and stretched his arm out in imitation of an aristocrat. "Ladies first. I'll go check with the supervisor and make sure their pulling the stumps."
He kept his arm around me as we took a wide berth around the loading zone and picked our way through the brush and fallen logs until we reached the newly cleared trail. The sun heated my body, not David's calm, soothing energy. I pulled away from his arm and hurried to the work crew as soon as I was close enough to justify ending the contact without raising suspicion. I recognized most of them. I'd fucked half of them. I sighed but said nothing as I began throwing brush onto the bed of the truck. I supposed all of the bigger logs had been trucked out, and they had moved onto the brush and limbs. David must have sensed my unease and stayed at my side for a few moments and then approached the crew leader. I hated him for it. I hadn't needed or wanted his protection, not when he was the one who would need it from me in the end.
"Is that your new fuck of the day, Laur!" One of the boys bellowed from the edge of the stream.
His head and shirt were soaked; he must have been dipping his head in the river when I arrived. I'd had him last year. What was his name? Kevin? Corey? Caleb? I didn't remember. My crude retort died on my lips when some of the other guys chimed in agreement. I ignored them and continued gathering brush. David alternated his glare between the men and me, waiting for my reply. Poor David had no clue who I truly was, but these men had known me my entire life. I'd gone to school with most of them. They at least knew a little of what I was capable.
"Don't he talk?" Kevin-Corey-Caleb asked and slapped another man's shoulder with the back of his hand as they laughed. They were right to laugh at someone like me trying to play at being a half-way decent human being.
"Ignore them, David," I whispered when he appeared at my side and helped me heft a bigger tree branch onto the truck bed. His face reddened in anger, but he nodded, respecting my wishes.
"Lookie at that! She got him trained not to speak." The voice was different this time. Another had jumped onto the bandwagon. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath to steady my nerves and then reached for some smaller brush.
"Aren't you supposed to be working or something?" I threw in their direction as I tossed my handful of debris onto the truck. I put my hands on my waist and cocked my hip to one side as I stared at them.
"Why don't you suck my dick again?" Kevin-Corey-Caleb shouted and grabbed his crotch. "We been out here all damn day."
"I hardly found it the first time, and I think my eyes are going bad. Sorry 'bout your luck." I grabbed another branch and hefted it towards the truck.
"Aw, c'mon now. I know you've had so many in your mouth that you don't remember mine. Hey, Jeff, you're up for another ride, right? C'mon, Laur, have you done two at once yet?" Kevin-Corey-Caleb asked and slapped his buddy on the arm again. That must be Jeff. I guessed that I'd been with him, too, but I didn't remember his face. Half of the group watched the interaction while the other half shook their heads and returned to work. It gave me hope that not everyone supported their harassment even if it was deserved. I said nothing and returned to work.
"That's enough, boy." David stepped beside me, and I could have kissed him for not putting himself between me and the other men. He wasn't taking control of the situation but letting me know that I wasn't alone. He stood tall and still like a statue, and I worked around him. The men enjoying the taunts ignored him.
"What, you move out here and pretend to be a highfaluting lady, and all of a sudden we ain't good enough anymore." I threw a branch onto the truck and turned for a bigger one. An older crew member even helped me lift the bigger branch onto the truck. I nodded appreciatively towards him, but he had already turned away from me, not willing to accept my favor. David stood watch near the lowered tailgate.
"That why you killed your daddy? Not good enough anymore now that you live in a big fancy house?" Kevin-Corey-Caleb taunted and took a few steps towards me, but David had already reacted. His fist connected with the boy's face with a soft thud, and he fell backwards into the other men who scrambled to keep him off the ground. Everyone stared at the giant man who had come to my rescue and took a step back, not wanting to be the next victim.
I looked around at the men and then beyond them to what used to be my secret solace. It had been tainted by their presence. Tears swelled behind my eyes, and I swallowed until the pressure deflated. I never figured out until much later in life why their harsh words had bothered me so much or perhaps I simply had not want to believe the reason. I had changed. I wasn't the person they described anymore. I cared for the people in my life, now, and genuinely feared hurting them by the antics of the person I used to be. As long as I lived in this town, that Lauren never died, never became anything more than the promiscuous deviant who manipulated a lonely stranger into taking me in, which was exactly what I'd initially done.
I walked away.
I would never be the person Luci wanted me to be because I would never gain the respect of this town. I heard David's deep southern voice speaking sternly to the men behind me, but I never looked back. I didn't want to know what he had said, wrongly assuming that I was a person worth defending. I needed to know what was in Luci's file. I needed to run, to flee from this town and the person I had become. I deserved everything they had said and had no doubt that the situation would have escalated into something physical, something I hadn't wanted, if David had not been present. Sure, most of the crew refused involvement in the situation and as such would have kept their mouths shut tightly had anything happened to me that day.
I ripped my hat off and let it fall onto the grass behind me as I strode purposefully towards the house. I glanced at Luci's office door. It was shut, and I breathed a little more easily. Betraying her would require more effort if she attempted to comfort me. I climbed the steps two at time and slowed only after I had locked myself behind the door of my room. I leaned against the cool wood and caught my breath, less winded from the walk here and more by the angry adrenaline c
oursing through my veins.
I pushed my body away from the door, reevaluating my options once more before jerking the desk drawer open frantically. I wanted to read it quickly before my conscience and emotions caught up with my frustrated panic and desperation to be in a place where no one knew my name. It no longer mattered that I cared for Luci and David and Mattie. I must escape, must run far away where no one could possibly find me and hurt me anymore, but I only stared at the blank folder cover that contained Luci's history and then tossed it on my bed as I crossed the room in search of my cigarettes. It took me four tries before my shaking hands stilled long enough to hold the flame to the tip long enough to transfer the heat required to light it.
I stared at the folder on the bed from the window, like it was a snake prepared to strike, and chewed on my thumbnail. If I hurt Luci, the guilt lasted only a short while and then slowly dissipate into nothing but a dull ache when the memory of her warm skin and brilliant smile crossed my mind. I reassured myself silently that this was who I was. I took what I wanted and disregarded those in my way, but my gut knotted and coiled anyway. I pulled a drag from the cigarette, but the ashy burn failed to soothe me as it usually had. I opened the window and tossed it out before I turned to the folder once more. One secret that needed to stay hidden, and I was out of this town with enough money to take me wherever I wanted to go.
I grabbed the folder quickly and opened it. The first page contained a picture of Luci from what appeared to be a driver's license. I stared at her unsmiling mouth and her hesitant eyes. Of course visiting the DMV set Luci on edge, too many strangers. I tossed the open folder onto the bed and grabbed that sheet, folding the paper to conceal Luci's photo and breathed a relieved sigh. I couldn't betray her while she stared at me. A knock at the door startled me and I dropped the paper. It floated to the bed as Luci's silky blue voice floated through the room.
"Lauren, it's Luci. Is everything all right? David informed me of the incident near the river. I have sent everyone home, so you needn't worry any longer." Poor Luci. She thought I had hidden myself away out of fear for my safety. She really had no clue exactly who she'd invited into her home.
"May I come in, Darling?" I gritted my teeth, grabbed the folder and shoved it back into the desk drawer.
"Just a sec." I pulled my shirt and sports bra off and searched through my dresser for a shirt suitable for distraction. I already knew of her attraction to me, and if she stared at my breasts, meager as they were, then she would lose her bearings. It wasn't much, but it might give me the upper hand I needed to avoid telling her about my sordid past.
I located a camisole that I should have thrown out years ago because I had outgrown it. It was perfect. I pulled it on and moved my ribcage side to side a few times as I adjusted to the feeling of tight fabric pressing against my skin. My flat stomach was nicely accentuated as were my breasts. I readjusted them for maximum exposure without being obvious and then pulled my hair out of its ponytail. I stared at myself in the full length mirror hanging on the closet door as I ran a brush through my long black hair. I didn't look like a whore, but I would definitely be distracted if I were a person already attracted me. I sighed and tossed the brush on the dresser. It would have to do in the time that I had. I opened the door.
Luci's eyes moved down my body momentarily before returning to my face. She cleared her throat and stepped into the room. I closed the door and flipped my hair as I turned around to face her, but the effect was lost to her back. She pulled the desk chair to face the door before she sat on the edge and tucked one ankle behind the other, which looked ridiculous in those tan work boots.
"I don't believe I have ever seen your hair freed from the constraints of those cloth-covered rubber bands that you and Mattison are so fond of using." She commented absently as she studied my long hair. It had grown so fast since I hacked it in Luci's bathroom and naturally fell into huge swooping yet subtle curls over my shoulders that most women would kill for.
"Oh, it happens occasionally." I nearly rolled my eyes. My young, toned body was on display for her viewing pleasure, and she noticed my hair first.
"I do apologize for bringing those men here, Lauren. I was unaware of your tension with them or I would never have asked them here. I do hope you can forgive me." She half-smiled up at me, and my guilt coiled in my stomach again. I didn't want her apology. I wanted her to yell at me for causing a scene or berate me for my sexual indiscretions, anything besides kindness so that I could do what I needed to do in order to see my big escape mission to fruition.
"You didn't say those things. You have nothing to apologize for. It's fine," I responded and sat on the bed. I leaned back on my elbows and propped the heel of my boot on the edge of the bed. The fabric of my already tight camisole stretched painfully across my torso, cutting into my flesh with every breath, and finally Luci allowed her eyes to slip. I practically rubbed it in her face, and surely her libido would not allow her to simply dismiss the image now that it had been implanted in her mind.
"Be that as it may, I do owe you an apology for earlier this morning," she said distractedly and forced her eyes back to my own. I had her.
"Yes, you do." I hadn't meant to sound so accusatory. Had I been in her position, I probably would have asked the same questions, but that didn't lessen the sting. I depended on her to defend me and believe in me, and when she'd asked me if I'd killed my father or asked Ashley to do it, she'd lost all respect and consideration I had given her.
"Would you accompany me to the tower this evening? We shall discuss it further then." Her pleading eyes melted my anger slightly, but the sting of betrayal still burned in my chest.
The heel of my boot slipped off the bed in my distraction, and I allowed it to hang over the side. Luci's eyes travelled down my fully exposed body again, and I shivered. I should have felt triumphant and sexy under her predatory gaze, but as she licked her lips and returned her wide eyes to mine, I only felt exposed and unclean. I wanted Luci to look at me, to find my body pleasing, but I felt shameful that it had happened under false pretenses. Emily's infidelity wouldn't compare to the damage I inflicted. A slight blush tinged her cheeks, and she dropped her gaze to her hand. She'd come here to apologize, and I only thought to deceive her. I sat up and crossed my arms over my chest.
"I did warn you that my moods were unstable and irrational at times, Lauren. They worsen when I am at a disadvantage or surprised. I was both this morning, and I wrongly misdirected my anger at the situation and my helplessness to fix it towards you. I am so very sorry." Her voice sounded sincere, so soft and gentle, and her expressions and gestures followed the script of humility, but something felt out of place, like she wasn't telling me the whole truth or being completely altruistic in her intentions. I uncrossed my arms and leaned back on my hands. I would have her secrets uncovered, and if I used my body and sexuality to find them, then so be it.
"Fine. The tower it is." I slid from the bed and stood in front of the chair. Her knee brushed the leg of my jeans as she leaned back in the chair and angled her face towards mine. "I'm really sick of people accusing me of shit I haven't done."
She laid her arms on the round support of the wooden chair and unhooked her ankles. Her thighs spread slightly as she planted her boots on the hardwood floor, and I wondered if my legs looked that good in jeans. The apologetic woman from only a moment ago vanished, replaced with a predator once more. My body and mind warred against each other and the situation at the same time. My body wanted nothing more than to lean into the sensuous woman presenting herself while my mind fought the urge to run before I became entangled any further.
I nearly fell over from lack of oxygen when she spread her knees and hooked her boot around my calf. She didn't nudge me forward and she didn't speak. One thin eyebrow rose in invitation, and a smirk appeared at the edges of her mouth. She'd known the entire time what the skimpy shirt and suggestive posture indicated and had turned my own game against me. She was good, much better than me. I
revealed my motives too soon, and she had waited for me to feel guilty about them before offering herself to me. All thoughts of deception had been forgotten the moment I stood, and even though I genuinely wanted to touch this woman for the sake of touching her, I must maintain her trust if I hoped to abuse it later. I stepped back and she smiled at me.
"You've learned some self-control. Bravo, Darling." She knew. Someone had already warned her about my sexual exploits, but she hadn't bothered to tell me.
"What do you mean?" Perhaps I could salvage this conversation if I feigned naivety.
"Don't play at words, Lauren. You know exactly to what I am referring. I had wondered if you would dare attempt it, but after this morning, I suspected that I had hurt your feelings or at least your pride enough." My mouth hung open. I hadn't realized that Luci was so in tuned with my thoughts and emotions. Maybe playing her wouldn't be as easy as I'd hoped.
She leaned forward and grasped my hand. I flinched but didn't pull away from her warmth. "I am incredibly happy that you stopped yourself. It gives me hope that I may repair the damage I have caused. We all have a history, Lauren, and each person's life is littered with mistakes they may never rectify. I've shared some of mine with you, and now I only wish to be a stalwart as you recognize and accept your own."
That was what she'd hidden. She wasn't an evil mastermind plotting a diabolical scheme; she was just a woman with a lot of regrets and scars and a kind heart. A bubble of laughter welled in my chest and forced its way out of my mouth. Once I had begun, I was helpless to stop. I turned away from Luci and placed my hands on my hips as I nearly doubled over with laughter. Tears leaked freely from my eyes by the time I had calmed enough to face Luci again. She stood during my outburst and hovered just out of reach until I composed myself. The worry in her eyes summoned another ball of hysterical laughter, but I stifled it before it could reach my lips.
