by Noah Porter
“Alright, we couldn’t see anything that would pose a major problem. I’ll leave you guys to make the arrangements. I need to go see what our plan is,” Dylan started to move away from the group,
“And let me just say that for this to work, don’t use your guns.”
“Who died and made you boss?” Karen muttered at his back.
“Over half of the human population, Karen. Now stop being petty and focus,” Andrew had apparently shaken off his earlier feelings and was pulling himself together again. Before the apocalypse, he had also been in the military. Now that he was coming to his senses, Andrew was not going to let the team fall apart before they even left safety. Karen made a face at him, but Seth put a hand on her shoulder. She looked at him and decided it wasn’t worth fighting, there was always later.
Kyle looked at Andrew, glad to see him starting to act like himself again. He then took over the discussion, “Like Dylan said, we aren’t to use guns because that would attract attention. The point is for us to get around them as quickly and quietly as possible. Now, the parking lot is pretty packed, and there are some, uh, of those walking around between the cars, so use caution. Stay close together and we will take the most direct path to the doors.”
“So when do we do this thing?” Seth was getting antsy.
Kyle chuckled, “Hold up, Rocky. We wait for those guys to charge down the hill. We will be slowly making our way down the road toward the parking lot, staying on the concrete. When we see the majority of the path clear, we take off. The road curves to the right. There are parked cars on the right side of the road, so we will move to the left. Hopefully most of the wedding party will be drawn to the noise, but I’m sure we won’t get away scot-free. Do not fire your guns.”
Ben put up his index fingers, “I’m going to repeat that. Do NOT fire your guns. And now we will pretend that Mason made one of his smartass remarks. Anyone tempted to make noise, remember that asshole will probably make it through just fine, and you will face him if you are stupid enough to fire a loud weapon. And there is not a person here who is going to stick up for you when that happens.”
Kyle nodded, “If we attract their attention it will make it much harder to get to the doors because there are a lot of those bastards down there. We will stay close together, move as a group, and head directly to the doors. Are there any questions?”
The group shook their heads. The directions were pretty clear.
Paige and Mason approached them as Kyle was wrapping up. “Who wants to swap a gun for a bow and arrow?” Paige was making the offer, but they both carried weapons for the exchange. A ripple of shock went through the larger gang. It was unbelievable that either of these two were offering their weapons, so far they had refused every request to practice with those weapons.
Andrew held out a shotgun. Mason stepped forward, “Good to see you back with the living, Andrew. I’ll let you borrow Angelica because I know you’ll take good care of her.” He then tilted his face down, “You will take good care of her.”
Andrew grinned, “Like she was my own. Back at you about Tina.”
Mason wrapped his hand around the shotgun and began stroking the barrel.
“Hey now, no fondling my girl, Mason,” Andrew looked at him.
“Like my own, that means all kinds of loving and caressing. Pump action. Nice, Andrew,” Mason’s eyes moved from the shotgun to his crossbow. “I’ll see you again soon, princess. In the mean time, take good care of him.” With that he headed back to Dylan and Lily.
“Anyone else?” Paige was holding her bow and quiver. Seth took them from her outstretched hand. “You might want to take a few minutes to get used to the feel. Maybe shoot an arrow or two from up here right before we head down because it’s not as easy as it looks.”
Seth nodded, “Alright. I’ll need a little time to get adjusted to the pressure.”
Satisfied that Seth knew enough to handle her favorite weapon, Paige took his gun and checked the magazine. It was full. “Do you want an extra?” Seth asked.
Paige shook her head, “Naw, there won’t be time to change the clip. I’ll just switch weapons if it runs out.”
“Fair enough,” Seth stretched out his hand to shake hers, “Hey, you guys be careful out there.”
The others murmured the same sentiment. No matter how they felt about the four going in, they all appreciated their bravery. It was really risky running through that many of the monsters, and they were going to be attracting as many as possible.
Paige gave them one of her rare smiles, “You guys, too. Don’t do anything stupid and move quickly. We’ll stop firing once we see you heading in, that way we don’t accidentally hit any of you.”
“I don’t think that’s safe. It’ll be easier for us to keep a lookout on your progress.” Andrew had the most experience, so Paige could not dismiss his opinion. “With that horde, even Mason is going to be pressed to keep up without firing shots.”
Mason heard his name and looked directly at Andrew. He mouthed, “Oh yeah? Is that a challenge?”
Paige did not see this, “Perhaps. Still, we will try to refrain from using guns once you guys go in. We’ll shoot only if necessary.”
“I’ll keep an eye on their progress,” Claire said. As one of the tallest, it made sense.
Kyle looked over the group, “Andrew and I will be in front, Seth and Ben stay at the back, Claire keep moving around so you can see them. Just make sure you don’t get too far ahead or fall behind. Everyone else stay close.”
“Are you set,” Paige was ready to head back to her group. Kyle nodded. “Seth, try some practice shots with that bow; we’ll let you get a couple off before we head down.”
Kyle nodded, “Everyone else, let’s start making our while quietly down the road. No talking.”
With that the teams split up. Kyle’s and company moved toward the back of the road, letting the hill hide them from sight. Seth strolled up the hill with Paige. The larger team stopped halfway down the hill and turned to watch. Seth got down on one knee and practiced pulling the string back. When he was comfortable with it, he strung an arrow. He said something to the four going amid the horde.
“Yeah, we’re ready to put them down!” Mason roared, managing to throw his voice somewhere out in the field.
All heads turned simultaneously to see the zombies’ reaction. That was certainly unexpected, but the reaction was just what they wanted.
Seth notched an arrow, pulled back, and shot, scoring a head shot with the first one. His second was a little wide, nailing the zombie’s neck to the ground, face down. That would work. He shot once more, another head shot, but it was time for him to rejoin his group and for the diversionary team to get going. As they advanced, he moved quickly down the road.
Mason bounded down the hill, sliding on the rocks. When the first two zombies pushed through the trees, he whooped and took them out with the shotgun. Lily was behind on his right, Dylan trying to catch up on his left, and Paige took the rearguard. She fell behind to fire off as many rounds as possible before entering the fray. They could hear all kinds of shouting, mostly Mason, but it was difficult to understand.
Seth tilted his head then snorted, “Leave it to Mason. That wasn’t a battle cry, it was a monologue, you idiot.”
“What?” “What did he do?” “Is everything alright?”
Kyle waved his hand and glared at them, “Shhhh! We’re not clear yet.”
A wheezy groan made everyone look to the left. Vanessa was standing in front of a zombie. Andrew lifted Angelica and was about to fire when he noticed what was in Vanessa’s hands. The zombie crumbled in slow motion at her feet, the left side of its head caved in. Vanessa turned around and noticed her audience. She gave them a thumbs up, a mace in her grip.
“Shit. Thanks, Vanessa.” Kyle shook his head, “See guys? Be quite! And keep eyes in all directions. This isn’t a half-time performance.”
Kyle watched as the majority of zombies shambled and staggered to a
nswer the dinner bell. Occasionally they had to take out a stray, but Andrew managed it without drawing any attention from other passersby. “Well, that worked well. It looks like most of them are out of the way; it’s our turn.” Quietly the large group began trotting along the road. They encountered a couple slow moving zombies, but it was largely uneventful as they passed the dirt parking lot. They paused at the bend leading to the building to make sure the coast was clear before sprinting to the doors.
Mason continued to lead the charge, springing forward from the trees to face the hungry masses. “Friends, Zombies, Former Americans, lend me your ears, or whatever you have left.” He closed in on the nearest group and put the shotgun at eye level. He shot, taking down three who were advancing. “I come to bury you, not to praise you.” He fired again. “The evil that men do lives after them - so shame on all of you!” While he said this, he pushed three more shells into the gun and began firing again. “This is judgment on you all for believing in marriage!” With that he fired off the next three rounds.
From his left, he heard Dylan say, “Shakespeare, huh. I liked your additions. Have to admit I was never much of a fan myself. Thanks for bringing it closer to home.” With that, he darted forward, a semiautomatic mowing down many of the closest zombies. He tried to consistently hit them in the head because the last thing they wanted was to have to watch their feet for hungry mouths.
“Hey, I’m the one giving the speech! You aren’t supposed to just run in while I’m addressing my adoring fans.”
To his right, Lily had two guns drawn and she was firing like a fiend. From behind, Paige shouted, “They’ve rounded the corner and are about to head to the doors.”
Thinking back to Andrew’s comment, Mason muttered, “Who would have trouble handling mindless masses? I don’t need a gun to get this done; they’re even dumber than you lot,” Mason slipped the shotgun into his crossbow carrier and pulled out two katanas. “Now this is so much more interesting. No offense, Tina, you are lovely, don’t get me wrong, but I have always preferred twins.”
Lily shifted to the back as Paige moved forward. Lily pulled out another pair of pistols and kept firing to the sides, avoiding forward shots. Paige pulled out a long, metallic baton and started swinging at the zombie heads as if they were mailboxes. The watermelon sound of each explosion invigorated her, and she thought that she could keep going all day. She lashed out with a long knife in her other hand to keep them from approaching her on that side. On the left, Dylan was ahead. He finished off another magazine while the others caught up to him. He pulled a spear from the weapon collection on his back. He shifted out of the way as Mason roared forward, swords arcing and slicing in an unbelievable rhythm. Unlike a lot of the group, Mason clearly had not learned his skills from video games or fancy classes. He was a talker, but rarely about himself. Dylan envied Mason’s smooth motions and wondered how long it took to learn.
“So Mason, we haven’t seen you in action like this. Why haven’t you ever been this serious before? I mean, we could have used this in Hood River or The Dalles,” Dylan turned his attention back to the zombies in front of him. Mason’s movements were hypnotic.
“Have you ever tried to use one katana in an enclosed space? I thought the point was for everyone to make it out alive. That wouldn’t have happened if I had tried to use my lovely ladies in any of the circumstances you mentioned.” Talking did not seem to distract the guy as he downed a zombie with almost every cut.
Lily glanced over her shoulder, “What do you mean? We are in a tight space now, and you aren’t hitting anything but undead.”
“Well, that my dear Lily, is because I have nothing in front of me but the undead, as far as the arm can reach. In tight spaces, it becomes impossible and dangerous to swing, leaving room for these guys to get close. There are appropriate weapons for close range, so that is what I used. What happened in Hood River was because of general group stupidity, and you can’t expect even my skill to make up for that.”
Lily returned, “That’s a bit harsh considering how many people died there.”
“And if they would have listened to the people in the group with brains, it never would have happened,” Mason shot back.
Dylan broke in, “Guys, one, I agree with Mason. We took horrible losses that should never have happened. Did they get what they deserve? Who cares right now because, two, this is not the time for this discussion. Once we are safely inside that building we can debate it for days. After we all sleep for days. Right now, let’s make sure to keep their attention and keep ourselves alive.”
Despite their conversation, everything was going well. The horde was at bay, although they were closing in now that the group was using closer range weapons. Lily would protect their rear, but the horde was mostly in front of them. Even with the odds, Mason’s skills meant any zombie near him was going to be immobile as soon as the guy noticed it. Dylan and Paige were handling the sides nicely so that they could stay spaced out enough to use their weapons.
Then a sound caught their attention. Mason momentarily stopped his swords, “What the…? Is that the…sprinkler system?”
As if in response, a sprinkler head popped up between his legs, dousing him. The others were soon soaked as well, making it much more difficult to grip their weapons. Lily switched her grip on both guns to protect them from the water. Paige slammed her baton into the ground and used some well-placed kicks to keep zombies away while she tried to pull wet hair out of her face. Dylan got a blast full in the face and stumbled back as he tried to open his eyes. In his rage, Mason slew zombies on both sides, giving Paige and Dylan time to recover.
“This isn’t a frickin’ obstacle course in the mud, I didn’t sign up for this. I’m wearing my favorite pants! I would have changed! And why is this stupid thing even on in winter! How are the sprinklers even working,” he roared as he doubled slashed a couple of zombies who thought they were finally going to get fed. He kicked the next one in the crotch.
From behind him Lily said, “You know even if that did work on the dead, that was a woman.”
Mason put his hands together, drawing the blades in parallel, and plunged them into the stunned zombie’s face, “That works on the living, the dead, men, women, and children.”
Paige picked up her baton and swung at the closest zombie, losing her grip, “Yes, thank you, Mason. That is just what I want to imagine, you driving your swords into a child’s face.” She pulled a long-sword from the straps on her back. It had handle grips so that the water would be less problematic. She worked her way to the baton lying a little out of their square.
“No need to imagine. Look there’s a kid now!” Mason charged forward in the opposite direction, effectively breaking their square on a second side. Dylan had recovered and worked to bring them back together. Mason slid across the now wet ground, cutting the legs off of the zombies between him and his target. Most of the zombies turned to follow him since he made the most noise, shouting in a language that the others didn’t know. The other three cursed and tried to close the gap.
“What is he saying?” Paige asked out of the corner of her mouth.
Lily shrugged, “I only speak English, Spanish, and Mandarin. I don’t have any idea what that is.”
“Why don’t you girls ask him about it after I beat him up for ditching us,” Dylan responded.
From several hundred feet away Mason shouted, “Now you see it moving.” He buried both swords to the hilt before pulling back, “Now you don’t.” Too far, one of the swords was stuck.
“You little brat!” Mason started slashing the free sword at the zombies closing in. He put his foot on the zombie child’s stomach and started trying to push with his foot and pull with his hand. He fell over.
“Nope, no good.” The zombies were closing in faster than his team. Mason bounced to his feet, grabbed the sword, and gave it a good shake before driving it into the ground, zombie still attached at the hilt. “I swear I will be back for you, I swear it on their
graves!” He shouted as he pointed his other katana at the nearby zombies. Pulling a scimitar from his pack, he quickly dispatched the zombies within reach.
“Mason, you wretch! Get back here!” Dylan, Paige, and Lily were holding their own, but it was slow going in the wet grass.
“Fine,” he rolled his eyes. As he closed in, Lily smacked the back of his head. “Now we will close in on your sword so you can retrieve it, but stay with the group. You may be good, but you won’t last forever on your own.”
“Of course I could,” Mason scoffed.
Paige gave a single laugh, “Sure, is that why your swings are slowing down? No, don’t bullshit me, it’s because you are tiring, just like we are.”
“Yeah, ok, maybe I am.” Mason didn’t see any need to lie to these guys. He could tell his movements were a little slower, a little sloppier than a few minutes ago; it was probably obvious to them too. “Where are those jokers? Should it really take them this long? It almost makes me want to curse.”
