Justin continued to study Marianna. He couldn’t read her expression. He picked up his equipment off the ground. “I’d better start warming up.”
Justin started toward the field when Kirk continued, “Marianna and I will be cheering for you on the bleachers. I always rode the bench while you made all the plays anyway.”
Justin chuckled at his friend. “You were a better cheerleader than any of the girls.”
Kirk squinted. “Don’t be comparing me to the cheerleaders.”
Justin laughed and continued toward the field.
“Wonder why Megan didn’t come,” Kirk said to Marianna.
“She’s riding horses with Colt and his niece.”
Marianna’s response sent prickles of jealousy through Justin. Who was this Colt fellow? Megan had never mentioned him. Course, it was nearly every day Justin learned something new about the woman who wouldn’t leave his thoughts. Was she dating this horseback rider? And if she was, why did she kiss Justin, and why did she say she wasn’t interested in a relationship at all?
“Oh, I don’t think so.”
Justin looked up and saw Amy’s husband, Timmy, barreling toward him. Justin sighed. He glanced at the bleachers and for the first time noticed Amy sitting on the bottom row. Her gaze was trained on her husband, and a look of fear marked her face.
He wished he could apologize to Amy. Really apologize. One of her complaints about her husband, besides his constant infidelity, had been his volatile temper and willingness to make a scene when he was mad.
Justin looked at Timmy, who was now only a few yards away from him. The man obviously hadn’t changed. Trying to settle the guy down, Justin extended his hand. “I don’t want any trouble, Timmy.”
Fire seemed to shoot from Timmy’s eyes. His face had morphed through more shades of red than Justin thought possible. It had been a few years since Justin had to use his fists to calm a fellow down. Admittedly it was because Justin had stolen away the guy’s girlfriend. But if he had to defend himself, he would.
“You don’t want any trouble?” Timmy spat through his teeth. “What are you doing here?”
Justin pointed to the baseball bag. “Came to play ball.”
Timmy pointed to the dark blue T-shirt Justin wore. It didn’t say the church’s name on it, like Timmy’s did, as Justin had been late to join, but it matched in color. “Play for my church.” He pointed to his chest. “Oh no. I don’t think so.”
Justin wondered where Timmy had been during the afternoon practice on Sunday. If he’d shown up then, they could have gotten past this with a little more privacy. He knew Timmy felt he should move on to another church, but he’d probably run out of places to worship if he had to avoid every woman from his past. No. He wouldn’t leave. He’d sinned. There were consequences for those sins, but he’d also changed.
Amy had been willing to forgive Timmy. He didn’t understand why Timmy felt what happened between her and Justin was any different.
“What’s going on guys?”
Justin looked to his right. He hadn’t noticed Pastor Wes stood beside him.
Timmy motioned to Justin. “He’s not playing with us.”
Pastor Wes nodded. “Yes he is.”
Timmy squinted. “Do you know who he is?”
Justin balled his fists. He’d had just about enough. He was trying to be patient with the guy. Understood why the man wouldn’t want to hang out. Even understood why the guy didn’t want Justin around his wife. But this needed to be hashed out in private. Not after a church service and not before a church ball game.
Pastor Wes nodded again. “Yes, Timmy. I do know who he is, and he’s playing on our team. God’s changed his life. Just as he changed yours.”
Timmy’s expression blanched, and for a moment, Justin thought the pastor’s words had gotten through to the man. His jaw tightened and his face hardened again. He pointed to his chest. “If he stays, I leave.”
“He’s staying.”
Timmy glared from Pastor Wes to Justin then back to the pastor. He shoved his glove under his arm. “Fine.”
He stomped toward the dugout, picked up his gear, and motioned to Amy. She hopped off the bleachers and hustled behind him.
Justin frowned at Pastor Wes. “I’m really sorry about that. I could leave. He has reason to hate me.”
Pastor Wes stroked his goatee as he peered at Justin. “Justin, I counseled Timmy and Amy before their divorce. I counseled Amy through the divorce. She spent nights at our house with my wife comforting her, encouraging her in the Lord. I know exactly who you are and what you’ve done.”
Embarrassment swelled from the pit of his stomach to the top of his head. The ugliness of his own sin that Jesus washed away flooded him anew. The reality of all he’d done hit him in spurts, like when he was confronted with someone who’d hurt from his past actions. Sometimes the reality overwhelmed him. Like now.
It was the reason he studied Paul so thoroughly. Paul claimed to be the chief of all sinners. Justin would argue he was worse than Paul. Still, Justin related to the apostle from scripture. He knew what it was to be the worst of men and then be changed.
“A lot of the sin heaped on Christ on that cross came from me.”
Pastor Wes patted his shoulder. “Me, too, brother. But we don’t have time for a share fest.” He nudged Justin toward the field. “Let’s go warm up.”
Justin followed the pastor to the team. They were tossing balls back and forth. This church team was not going to be anything like the last team he played for in college. Several of the players were over fifty and some well over two hundred pounds. These were just a bunch of members getting together to have a good time.
Brian, one of the guys who’d been at the Sunday practice, motioned to him. “Wanna catch?”
“Sure.” Justin picked up a ball and tossed it to Brian. He caught it and threw it back.
“Heard you went to Bible study Thursday night.”
“Yep.”
“I’ll be there this week.” He pointed to two guys a ways across the field. “Rick and Mike, too. Had to miss ‘cause of a make-up game. Guess you already know that.”
“That’s what Kat said.”
Brian’s face turned red, and Justin wondered if he and the teacher had a bit of a thing going. Brian changed the subject. “I’m glad you came. We need more players.”
“Looks like you lost one when I came.”
Brian didn’t comment, and Justin wondered if he and Timmy were friends. Maybe it really aggravated him to be warming up with Justin instead of Amy’s husband.
Brian threw the ball again. “I’ve been praying for Timmy. He’s having a hard time. Just lost his job.”
Justin didn’t respond, but he felt for the guy. A lot of people had been losing their jobs. Caused stress on the families. Made people angry. Course, Justin understood why Timmy was angry with him. Justin had no notion of being friends with the guy and his wife. It wouldn’t be proper. Even though their divorce had been final when Justin dated Amy, he’d crossed a line that couldn’t be uncrossed.
But he couldn’t avoid everyone he’d ever known before becoming a Christian. He’d have to move to another state, and he didn’t feel God asking him to do that. No. He’d stay in Lexington. Live his life now for the Lord. And deal with consequences of his past as they came. Like dealing with Timmy.
Something in his heart twisted, and he felt an urge to pray for Timmy and Amy. After a quick silent prayer, he inwardly committed to keep them in his daily petitions. They would never be friends, but he could still pray for them.
Brian passed the ball again. “Can you play shortstop?”
Justin threw the ball back and shrugged. It wasn’t his strongest position. In fact, with all the bending and squatting involved, and having not played for years, he felt pretty confident he’d be downright atrocious in the position. But he’d do what was needed. “Sure. If that’s where you need me.”
Brian caught the ball and tossed it into
his gloves a few times. “Well, I know you’re better as pitcher, but Timmy was shortstop, and all the other guys haven’t really played it or are too out of shape.” Brian elbowed one of the overweight older guys beside him.
The guy, Jerry, puffed out his chest and sucked in his gut. “Who you calling overweight?” He rubbed the top of his bald head. “And I ain’t old.”
Justin and Brian laughed.
Jerry guffawed as he shook his finger in the air. “Your day’s coming, boys.” He patted his belly. “It takes years to build up this physique, but it comes just the same.”
Justin laughed again. Jerry was probably the same age as his dad, and the senior Frasure was most likely in better shape than Justin. He had to be, chasing after all the women Justin’s age.
A thought traipsed through his mind. If he wasn’t spending his senior years chasing women, if he was settled down, would he allow himself to put on a little weight? Embrace losing his hair? Would he be happy like that?
As those thoughts weaved through Justin’s mind, Jerry’s wife jogged out onto the field with a cold bottle of water. The slightly plump, graying woman handed it to him then rose on tiptoes to kiss his cheek.
An older version of Megan flashed through his mind. He might downright enjoy seeing her jog out to bring him water and kiss his cheek. If she looked at Justin as Jerry’s wife had looked at him, he wouldn’t mind if she added a few pounds and a bit of gray splashed through her hair.
He pushed the thought away. He needed to focus on baseball. The game was about to start. Making his way to the dugout, he glanced over to the stands. He wondered if Megan attended the games. Obviously she didn’t. Besides, Marianna said she’d gone horseback riding with some guy named Colt.
The idea still grated on his nerves. He needed to push this fancy toward his secretary out of his mind. It wasn’t time. Maybe a year from now. Once he was stronger in his faith. He spent time in the Word every day, but he still worried he’d mess up.
He glanced at Marianna and Kirk. The woman watched him, a look of wariness in her expression. He knew she’d seen the exchange between him and Timmy. He wondered how much she’d heard. He wondered what Megan had shared with her.
He wanted to defend himself to Megan’s look-alike, to tell her he was different than his reputation. That he wouldn’t be unkind to her sister. That he cared about her.
He shook his head. What was he thinking? Only moments ago, he admitted he needed nothing to do with a relationship with any woman. And his constant thoughts about Megan made her an even worse possibility.
The feel of her lips against his pressed on his mind. Why it haunted him he didn’t know. It made no sense. He just wanted to stop thinking about it. He looked around the field. He needed this game to get going. He watched the players from the other team take the field. If the game didn’t hurry up and start, he was going to have to do something. Run around the field. Punch a wall. Something. His hands itched for movement. His feet tapped against the ground. He couldn’t take it any longer.
The umpire shouted, “Play ball!”
Relief washed over Justin. He had something to occupy his mind.
Chapter 11
One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart that you can’t utter.
JAMES EARL JONES
Colt rode his steed at a slower pace than Megan and Hadley. Thunderbolt would have been happy to ride at a faster pace, and truth be told, Colt wouldn’t have minded riding alongside Megan. But he held back.
“There is this one guy.”
Colt perked up at Hadley’s words. She was in sixth grade. Boys should still have cooties.
“Tell me about him,” answered Megan.
“He’s mean to me. He pushed me into the locker. Told me I was ugly.”
Anger balled in Colt’s gut. A teacher should have been around to witness a boy pushing his niece. He’d have to make a trip to the middle school. He blew out a breath. School was almost out, and Hadley had gotten mad at him several times for sticking his nose in her business.
Megan laughed, and he frowned. His niece’s mistreatment was hardly cause for happiness. Her voice was light. “I remember when boys used to do that. Next thing I knew they wanted to be my boyfriend.”
Colt leaned back in the saddle and smiled. Now that he thought about it, he’d picked on a cute blond in middle school. Emily Watson. She’d been a full three inches taller than him and wore the same red shirt every day. He’d pinched her, even poked her with his pencil to get her attention. She’d run off and told the teacher, and he’d had to stay in during break.
“I don’t think he wants to be my boyfriend,” said Hadley.
“I bet he does, but since it sounds like he’s not being very kind, I’d ignore him if I were you.”
“I can’t. He sits behind me in science.”
“Ask to be moved.”
Hadley shifted in the saddle. “She’ll get mad at me.”
“Trust me. I know the teacher. She won’t.”
Colt grinned as he recalled the science teacher was Megan’s twin.
“You wanna race?” asked Hadley.
“Definitely.”
Before Hadley could say, “Go,” Megan shot off. Colt laughed as Hadley shouted, “No fair.”
Colt laughed as she kicked Fairybelle in the haunches and took off after her piano teacher. Megan handled the boy discussion well. He would have threatened to call the school, and Hadley would have thrown a fit, and they’d have battled for the rest of the day. Already, the situation was nearly resolved.
He thought of Megan sitting with Hadley on the piano bench. He’d forced himself to stay close while Megan taught the second lesson of the week. The memories of Mama playing niggled at him once again, but he’d determined to keep himself inside and listen.
Hadley already loved Megan McKinney. She’d talked about little else since the lesson on Saturday. Even wanted to know what church she attended, thinking Colt might take her for a visit. The girl needed a woman in her life. He knew the time was coming when she’d have personal questions Colt wouldn’t know how to answer. If he even knew the answers.
Hadley and Fairybelle beat Megan and Daisy with ease. Of course, it wasn’t really a fair race. Daisy was the most laidback horse he owned. Docile. A bit past her prime.
With it being so long since Megan had ridden a horse, he didn’t want to chance one with too much spunk. Though watching her now, he was pretty sure she could handle Thunderbolt if he let her. She’d been right. Horseback riding must be like riding a bike. Something one never forgot.
The girls slowed their pace, and soon Colt had caught up with them. He glanced at Megan. Her hair blew around her face, and her cheeks were deep pink and her eyes bright from the exertion of the ride. She sucked in a deep breath and looked at Hadley. “You beat me.”
Hadley grabbed the reins in one hand and swatted the air. “Of course. Was there any doubt?”
Colt laughed at his niece’s teasing. “I reckon it would have been a fairer race if we’d given her a horse that could hold a candle to Fairybelle.”
Daisy whinnied, and Colt reached over and petted her neck. “You’re a good girl, Daisy. But truth is truth.”
This time Megan and Hadley laughed. Colt drank in the sincerity of Megan’s expressions. She enjoyed this ride through his land.
A real country girl at heart. Someone who thrived on breathing in the land God created.
Hadley guided her horse to the left. “Let’s go this way.”
“What’s this way?” Megan asked.
Colt didn’t respond. He knew Hadley had prepared a surprise for her piano teacher. He’d been thrilled with the idea when his niece suggested it. Give him more time to talk to the woman.
“You’ll see,” said Hadley.
The trail thinned between trees and bushes, and Colt moved behind Megan with Hadley taking the lead. He sucked in the delicious smells of late spring. With June just around the corner, the land had been full
y replenished with spring showers and mid-May sunshine.
He was proud of his land. It boasted some of the richest soil in all of Kentucky. He raised strong, healthy cattle, always turning a good profit when time came to sell. And his horses were some of the best in the nation. He’d had five make it to the Kentucky Derby, and he rarely wanted for investors to buy a filly or a steed from him.
Yes. God had been good to him. True, he’d inherited the land. It was his grandfather’s father who’d done the hardest work, starting the farm from next to nothing. He had gone to an early grave, having put so much blood, sweat, and tears into this land.
But Colt had done good by the land as well. Even got his degree in agriculture. He knew what to grow, when, and how. He’d plotted the land into sections, placing cattle and horses in the best areas at the best times, all the while allowing each section a rest after a few years of labor of keeping up livestock and vegetation.
The land would be here long after him. It was his duty before God to care for it properly, and he’d always done just that. He’d been a good son to his parents. Done right. Not been a burden. They’d gone to their graves knowing the land would be cared for. Now it was Colt’s responsibility to ensure the next generation took pride in the land as well.
He looked up at Hadley. She cared for the land and for the animals. But she didn’t really know farmwork. She knew rodeos and barrel racing, how to care for horses. But not cattle and crops. Besides, he kinda wanted to be able to pass the farm on to a son. One who would carry on the Baker name.
To do that, he’d need a wife. One who served God and wasn’t afraid of hard work. One who’d uphold the family’s good name. His gaze shifted to Megan.
“We’re almost there,” Hadley called from the front.
He couldn’t wait to see Megan’s face. Confident Hadley’s scheme was one the piano teacher would appreciate. The trees thickened, and he pushed a bush away from his foot. The land opened up, and he saw the clearing. An old oak tree with a swing tied to one of the strongest branches sat beside his favorite pond.
He looked at Megan, wanting to note her first reaction. Her eyes opened wide as she scanned the land. He knew it was a breathtaking sight, and the expression on her face said all he’d expected. She loved it.
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