Her voice caught on a sob. “I…I’ve known who I am since early yesterday morning. I wanted everything to settle down before I told you, and I needed to make sure you loved me so I wouldn’t lose you.” A sudden thought occurred to her, threatening to stop her heart. “Oh, Jake, if you know I’m Tess, then you know about Talbot.”
“Yes, I do.”
Menson’s front door opened, and Henry stuck his head around the screen. “Jake, hate to bother you—”
“Then don’t. I’m busy right now, Henry.”
“Some man hopped the last sleigh able to make it from Shadow Pine. I guess they had a rough time and almost didn’t get here. He’s over at your office waiting to speak to you.”
“I’m busy. Tell him I’m unavailable.”
“He’s insistent.”
Tess shook her head. “Go. He’s probably desperate for a job. I’ll stop by the office in a bit. I need to get my things if I’m going to be staying with Echo.”
He stepped closer. “Will you be all right?”
She was so confused. Who was most in the wrong? Jake, who knew she might not be Fedelia Yardley? Or she, for knowing the truth and shamelessly going after him when she was betrothed to Talbot?
She would have to answer to God for her actions, but Jake had all but lied about her identity for months, to everyone, and that she didn’t think she could forgive. If he’d only been truthful, all of this might have been avoided.
“At the moment, I don’t think I’ll ever be all right again, Jake.”
28
Dawn slowly lit the sky. Rays of sunshine topped the rim of the pines and blanketed the camp, promising a clear day, when Tess opened the door to Jake’s office. At the moment, she didn’t care about her appearance or even that she needed to hurry back to Echo. All she could think about was that she had been betrayed by the man who meant the most to her.
André glanced up when she stepped in on a cold rush of wind. His expression this morning was masked.
“Ma chère. We have been waiting for you.”
“Good morning, André. Jake.” Her eyes skipped immediately to Big Say, who didn’t look an ounce better than she did. Suddenly, her heart shattered in tiny pieces. She longed to kiss away the anguish she so clearly recognized in the slump of his shoulders, in his rumpled appearance. For once, he didn’t have the last word. He stood at the window, his back turned to her, lost in the sunrise.
She took a step toward him before she noticed that another man was sitting in the room. She paused and focused on the city clothes, the new hat, and the high-buttoned shoes with bulldog toes. She blinked twice, trying to adjust to the bright light. Talbot? He was here? She looked up when he slowly rose from his chair and extended his hand, relief evident in his eyes.
“Tess. Thank God.”
He was really here, standing right in front of her. She couldn’t believe her eyes. He cautiously took a step toward her, both his hands extended now as though he feared she might dissolve in a mist.
“I was afraid to believe it…even though I’ve dreamed of this moment. I never abandoned hope that you were the one who survived. Thank You, God. Thank You!”
Joyful tears rolled from his eyes and streamed off the tip of his nose. Tess withered inside. Talbot had forged his way through the icy Michigan woods to find her. She glanced expectantly at André, who kept his head down and remained silent. Her gaze shifted to Jake. His broad back, tense now, partially blocked the golden rays of sun streaming through the windowpanes.
She thought of the arms that had engulfed her so dearly not long ago on Menson’s front porch. Welcoming arms, tender, loving arms, the exact arms she wanted to hold her forever. She could forgive him anything. “Jake?” she prompted softly.
He slowly turned, and her heart throbbed when she witnessed the raw torment that filled his eyes. Please, no… her gaze mutely pleaded. Love me enough to fight for me.
Jake’s answer was barely audible. “Tess… I’m sorry.”
It was his tone that told her. It was over. She used the pain inside to fill her eyes, and beseech him to not let her go this easily. “There’s nothing more you want to say?” she whispered.
Reaching for his coat, he pulled it on and left the office. A cold wind from the open door swept her, chilling her bones.
“Tess, my love, I know this is upsetting,” Talbot said quietly. “Mr. Lannigan has explained about your memory loss—”
“Ma chère… he does not know what he says,” André consoled. “He is angry with himself.”
Lifting her eyes to the man she was to marry, she said in a flat voice, “Talbot, I want to go home.”
He sprang to assist her. “Of course, my love. I’ll arrange for a sled. Once you’re back in Philadelphia we can put this whole unfortunate episode behind us.”
André cleared his throat. “I am not sure a sleigh will make it back to Shadow Pine. Though the snow has stopped, the roads will be very dangerous.”
“I want to go now, André,” she murmured, still dazed by Jake’s rejection. “Can you arrange for the sled promptly?”
Addressing André, Talbot said, “Please, do as the lady asks.” He turned back to Tess. “Pack your things. The sled will be waiting. We’ll be detained in Shadow Pine for a few days until the train is running again.”
“I don’t have anything, Talbot. I only have Fedelia Yardley’s personal effects.” She brushed by André on her way out. “Please tell Echo I love her and that I will send for her soon. She can visit me in Philadelphia…” She paused, tears rolling down her cheeks. “Will you purchase a train ticket for her, André? I will reimburse you…”
“Oui, ma chère. I will take good care of your friend until she can join you.”
“Someone needs to notify Bernice. She’ll have to fill in for me.”
André nodded. “This I will do, but I will not enjoy it.”
“Oh…” she paused, blinking tears. “I’ve made each of the WASPS a small gift—Coburn bonnets. Will you see that they get them?” At the last moment she had discarded frivolous in favor of common sense. The bonnets stacked in her room were colorful and practical, and she was sure the women would love them.
“This is most kind of you, mademoiselle.”
“And don’t muss them, André. They’re serviceable but delicate.” She didn’t know a woman alive who didn’t appreciate a little oomph in her fashion.
“Oui.”
Tess opened the door, wrapped her scarf around her neck tighter, and led Talbot out of the office.
Jake stood on a high ledge and watched the big sled pull out of camp. He’d felt pain before—the bite of the ax, frostbitten toes and fingers, night sweats, and even a concussion one winter—but the hurt inside him now overrode anything he’d ever experienced.
Why had he done that to her?
Tip’s voice rang in his mind. They had been crosscut-sawing one afternoon on the south rim when the man first mentioned his beloved granddaughter. He’d voiced how he’d missed out on much of her life because of his thirst for adventure. And it worried Tip.
Giving Jake a history lesson, Tip had told him that back in the day, men and women came by canal boats, paddle steamers, sloops, wagon trains, and clipper ships, looking for limitless stands of the coveted pinus strobus—that lofty, graceful, aromatic evergreen known as the eastern white pine.
Still a young man, he had barely been eking out a living for his family on a small piece of land in the Midwest when timber fever spread like wildfire across the eastern states. Jake could still see Rutherford’s powerful arms pulling the crosscut saw back and forth. He’d loved that old man.
That had been years ago, but now he loved another Wakefield. His eyes followed the sled carrying Tess away. At one time he thought he loved the pine more than he could ever love anything. Now he knew he was wrong. He loved Tess more than life itself.
Are You paying me back, God? Should I have done more? Talked less? Worked harder?
For twenty years he
’d taken part in the land’s desecration. When he was a boy of fourteen, J. Basil Lannigan had set him behind a pair of Percherons, and he’d worked as a teamster, dragging logs out of the woods to the skid ways. He was taught how to build roads and how to use an ax and a crosscut saw. He’d worked at every job in the timber field, from pin whacker to ink slinger, and he’d learned his job well.
He’d worked as hard as any man, saying little and trying to ignore what was being done to the earth, but it was clear to him that no one cared what was happening, certainly not his father or the men whose livelihoods depended on the pine. But the day came when Jake took a long, hard look around him and could no longer avoid the appalling truth.
The land was being savaged in a cold, callous, premeditated act, and he knew he could no longer, in good conscience, ignore his responsibilities to his future children and his children’s children. He ached for something to offset the madness systematically destroying the countryside.
He had tried to get his father to understand what was happening, but he’d failed. J. Basil refused to see the problem.
Around that time Jake had heard Rutherford’s son was killed in an accident and the man was looking for a foreman. Still clinging to the hope that he could persuade at least one timber baron of the madness of the destruction, he had left Lannigan Timber to accept a job with Wakefield.
The decision to leave his father’s business had been a painful one, but at least Rutherford had taken the time to hear what he had to say. Tip had sat before the fire one cold night, quietly listening as Jake explained his dream of planting acres of young pine to give new life to a dying land.
When he finished, Rutherford knocked the ashes out of his pipe before repacking it from the tobacco can sitting beside his chair. “Your dream is a mighty tall order, son.”
“I know, sir, but it can be done.”
Rutherford’s eyes had studied the young man before him, and Jake recalled the smile that fixed at the corners of his mouth.
“I don’t doubt that you can achieve whatever you desire. This is a dream for all mankind. A dream God would approve of.”
Jake recalled the rush of relief he’d felt after Rutherford’s quiet acceptance. For the first time in years, he felt a resurgence of hope that the pine madness might begin to subside. “Then you’ll authorize me to begin replanting?”
The old man nodded. “I’ve taken more than my share from the land. Together, we’ll see that the pine lives on. Once a stand is cut, you put a crew to replanting what we’ve taken.”
Months later, Tip had mentioned his granddaughter again. “It’s a real shame my Tess can’t marry a man like you, Jake. Her mother took her off to the city when she was young. She’s about to marry the son of a wealthy carriage maker. I guess he’s good enough—but I worry about her.”
“She’s your granddaughter, Tip. She’ll do fine.”
And then, just a few weeks after that, while trying to bring a skid of logs out of the woods, Rutherford had keeled over dead, and Jake’s hope for the future dimmed. And now it was gone, and with it the only woman he’d ever loved.
He could go after her. Nothing was stopping him—except for the knowledge that she belonged to another man. She once accused him of having too much integrity. He supposed she was right, as she’d been so often.
Integrity. The notion got a little tight when practiced, but he knew the word’s meaning. A firm adherence to a code of moral or artistic values. Honesty.
And Tess had honestly never belonged to him.
29
Tess stared out the window of the coach. She was on her way back from another endless shopping expedition. Philadelphia had much to offer: restaurants, haberdasheries, exquisite seamstresses, and store-bought clothing fit for royalty.
“Are you comfortable, my dear?”
“Yes, Talbot, thank you.”
He smiled paternally, and she was glad when he turned his attention to her friend, who sat with her nose pressed eagerly against the carriage window.
“And you, Echo? Is there anything I can do for you?”
“No, sir, Mr. Wellington-Kent. You’ve done too much for me already.”
“Call me Talbot, please, and it’s entirely my good fortune to have two such beautiful ladies under my protection.”
Tess’s wan smile did little to encourage his compliments, and her attention strayed back to the passing scenery. The events of the past few weeks had rendered her numb. Learning that she was Tess Wakefield and not Fedelia Yardley had come as a shock, but it was Jake’s releasing her to Talbot so easily that she found so heartbreaking.
A hysterical giggle rose in her throat, but she quickly forced it down. If Jake Lannigan had wanted to hurt her, he had certainly accomplished his goal. The knowledge that he was willing to let her marry another man was beyond the realm of punishment.
She promised herself one thing. She would never again be the same trusting, gullible fool Jake had proven her to be. Even his quietly spoken, humble apology had done little to ease her hurt. If he had so much as hinted that he wanted—needed—her to stay, she would have swallowed what remained of her pride and broken Talbot’s heart.
If only Jake had taken her into his arms and assured her that his words were not a lie, that he loved her without remorse, she would have forgiven him.
Biting her lower lip until she tasted blood, she vowed she would not let Talbot see her cry again. The poor man had listened to her sobs, showing her incredible patience, even though he’d completely misunderstood the reason for her abject misery.
Had he noticed the love in her eyes when she’d looked at Jake Lannigan that last morning? If so, he had far too much breeding to question her about it, and he had gone out of his way to console her, sending for Echo as soon as the roads were clear enough for safe travel. The young woman could stay for as long as she wanted. Talbot had been most gracious.
Get a grip on yourself, Tess! Her self-control was on another downhill slide. A sob escaped her, bringing Talbot and Echo’s conversation to an abrupt halt.
Echo leaned over and cooed sympathetically. Talbot quickly extracted his handkerchief from his breast pocket. “Your emotions are clearly askew, dearest. Don’t despair. The doctor assures me you will be better soon. You’ve had quite a disquieting experience.”
“Thank you. You’re too good to me, Talbot.” Tears spilled down her cheeks.
Tess saw Talbot and Echo exchange helpless looks, but she couldn’t stop her emotions from welling up inside. Leaning forward, Talbot placed his hand over her fingers. Staring at his hand, she was reminded how different his slender, pale fingers were from Jake’s large, nut-brown, work-callused hands.
“I know how much all of this has upset you, but soon you will resume your normal life, and then I’m certain you’ll find joy again.” Talbot peered at her hopefully. “Do you remember your former life in Philadelphia, Tess?”
She nodded. “It’s coming back in bits and pieces.”
“Then you will not think of your accident. And you will enjoy life as you did before.”
Talbot had spent hours filling her in on her childhood. Her mother had married a lumberjack when she was seventeen. The love of her life had died when a logging chain tangled with his foot and dragged him to his death when Tess was three. Her grief was too much for her mother, and she blamed the timber industry and Tip for Hugh’s death. Tip sent his only daughter and grandchild to a second cousin in Philadelphia, where she lived until pneumonia took her life seven years ago. Tip then appointed Talbot her legal guardian until she reached the age of eighteen, and two years after that the young carriage maker had asked her to marry him—but the information wasn’t new. She recalled it all. She remembered the past, but now it bore no relevance to the future.
He hesitantly withdrew his hand, drawing in a deep breath as he settled back against the seat. “Well, you’re not to be concerned. I will see that you have the finest physicians money can buy. I’m sure the superb medical faciliti
es we have at our disposal will help to see you through this crisis, and the moment you find a ring you fancy, we’ll replace the lost one.”
Tess’s tearful gaze fell on the bare third finger of her left hand, and she vaguely recalled the engagement ring she had been wearing the day she’d left for Wakefield Timber.
“I’m sorry about your ring, Talbot.”
“My dear, material possessions are the least of my worries. My only concern is that you are well and happy.” Turning back to Echo, he smiled. “And we’re going to provide both you and Tess with new clothes, young lady. Entire wardrobes. Coats, hats, shoes, dresses, lingerie, and anything else your heart desires. You and Tess shall make a holiday of touring the dressmakers to your hearts’ content!”
“Oh, I don’t know what to say, Mr. Wellington-Kent. I know I’m going to wake up tomorrow morning and find that this has all been an exciting dream!”
Tess’s friend was in complete awe of the generous man. Talbot had taken to Echo immediately, and they had formed a close bond in a short time. She listened as they began to rattle on about the proposed shopping expedition as if they were two children planning a day at the circus together.
She sighed, returning her gaze to the window. Talbot was little more than a polite stranger lately, yet in a matter of weeks she would be his wife. The day they left Michigan, he had informed her that once they reached Philadelphia, after a reasonable time of adjustment, their wedding would proceed as planned. The unnerving thought brought the handkerchief to the corners of her eyes again. She should be grateful that such a man of wealth and prestige would still want her for his wife.
Through the past few dark days, she had found Talbot to be an honorable and gentle man. He had stood by her, permitting her to lean on him when her world had fallen apart. If only he knew that what she really ached for was Jake to take her into his arms and beg for her forgiveness—but Jake had left Talbot to dry her tears of disbelief.
When Love Comes My Way Page 21
