Grey stared at me for what seemed like forever before he said, “Please tell me you’re jokin’.”
I recoiled a bit. “Why would I joke about that?”
“He never told me. Not once. That’s huge, Clara. Horrible. And it’s somethin’ you share with someone you’re supposed to be close with.” Grey was livid – I could practically see the steam coming out of his ears.
“I think we’ve already established that he wasn’t the same person I once knew,” I replied softly. “I think it makes sense that he didn’t tell you that.”
Makes sense…right.
If Grey knew the truth…
“Why? Who was he to you? What kind of man was he? You’re obviously scared out of your mind of him. Even in his death, you’re freaked. Why did Stacy’s resemblance to you cause you to run to the bathroom and vomit?”
I plopped my wineglass on the table and stood, panicking. “This chat is over.”
He did see too much.
I knew it!
I just didn’t expect him to be so forthright in his questioning.
He followed my lead and came at me, catching my hand before I could get too far away from him. He cupped my chin and tilted my face up to his, his eyes roaming. “What secrets do you have built up in that fortress of yours?”
“You don’t need to know, Grey.”
Why wasn’t I kicking him out or running away?
Why didn’t I want to?
Why did his touch feel good?
“I do.”
“Why?”
“There are reasons.”
“You said that already.” My voice broke.
Damn it!
The day had finally melted away as I enjoyed my time with him, but now, he was breaking me apart again.
“I did. And I am gonna tell you.”
“Then do it,” I challenged.
Anger was better than falling apart, and I was starting to feel pretty angry with this runaround he was giving me.
He let me go and took a step back, leaving me reeling. “Sit. I need to tell you somethin’.”
My knees were already trembling, so they gave out easily as I fell back onto the couch. “What?”
I needed this over. Whatever he was going to tell me would be miniscule to what I faced today or in the past. I could do this, I told myself.
I didn’t believe it for a second.
“You know that I spoke with Galen.”
That was not what I was expecting.
“Yes, I know.”
Why did he mention Galen? What did Galen have to do with anything?
He downed the rest of his wine and sat the empty glass aside. He leaned in so that our faces were close, so very, very close. I could feel his breath fan my face. I had to stop myself from quivering for a different reason other than fear of the unknown.
“I was gonna tell you somethin’ on the phone that first night, but you hung up on me. I needed to tell you somethin’, Clara – somethin’ really important. I told Galen, and he asked me not mention it to you ’til tomorrow. I didn’t understand it, but he convinced me that it was for the best.”
Dread pooled in my belly.
Why would Galen do that?
What was it that Galen didn’t want me to know?
That wasn’t like him.
Grey continued, oblivious to my inner turmoil. “He said to wait ’til we knew for sure. I tried to listen to him, Clara. I really did. But I feel like if I let you walk into that office tomorrow mornin’ and you find out, you’ll hate us all. Even Galen. You’ve had too many surprises sprung on you today, darlin’.”
“What is going on, Grey?” I jumped up and took two steps away from the couch. “What aren’t you telling me?”
He stood as well and pulled his phone from his pocket.
Is he making a call in the middle of this?
Really?
My anger started to build once more, but then I heard him speak. “Sam?” He paused, listening. “Yeah. Head on back. We’re waitin’.” He slipped his phone back in his pocket and stared at me. “Give me two minutes and you’ll understand. I don’t wanna do this to you, Clara. I don’t understand why this would hurt you – and I’m under the impression that it will.”
I wrapped my arms around myself, rubbing my arms. “Just tell me.”
“It’s probably better to see.” Concern and determination exuded from him.
“I…what? Why? Why is this going to hurt me? What is it?”
I was racking my brain, trying to understand, but I didn’t get it. Nothing made sense unless Jonathan was alive and was about to try to murder me…again.
I jumped when a knock sounded at the door. I was quaking, scared out of my mind.
Grey moved swiftly toward the door and opened it. I heard him say something to Sam, but the large expanse of his back blocked my view of her. His body dipped a bit, and it looked as if he took a load into his arms.
What did Sam give him?
Was this about Jonathan leaving me something?
Grey took two steps backward and closed the door with his foot. As he turned slowly, I saw a pile of blankets in his arms.
I blinked.
Blankets?
What did he need with blankets?
Then the blankets moved.
A sound came from under the pile blankets.
I took a step back.
No.
No!
“Clara,” Grey whispered. He peered down at his burden and bounced it. “I’d like you to meet your niece.”
My chin wobbled and tears welled in my eyes.
Niece.
Jonathan had a baby girl?
Oh, my God!
My trembling hands covered my mouth to keep my wail inside. My body shuddered, the vibrating anxiety worsening.
“Clara?”
“I don’t understand!” I cried, tears streaming down my face. “Why? Why?!”
“Come here, Clara.” Grey was so calm, so gentle. “Come meet her.”
I took another step backward.
Grey didn’t understand. He didn’t understand what seeing that baby would do to me.
“Please, Clara. She needs you. You’re all she has left in the world.”
It was like Moses parting the Red Sea, and my emotions and my confusion separated, leaving behind only Grey’s words.
You’re all she has left.
I wiped my mouth and attempted to dry my eyes. “Grey?” I didn’t know how to do this.
Seeing this, he whispered, “Just walk to me, Clara. It’s okay. Just come see her.” His voice was smooth, comforting.
I took one step…and then another, until I was finally in front of him. I stared at Grey’s face, not at my niece. I couldn’t see her just yet.
How dare Galen take this decision from me! How dare he try to keep her from me! I was livid with him, and yet, at the same time, I was so scared of what I was about to see.
“Look down, darlin’. You’ve gotta see her eyes. It was the first thing I noticed about you – there hers.”
My breath caught.
Mine?
I had to look.
I had to!
My eyes went from Grey’s to his nose, to his chin, down his throat and chest…and then I finally saw her. She was half asleep, her eyes tired, and her lashes fluttered as she fought to stay awake. My eyes. They were mine. A corner of her mouth dribbled with a bit of milk. I wiped it away with my thumb while looking over her adorable features and short, fine blonde hair. She smiled and cooed and then raised her fists, stretching them with a yawn.
And I fell in love.
My heart was gone.
Completely.
It now belonged to this precious angel.
“Oh.” I smiled, and then I cried again. “Oh, God! She’s me. She looks exactly like my baby pictures!” I peered up and found Grey smiling broadly. “She’s beautiful.”
“Yeah…just like her auntie.” He winked.
“What�
�s her name?” I wanted to know everything. No matter what Jonathan did, he made this, and she was precious. She didn’t deserve any hate. She was innocent.
“Bella Rose.”
It felt like a knife stabbed me in the belly, and I stumbled back, snarling, “What did you just say?”
I couldn’t believe it.
Grey appeared worried. “Bella Rose.”
“He named her Bella?”
He shifted from one foot to the other, unsure. “Uh, yeah…”
I turned and fisted my hair.
Of course he named her Bella. He had a wife exactly like me. I should have known!
Goddamn you, Jonathan! I hope you rot in hell!
“She’s named after you,” Grey whispered.
“And you see why I have a problem with that?”
He let out a frustrated breath. “Yes and no. I don’t understand, but I know somethin’ is up. I can’t know unless you tell me, which we’ve already established you aren’t willin’ to. But Bella doesn’t need to be the one that pays the price, Clara.”
He was right about that. Bella didn’t deserve that.
I felt like I was back in La-La Land again.
Then something else entirely poured over me, and I spun around. “Why didn’t Galen want me to know? What is going on?”
And then it hit me.
I was the only living relative Bella had.
Oh, holy shit.
It fell to me to raise her.
She was mine.
“I see that you understand now,” Grey stated as he watched me.
Bella let out a cry, so Grey soothed her as I got my head on straight. I didn’t know anything about babies. I’d never been around them. How was I supposed to raise one?
Paige!
Paige would help me. I could take Bella back to Chicago, and Paige would be there every step of the way. I knew she would if I asked.
Wait?!
Was I considering this? Was I actually considering raising a child? My brother’s child?
Yes. Yes, I was.
I’d never have any children of my own, thanks to Jonathan, and now he gave me one. It wasn’t the way he’d wanted, but she was mine nonetheless.
“Are you okay?” Grey asked, observing me as he rocked her to sleep.
“No, I’m not. But I will be. This is…sudden. When I found out he had a wife, I didn’t expect children. I should have.”
“Hey…” Grey tried to say.
“No. It’s fine, Grey. I’m okay. Actually…” I smiled a wobbly smile. “I’m better than fine now.”
I’d been given a gift that I’d never imagined possible.
Bella.
I walked closer to him and held out my arms. “Can I hold her?”
He smiled sweetly and offered her to me. I leaned in and carefully cradled her head in the crook of my arm, cuddling her close. She was fully asleep now, looking so peaceful, without a care in the world.
The waterworks started again. I laughed. Oh, God, did I laugh. She was perfect, exquisite.
I sat on the couch with her as I cried over her, tears of joy and loss. It was too much and not enough. I was bombarded with so many emotions, but the one that I felt the most was utter elation.
A baby girl!
Just like the one I’d lost at seventeen. I’d always thought she’d look just like Bella, too.
Bella could never take my daughters place – they were two separate beings – but she could help fill the void that I’d felt since losing her.
Grey sat next to me and pulled me to his side. I held Bella to me as I turned to him and bawled. I let out years and years of emotions against his chest as I held my niece to mine. It was the most freeing and exhilarating experience.
I didn’t know this then, but it would be the first of many.
Chapter 8
Grey
A knock on the door tore me from sleep. I didn’t sleep on Sam’s couch like I’d planned; I’d slept on mine. I stood at six feet three inches tall. My couch was nowhere big enough to accommodate my size, therefore it was a restless, uncomfortable night.
Clara refused to be separated from Bella. When I told her I was going to take Bella back to Mom’s, she about had a conniption. Sam, thankfully, anticipated Clara’s reaction and had already brought everything to the B&B. After a brief call, she told me that she stuck close, and then she delivered all of Bella’s things to Clara and me.
I’d setup the playpen in the bedroom and gave Clara the diaper bag. I told her I planned on staying – I wasn’t leaving her alone with Bella just yet – which surprisingly, she didn’t argue. She nodded and shut the bedroom door behind her and Bella.
I could honestly say that I had no fucking clue what happened here last night. Clara went from scared out of her damn mind again, to overcome with joy, and then she was bawling against my chest hysterically. I didn’t think it was something she allowed herself to do often, either.
I was at a loss, and in the morning light, I still was. The confusion I had for this woman just kept building and building.
But…
My attraction and respect kept growing deeper and stronger. She was a puzzle I wanted to piece back together.
I was totally fucked.
Another knock sounded as I stretched, trying to shake off the sleep (or lack thereof).
“Comin’,” I called out quietly, not wanting to be too loud. I cracked the door and found a grey haired man staring at me. He was my height and still in pretty good shape – he probably still went to the gym regularly – but he was wearing a designer suit.
A designer suit in the Blue Ridge Mountains.
Who is this yahoo?
His expression turned furious, and he demanded, “Where’s Clara?”
“Sleepin’, I reckon.” I yawned. “What’s it to ya?”
“Who are you?” he demanded again, pointing his finger at me.
I opened the door more, wearing only my jeans from the night before. I scratched the back of my head and stretched as I stared at the man, yawning again. “Seriously? We’re gonna do this?” My voice was still rough from sleep.
His color flushed a deeper red. “Where’s Clara?!”
“Shhh,” I quietened him. “Who the hell do you think you are, coming to my house, demanding things? There are people sleepin’ here.”
If he didn’t shut up, he’d wake Bella.
He lowered his voice, flustered. “I…I… Where’s Clara?”
I crossed my arms over my chest, giving him a pointed look. “Who are you? I’m not sayin’ a word about anyone ’til I know.”
He huffed, staring at me like I was the idiot. “Galen. I’m Galen Talbert.”
“You’re Galen?”
Heaven was shining down on me today. I had a lot of questions for this man.
“Where’s Clara? Why are you here?”
I nabbed my coat off the rack and donned it on before closing the door behind me. The morning was bright, but there was a nasty bite in the air. “I’m glad you finally graced us with your presence, Mr. Talbert. You and I have a lot to talk about.” I cracked my neck and towered over him.
“Who do you-”
I leaned in and cut him off. “I’m the man that held Clara’s shit together yesterday while you were hundreds of miles away.” I was livid with him. “I’m not the brightest bulb there is, but it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that she’s scared shitless of her brother. There are a lot of holes in Jon and her story. Somethin’ is not right about it, and I know that you know. Now, what in the hell is goin’ on here?”
Someone needed to provide answers, quick.
He squared his shoulders and stood tall, the crazy old goat. “Listen, son, I don’t care what you think you know, but this is none of your concern.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. I’ve been a part of Bella’s life since she was born. If I’m gonna trust the two of you with her wellbein’, I need some fuckin’ answers.”
“You don’
t need jack,” Galen rebutted and came closer, almost chest to chest with me. “You have no rights to Bella’s welfare. Nothing.”
He had me there.
Still.
“You left Clara driftin’ in the wind, Galen. What in the fuck were you thinkin’?” I needed a better tactic. “You should have seen her yesterday. I’ve…” I shook my head. “I’ve never seen anythin’ like that. She was in pain…more pain then I’ve ever witnessed. It was almost tangible, Galen. If you knew that was gonna happen, why didn’t you come with her? Why didn’t you protect her?! Why are you here just now, when she needed you the most yesterday?!”
His body grew taut, and his words were clipped. “I don’t see why I need to answer to you.”
“You don’t,” I stated simply. “But after what I witnessed yesterday, someone needs to give me some info. I’m tryin’ to figure out what to make of this whole thing!”
He deflated a bit, calming down. “It is not my story to tell, Grey. It’s not. If Clara wanted you to know, she would have told you. I will say that the man Jon made himself out to be is far from the one he was.”
Like I haven’t already figured that out!
Instead of stating that, I asked, “And that was?”
He ignored my question. “I sent Clara alone because I thought she needed to face this alone. She’s been… How do I put this?” He deliberated, choosing his words carefully. “She hasn’t lived a real life for a long time. She’s sweet. She’s beautiful. She’s the most kindhearted, amazing person I’ve ever encountered. But she’s wounded, Grey. Almost mortally. She won’t step out of her comfort zone now because of it.”
He was feeling whatever was happening completely, wholeheartedly.
“She’s in a rut. A bad one, one I’ve been trying to get her out of. I’ve been pushing her to experience more, but she won’t. She keeps saying that she’s happy, when I know that she’s merely existing. I thought this was an answer to making her feel.”
“To feel?” I laughed in his face. “You’re talkin’ like she’s a robot. That woman is the most emotional creature I’ve ever met. She’s not unfeelin’.”
He jabbed his finger into my chest. “You don’t get it. You never would unless you’ve seen it for yourself. I’ve heard more emotion from her since she’s been here than I have since she was a teenager. I thought this would be good for her.”
Finding Bliss (Bliss #1) Page 8
