by Eden Davis
“So what was so important? Is this about the list? It hasn’t even been six weeks. Don’t tell me you’re ready to make your report?” Lena asked once lunch had been ordered.
“Shouldn’t we wait for Jasi?” Aleesa asked.
“Uh, she’s not coming.” Livia took a quick sip of her lemon water to avoid having to elaborate on why Jas had not been invited.
“Okay, so what’s up?” Lena asked, pushing the meeting along.
Livia unfolded her list and handed it over to Aleesa, who shared it with Lena. “And as you can see I’ve already made good on my promise to do two.”
“Details,” Aleesa insisted.
“Lees is right. We need the down and dirty. How do we know you didn’t simply cross this stuff off to shut us up?”
“Yeah, like this ‘to be determined act of outrageous sex.’ What the hell is that all about?” Aleesa probed.
“I got busy with myself in the hallway of one of my client’s homes while this guy was in the other room watching porn and jerking off. There, outrageous enough for you?” Livia asked, smiling broadly at the memory.
“Ah, hell’s bells! Livia’s a freak and she likes it!” Lena chuckled. “Did he see you?”
“Hell no! I would have died.”
“When?” her cousin asked.
“The day of my party.”
“No wonder you were willing to pinky swear so readily,” Aleesa said. “You gave in way too easily. I should have known you had something up your sleeve.”
“So what about the other stuff? How’d that happen?”
“Well, that was all Jasi’s doing. We started at Tickle Me Pink. Hey, did you know there is a diamond encrusted vibrator that costs over three thousand dollars?”
“I have one,” Lena revealed while the other two looked at her in disbelief. “What? It was a gift.”
Livia went on to tell them all of the events in which Jasi had conspired against her. From the toy store, to walking the streets of New York with a vibrator down her pants to her sexy high jinx in Jessebelle’s, she gave them all of the sorted details, watering them down to quiet the embarrassment that was tiptoeing through her.
“Oh you’ve been a busy little slut,” Lena teased. “Toys and strange boys! Go on, girl. I’m proud of you, though you still haven’t actually done the nasty.”
“Yeah, well, Jasi already tried to amend the pinky swear to include intercourse, but it’s too late.”
“Well, now that you’ve tiptoed outside the box a little, how do you feel about yourself?” Aleesa queried.
“For the most part, good,” Livia admitted. “It was kinda hot and sexy being spontaneous like that, even if I didn’t do the deed. Him calling me a bitch when we were about to do it turned me off. He didn’t even know me. Why would he call me something like that?”
“Sounds like it was heat of the moment lust talking. Kids these days use the term bitch like we use baby,” Aleesa schooled her.
“Well, he tried that too and I found both offensive. I’m too old school for all of this, but I am glad that I have the memories to take into the next decade.”
“Omigod, have you already gone back to being the boring old cake lady?” Lena accused.
“I did what I promised to do.”
“And admitted feeling good doing it. So why not go through with the whole thing? Most of these things don’t involve sex anyway,” Aleesa pointed out.
“That’s what Jasi said. So, really, what’s the point?” Livia argued. “As you’ve all noticed, half of my fuck-it list doesn’t even involve fucking! I’m obviously not very adventurous.”
“Don’t look at it that way. Look at them as places to start,” Lena offered. “Who knows where they’ll lead you.”
“Now on my list, I’d definitely have to include a threesome with two guys. I love the idea of it being all about me. Double the pleasure, double my fun,” Aleesa revealed. “Walt can watch if he wants, but that’s all.”
“Oh, so now you’re ready to take Walter up on his offer?” Livia remarked, referring to Aleesa’s husband’s misguided anniversary gift of no-questions-asked sex with a stranger.
“My man watching someone else get me off does add a lot of heat to the situation,” Lena agreed, remembering her time with Jason in the Champagne Room. “The idea of a stranger watching me have sex is pretty hot, too.”
“Okay, top three fantasies?” Aleesa dared Lena, not even bothering to look at Livia.
“Fantasy or for an actual fuck-it list?” Lena asked for clarification.
“Either. Both.”
“That’s tough. My go-to are, number three, an orgy. Do you ever think about what that would be like? All those sweaty bodies rolling around fucking their brains out?” Lena asked. “Hot, but would it actually go on my fuck-it list or remain a fantasy? Don’t know. Number two, a little exhibitionism. I read about this erotic art show where guests get to finger paint naked models before getting their brushes dipped, if you know what I mean. Sometimes if I need a little push over the edge, I think about that. But my number one fantasy—don’t laugh—is getting spanked by my old English Lit professor. I discovered that my good girl likes to be punished for being bad. Now, that’s one fantasy I’ve incorporated into my actual love life—without the costume. The whole plaid skirt and knee-highs look is too over the top for me.”
Livia sat listening, feeling both intimidated and embarrassed by her weak ass fuck-it list. A sexy tattoo? Buying toys and playing with them? Compared to these two, most of her fantasies could be part of a Disney double feature.
“Your top three?” Lena asked Aleesa.
“Well, my number one is definitely the threesome. But that’s only for the head, because Walter would never agree to that.”
“Unless it was two women and you!” Lena laughed.
“True that! Number two is me dominating him and using a strap-on. Again, head games only. And number one, without a doubt, is being with another woman.”
The visual of Jasi licking that girl’s pussy popped up in Livia’s head. And just like it had when she’d watched Nilla and Coco go at it, her vajayjay clutched. What was going on with her? Why all of this fascination with girl-on-girl action?
“So you fantasize about…you know…doing it with a woman?” Livia queried.
“All the time,” Aleesa admitted. “When I was writing the freak book for Walt, I had so many fantasies about me with women. I discovered that I definitely have a bi-curious mind, but a strictly dickly pussy.”
“I won’t lie, that stripper was sexy as hell. When she was sitting on my lap and grinding on me, I was so turned on I kissed her! I’m getting hot right now just thinking about it! But ultimately, all I wanted was to get to Jason. That said, it’s still a go to vision when I’m alone and trying to get off.”
“So fantasizing about it doesn’t mean you might…you know…be…” Livia attempted to ask.
“Gay? Girl, you have got to get your head out those Betty Crocker books and into some other seriously hot reference materials,” Aleesa replied.
“Having sex with another woman is like one of the top four fantasies for straight women. It doesn’t make you gay or mean you want to do it for real,” Lena added.
“Then why do we get turned on seeing two women together?”
“Because from advertisements in the magazines to those Girls Gone Wild videos, the sexy images of two women together now seems like forbidden but natural fruit,” Aleesa explained.
“What do you think Jasi would say about it?” Livia asked, fishing to see if they had any idea about their friend.
“It probably turns her on, too, and that girl is all about the penis,” Aleesa replied. “I think that’s why she’s never been married. Too many dicks, too little time.”
“What about Todd?”
“An open, commuter relationship? He’s perfect for her,” Lena chimed in. “You know Jasi. Variety is definitely the spiciest part of life.”
Livia took a bite of her sa
lad and pondered this dilemma as she chewed. It was crystal clear that the two of them had no idea about the double life Jasi was leading. Livia had to wonder if Aleesa and Lena would be as angry as she was by Jasi’s deception. They were a pretty liberal, you-do-you, group of friends, and unlike herself, Liv was pretty certain that they could not care less whether Jasi was bisexual or a lesbian. And truly, aside from her own confusion about the morality of alternative lifestyles, it wasn’t the idea of Jas possibly being gay that upset her most. It was that she didn’t respect their friendship or trust them enough to be honest. It seemed a sad commentary on their relationship that Jasi felt the need to deceive her friends. She’d been fronting all these years, and now Livia had no idea who Jasi Westfield really was.
“So, Livia, back to you and your list. Did we give you any ideas?” her cousin queried.
“I don’t know. While I was doing the stuff it did feel kind of fun and liberating, but once I got home and really thought about it, it’s just not me. I bake cakes and have sex in committed relationships with men who call me beautiful, not bitch. I’m almost fifty. I can’t get rid of the church girl just like that,” Livia said, snapping her fingers for emphasis. “And…I’d be mortified if anyone found out what I did. I was embarrassed telling you two.”
“Then keep it to yourself, but don’t stop growing and discovering yourself,” Aleesa said, sounding more like a life coach than a cousin.
“Lena, look what happened to you. You ended up on the Internet, well sort of. Even though that video of the girl in the strip club wasn’t you, people thought it was, and you were humiliated. Look how long it took you to set things straight with your family and the public.”
“That was probably the most humiliating thing that ever happened to me. I felt like I’d totally disgraced myself and my family. I thought the scandal was going to kill my father. But that crazy relationship with Jason was the best thing that ever happened to me. Can I tell you, making all those bets and paying them off with amazing sex has not only made me a better lover and woman, but a better business woman. Seriously. Those months of having sex on my own terms were so damn liberating. It gave me confidence to face anything and anyone, and be a fine ass sexy woman doing it.”
“Long live Pocahontas!” Aleesa cheered.
“Exactly. That’s what you should do, Livia. When I was Pocahontas and Jason was Mr. Big Johnson, it was like hiding in plain sight. I felt like somebody else was doing all of those sexual things that I wanted to do, but couldn’t bring myself to actually do.”
“Well, I already have Quincy.”
“Girl, you are way freakier than you admit.” Aleesa laughed.
“Who is Quincy?”
Livia lifted both hands and pointed down to her crotch, sending the other two women into a hysterical laughing fit. As Lena and Aleesa exchanged a fist bump, Livia went on to tell them how their teasing at the party had caused her to rename her vagina, losing Grandma Ethel and replacing her with hot and spontaneous Quincy.
“Great! Now make her real,” Lena told her. “Give Quincy a personality and life and put her in charge of getting your fuck-it list done. Every time a chance to cross off an item on your list comes up, let Quincy take the lead. That’s what I did. How else do you think I’d ever wind up in a titty bar with a stripper on my lap?”
“I did that when I was out with Jasi. I kinda let Quincy take over.”
“See, and look what happened! You nearly banged the hottie behind the bar.”
“Yeah, but if one of my clients had seen me? Or Adin and Ashri?” Livia asked, speaking of Aleesa’s boys and her godsons. “My reputation and business would be ruined.”
“Then what you need to do is take your fuck-it list on the road where you don’t know anybody and nobody knows you,” Lena advised. “There is no way your uptight behind is going to do anything at home.”
“There’s an idea. We can make that the theme of this year’s trip,” Aleesa suggested, referring to their annual girlfriend getaway.
“No. Unh, uh. She needs to do this on her own,” Lena argued.
“You’re right.” Aleesa retracted her initial opinion to concur. “She doesn’t need any voices, other than Quincy’s, whispering in her ear and confusing her.
“You’re awfully quiet. What do you think about a little pleasure trip?”
Livia was surprised not only to find herself warming up to Lena’s suggestion, but feeling grateful to her for providing her this solution. The idea of being away from the known so she could anonymously delve into the unknown intrigued her. And while she wasn’t sure how much she’d actually accomplish, she wanted to try. Thanks to a perfect storm of age, desire, and a dare, what had started as a joke was turning into a quest.
“I’ll think about it,” was all she would commit to.
“And don’t go asking Jasi,” Lena told her. “You know that little ho will have her condoms packed and be on the first thing smokin’.”
“You got that right. And then after she climbs off the dick between her legs, she’ll catch the next plane to meet you!” Aleesa said, making all three of them laugh.
Don’t be so sure it’s a dick, Livia wanted to tell them.
“I know exactly where you should go,” Lena announced with all the excitement of an Idris Elba sighting. “If you want to go skinny dipping and incorporate any other upgrades on this sheet, go to Saline Beach in St. Bart’s. Best nudie cutie beaches in the Caribbean. Stay at the Christopher Hotel. Great rooms, great service, great time!”
“Nudie cutie? Really?” Livia asked, rolling her eyes.
“Honestly, though, do you think she can handle being by herself? You know, alone in active pursuit mode? We are talking about Livia Charles,” Aleesa asked, ignoring Livia and speaking to Lena as if her cousin wasn’t sitting at the table.
“True. It is a bit like sending the Little Red Hen into Colonel Sanders’ kitchen. There’s a good chance she’s gonna get devoured.”
“Hello. I am sitting right here,” Livia protested. “What are you two so worried about? It’s not like I’m fresh out of high school and headed abroad on my own.”
“Yeah, well, here’s the thing, Livi, Aleesa’s got a point. If you play in the big girl leagues, you’ve to be ready to handle the attention that comes with putting yourself out there like that,” Lena explained.
“What she’s trying to say, Cuz, is that you’re beautiful and the more you bloom, the more men are going to want to sniff your bud. Especially down there in the islands where the universal rule of ‘what happens on vacation, stays on vacation’ applies.”
Livia could feel a mix of confusion and concern color her face. Her desire was definitely piqued, but maybe this whole going away alone to get her groove on wasn’t such a good idea after all.
“So are you now saying that you don’t think it’s a good idea for me to go?” Liv asked, her head shifting from side to side so she could gauge both their reactions.
“No, not at all. What we’re saying is that you need to be prepared for the attention,” Aleesa replied. “And have a few guidelines to follow.”
“Like what?”
“Like always listen to your gut. Don’t go with anyone or do anything that doesn’t feel one hundred percent right,” Lena said.
“And always let someone know when and where you are.”
“Take your own supply of condoms. No cover. No lover,” Lena told her. “And have an exit line,” she added.
“An exit line? Okay, now what’s that?” Livia asked as her head ping-ponged back and forth between the two.
“You know, a line to let someone down easy, so they walk away feeling good and not pissed at you.”
“We’re scaring her to death,” Aleesa remarked. “Look at her face. She’s not going to go alone.”
“No, you haven’t,” Livia said, surprising them both. “True, I might be a little nervous, but I really want to try this. Besides, you’re forgetting one important detail. Quincy’s got this. I’m
merely going along for the ride.”
Mama Don’t Preach
Jasi kissed Belinda on her forehead before pulling back the covers and putting her feet on the floor. She turned to gaze down at her still sleeping lover. The beauty in her bed made her smile, both with happiness and disbelief. Jasi couldn’t remember the last time she’d spent two, let alone seven nights in a row with one lover—man or woman. But ever since their tryst at the bar, keeping Belinda Rodriquez off her mind, and out of her arms, had been a mission impossible. If Jasi didn’t know better, she’d swear she was falling in love.
There was nothing more she’d rather do than stay in bed all day and find out, but it was Sunday and that meant getting her ass up and dressed so she could get over to Staten Island before eleven. Belinda stirred and turned over, exposing her beautiful naked ass. Jasi felt her pussy start to cream again and it took everything she had not to jump back in the sack and gently fuck her awake, but being late for Sunday brunch at her parents’ was not an option. Not even if it meant walking away from the juiciest apple ass this side of the Hudson.
Her mind was a muddle of thoughts as she undressed and stepped into the shower. The fact had not escaped her that finding this new love had cost her an old one. True, they were not equal in nature—one was gift wrapped in romance, sex and intimacy, while the other was cloaked pleasingly in friendship. Different yes, but both involved a dedicated, heartfelt love. She and Livia had not spoken since that fateful incident at Jessebelle’s, but it certainly was not for her lack of trying. Jas had called, emailed, texted and even ambushed her at the bakery so they could talk this out. Other than the three or four sentences she’d managed to blurt out, Livi had refused to talk to her, but the disapproval on her face had said it all. Confusion and silence had solidified into anger and taken the fate of their friendship hostage. Jasi had no idea what to think. And until the two of them could sit down and talk, she would remain clueless.
