“War distorts things.” She couldn’t deny that she wanted to reach out and touch Luke. He had beautiful, rugged hands. It was those hands that had saved the life of a little boy this morning. Healing hands. What would it be like to have those calloused hands moving across her skin? Exploring her? A shiver of yearning coursed through her. Their situation was impossible. But it didn’t stop her from wanting to kiss him.
“No question,” Luke murmured. “When you’re in a dangerous, threatening environment like Iraq or Afghanistan, you suddenly realize you can die at any moment. And then life becomes very precious and intense.”
“Is that what is happening to us?” Megan tilted her head and looked deep into his eyes. “Is that why you asked me to leave with you earlier?”
Grimacing, Luke said, “I don’t really know. I like you, Megan. A lot more than I should, I guess. When I see you smile, I feel an incredible happiness here.” He touched his chest. “When I’m away from you, I’m worrying about you. That village is not safe. The enemy can come and go as they please. I worry they’ll see you and either kill or kidnap you.”
“And so we’re drawn to each other. My concern is why. Is it the danger of dying? Or is there something more underneath substantial to this situation? Something to build on?” she asked.
“All good questions,” Luke agreed, giving her the hint of a smile. “They should be asked and honestly answered. I wasn’t looking for someone, Megan. I’m still getting over losing Hope. I never want to put another woman in my ex’s place. It wasn’t fair to Hope and I idealistically thought that our love for each other was enough to see us through the tough times.” His mouth turned downward, his voice suddenly a rasp. “It wasn’t.”
“I never thought for a moment after I met you, Luke, that you were chasing me. I know the difference.” Megan saw him lift his chin and intently study her. “I didn’t come into this company looking for a relationship. My focus was on being a good role model for General Stevenson’s initiative. I don’t want to fail her. I didn’t want to be drawn to you, but I was. And now I fight myself every time I’m around you.” Giving Luke a rueful look, Megan said, “I see you do kind things for people every day. You care for others, and as a field medic, you’re selfless. You’ll put yourself between a bullet and a wounded Marine without ever thinking twice about it, Luke. You’re a hero in my eyes.”
Her words struck him deeply. Luke dragged in a breath. “I didn’t know if what I felt for you was mutual. Thanks for letting me know.”
“It is mutual, but there’s nothing we can do about it. I’m not willing to jeopardize my career, Luke. I can’t.”
“I agree with you completely,” he said. Smiling sadly, Luke added, “That doesn’t mean I don’t care for you, want you or want to spend time with you, Megan.”
“I feel the same.”
“Can we be depressed together?”
She grinned and laughed. “Never lose your sense of humor.”
Warmth penetrated Luke’s heart as he absorbed her smile. “My mother always said I was a jokester.”
“She’s right.” Megan felt some of the heaviness melt away from her heart. “But I love your jokes. You don’t do anything to embarrass anyone, you’re just funny. You make people laugh in a very dark situation.”
“Black humor.”
“Oh, I can do black humor with the best of them,” Megan said with feeling. “When things get crazy in the E.R. and we’re avalanched with injuries coming in, it saves all of us.”
“We all feel that way,” Luke admitted. Brightening a little, he said, “Do you feel better? I see some color back in your cheeks.”
“Amazingly, yes. Thank you.” Megan’s voice lowered with feeling. “Maybe it’s you, Luke. You’re good medicine for me.”
“Hey,” he said ruefully, “whether we like it or not, we’re into each other, Megan. It’s not a bad thing. Just bad timing.”
“I’ll second that.” Seeing merriment come to his green-and-gold eyes, she said, “But there’s nothing that says I can’t appreciate you from a distance or enjoy your company.”
He rubbed his hands together and grinned. “Good, because I’m not going to stop liking you, Megan. Maybe we can hang out on-base. Captain Hall wants me to get some things for his men. Plus, I’m going to raid the hospital supply department for Lar Sholtan. We need some things for the villagers and we might as well make the most out of being here.”
Happiness flowed through Megan. As badly as she wanted to kiss his smiling mouth, she resisted. It was pure torture since she had a feeling he’d be a great lover. “Yes, I’d love to trail around with you. I’ve never seen a scrounger in action.” She met his smile.
“Prepare to be amazed!”
* * *
The next morning, Megan flew out of Bagram with Luke. On board the CH-47 transport were two pallets of scrounged supplies covered with netting. The loadmasters had tightened them down to the deck so nothing could fly around within the helicopter. Luke seemed to know everyone at Bagram. He’d gotten an impressive amount of food, clothing, drugs and vitamins for the village. And everyone she’d met during his day-long scrounging mission had liked the field medic. There was nothing to dislike about Luke, in fact. As they sat together on the nylon-webbing seats in the noisy CH-47, Megan simply absorbed being near him.
When they landed just outside the compound, a group of Marines were on hand to help the loadmasters remove the boxes from the CH-47 as soon as possible. Megan rushed into the compound, directing the Marines carrying the medical supplies to the dispensary building near HQ. It was nearly noon before she and Luke had parceled out and arranged all the supplies, medical or not. And best of all, Luke had boxes of frozen pepperoni pizzas sent to the Navy chow hall chief. There wasn’t a Marine who wasn’t looking forward to pizza tonight, all thanks to Luke.
Shortly after noon chow, Megan caught up with Buck, who was over at the C.P. “Buck, are you going into the village sometime today?”
“Sure. In about an hour. Why? You want to come along?”
“I would,” Megan said. “I got an update on the two children at the hospital before we left this morning and I want to go tell the parents how they’re doing.”
Buck nodded. “That’s mighty fine of you to do that, Doc.”
The grizzled Marine’s praise pleased her. Most sergeants, the ball bearings of any company to keep it running in the right direction, were usually all-business. The thoughtful look in Buck’s eyes, however, told Megan differently. “I try to put myself in their place. Their children are hundreds of miles away and there’s no phone to talk to them. I’d like the same consideration if I were in their shoes, wouldn’t you?”
“Yes, I would,” Buck said, giving her a slight smile. “So, any supplies you want to bring over there with us for your clinic?”
Megan handed him a list of the boxes and numbers so they knew which ones to load into the Humvee. “I do. Thanks. What time?”
“1400.”
“I’ll be there. Thanks, Buck.” Turning, she hurried out of HQ.
Buck seemed to notice Captain Hall listening to their conversation. The C.P. was empty except for the two of them. The radio chatter was constant. He walked over to his desk and sat down.
“She’s turning into a real asset,” Hall said.
“Yes, sir, she is. Pretty, smart and savvy. And she’s a damn good medic, too. She’s as good as Luke is.”
Hall’s brows fell and he stopped working on a report. “I worry for her, Buck. I don’t think she realizes the dangers of working in the village.”
“No safe places, sir, that’s true. But I saw her in action out there yesterday morning when those two tykes got legs blown off by that damned IED. She’s all-business. And frankly, my men are seeing a difference in the men in the village since she’s been here.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, it’s like the wives of the village have surrounded Doc Trayhern and they like her. I believe Mina Khan is leading the charge on this one. They want Megan there. She’s doin’ good work with the women and tykes. She’s improving their lives by the day, and they’re grateful.”
“Good to know, but do you think Timor Khan is going to stop the next Taliban or al-Qaeda operatives from waltzing through his village?”
“No, sir, I don’t. But I think Khan just might be more firm with them and tell them to leave us alone.”
Snorting, Hall said, “That would be damned nice. A pipe dream, Sergeant.”
“Yes, sir, probably is. But—” he picked up a paper “—you never know. I’ve been over here on four tours now. And I think I know the Pashtuns a little better than you, sir. If you show consistent loyalty to them, they’ll return it in kind.”
“Oh, Lokhay,” Hall muttered, not disguising the frustration in his voice.
“Pashtuns are people with hearts and feelings, sir. While they haven’t bestowed Lokhay on our company, my gut tells me that Mina Khan is close to giving it to Doc Trayhern.”
“Well, that’d be a first,” Hall said, scribbling his signature on a report. “Because if they ever bestowed Lokhay on her, it means the whole village would not only protect her, but go to war against the enemy to keep her safe.” He shook his head. “I’ve never seen that happen.”
“I think that’s what General Stevenson is after,” Buck said, thoughtful about the idea of placing well-trained American military women in the villages. “And right now my men see a positive difference in the way the male villagers are treating us. It’s a start.”
“Yes, that’s all it is.” Hall scowled and looked toward the open door, letting air into the squalid structure. “We know Gholam is the local Taliban leader. And thanks to Trayhern, we know where he lives. She’s gotten us useful intel.”
“Oh,” Buck said softly, “I think over time, having a woman like Doc Trayhern here is going to switch things up a lot. For the better.”
* * *
Megan finished telling the mother of the two children the good news. The mother wept with relief. Her husband, one of the farmers, was not home, but Mina was at her side, smiling through her tears. The small mud home smelled like goat dung, and the family was barely eking out an existence. The dirt floor was hard packed and one very thin, old Persian rug lay at one end.
“There’s even better news,” Megan told the mother, releasing her embrace. “Luke, the other medic, has already set up an appointment with an NGO that is going to supply your children with prosthetics. They’re going to have a leg to walk around on.”
Mina clapped her hands. “Allah be praised! Please thank Luke for his help. In the past, when one of our children or one of our husbands was wounded by an IED, no one did anything. Oh, the medic would come and they would save their lives, but you see how many of our people hobble around on wooden crutches.”
“I saw that. And when Luke and I got a chance to go to Bagram, it was a high priority to get the NGOs involved to help your village.” Megan sat down on the Persian rug as the tearful mother offered them tea. Mina sat down next to her.
“And what does that mean for all of us?” Mina asked.
“It means that the NGO will be sending out a team to fit and measure the rest of your villagers who have lost legs over the years. They’re going to pay for the prosthetics. Everyone will have legs to walk around on.”
Mina sighed and wiped more tears from her eyes. “This is almost too much good news...too much.” She gave Megan a warm look of gratitude. “I wish they’d had a woman in every Marine company that has been out here. Since you’ve come, so many things have changed for the better.” Gripping Megan’s hand, she whispered in an unsteady voice, “Thank you, dear friend. Thank you....”
* * *
By the time Megan arrived back at the compound with Buck in the lead Humvee, it was chow time. Dusk was setting in, the sky pink along the horizon of the mighty Hindu Kush Mountains. It looked so beautiful and serene, yet Megan knew as she climbed out of the vehicle that the mountains were alive with roving bands of the enemy. And they lived to kill infidels, whether American or European. It was a sobering reality. She sniffed the air.
“Pizza!” she called out, grinning over at Buck.
“It shore is! I’ve been dreamin’ of it all day long. Let’s saddle up and get to the chow hall or there won’t be any left for us.”
As she entered the busy chow hall, Megan spotted Luke at their usual corner table. She waved to him and he waved back. Getting in line in back of Buck, Megan saw the power pizza had on the company. The Marines were devouring it like a starving wolf pack. The laughter and noise were higher tonight, much more so than on other nights. She moved through the line, and the cook put half a pizza on her tray. She thanked him and threaded her way through the packed confines to find a seat opposite Luke.
“Happy group,” she noted, sitting down and smiling over at him. “You’re the most popular guy in the company right now.” She spread the paper napkin across her utilities and picked up a steaming wedge of pizza.
“Hey, that’s what scroungers are. We make life better out here on the frontier,” he said as he chortled. How beautiful Megan looked. Her face was soft and open. He liked the soft sprinkling of pale freckles across her nose and cheeks. Her red hair was once more in a ponytail, and nothing could hide the joy in her sparkling blue eyes.
“In my heart, you’re my hero, Luke. The looks on these guys’ faces is priceless. Everyone is homesick and you were able to give them a gift, a memory of better times.” The words I love you nearly tore out of her mouth. It would have been an unfortunate slip. Shocked, Megan gulped. Where on earth had that come from? Shaken by her own impulses, she dodged Luke’s warm gaze and forced herself to concentrate on eating her pizza. Her heart tumbled with anxiety and hope. For now, she had to keep this burgeoning secret to herself.
“You okay?” Luke asked, wiping his hands off on the napkin. “The pizza taste okay?” Or maybe she was still upset over the injured children?
“Er...yes, the pizza’s fine.”
“You’re surprised about something?”
Flicking a glance across the table at him, she saw he was truly concerned. Panic ate at her. After their talk at Bagram, she couldn’t let Luke know her growing feelings for him. “It’s nothing,” she managed. “I’m okay.”
Luke looked around the noisy chow hall and grinned. “I think everyone’s okay tonight. A momentary respite from war.”
“Pizza is powerful,” she managed in a joking tone. And then she met his merry gaze. “Have you told them you brought chocolate, vanilla and strawberry ice cream for them, too?”
“No way!” He grinned mischievously and leaned forward. “Listen, if these grunts knew there were fifty gallons of ice cream, they’d have torn the lock off the freezer and eaten it in a heartbeat. Fortunately, the chief put a guard on the refer—just in case.” He chuckled.
Megan laughed. “Surely, someone knows about it.”
“Yeah, Chief Gustafson, the head cook, knows. When we were unloading the stuff out of the helo, I pulled him aside. I told him there were three cardboard boxes that I’d written fish sticks on so that he’d know there was ice cream in them.”
“You’re a real fox, Collier.”
“A scrounger’s middle name,” he agreed, and drowned in her husky laughter. The ache to touch Megan’s smooth cheek, to follow the curve of her jaw and trail his fingers down her slender neck, ate at him. Luke sat back and wiped his mouth with the napkin. “It always pays to be a fox.”
Joy filtered through Megan as she ate her pizza. Never had she heard so much laughter in the chow hall. Her heart warmed because all these men had loved ones at home. They missed them as much as she missed her o
wn family. This wasn’t a place where pizza could be found. Giving Luke a tender look, she said, “You’re one of a kind, Luke, and I’m really glad you’re here with me.”
Luke nodded and didn’t say much. Marines sat on either side of them. Her praise was enough under the circumstances. “Hey, let’s take the gummy bear vitamin boxes over to your clinic tomorrow morning. The kids are gonna love ’em.”
“I’ve already got the boxes stacked over at Mina’s house. Buck helped me bring all the supplies into my clinic today.”
“Those kids...I wish I could see their faces tomorrow morning when you start handing out bottles of gummy bear vitamins. Those kids will want those vitamins every day, without fail.”
“No joke. I’m going to have to tell the mothers to hide the bottles somewhere or they’ll want to eat them all in a day’s time. Every kid loves candy and sweets.”
Chuckling, Luke agreed. “I’ll be holding a clinic in the other part of the village tomorrow for the fathers and sons.” Children age six and under were always taken by the mothers to Megan. Children who were seven and up were split up. The sons went with fathers to start learning how to till the soil, grow food and find wood for the fire. The girls stayed at their mothers’ sides, wearing a head scarf for the first time in their lives. They would learn the intricacies of home and hearth.
“I’m sure my clinic will be the talk of the village by nightfall,” Megan said.
“You’ll be the go-to gal for gummy bears, no doubt. You’ll be an overnight sensation.”
Grinning, she said, “And if it wasn’t for you haranguing that chief at the hospital supply depot, we wouldn’t even have gummy bear vitamins to hand out.” Her heart opened as Luke looked suddenly shy. Megan began to realize he didn’t see what he did as special. But it was. Scroungers worked behind the scenes and without orders for the things they wanted to get. It was a military black market, for sure, but every company had such an entrepreneurial individual. Luke had given the story of the children of Lar Sholtan to the fifty-year-old medical Navy chief and he’d softened the man’s heart. In the end, Luke was given enough boxes of gummy bears to keep every child in this village in vitamins for a year. And Megan knew those vitamins would make a difference.
Beyond Valor Page 11
