Hindsight

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Hindsight Page 36

by Jody Klaire


  “You’re a hard woman to live up to.” Abby smiled, tears filling her eyes.

  “He doesn’t have to live up to me, Abby. He’s a good man who adores you.” Renee did know that much. She’d checked him out. His father, she had her reservations about and it wasn’t lost on her who he was. “I’m just some dumb agent you knew way back when. He’s your husband, he’s why you have your children, he’s home.”

  Abby sighed. “You sound a lot more forgiving than me.”

  “I’ve had a lot of incredible people who have forgiven me first. It makes it easier.” And it did. In fact, it seemed to release a huge weight off her shoulders.

  “If you’re having a relationship with her, that will see you disciplined at the very least.” Abby’s tone was soft but the worry seeped through. “You don’t hide it well enough.”

  Renee cocked her head. “With who?”

  “Who else have you always gone running after?” Abby shook her head. “The whole pretense of you dragging that kid across half the country to get her aunt some kittens?” She snorted. “Seriously? Why else would you go to all that trouble to spend your vacation with someone you’ve been in the pocket of for years?”

  Renee clamped her mouth shut. Abby was the second person who’d thought Frei and her were in love with each other. What was with that?

  “I’m not having a relationship with Ursula.” She held in her smile. “But thank you, even if you just accused her of abusing her position.”

  Abby scowled. “I know that all this,” she motioned to the boathouse, “was no training exercise, no vacation, and for someone supposed to be half-drunk, you smell of nothing but the foul muck in that river.”

  Renee sniffed at herself. It was a bit pungent. “Maybe we just have a different way of enjoying ourselves?”

  Abby’s mood glinted through her eyes. “So that’s all I get. You promised to marry me and I don’t even get a reason.” She got to her feet, brushing herself off. “You flew a plane even with the sight problems you have, cover your tracks, rob a drug store, get involved in an incident in some warehouse.” She flicked a piece of dirt off her shoulder. “Not to mention that judge . . . for what, Renee?”

  “I’m perfectly fine to fly, like I said, I’m fit again. I have no idea what you’re talking about otherwise. We drove to Cincinnati and flew over to get Aunt Bess some kittens.” She shrugged. “Ursula was around, so we thought we’d surprise her.”

  “By drowning her?” Abby didn’t believe a word of it, no matter what Renee said, no matter how she put it, Abby didn’t want to believe it.

  “Ursula is Ursula. That meant when we surprised her, she decided to punish us by running through exercises.” Renee shrugged. “You know how competitive we get.”

  “No, I don’t. I know you don’t even like getting muddy.” Fleming flicked her gaze over her with a look of utter disgust. “The Renee I knew wouldn’t be seen in such a state, let alone drinking beer in a boathouse.”

  Renee stared up at her. “The Renee you knew never came home.”

  “So I see.” Abby picked up her handbag and stormed past.

  Renee didn’t bother to look back. She ran her gaze over her clothes. Soggy, muddy, stinking, her short nails black from some kind of tar-like substance, her hair thick with goodness knows what. Her jeans were ripped, her shirt was skewed. She had grazes over her arms, a chin that felt like a football and somewhere back in the boathouse was her assault rifle.

  No, she wasn’t the woman Abby had known. She was the real Renee. She grinned. It felt good.

  Chapter 79

  GRIMES TOOK A raging Fleming, my mother, and Aunt Bess in his car. Frei had given them directions to meet back at her place when she’d got her car running.

  I got the feeling Renee needed some alone time so I’d wandered over to Frei who was swearing in a few different languages at her battered car. “The wonder of teenagers, huh?”

  Frei’s icy blues fixed me with one of her scariest stares. “She drove through the hedgerow, Lorelei, through it.”

  “She ain’t ever driven before. At least it ain’t that dented.” Much. It looked like it had been driven through a wall, not to mention the gouges out of the paint. The windshield was in one piece though.

  “I’m not mad at the damage, Lorelei, I’m mad she had to be in that position.” Frei had a wrench in hand and was fiddling with something. I didn’t know enough about cars to know what.

  “But she’s okay now. She’ll get yelled at by Miroslav and the others, sure, but she has you now.” I shoved my hands in my pockets and winced, then pulled out something that resembled a squished reed from it.

  “Not the point.”

  I sighed. “Can you fix it?”

  “It’s a car. It’s not rocket science.” Her tone was curt and cold as always.

  “You mad at me too?” It sure felt like it. What’d I do?

  “You ever throw yourself in front of me again and I’ll shoot you myself.”

  I smiled. “Feeling better, huh?”

  She put her hands on her hips, wrench glinting like a gun, jacket back like wings. “You took a bullet for me, Lorelei.”

  I nodded. “Yup. Suck it up.”

  She scowled and wagged her wrench at me like she’d hurl it at me any second. “It was a stupid, foolish, idiotic thing to do.” Her eyes twinkled and a warm smile eased the frown from her face. “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.” I held her gaze. “I really don’t like Jäger.”

  “Get in line.” She turned back to the car, shield slamming back up.

  “How do we stop him?” I asked. “He could hurt other people.”

  Frei yanked at whatever she was tightening.

  “I still have your back, if you need me.” I braced for her to yell at me but she stopped and stared.

  “If you ask for my mother’s help, I get my genes from her too, you know.” I smiled. “Is there a way we can stop him?”

  “I can’t expect you to follow me.” She stared at the ground. “This is my personal baggage.”

  “Yeah, like mine was back in Oppidum and Renee’s was Yannick and you were with us every step of the way.” I frowned. “You think we wouldn’t back you up?”

  Her chin wobbled. “Thank you.”

  “When you come up with a plan, you let us know.” I sighed as I stared at Renee still sitting alone. “That’s if Fleming doesn’t fire us all first.”

  Frei looked up to the sky, muttered something in German and went back to her car. “Renee is better with this than I am.” It sounded as if it was painful for her to admit.

  “So ask her.”

  Frei glared at me.

  “Or I’ll ask her.” I swallowed. Nice to know Frei had the warm fuzzies. “You’re a pain in my butt, Frankenfrei.”

  Frei’s glare creased into laughter. “Move or I will throw it at you.”

  I sighed and trudged away from her. You go rescue a woman, get half-drowned, and I was still a gofer. I shook my head. Some things never changed.

  Chapter 80

  FREI CLATTERED AWAY behind me as I hesitated halfway between her and Renee. I wasn’t sure what I could say to Renee that would help so I stared up at the stars instead. I smiled as the tune of Moonlight Sonata once again filled my head.

  When Fleming had stomped off, her aura was dimmed to the point I couldn’t read it but her glare at me told me that Renee would have to work hard not for her to make things difficult.

  At least more difficult.

  “Shorty, what you doin’ catching flies?”

  I smiled. “You’re real overworked, you know that?”

  “Ah, your grandpa is taking a nap with Tiddles. I got to keep busy.”

  It was a nice picture to hold onto. It sounded happy and comfortable. Home.

  “An’ you’re still collecting dust . . .”

  “What do I say to help?” I asked and nodded toward Renee. “That lady was a big part of her life an’ I . . .” I rubbed my hand over the
back of my neck. “I ain’t got a clue about that stuff.”

  Nan swooshed to my side. “Stuff?”

  I waved my hand about. “Love stuff.”

  “Now what you talkin’ ’bout? You know all ’bout it.” She poked me and I got an icy shiver up my side.

  “I mean . . . that kinda love.” I shrugged. “How can I help if I don’t really get it.”

  Nan chuckled. “By being you.”

  I felt her fade and took a breath. Somehow I did that a lot before talking to Renee. Somehow it always felt like I was heading into a battle of some kind. A battle with whom, I weren’t real sure. I strolled over to her, hoping I could try and be calm. That maybe calm would help her.

  “Hey.” I took a seat on what had once been a tree of some kind. Now it was a stump and I mumbled a quiet warning to any critters who resided there. I hoped they didn’t have teeth or stings.

  “Hey.” Her aura seemed to sigh for her.

  “I don’t get sharing.” I shook my head at my own words. “I mean, I ain’t an expert or nothin’.”

  Renee stared out at the water which lapped against the bank.

  “What I mean is that I can’t offer no advice but . . . well . . . I know you’re hurtin’ an’ well . . .” I sighed and got off the stump as one critter objected to me being there. It had fangs of some sort and I weren’t looking to get acquainted with them. “That’s kinda it. I know you’re hurtin’ and I want to help.”

  Renee smiled. “She thinks I’m in love with someone else. It didn’t go down well.”

  That explained the fireworks in Fleming’s aura. “But she married somebody else.”

  Renee nodded.

  “So what gives her the right to get snippy?” I folded my arms. “If anybody should be mad, it should be you, right?”

  Renee’s gaze drifted back to the river. “Either way, I still hurt her and I didn’t want to.”

  “You got a good heart is why.” I walked a little way, not sure if I should get closer to her. Her aura was filled with so many things that I couldn’t read it.

  “Thank you.” She smiled but it was a sad one.

  “So what is it about this person, whoever she is, that has you all worried.” I shoved my hands in my pockets. “She that much of a mean, hardheaded person?”

  Renee laughed. “She’s the most wonderful, gentle, sweet person I’ve ever met.” She studied her fingers. “It’s not that I don’t want to tell her but she might not want to see it. It won’t make her a nasty person if she doesn’t feel the same way.” She sighed. “Knowing her, she’d be supportive even then.”

  “That ain’t enough, huh?” I stared at the water too.

  “It would hurt. It would hurt like Abby is hurting.” Renee bit her lip. “I’m not sure if I’m brave enough to cope with it.”

  I rubbed my neck again. I didn’t know how to help. I couldn’t make no one love her. I didn’t think she’d want me to. Love was a prickly subject I guessed. Folks got hurt. “You know, you always make me hear songs in my head.”

  Renee raised her eyebrows.

  “I like that.” I shrugged. “I ain’t sure why it is, but I like it.” I looked up to the stars. “Guess that ain’t much but . . . well . . . you’ll always have me around.”

  “I hear music too.”

  I chuckled. “That’s the radio in Frei’s car.”

  Renee got up and walked to my side. She looked up at the stars. “No, I mean that I hear music around you too.”

  I wrapped my arm around her shoulders. “Good. ’Cause whoever she is ain’t gettin’ you without a fight.” I winked at Renee. “Mrs. Squirrel an’ I don’t really want you changing who you are for nobody.”

  She squeezed me, her aura dancing the way I loved to see it. “You make me happy that I’m me.”

  Frei roared the car up to us and I nodded. “I’m happy you’re you too.”

  “Aeron . . .” Renee dropped her gaze to the car and then lifted it to me. “You know I’m here if you need to share.”

  “Hey, I like Frankenfrei, she’s cool and awesome but not in . . . well . . . not that kind of love.” I squeezed her and walked toward the car then stopped. “Besides, she ain’t you.”

  Renee smiled right the way through her aura. She held up her hand as I opened my mouth. “Don’t spoil it with a quip about your stomach.”

  It rumbled as if on command.

  “I’m more than just a chef, Lorelei.” Her tone shifted into playful as I clambered into the back seat next to her.

  Frei just rolled her eyes.

  I winked at her in the mirror. “Yeah, you’re some chef.”

  Renee poked me.

  Frei roared the car into life.

  “You cook a mean Croque Madame?”

  Renee scowled up at me. Her stomach rumbled and I grinned. “See, some part of you agrees.”

  Frei muttered something under her breath.

  Renee’s aura narrowed like her eyes. “It does not.”

  “Does too.”

  Frei slammed the car to a stop. “I haven’t eaten since . . . I don’t remember when. Stop. Talking. About. Food.”

  Renee and I exchanged a look. I knew I saluted. “Yes, ma’am.”

  Frei roared off again.

  “She’s kinda cranky when she’s hungry,” I whispered to Renee.

  “She’s cranky because she messed up her hair,” Renee shot Frei’s way, poking out her tongue.

  Frei raised a bored eyebrow and went back to driving.

  “Good to know that you missed us,” I said with a chuckle.

  “Not to mention the Lorelei family reunion,” Renee added. “You wait until they all start with the Nan-isms.”

  I smiled down at Renee. “Lucky, ain’t you?”

  “Yes.” Renee smiled up at me. “I think that maybe I might be.”

  I weren’t sure what was going on in her head but her aura did its little light show and I felt it warm me. I wasn’t sure if I’d helped her at all but I got the feeling she knew I was trying and it made a difference.

  Chapter 81

  FREI HAD A place about ten miles outside the city. Like Huber’s it had a lot of security and cameras but it was a lot nicer than Huber’s place had been. Frei told us that they used to be stables. I could see the look of interest pique in Renee’s eyes. She loved riding.

  Fleming, my mother, and Aunt Bess were waiting for us at the front entrance and Frei let us in through a rustic-looking door. It had a reddish glow to an oak feel. I fought the urge to run my hand over it.

  Inside, the floors were a real rich wood with beams cutting into the solid stone walls. She had a huge fireplace, a fluffy rug, and a sofa which was my size. Frei walked over to the wall, touched something and the fire roared into life.

  Cool.

  “Now we’re somewhere warm, Agent Frei, I’d like to know the real story.” Fleming took up residence in an armchair, crossed her legs, and placed her handbag beside her. She glared at Frei more than she had at Renee.

  “You were told it,” Frei answered. Unmoved, bored, her aura wriggling with her wish to find out if Jessie was okay.

  I met her eyes and smiled, nodding in the direction I could feel both Stosur and Jessie lurking in.

  Renee had her poker face on. My mother was the same; Aunt Bess too; I was half-ready to go and find Jessie and let the grown-ups talk.

  “Aeron.” Fleming turned her gaze to me and I tensed. “How are things outside the institution?”

  I opened my mouth to speak.

  “Don’t answer that,” Renee muttered, touching my arm.

  “Why, does she have something to hide?” Fleming shot a pleasant smile my way. Her voice and tone were gentle but her energy felt like she was ready to throw the glass beside her at me. Why was she mad at me too? I wasn’t gonna marry her.

  I lifted my chin. I weren’t ashamed. “I find it hard. Especially when people got issue with me an’ I don’t know why.”

  “Do you have an issue with autho
rity?” Her tone was much like Renee’s had been when I first met her, like a shrink. A shrink who was trying to push my buttons.

  “I’m vacationing with my bosses, what do you think?” I folded my arms. If she thought she could rile me up, she was gonna be disappointed.

  “So I see. Do they take good care of you?” Her tone made it sound like she was asking if they beat me.

  “Aeron, you don’t have to humor her.” Renee’s aura was on the defensive. She looked like she’d sock Fleming one just for speaking to me that way. I fought the urge not to grin and poke my tongue out at Fleming.

  “Yup.”

  Everybody stared at me.

  “I mean, they take me places and show me how to buy stuff. Sometimes they even let me out by myself.” I let out a breath. “You can’t leave folks like me too long though, we tend to wander off.”

  Renee blinked at me a few times. She knew I could fire off attitude when I wanted to but maybe it had been a while since she’d seen it. A smile rolled through her aura and she clenched her jaw like she was trying to stop it bursting through.

  “Aeron, I’m the head of the internal affairs department. Do you think it’s wise to talk to me with such disrespect?” Fleming had that tone on. Now I knew where Renee had learned it from.

  “I thought I didn’t have the ability to think for myself a second ago and now you want an opinion?” I raised my eyebrows as she narrowed her eyes. “Or maybe you just want to quit trying to get me to incriminate Renee so you can get your own back for her breaking your heart?”

  Fleming sucked in a breath.

  “I flattened the guy who hurt her.” I softened my tone. “Renee got the biggest heart and it ached that she had to do that to you.”

  “Aeron,” Renee whispered. “You don’t have to do this.”

  I nodded. “I do.” I walked over to Fleming and knelt in front of her. She flinched but I took her hand. “He hurt her so bad that she had to rebuild herself inside an’ out. I watch her cry, I watch her whimper and fight when she sleeps.” I held her gaze, forcing her to listen. “She cared about you so much she didn’t want you to see that.”

 

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