“This is Lily. Lily, that’s Chelle and Josh.” Preston gestured to the couple. “And this is Vicious.” Preston looked down at the bundle of joy I was petting. I smiled at the ironic name for the delightful creature.
Getting back to my feet, I noticed that everyone stood around grinning. They were all just so . . . there, smiling as though they all liked one another. No, not just liked, supported. Maybe even loved. No one seemed to be worried about a stranger among them. I suddenly felt out of place. This was all foreign to me. I needed to leave. I hadn’t counted on meeting anyone, and especially not everyone. I wasn’t ready. I hadn’t been mentally prepared.
“Nice to meet you all,” I managed to say and gave them all a tight smile. “I’m sorry. I was just leaving.”
“I’ll walk you out,” Preston said and placed his hand on the small of my back, leading me away from the group.
“Bye. Come back soon,” I heard one of the guys call out.
They were a family. I could sense the closeness, the love emanating from them and suffusing the air. It had been years since I’d witnessed anything like that. Not since . . . I didn’t want to think about that. That was another life. But I was sensitive to those emotions. I always had been, even when I was human. I wasn’t psychic, just susceptible to the feelings and attitudes of others. As a child, making friends had always been difficult as their feelings seemed to get in the way of my own. Maybe that was why I’d always hung out with my brother. His emotions were so similar to my own. My mother always told me I let people get to me more than I should. She’d never realized how right she was.
Preston insisted on driving me home, so I let him take me downtown. Close to the tower, but not close enough for him to know my final destination. I couldn’t let him take me all the way. He’d never understand. He didn’t want to let me go when I insisted on getting out of the car.
“I don’t like the idea of just dropping you off, Lily. I’m not that kind of man. I take care of what’s mine.”
His? My head spun with dizziness, my emotions out of control. I wanted to be Preston’s more than anything, but I was already Dorian’s. I even had the fucking brand to prove it. I shook my head. “I’m sorry. I really do need to go.”
He lifted the strands of my hair from my neck, exposing the tattoo as he stared at it. “I’m not stupid, Lily. I know you are deliberately avoiding telling me things about you. You won’t even give me the courtesy of telling me where you live. But you have to believe there is not a fucking thing in the goddamn world that you could tell me that would make me not want you.”
I wanted to tell him. I wanted to believe him, but I’d lived too long in this current state, and I knew exactly what Dorian could do. He was not someone to trifle with. I had already taken a great risk by going to Preston’s and staying so late. I had a bad feeling about what lay ahead for me when I walked in that door. I pressed my lips to Preston’s, and he kissed me. His hand tangled in my hair, then he pulled back. Fisting my hair in his hand, he tugged my head back so that my gaze found his. “Don’t go.”
My eyes closed then fluttered open. “I have to. Please. You have to trust me.”
“How can I trust you when you won’t give me anything to trust?”
“Trust that . . .” Dare I say it? What harm would it do? He might think it too sudden, but we’d been dancing around this relationship for a few months now. We were close friends, and now, lovers. And besides, I’d probably never get another chance to tell him if I didn’t take it now. “Trust that I love you, Preston,” I said, then opened the door and quickly got out of the car. I glanced around at the empty sidewalk and then disappeared from Preston’s sight before he could even open his car door to stop me.
Chapter Eleven
Preston
“Lily!” I shouted at the closed window as she de-materialized from my sight.
“Fuck!
“Fuck!
“Fuck!”
I banged my hands on the steering wheel. She was a puzzle with many facets. Her elusiveness frustrated the hell out of me, and her iron will would surely be the death of me. I didn’t know if I admired that about her or hated it. But I’d known from the start that she was stubborn. From the beginning, she’d presented herself as someone who knew how to take care of herself. She’d been on this earth a long time. Had been a vampire long enough to know how to survive. Mostly likely seen things most women hadn’t. She was tough; there was no doubt about that. But I worried.
I worried because she’d told me she loved me.
Not that I didn’t want that. I’d even thought about loving her, but I sensed her declaration was given out of desperation and fear that she might never be with me again.
I trolled the streets for another hour, looking for her dark purple coat, though deep down I knew I wouldn’t find her. I had to give up as the first light of day peeked over the bay bridge. I was about to get caught out in the sun, and I was still twenty minutes from the mansion. My eyes stung from the glare, and I slipped my glasses down over them so I could see the road. When I turned the corner, all cars ahead stood at a standstill. I’d hit the morning commute traffic. The twenty-minute drive to the mansion would now take me forty-five. Even if I tried to dematerialize back home, I’d lose too much energy and tumble to the ground. I wasn’t even sure I could. I considered just getting out of the car and trying to walk to shelter, but I feared someone would see me, think I needed help, and take me to the local hospital. I’d never survive that. My energy level had plummeted so fast, it was already almost completely gone.
I was fucked.
When traffic cleared, and I had a chance to move again, my car wouldn’t go. The engine had died. I tried to start it, but it wouldn’t even turn over. Fuck. Now what? I glanced at the gas gauge and realized it was on empty. I’d been so focused on finding Lily, I hadn’t bothered to check the gas level.
I sat inside the car, trying to make myself disappear without success when someone knocked on the window.
“Hey, dude. Move your car!”
Jesus. Now what am I supposed to do?
He pounded against the glass again. “Hey, asshole! Can you fucking hear me? Move your goddamn car! I need to get to work!”
I wished I could. When I didn’t respond, he cursed something unintelligible and strutted away. I had to try something. I managed to crawl into the back seat and crouched down on the floor. Luckily, this was a large Lincoln sedan, and the back seat was more than adequate for a vampire.
At that moment, I squeezed my eyes shut and concentrated with everything I had. A few seconds later, I found myself on the sidewalk with the sun glaring down on me. I hadn’t gotten very far when my energy gave out. My chest hurt, my limbs ached, the joints swollen with Rheumatoid arthritis—one of the first symptoms of sun damage for a vampire.
My eyesight blurred as I looked around. People ignored me as I huddled on the sidewalk close to the wall, most likely thinking I was a homeless vagrant strung out on drugs, particularly since I was shirtless and shoeless.
I spotted an alleyway. It wouldn’t shield me completely, but maybe there was a dumpster I could climb into. Pulling myself forward on my arms and stomach, I crawled toward the alley and turned the corner. The shade was only on one side, and I stayed in it. It didn’t stop the degeneration of my cells, but it slowed the process enough for me to see down the small street. “Fuck.” There were only two small trashcans set out. Nothing that my body would fit into. I inched my way to them and positioned myself between the two cans and the brick wall. My body shook with chills and burned with fever as I huddled there, unable to move. There was nothing else I could do. I didn’t think the sun would kill me, but the damage it was doing to my blood cells would take several days for me to recover from. That was if the damage didn’t get any worse. But the longer I stayed out, the worse it would get.
When Lily had said she loved me, perhaps she was psychic and realized she might never see me again. That this was my end. I wished I’d
told her the same. It was stupid of me to stay out so long looking for her. But I’d only had Lily on my mind. I hadn’t given a fucking thought to what might happen to me.
I didn’t recall ever hearing of a vampire who’d died from sun exposure, but then again, I’d never heard anything about what happened to someone left in the sun for longer than a few minutes. Most vamps were smart enough not to get themselves into this kind of predicament.
My chest hurt, and my breathing had become labored and was getting more difficult by the minute. My mouth was so dry, my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth, and I could literally feel my insides drying out, shriveling up like a piece of fruit inside a dehydration machine that someone had turned on high.
My mind traveled to a vision of Lily under me. She’d been everything I’d dreamed about for the past few months and more. I couldn’t have asked for a sweeter time. Then the vision disappeared. I couldn’t concentrate on her anymore. Was my brain shriveling up along with the rest of my insides? I held up my hand close to my eyes. The tips of my fingers were shriveled. My skin was scaly, and some of it flaked off the back of my hand.
Unable to hold up my head any longer, I lowered it to the ground, my eyelids too heavy to remain open. No longer conscious of what or who I was, I drifted into darkness.
Chapter Twelve
Lily
I couldn’t have asked for a more wonderful first experience of real lovemaking. Preston and I had had such a beautiful encounter. I had loved lying with him on that giant bed of his. The things he’d done to please me brought shivers to my body even now. The story of his turning had enthralled me. Not only was he great in bed, but he was a wonderful storyteller.
As I vanished from Preston’s sight, all I could think was how much I hated leaving him sitting in the car, shouting my name. That was the last thought I had of Preston because the moment I materialized inside my room, all those lovely moments were a thing of the past. Never to be spoken of or thought about again.
Dorian sat on the red velvet lounge in my room, waiting for me as I materialized.
“Hello, love.”
“Dorian.” My hand went to my heart. “You . . . startled me.” He was here, home from his trip early—two days early.
“Meant to. Where’ve you been?” His tone was casual, too calm for him to be sitting there so still, waiting for me—which I had no doubt he’d been doing. He lifted the small tumbler he held to his lips and took a small sip of the brown liquid, then lowered his arm, resting the glass on the armrest. The silk pajama pants he wore suggested he’d been home for a while. That meant he knew that I’d been gone for most of the night. Shit. I hadn’t counted on him coming home so soon. I had to think fast about where I’d been, but there was only one excuse I could give him that he would accept.
“Nowhere special. Just dealing the last of your heroin.” I shrugged out of my coat and went to my closet to hang it up.
He sighed, then placed the glass down on the small table beside the lounge and stood. As he walked toward me, his brown eyes turned darker. “Lily, I know there wasn’t any more shit to sell.”
“No. There was. Malik must have held some back because he had some left. He gave me a few more bags to sell so I could make up the cash I lost the other night.”
“You think I’m stupid?”
“Of course not.”
“Then why do you feed me lies that I know couldn’t possibly be true?”
“I’m not lying.”
“Okay, then where’s the cash?”
“I already gave it to Malik,” I lied and prayed Malik would back me up.
Before I knew or even saw him move, Dorian stood in front of me. He pressed me up against the wall, his hand squeezing my throat, his eyes dark with rage, and his face contorted to kill. I struggled to breathe as I stared back at him, my fingers clawing at his hands to release me. “I should kill you now, get it over with. The prospect of ending you has been something I’ve been contemplating. Or should I kill Julian?” he said through gritted teeth, his fangs glistening. My panic intensified at his words. “If I didn’t have a fondness for your brother, I would kill you both. Be done with you. I’m getting bored with the responsibility, to tell you the truth.”
He released his grip from around my neck and turned from me. I coughed, my hands massaging my throat.
Then he whirled back at me, pressing me up against the wall again, but he didn’t choke me this time, just pinned me. He was much stronger than I was. He always would be. Dorian had made me, giving me his blood. I only had a portion of the strength he had. He could kill me so easily, but in all these years, he never had. But he didn’t love me. He tolerated me. Kept me under his so-called protection. Kept other vampires from having me. Though he’d never wanted me for himself, he made it clear that no other male could touch me. Was that his way of torturing me? Depriving me of the pleasure I’d only just discovered with Preston? Dorian didn’t love me. He loved Julian. But Julian would only perform when he was weak, forced to wear silver, or lately, drugged with that Blaze drug Dorian had found that worked on vampires. Unable to defend himself. Dorian kept me so Julian would do his bidding. Julian protected me, and I protected Julian.
“Dorian, please,” I begged. “I’ll do better. I’m sorry. I won’t ever lie to you again. I promise.”
“What happened to you, Lily? Where did that timid little girl I’d grown to admire disappear to? You know the one. The scared little girl who begged me not to hurt her and her brother. The virgin I’ve been protecting for the past century. Tell me, Lily, where did she go?”
He bit his lower lip and tilted his head and grinned. “You are still a virgin, are you not?”
I nodded, trying my best to hide the lie I’d just promised never to tell again.
“Ah, Lily, you make me do such hurtful things. Things I don’t want to do. Hurting you is never my intention, but I need you to obey me. Now, tell me, where were you all night?”
“I told you. I was out selling for you. It was hard to find buyers. I had to visit almost all of my clients. That’s a lot of territory to cover in one night. But no one was buying. I finally found a couple of junkies down in the Marina district who were just coming down from a high. I’m sorry I was so late. I went straight to Malik, knowing he would be worried. I gave him the money. I swear.”
I watched Dorian’s Adam’s apple move as he swallowed. He nodded. “Okay. I believe you,” he said and then stepped away from me.
The tension weighing down my shoulders refused to ease even though Dorian seemed to believe me. The possibility of him suddenly turning back around and punishing me anyway was always very high. Dorian’s moods changed faster than I could track. He could be as gentle as a kitten at times, then as mean and sly as a viper the next moment.
He headed for the door but turned back before leaving. “Next time, don’t expect me to be so forgiving.” Then he left. I sighed, shrouded with both sadness and relief at the sound of the door locking. Frustration grew within me because I knew the moment the lock turned, the walls became impenetrable, as well. I was Dorian’s prisoner again. Both Julian and I were. Death was surely better than this.
I went to my bed, taking my pillow in my arms, caressing it as if it could comfort me when I all I really wanted was to know that Preston would forgive me for leaving the way I had and that my brother was okay.
I thought about Preston and how easy it had been to talk to him. Recounting the experience of how we had become what we were. It had been so many years since I’d thought about it, I’d had to stop the story. I had trouble remembering exactly the way it had all happened.
We’d been running for what seemed like hours, dodging horses and carriages, ducking into alleyways, and hiding in alcoves and behind anything we happened upon. Our neighbor, Mrs. Rosen, was dead. Blood pooled around her head, her neck had been torn to shreds by some sick creature. We were scared that whatever had done that to her, was still inside, so we ran. After hours of running and hidi
ng, our clothes were covered with mud from the rain-soaked roads we’d been trekking through. The air was cold and wet. And help was nowhere in sight. The sky was so dark, and clouds shrouded the stars and poured rain down so fast it blurred our vision. There was no place to hide. We were cold, hungry, and drenched to the bone when Julian suggested we go home. He was convinced that whatever monster had murdered Mrs. Rosen would be long gone and that the police would have come and discovered her body. The monster would have fled. I agreed, so we headed home. Though the minute we entered our apartment, we instantly realized we’d been wrong.
Julian towered over me as the dark figure stood in front of us in the small living space we called home. Except for the trickle of moonlight coming in from the window, the room was mostly dark, and all I could make out was the black-hooded cloak and the pale hand that gripped my brother’s neck, snatching him up as if he were no heavier than a ragdoll. Julian’s body seemed lifeless, his mind not registering what was happening to him. I wanted him to struggle and fight.
I wanted to scream, but the creature’s eyes glowed with a golden hue as they locked with mine, and my body froze as the scream that had been on my lips became nothing more than silent air. My limbs were paralyzed, unable to move. The monster threw back the hood of his cloak and continued to hold my gaze with his. Time froze, and the air in the room stilled as I continued to stare at his face. A beautiful face. So handsome.
The vampire dragged his golden orbs from mine and gazed upon my brother’s face with a reverence I’d never seen anyone possess before. He held Julian’s flaccid body close to him, kissed my brother’s cheek, and then slowly, with care, sank his fangs into Julian’s neck. Not viciously. But with great care.
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