Sea Monsters and Other Delicacies

by David Sinden

  Ulf sat on an upturned bucket just inside the door. “We can save it,” he said to the giant. “We can use Professor Farraway’s venom extractor.”

  “Redbacks are dangerous,” Orson told him. “I’m sure Dr. Fielding knows best.”

  The giant reached into a barrel and took out a handful of apples. Then he sat down, leaning against the huge mound of grain. “At least it’s had a long life,” he said. Orson popped three apples into his mouth and offered one to Ulf. “Once upon a time sea monsters never grew to be that size. The poor things were killed before they had the chance.”

  “Killed?” Ulf asked. He took a bite of his apple, and chewed.

  “Not any more, Ulf. It’s illegal to harm a sea monster now. Professor Farraway put a stop to it. Once upon a time, though, they were killed and eaten. They were boiled up, their tentacles chopped off and their brains scooped out.”

  Ulf stopped chewing. “That’s horrible,” he said.

  The giant leaned forward. “Humans,” he whispered. “Humans very nearly killed them all.”

  Ulf heard footsteps in the yard. He poked his head out of the feed store and saw a yellow light outside.

  “Who’s that?” Orson asked him.

  It was Captain Crab carrying his lantern. The Captain stepped through the door of the feed store. “Nice place you have here, Mr. Orson,” he said.

  The Captain hung his lantern on a nail on the back of the door, and took a canteen out of his pocket. “Mind if I join you?”

  The Captain pulled the cork from the canteen with his teeth. He took a long drink and smiled. “That hits the spot,” he said.

  “What have you got in there?” Orson asked.

  “Captain’s special,” the Captain replied. “There’s nothing better than a drop of special before bed.” He leaned against the barrel of apples and offered the canteen to Orson. “Would you like some?”

  The giant took the canteen in his fingers and swallowed a big mouthful of the drink. Then he rubbed his belly. “Tasty,” he said, handing it back.

  Captain Crab shook it. The canteen was empty. “Thirsty, eh, Mr. Orson? There’s plenty more where that came from. Tomorrow I’ll fetch you some from my boat.”

  Ulf dropped his apple core into a box marked TIDBITS FOR NIBBLING BEASTS, then got up from the bucket. “Thanks for the apple, Orson,” he said. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “You try to get some sleep,” Orson told him. “You need to be strong for your transformation.”

  As Ulf stepped to the door of the feed store, Captain Crab took down his lantern. “I guess I’d better be off to bed, too,” he said. “Good night, Mr. Orson.”

  Ulf walked around the side of the big beast barn, heading along the paddock to his den.

  “Psst,” he heard.

  Ulf turned. Captain Crab was following him.

  “You could save that sea monster, you know,” the Captain whispered. His eyes glinted as his lantern swung on his hook. “You could use that venom extractor.” He took a step closer. “You’re not scared, are you?”

  Ulf shook his head.

  “I like you, werewolf. You’re just like old Farraway.”

  The Captain rubbed the few coarse hairs on the side of Ulf’s face. “Sleep tight,” he said, then he turned and headed back toward Farraway Hall, whistling as he went.

  Ulf watched the Captain go, then walked to his den. He lay in the straw, thinking about the sea monster.

  He looked out through the bars. Farraway Hall was still and quiet. He saw Druce the gargoyle hanging from the gutter, peering into a window on the top floor of the house. The gargoyle dropped onto the window ledge as a light came on. It was Captain Crab’s lantern. He was returning to his room.

  The gargoyle blew a raspberry at the Captain’s window then scurried up a drainpipe to the roof. In the quiet of the night Ulf could hear the gargoyle’s croaky voice gurgling: “He won’t get me! He won’t get me! I bited his finger and he won’t get me!”

  Chapter 10

  FAR OUT AT SEA, A ROWBOAT WAS BOBBING LOW in the water, weighed down by two men and a pile of bulging brown sacks. Waves were splashing over its side.

  The big man Bone was rowing. “Throw another one in,” he said.

  The small man Blud was sitting in the back of the boat, shining a flashlight near his feet. Metal pins from hand grenades lay scattered on the floor around him. “We’ve used them all up,” he said.

  He shone his flashlight on the waves, lighting up the bodies of dead and dying fish floating in the sea. “Look, there’s something over there,” he said.

  Bone rowed the boat through the fish, knocking them out of the way. He stopped beside a dead sea beast that was floating among them. It looked like a pink shark with large claws and a spiny tail.

  “What is it?” Blud asked.

  Bone prodded the beast with his oar. “Dunno, but it’s got a bit of meat on it. Let’s stick it in the sack.” He reached over, hauling the beast out of the water, and shoved it inside a large sack from the pile.

  “Now let’s get out of here,” Blud said. “Boats make me sick.”

  Bone rowed quickly toward a huge old oil rig. Its high platform loomed over them on four rusty metal columns. They moored the rowboat to one of the columns, then carried the heavy sacks up a metal ladder, dragging them across the vast platform to a small black hut.

  Blud knocked at the door of the hut and waited.

  “Come,” a voice called from inside.

  Blud opened the door. The hut was hot and steamy. Pots were bubbling on a cooker and sizzling sounds were coming from an oven.

  A fat man with a thin mustache was busy chopping onions on a metal counter. He wore a white chef’s apron and a tall chef’s hat.

  “We’ve got the food, Mr. Ravioli,” Blud said.

  “Aboutta time. Bring it here,” Franco Ravioli the chef said, pointing with his knife to a large metal counter.

  Bone dragged in the heavy sacks. Spiky tails and hairy flippers were poking from their tops. They were stuffed full with dead sea beasts. He emptied one of the sacks onto the counter.

  Franco Ravioli lifted up a spiny golden beast by its tail.

  “Magnifico! A baby anglodon,” the chef said. “I shall cut it into steaks and pan fry it with olive oil and herbs.” Blud and Bone licked their lips.

  “What else did you get?” Franco Ravioli asked.

  From another sack, Blud pulled out a long slimy beast with an even longer slimier trunk.

  “Splendido! An elephant eel,” Franco Ravioli said. “I shall stuff its trunk and grill it. Next.”

  Bone pulled out a round blue beast with a huge mouth and fat lips.

  “Fantastico! A lubbalubba. The kissing beast. I shall cut off its lips and boil them in stock.”

  Bone picked out a dozen tiny sea creatures that looked like fairies. They had flippers instead of wings.

  “Marveloso!” Franco Ravioli said. “Water nymphs.”

  He held a water nymph by its flipper and dangled it in front of him. “I shall deep-fry them in batter. Next.”

  Blud and Bone pulled out beast after beast, stacking them in a big brightly-colored pile on the counter. Some were slimy and slipped off, and the larger ones hung over the edge, their tails and whiskers drooping to the floor.

  Franco Ravioli rummaged through the dead beasts. “Bazooka rays, serpents, diamond crabs, megamauls, skewerheads. Hmmm…I shall need more than this,” he told them.

  “More?” Blud asked. “How many more?”

  “Many, many, many more. I have a Beast Feast to prepare,” the fat chef said. “And where is the main course? Where is the sea monster?”

  “The Baron is bringing it,” Blud told him.

  “And what about dessert?”

  “He’s bringing dessert as well,” Bone added. “He says it’s a surprise.”

  “A surprise? Franco Ravioli hates surprises.” He dabbed his forehead with a cloth. “Now go and get me some more beasts.”

&nbs
p; He waddled across the kitchen to check on his bubbling pots.

  “Mr. Ravioli?” Blud said, putting his hand up.

  Franco Ravioli turned. “What do you want now?”

  “Have you got anything we can eat?”

  “Get outta ma face. Franco Ravioli cooks only for paying customers.”

  “But we’re hungry,” Bone said.

  “Hungry, eh?”

  Franco Ravioli dragged the baby anglodon from the pile of dead beasts. The chef ran his knife up the anglodon’s belly, slitting it open, then shoved his hand in and pulled out two half-digested sardines from its stomach.

  “Here you are,” Franco Ravioli said, smiling. “You can have these. Don’t eat them all at once.”

  He handed the sardines to Blud and Bone.

  Blud sniffed his and wrinkled his nose.

  “Now get out! I have a Beast Feast to prepare!”

  Chapter 11

  THE NEXT MORNING ULF WOKE LATE AGAIN. He crawled from the straw and looked outside. The sun was already high in the sky, and he could see Dr. Fielding’s Jeep driving up the track through the beast park.

  Ulf wiped the sleep from his eyes and went to meet her. “How’s the sea monster?” he asked, running into the yard.

  Dr. Fielding stepped out of her Jeep. She picked up a folder from the passenger seat. “Can you come inside a second, Ulf?”

  Ulf followed Dr. Fielding into the house. She went to her exam room, a clean white room full of medical equipment for examining beasts. “It’s bad news, I’m afraid,” she said. From her folder, Dr. Fielding took out an X-ray printout. She clipped it to a light box on the wall. “I thought you should see this. I took it an hour ago. The bleeding has worsened.”

  Ulf looked at the X-ray. The shadow on the sea monster’s brain had doubled in size.

  “I’m sorry, but it hasn’t got much longer to live,” Dr. Fielding said.

  “How long?” Ulf asked, staring at the X-ray.

  “A few hours.”

  Ulf pulled the X-ray from the light box. “We can’t let it die,” he said.

  Dr. Fielding put her hand on Ulf’s shoulder. “I’m sorry, Ulf. I’ve been up all night studying every piece of information we have on sea monsters, and there’s nothing we can do.”

  “Yes there is,” Ulf said.

  He ran out of the exam room and across the corridor to Dr. Fielding’s office. The venom extractor was on her desk. Ulf grabbed it and ran into the yard. He jumped onto his ATV and kick-started the engine.

  Dr. Fielding came running out of the house. “Ulf!” she called.

  Ulf wedged the venom extractor between his legs then twisted back the throttle, accelerating past the veterinary buildings. “Open!” he shouted, speeding through the yard gate and into the beast park. He raced along the track, past the aviary and biodomes, around the foot of Troll Crag and down the edge of the marsh, the back wheels of his ATV spinning in the mud. As he rode onto the bridge by Sunset Mountain, he glanced back. Dr. Fielding was following in her Jeep, driving out after him.

  Ulf twisted the throttle and accelerated around the base of the mountain, racing to the seawater lagoon. He sped onto the dock and pulled up with a screech.

  He turned off the engine and jumped off his bike, clutching the venom extractor in his hand.

  As he ran to the examination bay, Ulf saw Captain Crab waving from his boat. He was holding a wrench and an oily rag. “That’s it, werewolf!” the Captain called. “You can do it!”

  Ulf stood at the edge of the examination bay and looked down into the water. He could see the huge sea monster, its tentacles coiling and thrashing.

  Gripping the handles of the venom extractor, Ulf took a deep breath and jumped.

  Chapter 12

  ULF HIT THE COLD WATER AND HIS BODY GAVE A shudder. His chest tightened, his wet T-shirt and jeans clinging to his skin.

  The sea monster was struggling at the front of the examination bay. It was banging its shell against the underwater gate to the lagoon. Five of its tentacles were thrashing wildly, coiling up the walls. Its other three tentacles hung limply, dragging along the concrete floor.

  Ulf dived down clutching the handles of the venom extractor.

  The huge sea monster turned, opening its green eyes. It let out a low, menacing bellow and its tentacles whipped down from the walls and started lashing through the water.

  Ulf steadied himself, cold with dread, as the sea monster loomed large, trying to pull itself toward him. Its body was tilting to one side and its tentacles were jerking.

  Suddenly, one of the tentacles lashed forward through the water. Ulf dived beneath it and the tentacle went crashing against the side of the examination bay.

  Another tentacle swept up and Ulf felt its barnacles scrape against his leg, knocking him sideways.

  He heard a thudding sound and looked behind him. He could see Dr. Fielding at the window of the viewing gallery. She was banging on the glass.

  He turned back as another tentacle came thrashing toward him. It whacked him in the stomach, sending him somersaulting backward through the water. He tried to steady himself, kicking his legs, and another tentacle swept over his head. He could see the sea monster moving toward him, getting closer.

  Gripping the venom extractor in one hand, Ulf stared into the sea monster’s green eyes. They were blazing angrily.

  There was a low scraping sound and a rumble of rocks as the sea monster’s mouth opened like a cave. Ulf could see the half-eaten sharks floating inside. It was preparing to feed.

  His heart was thumping in his chest.

  He saw the stinger emerging from its hole. The snakelike limb slid out through the coral, pulsing with ice-blue venom. It weaved toward him, sensing his heartbeat.

  Ulf trembled as the stinger flicked out its tongue.

  At that moment, a tentacle swung around and struck Ulf on the back, knocking the venom extractor from his hands. It rose through the water, the air in the leather ball carrying it upward. The tentacle slid around him, its oily suckers gripping his waist.

  Ulf stretched upward, reaching for the venom extractor, but it was floating away from him. Desperate, he kicked and struggled, clawing at the tentacle around his waist, trying to prize the suckers off. Black oil seeped out from them into the water.

  He glanced at the stinger. Its blue tip was opening, its fangs ready to strike.

  I’m going to die, he thought. He had to get the venom extractor.

  He wriggled and squirmed, pulling at the tentacle.

  As the oil leaked from its suckers, Ulf felt the tentacle’s grip loosening. He kicked his legs and pushed with all his strength. Gradually he slid from the sea monster’s grip, then shot upward and pulled the venom extractor down in front of him.

  The stinger struck for his heart and Ulf felt an almighty thump as the venom extractor banged against his chest, protecting him. The stinger was locked on to the ball, its fangs piercing the leather. The venom extractor was shaking.

  Ulf gripped the handles tightly, struggling to hold on. His knuckles were white and his arms ached.

  The stinger thrashed, convulsing like a whip.

  His heart was hammering in his chest. He could feel the ball getting colder as the stinger pumped its venom. The freezing venom was collecting inside, trickling down into the flask.

  The stinger’s blue tip was pulsating. Its venom sacks were emptying.

  The venom extractor was working.

  Ulf watched as the stinger gradually changed color from blue to black.

  Suddenly, it released the ball. The stinger swayed in front of Ulf, flicking out its tongue. Its venom sacks were empty. Ulf saw its black tip coming closer. It snaked up and down his body, probing him inquisitively. It seemed curious that he was still moving.

  Ulf reached out and touched it. The stinger felt hard and scaly. It pulled back from his hand, then retreated, snaking back to its hole in the sea monster’s shell.

  Ulf looked to the viewing gallery. Dr. Fiel
ding was calling to him from the window.

  He kicked hard, swimming upward to the surface.

  A huge hand reached into the water, dragging him out. It was Orson. Ulf came up, gasping for air, and Orson lifted him onto the dock.

  Dr. Fielding ran up from the viewing gallery and threw her arms around Ulf, hugging him, rubbing him to warm him up. “Don’t ever do anything like that again!”

  Ulf was shivering. His teeth were chattering from the cold. “It w-works,” Ulf gasped. “Professor Farraway’s v-v-v-venom ex-x-xtractor w-works.”

  Dr. Fielding took the venom extractor and ran her fingers over the fang holes in the leather ball. “I can’t believe it,” she murmured. “It’s extraordinary.” She unscrewed the flask and looked inside. It was full with ice-blue venom.

  “It really did work, Dr. Fielding,” Orson said.

  “Professor Farraway used to swim with sea monsters,” Ulf told her. “That’s how he did it. The Redback’s stinger can’t hurt you without its venom.”

  “Hooray for the werewolf!” Ulf heard. He looked up. Captain Crab was standing on the deck of his boat, holding his wrench. “I knew you’d save it!”

  “We can operate now,” Ulf said to Dr. Fielding. “It’s safe to go near it.”

  Dr. Fielding gave Ulf’s shoulder a squeeze. “You should go and get dry,” she told him.

  “I’m fine,” Ulf said, standing up. “I want to stay and help.”

  Dr. Fielding looked up at Orson. “Do you think you could raise the sea monster to the surface?” she asked.

  “No problem,” the giant said. He strode over to the marine store.

  “Come on then, Ulf,” Dr. Fielding said. “Let’s fix this sea monster’s brain.”

  Chapter 13

  ULF HELPED ORSON ROLL EIGHT YELLOW FLOTATION barrels across the dock into the examination bay.