Scarred: Sins and Secrets Series of Duets

by Willow Winters

  “There are worse things you could do,” Mason says and my attention returns to him.

  “I can’t lose her,” I tell him and he nods his head.

  “I’ll watch her myself,” he offers and a small sense of peace relaxes me, but only a fraction of the way.

  I rub my eyes with the back of my hand and finally pick up the beer on the table.

  “If anything happens to her … ”

  “Nothing’s going to happen to her,” he reassures me before asking, “And what’s the third thing?”

  I look him in the eyes and tell him, “I want him to go to jail for what he did. Whether you get real evidence or have to create some. And if that’s not possible, I want James Lapour dead.”

  Chapter 12

  Kat

  * * *

  Lonely isn’t so bad,

  There’s life within, you see.

  There’s faith and so much more to come,

  With the fate of what’s to be.

  The memories that haunt the night,

  Die in time as the sky turns cold.

  There’s hope that comes in morning,

  And a day that’s left to be told.

  “I thought you were taking time off?” Sue says and brings me back to the present.

  I didn’t even hear her come in. I glance at the clock in the upper right of my computer screen. It’s already five o’clock and time for our dinner date. The girls are taking turns keeping me occupied. It’s almost like they’re babysitting me and if it was anyone else, I’d hate it.

  But I can never turn down a date with Suzette.

  “You of all people should know that working is all I’m good for.” My voice comes out flat although I meant for it to be funny. God, I’m tired. I’m always tired now even though I’m finally starting to sleep like the dead.

  I guess the first trimester of pregnancy will do that to you.

  “Oh honey, have you not looked at your shoe collection recently?” she asks, quirking a brow. “You’re good for so much more than work.”

  I stand up slowly, letting my body stretch as I do and smile at her. “Ha-ha,” I say sarcastically, but the smile on my lips is genuine.

  “So, what place tonight?” she asks as she turns on a lamp in the corner of the office and settles into the one comfy chair in the room … which isn’t even the desk chair.

  “Order in, takeout, getting pretty and hitting the town?” she suggests then takes her scarf off slowly and looks around the office.

  “Why the hell haven’t you decorated this room?” she asks me before I can answer the first question. I scratch the back of my head as I look around. I have a bookshelf in the back, but all the books are still in boxes on the floor.

  “Just not a priority,” I tell her honestly. “I look at the screen more than anything anyway.”

  “It’s like your décor inspiration was a depressing cubicle.”

  I snort at her response, but it makes me laugh so hard.

  “Maddie should focus on redecorating in here before planning a baby shower.”

  I think the remark wasn’t meant to be taken seriously, but I actually love the idea.

  “I should tell her. I’d like that.”

  Sue shrugs, twisting the scarf around her hand as she crosses her legs. “I’m sure she’d love to.”

  “Well, actually. I totally forgot to tell you, but I may move in with Jules for a little while.”

  Sue leans forward with her mouth a bit more open than it should be before she says, “You sure you want to have to hear them when they fuck? I feel like that’s the number one concern here.”

  I roll my eyes at her. “It was Mason’s suggestion, so I’m sure he … ” Ugh. The thought of them doing it in the room next to me is a thought I’d rather not picture.

  “I get it,” Sue says, sensing exactly what was on my mind. “You shouldn’t be alone anyway. Not when you have so many people who love you.”

  I shut down my laptop and just give her a tight smile.

  She adds, “’Cause you’re not alone, and there’s no reason you should feel it right now.”

  “Damn it Sue, stop it,” I tell her and shake off the emotions as they creep up on me. “I’m fine.”

  “I know you are!” she says, pushing herself up from the seat. “And that’s why we’re going to go out and go somewhere fabulous.”

  My phone dings on the desk, indicating a text as I start to tell Sue that I don’t really want to go out.

  I let out a yawn as I cautiously look at the message. I’ve had four texts today already. Each from a gossip column editor wanting a statement on my reaction to the recent events. Evan’s been spotted with Samantha again and the rumor mill is churning with tales of scandal.

  They can go fuck themselves. I believe that was my response for each of the columnists. Probably not the best quote I’ve ever given.

  “You okay?” Sue asks and I nod when I see it’s just from Henry.

  He keeps messaging me, which makes the fact that Evan hasn’t bothered to call me back that much harder to take.

  “Just Evan’s dad. Wanting to drop by with some lemons.”

  “Lemons?” she questions.

  “He said they helped Marie when she was pregnant and nauseated.”

  “But you aren’t … ” Sue trails off with a hint of confusion.

  “I know!” I answer jokingly as I text Henry, Thank you, but I’m fine. I question if I should ask him how Evan is. Where he is. Or anything at all.

  Before I can, he answers that he wants to meet up for lunch soon.

  “You know, he’s real sweet,” I tell Sue, feeling guilty and torn on what to do.

  “So where’d his son get his charm from then?” Sue asks sarcastically and then mouths that she’s sorry when she sees I’m not amused.

  “I’ll just tell him I will, but I can always bail,” I say out loud as if I need her approval.

  “Yeah, that’s a good way to handle it,” she says and then looks me up and down. “You should probably put real clothes on.”

  “How fancy?” I ask her, setting the phone down as I realize I’m still in sweats and a baggy t-shirt.

  “Let’s go fancy fancy.” I hope she can see how the thought of getting prettied up makes me perk up. I could really use a night out, feeling beautiful and carefree. A nice distraction.

  “Fancy-pantsing it up tonight?” I ask her, already feeling better than I did before she got here.

  “You know it.”

  Chapter 13

  Evan

  * * *

  Hold back the anger,

  For it makes you blind.

  Hold back your revenge,

  It clouds and fogs your mind.

  The secrets left in shadows,

  Drift closer in the night.

  They leave you left with nothing,

  Only monsters left to fight.

  * * *

  All I can focus on are his tells.

  You learn them fast in the line of business that led me to this moment. The sweat on his brow. The way his foot won’t stay still. His dilated pupils and quick breathing.

  He’s one of two things. High as a fucking kite, or going through withdrawal.

  And judging by the look on this fucker’s face, James Lapour is ready for his next hit.

  I peek over my shoulder. His office is on the first floor. There are apartments above us and plenty of witnesses in case some shit goes down. But just outside those doors is Mason, sitting in a car and waiting for me in case I need him.

  I’ve got two goals coming in here like this.

  Warn him to back the fuck off.

  Get any evidence I can.

  Seeing as how he’s in his office, goal number two will have to wait unless I can get a confession. I slip the tape recorder on, and do everything I can to keep my hate down. But the image of Kat from the night terrors is all I can see. I can’t sleep; I can’t do anything without thinking about losing her. I feel like I’m losin
g my sanity. I have to hesitate and focus. Blinking away the picture of her, I prepare to do what I have to.

  “Taking a break from the snow?” I ask him as I walk into the room. I’ve been standing outside the open door to his office just watching him for a few minutes. He didn’t change the locks and there’s no one else here on a late Wednesday night. Just him and me. Well not quite, there are a few broads in the far back. I can hear them from here. Maybe they’re waiting for him with exactly what he needs. I wouldn’t be surprised.

  “What the fuck are you doing here?” he sneers at me.

  “I just want to know why, really.” I say the words easily as I walk closer to him. The city lights outside give the room a glow, but with the blinds drawn and only the lamp on his desk illuminating the space, it’s darker than I’d like it to be in here.

  “Why what exactly?” he asks me, leaning back in his seat and I can faintly hear him pulling out a drawer slowly.

  I rack the slide on the gun in my hand and raise it slowly. “Uh, uh, uh,” I reprimand him. It’s been a long fucking time since I’ve aimed a gun at someone. I’ve never wanted to pull the trigger more though.

  “I wouldn’t do anything fast if I were you,” I tell him.

  He raises his hands slowly, cocking his head and letting out a sick laugh. “So you here to kill me now? Is that it?”

  “I should, shouldn’t I?”

  “For what, exactly? Spit it out, you coward,” he scoffs at me. His eyes are so bloodshot, they’re nearly black with the lack of light.

  “I’m the coward?” I ask him with ridicule. I have to be careful with the loaded gun. I nearly point it at myself like a dumbass. My anger is putting me on edge, my adrenaline pumping hard and every second that passes makes my body temperature go up just a little more.

  One of the girls from the back room yells out, “You alright in there?” in response to my raised voice.

  Before I can say shit, James answers them. “Just stay where you’re put.” Good old James, he knows how to talk to the ladies.

  “What do you want, Evan?” he asks me, slowly laying his hands on the desk, palms down.

  His arm twitches and I can tell he’s fucked up.

  “What’s going on with you?” I ask him. “You’re not looking so good.”

  “You look pretty fucked yourself,” he tells me, forcing a smile onto his face.

  “We saw you watching,” I tell him.

  “What’s that?” he asks.

  “At Rockefeller Center.”

  “Is that so?” I hate this game he’s playing. This tit for tat where no real information is given. “And what exactly was I watching?” he asks with a smirk on his face although I can see in his eyes that he’s curious.

  I shrug and say, “Doesn’t matter, does it? What I want to know is what you plan on doing.”

  He laughs abruptly, deep and from his gut, but any trace of happiness is immediately replaced with pain. He nearly doubles over and I raise the gun again, my heart beating hard as I prepare for him to come up with a weapon.

  He doesn’t though and when he sees the gun aimed right between his eyes, he forces his hands in the air again.

  “You stop doing coke? I guess Tony told you it was bad for you,” I tell him flatly, swallowing thickly as my hands sweat and the gun feels heavier.

  He groans an answer I can’t hear and then he winces again.

  “What the fuck is wrong with you? Withdrawal?”

  “Fuck you,” he manages to get out.

  “You paranoid now? That someone’s going to do to you what you tried to do to me?”

  He opens his eyes slowly, the light shining from the lamp creating shadows on his face. “The fuck you talking about?”

  “The coke you laced. You scared someone’s going to do the same to you? Give you what you have coming?”

  “It was my personal stash, you prick.”

  I almost call him a liar, I almost tell him to shove it and put a bullet in his chest so I can get back to Kat and end this shit. But the look on his face stops me.

  He’s always been a damn good liar though.

  “If I wanted you dead … well, I know how to use a gun.”

  “You want to know what I think?” I ask him, although I already know the answer.

  “Sure, you can say that I’m intrigued,” he retorts.

  “I think you’re greedy,” I tell him as I lower the gun.

  “Greedy?” he says back with a crooked smile.

  “I think you wanted to prove a point to your wife.” I lay it out there for him. I’m not messing around; I want this prick to know that I’m fully aware of what he’s doing.

  “That bitch, she’s got nothing to do with this.”

  “Who does then?” I ask him.

  His bottom lip lowers, but then his mouth slams shut. “Fuck you.”

  “I won’t stop until I find out everything. Until every bit of dirt I can get on you is dug up and exposed.”

  “You know how much shit I’ve got on you, Thompson?” He seems to find his strength as he leans forward on his desk.

  “This is a warning to stay away. From me and Samantha.” I almost bring up Kat. I almost say she’s pregnant. That family’s off-limits. But that would only give him that much more of a reason to hurt her. So I keep her name out of my mouth, I keep her safe.

  “So it’s true then?” he asks with a snort of a laugh. “You two are together?”

  With the visions of Kat in my head, I almost think he’s talking about her. That he knows we’re back together. It takes me a moment before I realize he’s talking about Samantha and referring to the rumors. Thank fuck. “She came to me for help.”

  “I always knew she’d cross me. I didn’t think you’d be the dumb fuck she picked to go down with her.”

  I raise the gun and take a step closer. “Give me one reason I shouldn’t kill you right now. You and I both know you deserve it.”

  He shrugs. “I have the evidence that proves you lied to the cops, for one. I have evidence on both you assholes.”

  “A dead man can’t do shit with evidence.”

  “The cops will find it, and you know it. You don’t want them messing around in here.”

  “What are you doing back here, baby?” A high-pitched voice rings through the hallway and I look quickly over my shoulder. I hear the door open and James smiles.

  “Oh yeah, there are two other reasons. In all the years I’ve known you, you’ve never put your hands on a woman. Well other than Sam, I mean.”

  “Shut the fuck up,” I spit out through my clenched teeth.

  “Come on back, baby!” he yells out. He’s calling my bluff and I’m quick to put the gun down, hiding it behind my leg.

  My heart beats slowly and I can see it all playing out. Killing this fucker and the two of them screaming, running. I can see the red, blue, and white lights, reflecting off the glass.

  “Are you ready for us?” A young woman walks in, skinny as a rail with a sharp blonde bob. It looks so perfectly straight, I think it’s a wig.

  The smell of perfume floods the room as she walks in, swaying her hips and wearing shorts that ride up her ass.

  Hookers.

  “Let me just finish this conversation real quick,” James says and the second girl walks in a bit behind the first. The blonde rounds the desk, peeking at me, but stalks toward James to perch on the corner of his desk.

  “Whatever you want. I’m not in a rush.”

  “Hi there,” a little brunette says. Her voice is softer, sweeter even, which matches her look. She’s got a vibe that’s more innocent, with clothes that actually cover her ass. But her eyes are bloodshot and she can barely walk straight. She tries to lean against me, but I take a step back and when I do she sees my gun.

  Her eyes widen and she stumbles backward with a gasp. The two girls exchange a look while holding their breath, both of them on edge and realizing they shouldn’t have walked back here.

  “I was just on
my way out,” I tell them slowly. I don’t need them calling the cops and getting my ass locked up for some dumb shit. I tuck the gun back into the waist of my jeans.

  “I just want to ask one question before you leave, Thompson,” James says to my back as I turn away.

  “So wives aren’t off-limits anymore, are they?” he asks. My blood rushes into my ears and I almost do it. I almost kill that fucker, consequences be damned.

  “Ah, I see not all the rumors are true. Are they, Evan?”

  “Leave her the fuck alone, James.” My blood pumps hot as I stare into his beady eyes. But all he does is smile.

  And that’s what I dream about tonight. The piece of the nightmare that I’ve added. His fucking smile while I hold my wife’s dead body.

  Chapter 14

  Kat

  * * *

  Just hold on a bit longer,

  I’m not ready for you to go.

  I made mistakes, I didn’t say—

  Come back, for you should know.

  I didn’t tell you I loved you,

  Or that I’m sorry I didn’t stay.

  I wasn’t true to you or me,

  And now you’ve gone away.

  It’s been three days now.

  And Evan hasn’t texted or come back.

  I texted and called, remembering how he said he loved me and this was only going to last for a short while. It was pathetic of me.

  I’m lonely, emotional, pregnant. I was desperate to believe he still loved me.

  The text was simple. It’s really hard without you. I’m sorry; I was wrong to give you an ultimatum. Please forgive me. I miss you and I really need you. That’s what being lonely does to me. It makes me wish he’d just come back to me.

  And I got nothing back.

  I thought it would get easier, but somehow Evan refusing to text me back is making it harder. He doesn’t return my calls. Nothing. The only contact I have with him is an excerpt from the Page Six column quoting him as saying that we’ve split.