“We all know things we shouldn’t,” Jamie said. “All the time.”
“He may know you work for us or he may not. But it’s no secret Rob worked for the FBI. Or that the two of you were engaged. We can bet by now a lot of people know Rob was selling information. Rudy may think you were a part of it. He may think you have information you’re willing to sell, too. And it probably piqued his interest to find you with Josh. Rudy might think he got lucky, that he wants to get to Josh, and that you’ll be useful to him.” Dan turned back to Josh. “What did you find out about this dinner party?”
“He has a suite at the Drayton, booked a small dining room Saturday night for a party of sixteen.”
“Sixteen? At the Drayton? He’s not going to try anything there,” Dan said.
Josh hesitated, his gaze narrowing dangerously on his boss. “No,” he said, the tone clipped, final.
“No?” Amanda asked. “No, what?”
“We have to know what he’s up to. How much he knows,” Dan insisted.
“No,” Josh said again.
“He knows where she lives. Do you think he’s going to leave her alone if she simply doesn’t show up at his dinner? You know better, Josh.”
“I know this isn’t a job for someone like her. It’s a job for an agent, and she’s not an agent.”
“It’s dinner,” Dan said. “We plant people in the hotel, get people on the wait staff. You’ll be beside her the whole time. She’ll be perfectly safe.”
Josh swore. “And if it turns into more than one dinner? What do we do with her then?”
“We deal with it at the time, if it happens.”
Josh was obviously furious. Amanda was stunned. They wanted her to go to Rudy Olivara’s dinner party?
“I really don’t think this is a good idea,” she said.
Dan ignored her and turned to Josh. “I don’t like the idea of him knowing where she lives, either. You want to take care of that? Or should I get someone else?”
Josh groaned. “I’ll handle it.”
“It would be better if you did. We don’t want to tip anybody off that anything out of the ordinary is going on.”
Josh was still seething. Dan looked like a man who wasn’t about to back down. Amanda was in a daze. She lost track of the conversation. Everyone got to their feet, and she did, too, realizing the meeting was over.
Dan looked at her, his face not quite as stern as usual, and said, “We’ll talk later, all right? Try not to worry. We’ll take good care of you.”
It wasn’t so long ago that she’d thought working at Division One was simply a grand adventure. The dangers inherent in what the agency actually did seemed far away. But one day, more than a year ago, three teams of agents—including Josh, Jamie, Dan and another friend of hers, Doc—were providing round-the-clock security for a mysterious government scientists’ lab when everything changed. Doc died that night. Dan nearly did, and Amanda had been horrified when she found out that her fiancé, Rob, and her then-boss, Martin Tanner, were behind the whole plot to get the scientist, Alex Hathaway, and his newest innovation, a high-level form of plastic explosives. They’d nearly gotten away with it. If not for Josh and Dan and Jamie and a few others, they would have.
And in the aftermath, Rob had died. Tanner was in prison and she was working for Dan, who was now running Division One.
Amanda found it hard to look at him, even now. More than a year after the shooting Rob helped arrange, he still walked with the aid of a black cane. She’d heard he probably always would, and she felt guilty every time she saw him, though he’d never given her any reason to think he blamed her for anything. And now he was trying to reassure her that he and the agency would protect her.
Amanda closed her eyes, the horror of the past year coming back yet again, her fears over what was happening now crowding in as well. It was dangerous here. She worked in a very dangerous place.
Josh took her by the arm, steering her into a small office and closing the door behind them. He led her to a love seat and pushed her down. He looked uncharacteristically somber as he sat down beside her, taking her hands in his.
“You’re trembling,” he said gently. “Cold?”
“No. Scared.”
That was all it took. She watched mutely as he came closer and closer, invading her senses, pushing nearly everything else—even a good bit of the fear—away. She found herself enfolded ever so gently in his arms.
She knew the way his skin smelled, knew all about the heat of his body, the strength. She knew his arms could be exquisitely gentle and so could his hands. She knew how it felt to be cradled against that impressive chest, to hear every little beat of his heart, feel his warm breath against her ear. And when her world seemed to be spinning out of control, she welcomed the familiarity and the reassurance of his arms.
Josh, she thought, amazed. How could she ever be reassured by being close to Josh?
Amanda groaned, and his arms tightened around her. He had the embrace down to an art form, she realized, unable to help but snuggle closer. He was wearing a blazer in the softest wool, an immaculate white shirt and the same spicy aftershave he always wore. He always seemed so clean, so carefully put together, so absolutely perfect.
“I’m sorry,” Josh said, his lips somewhere very near her right ear.
She shivered, from sheer pleasure this time, closed her eyes and gave herself up to the luxury of feeling momentarily safe and strangely content because she was in a man’s arms. Just for a minute she told herself, she could stay here, could take every bit of reassurance he was offering. Just for a minute. If it made her weak, made her seem like a silly, scared female, she didn’t really care. Josh already knew all those things about her. He’d seen her at her worst, and he probably didn’t think a thing about taking a woman in his arms.
What had he said to her the other night at the beach? It was just a kiss, Amanda. Do you have any idea how many women I’ve kissed?
Hundreds, at the very least, she decided. Thousands, perhaps. Of course, she had no business thinking about kissing him. He was just trying to make her feel better, and she had more important things to worry about.
Like dinner with Rudy.
“I don’t want to go to dinner,” she said, the words muffled by the fact that she was snuggled against Josh’s chest.
“I know.”
She felt the words rumbling out of his chest. He was a tall man and so very solid. There was a lot of him to hang on to and something so different about being in his arms, as if he’d somehow chased away the awful loneliness that had dogged her the past few months. But there was more. It left her yearning for more. Of just this, she thought. Being held.
He kissed women all the time, but did he hold them, as well? Just like this? Would he do this for her, if she asked? Just hold her? Could it be that simple? Josh, her friend? Holding her and reassuring her and chasing all the awful loneliness away?
He’d offered the other night, and she’d dismissed the idea without a second thought. But if friendship with Josh could be like this… Amanda buried her nose against the side of his neck, her skin against his, liking the sensation, liking everything about this. If she’d been a cat, she would have curled up in his lap and closed her eyes, purring while he lazily stroked her back.
Amanda laughed a bit, the image too ridiculous for words. She was losing it. Finally she’d cracked.
Josh pulled away slowly, carefully. “What’s so funny?”
“Nothing,” she insisted.
He wouldn’t let it go. He never let anything go. “One minute I’m holding you, and you’re so scared you’re shaking. The next minute you’re laughing? Tell me, Amanda. What did I do?”
“I was just thinking that you’re too good at this.”
“This?” he said, looking lost.
“At everything,” she complained. “Everything to do with women.”
He smiled then. “You liked it. You liked being in my arms.”
“You could c
harge by the hour, Josh. Women would be lined up around the block.”
He looked like the devil then. There was a twinkle in his eyes, a broad grin on his face. “You don’t have to pay,” he offered. “All you have to do is ask, and I’m yours. Whenever you need me.”
“I’d have to wait my turn,” she said.
Josh shook his head, undeterred. “There’s no line, Amanda. There are no other women in my life right now. There haven’t been for a while now.”
“Yeah, right. I’m sure you’ve been a regular Boy Scout.”
“I was a Boy Scout,” he insisted. “I can build a fire with the best of ’em, and I tie an amazing knot.”
He offered the latter with a positively wicked grin, showing a talent at turning any conversation at all to something sexual.
Fire? Knots? Amanda gaped at him, curiosity getting the better of her and overcoming any shyness or shock she might feel. She ended up blurting out, “You tie women up, don’t you?”
He laughed sinfully. “Only if they ask nicely.”
Her mouth fell open. It just hung there, no sound coming out, a fleeting image of Josh, a rope and a woman. A smiling woman. His women probably liked things like that.
Heat flooded her cheeks. She had never— She would never, not in a million years— But he just kept looking at her with those big, beautiful eyes of his, and he wasn’t laughing anymore. She watched his shoulders moving up and down with the effort it took him to breathe. The air in the room changed entirely, the atmosphere suddenly charged.
Something was going to happen. She could feel it. She wanted it, too. She wouldn’t have stopped it if she’d been given the chance.
Josh’s golden head was sinking down to hers. His mouth… She knew all about his mouth. It was gentle and wicked and warm. His lips were soft, persuasive, and he tasted the way he had the other day. Sweet and oh, so hot, the connection of his mouth and hers like a jolt of sheer energy she couldn’t begin to understand.
“You’re going to be the death of me yet,” he said, taking her mouth beneath his yet again.
She felt the shock of his tongue, drawing lazily along her bottom lip, stroking, teasing, a leisurely exploration that had her trembling.
“It’s all right,” he said, moving closer, deeper. “Just give me a minute.”
She’d give him hours. She was back in his arms, held more firmly than before, conscious now of the way her breasts were pressing against his chest, of the hard muscles of his thighs. She had her hands on his shoulders, felt steely strength there, determination as well. Amanda inched closer, her body coming to life, all kinds of achingly lonely places crying out for him.
He could fill her with heat and light, textures and sweet tastes. Sounds… She liked the little sounds he made, sounds of pure pleasure. She liked the way he seemed to be nibbling on her mouth, tasting, taking, always seeking more. His lips were firmly meshed with hers now, her mouth open beneath his, welcoming him, hardly able to get enough of him. His tongue brushed along her bottom lip, along her teeth, a slow, hot invasion of her space, her senses, and she liked it. She’d never been so totally blown away by a kiss, so lost in one. She didn’t even think to end it, didn’t want to. But he did. One minute he was devouring her and the next he was pulling away, holding her by her arms, keeping her firmly at arm’s length.
They looked at each other for a moment, her mouth slightly open, her bottom lip trembling. She could still taste him, still smell that fresh, clean, intoxicating smell that was uniquely him, and she couldn’t seem to move. She just blinked up at him, lost and dazed and dazzled by him.
As she always was when he touched her. The first time, she’d been absolutely shocked. That he’d done it. That she’d let him, at least for a moment. And that any single kiss could ever cause such havoc in a woman’s body. Afterward, she’d trembled every time she’d thought of it. She’d hated herself for it every bit as much as she despised him, thinking it hadn’t meant a damned thing to him and it had had her wondering if she was making a mistake with Rob. Because he’d never made her feel anything like that when he kissed her. And of course, she had been making a mistake with Rob. A huge one that had nothing to do with what she felt when she kissed him or Josh.
And the second time…the second time Josh kissed her at the coffee shop, she’d still been shocked. That it had felt so good. That he’d tasted so delicious. So wicked and so very sweet. So tempting. That nothing but the touch of his beautiful mouth could bring every nerve ending in her body to tingle.
And now, the third time…oh, it was every bit as good the third time, she realized with dismay. There was no denying it any longer, no escaping, it seemed. He could absolutely make the earth move with nothing but a kiss.
Josh didn’t seem to have any more idea what to say than she did. The moment stretched out awkwardly, and in that instant he didn’t look anything like the self-assured, utterly confident and in-control man she knew so well.
He didn’t look as if he was teasing her, either, or playing with her, which she found even more unsettling than his kiss. He didn’t look like a man who’d kissed thousands of women and forgotten them all.
He looked as though it meant something to him—kissing her. As though it had surprised him and pleased him and he wouldn’t forget it for a long time to come. Amanda never would. She knew that, just as she knew with utter certainty that she was foolish in thinking there was anything special to him about kissing her.
“Oh, God,” she groaned, stepping back and taking a much-needed breath. He was even more dangerous than she realized, his charm more lethal.
He had a gift, she decided, an ability to make every woman think she was something absolutely special. That it was different with her. He probably said that to women, she thought. It’s different with you. Special, with you.
Amanda jumped to her feet. He rose, too, and she had to look him in the eye. He seemed wary of her now and a bit reserved.
“Do you want me to apologize for that, too?”
“What would be the point? You’re not sorry.”
He sighed, still looking a little lost. “I don’t want to frighten you. Or make you uncomfortable.”
Her chin came up a notch. She was a grown woman. She shouldn’t be frightened by a kiss, and really that was all it had been. A kiss.
“I’m not scared,” she boasted.
“Good,” he said, some of that easy grace and charm coming back, the wicked grin. “Because the truth, Amanda, is that I have a hard time keeping my hands off you.”
“You have a hard time keeping your hands off any woman, Josh.”
“No, I don’t. Granted, I don’t try that often, because I like women. I like touching them. I like kissing them, and I never quite understood the point in denying myself the pleasure of a willing woman’s company.”
“Why would you deny yourself anything?”
He frowned. “You think there’s something wrong with enjoying life, Amanda.”
“I think you enjoy it enough for ten different men.”
“Maybe I do.” His mouth twitched with the effort not to smile as he suggested wickedly, “You think I’m easy. Is that what you’re saying?”
“I know you’re easy.”
“I’m also very, very good,” he boasted.
Flustered, wishing she’d never started this conversation in the first place, she headed for the door, “I’m sure you are, Josh. I’m just not interested.”
He blocked her path, practically purred her name. “Amanda?”
“What?” She flushed and kept her eyes averted. She was way out of her league sparring with him.
“You shouldn’t tell little white lies like that.”
“Really?”
He nodded. She sensed the movement more than saw it, and her good sense was telling her something else. It was telling her to get out, to get away from him, while she still could.
“Come on,” he whispered. “Look at me.”
She took a breath, squared her
shoulders and looked. He seemed bigger than life right then, taller, broader, even more blindingly gorgeous, almost god-like. Women worshipped him like one, falling at his feet, falling all over themselves for a kind word from him, a little smile, for the touch of his hands, and he was generous with all of those things. She knew. She’d seen him work a room before.
But it was just the two of them at the moment, his attentions focused entirely on her. He touched her again. His hand came up to the side of her face, his fingers spread wide, slipping into the ends of her hair, threading through it so he could wrap his fingers around the side of her head. His thumb brushed lightly across her cheek. She caught her breath as he stretched his thumb farther to the right, to her lips, tracing them with the pad of his thumb.
She wanted his mouth back, she realized, his lips, his tongue. She wanted him kissing her all over again, just like before. Because there was something intoxicating about the taste of him, the feel of him. Something addictive and highly potent and undeniably…right. It felt right to have him touch her.
No one had ever touched her like this. No one had ever made her feel like this.
Other men had kissed her, but they hadn’t left her tossing and turning restlessly in her bed, hadn’t invaded her dreams and left her waking up trembling and imagining she could still feel their hands on her body. They hadn’t created this strange, aching empty feeling to her body, this yearning, this awful need. She had dreamed about Josh, about this. She could swear that he knew it, too.
“Don’t play with me, Josh,” she begged.
“I’m not playing,” he said roughly. “It’s the truth. There are about a dozen different things I’d like to be doing with you right now. Believe me, it’s a miracle I’ve managed to keep my hands off you for this long.”
She stared up at him, unable to do anything else. He couldn’t possibly be serious. He couldn’t.
“Find someone else,” she said, desperate to end this, no matter what it took. “There are thousands of women in this city. One’s always been as good as another to you. Find someone else.”
Cinderella and the Spy Page 5
