Her spirits were a part of her and had assisted in her surviving that hellhole. I couldn’t even imagine Stryker not being there for me during all the hardships I’ve dealt with and still deal with today. Only time would determine whether her spirits had truly ascended or if they hid within Mako, so she could heal as Karen mentioned.
My mind remained silent for a few minutes, while the uncertainty of Rose and the other’s being alive sank in. If what I said really hurt Stryker, he was doing a bloody good job of not showing it, not an ounce of emotion came from his presence.
“Would you like a moment?” I realized after two weeks, I hadn’t allowed him a moment to be with Mako. Just because he loved Rose, didn’t mean he didn’t care about Makoto. I could feel the admiration he had for her. I simply assumed he hadn’t felt comfortable in showing his compassionate side yet. He’d only just revealed himself to Mako weeks ago during the locker room incident. I guessed he was going to pop up more after the exams were over.
“I won’t be long. Thanks, Ryder.”
I nodded in acknowledgment as I allowed my body to relax; my conscious drifted into the darkness as he took over. I didn’t want to linger and listen in. He deserved the same privacy he’d given me these last couple of weeks.
~STRYKER~
I allowed my eyes to open, their gaze landed on the sleeping beauty before me. My chest ached in irony as I tightened my hand around hers; the warmth of her grasp helped to level my raging anger. She didn’t deserve this. None of her spirits deserved watching their host go through such agony all these cycles. Even the discovery of her split personality, Midnight.
I couldn’t harbor words to describe how sorrowful I was for her existence. Ryder hadn’t shared much detail regarding her summoning, due to the exam being the following day, but from the little information I gathered, it was clear Midnight had been forced into creation. To be brought into this universe as a host’s coping mechanism, before being forced to fight in order to survive each summoning was cruel. No one deserved that, regardless of spirit, host or split personality.
I pulled her hand to my lips and pressed them against the back of her hand firmly. I had to give Eli credit for taking care of our princess. Even now, she still smelled like vanilla; the scent soothed me.
“Roseline...my beautiful Rose. Why have you left me alone? This isn’t like you. You’re too bloody stubborn to give up and abandon me. Won’t you come back? You promised we’d catch up. Please...don’t hurt this broken soul. I love you.”
I couldn’t recognize my own voice, the low, barely audible sound held so much heart break. Was this how it felt? Did I truly feel heartbroken?
Rose didn’t leave me; she didn’t break up with me. She was just sleeping...yes, just taking a long, relaxing rest after using so much energy to protect her host.
The others were also copying her lead. She’d probably forced them to rest up after such a tedious battle. I didn’t care if I stayed in denial. I would never accept that they were gone – that she was gone. I knew how strong they were. They wouldn’t leave Mako behind.
Rose would never leave me willingly. I wish I could show her how much I love her...how much I’ve missed our nightly star gazing picnics or the sound of her voice as she explained how adorable Mako was, usually getting side tracked throughout the story. It was a pain at times, but I enjoyed listening to her stories and thoughts. I missed her voice, her laugh, her smile...I missed my Rose.
“Come back to me,” I whispered, allowing my mind to fade into the darkness.
“Roseline... my beautiful Rose. Why have you left me alone? This isn’t like you. You’re too bloody stubborn to give up and abandon me. Won’t you come back? You promised we’d catch up. Please...don’t hurt this broken soul. I love you.”
I felt sorry for this person.
His voice barely had any emotion, yet he sounded sad…depressed like me.
~RYDER~
I opened my eyes, allowing my vision to blur as the dizziness took over. Switching with my spirit was never easy. I bet the others felt the same. I don’t possibly know how King Aspen was able to make a serum to fight off the weakness between shifts, but I sometimes wished we’d have something to help with nausea and dizziness that came with such switching.
I could sense Eli coming back; her aura triggered my senses of her approaching arrival. I took one more glance at my Princess.
“Makoto keep fighting. We’re right here. Just keep swimming.”
I took one last deep breath to compose myself, bringing back my usual self. I didn’t know who would be entering during the night, but I’d rather keep my usual facade going. I could only let my guard down back at Knightwood. At least no one could enter our territory without our permission. Just keep swimming, our Starlight Firefly.
“Makoto keep fighting. We’re right here. Just keep swimming.”
This voice sounded familiar; the pain reflected in each word stung my essence.
If I had a heart, I bet it would bleed from such heartache.
I should keep swimming...I knew that meant something.
Did the voice want me to keep fighting?
Just keep swimming...maybe...I will.
~ELIASEANNE~
I watched the fireflies as they danced to the tunes of the night always soothed my soul. I knew as a fairy spirit, nature was our element of choice, but I still felt Mother Starlight always wanted me to be aware that she’d comfort me when I needed it the most. Today was no different.
I sat comfortably in a tall oak tree, multiple vines beneath me. Their soft texture made me feel relaxed as I leaned back into their secured hold. The numerous wildlife always came by to say hello; from the chipmunks to owls, they always took a few minutes to sit with me, doing their share in comforting me.
I closed my eyes as I allowed my head to fall back against the bark. Elias was knocked out, unable to stay conscious for very long. This poison was seriously getting on my nerves.
Elias hated staying in bed all day, especially in that sterile, saline smelling environment. I supported his dislikes, but I agreed with the others, he needed to rest. I hated seeing him so weak. It simply triggered unwanted memories and feelings.
Every time I closed my eyes, I could see us strapped against that medical table. The razor-sharp blade and other medical equipment lay neatly on the sterile sheet. It didn’t matter how hard we tried to escape the metal shackles that bound us – we were trapped.
That woman with the red hair, walking in with a maleficent smile on her face, before she pulled up her medical mask; her gloved hands ready to begin the series of painful experiments that followed. I could feel everything that Elias felt, even when he tried to nudge me out of his mind – to push me away so I wouldn’t experience the torture that went on for hours.
Before I allowed my mind to wander into my dark past, Nightmare jumped into my lap; her triple white tails waved wildly.
“MEW MEW MEW MEW!” She jumped in place eagerly, causing me to raise an eyebrow at her sudden excitement.
“What does the Goddess of Destruction need from moi?” I questioned softly, nodding my head slightly to the god before me. I knew the boys didn’t believe Mako’s speculations. I didn’t blame them; they couldn’t see the same vision I saw. Even Elias, being my host, didn’t see the outpouring of power that flowed through her little body: the massive shimmers of black and pink floated around her like a barrier protecting its treasure.
She turned around, running down my long legs, visible due to the white shorts I wore. She hopped onto the branch opposite of me before her body began to shimmer.
I smoothly rose to my feet, the vines that once cushioned my sitting area morphing below. They intertwined with each other, creating a small platform for me to stand upon. I silently thanked them; they knew I would have to kneel shortly.
The shimmering light dimmed, revealing a tall, curvy figure before me. A wave of power hit me, causing me to waver. I had to take a couple of breaths as I allowed my body to
adapt to the suffocating flow of power surrounding me. I knelt on one knee; my left hand rose to my chest as I bowed my head in obedience.
“It’s an honour, Goddess of Destruction and daughter of Deathpre. I can only thank the stars above for allowing me to witness your gracefulness. I’m beyond blessed.” I allowed my emotion of gratitude and praise to flow through my high-pitched voice; my mind still wrapped around the fact that I was now in the presence of a Starlight God: my creator.
If I had to use words to describe how utterly beautiful she was, I’d have to create a whole new dictionary. No earthly words could label how pure, majestic and powerful Nightmare was.
She was six-five; her strawberry pink curls flowed gloriously around her, floating lightly as if the winds were constantly lifting the pink strands in place. Her complexion was pale, similar to Mako’s; her rosy pink cheeks stood out as did her baby pink lips.
Her curvy body was covered in a sparkling black dress that flowed elegantly down her frame and draped behind her in perfection. I noticed the smaller size scythe relaxing against her back, the scythe similar to Mako’s modification weapon she had used during her exam – the same black chain with the dangling metal shaped rose, wrapped around her arms as she held the medium size scythe securely. The most stunning aspect of the goddess before me was her enchanting eyes.
“Rise Elyion, fairy spirit of Elias Kingsley. I’m pleased with your respect for me in all forms. For this conversation, feel free to relax and speak to me as normal,” she ordered; a smile formed on those smooth cupid-bow lips.
I had assumed from her familiar appearance; her mismatched eyes would stay as turquoise blue and grey. Now that I was getting a glimpse, her turquoise eye remained, but her once grey eye was a bright pink. I could see a small, magic circle within her iris, rotating around as her magic flowed through it. Those mismatched orbs held immense power that could move mountains with a simple thought.
I rose to my feet; my hands fell to my sides as I gulped.
Wouldn’t it be rude to talk so casually to a god? Ugh, where’s smarty pants Elias when I need him?
She chuckled; the melodic sound flowed through the wind as the trees shivered in happiness; the wind breezed by us as the forest praised the sound of a god. I couldn’t help myself from shivering as my heart melted in happiness. Who knew such a sound could melt away your troubles and fears.
“Elias needs to rest. He should not let such past doings prevent him from prospering. You can’t face the unknown without being prepared. That starts with your body, the vessel of power and might,” she acknowledged.
“Thank you, my Creator. I will inform him of your message once he awakens.” I thanked her, bowing deeply. I forgot she was a god, she could obviously hear my thoughts.
“Elyion...I’m proud you’ve adapted well. I’m unable to interfere with the stars above, but realize myself, Aphroditeee, Yuikimiru, and Jehovah knows of Edmund’s wrongdoings against you and Elias. We’ve heard your prayers. I just want you to know, judgment works in mysterious ways, but will always be served in the name of righteousness.”
My hands clenched into a fist, fighting the tears that threatened to escape my eyes as I swallowed hard, praying I wouldn’t break down from her declaration.
They listened...they heard my pleas...I’d one day get justice for my current situation. I wasn’t wrong.
“Elyion, never question your birth. The stars created you as you were. Jehovah himself is not pleased with your predicament, but you have great purpose in this life, regardless of gender. We listen and such tampering with our absolute law is unforgiving. The stars will reveal their plans when the time is right. Trust me when I say this, I will personally deliver justice on your behalf. Mark my words, Elyion. As a child of Yuikimiru, Goddess of Life, she sends her gratitude and vows to participate in the judgment that will occur very soon. Continue being patient and devoted to the duty that lies before you. Let us ease your burdens and fight such battles in the stars above,” she concluded.
The simple thought of being approved by a god for the feelings developing within me only made me cry harder.
With her last words I nodded, the tears rolled down my cheeks as a sob escaped me. If the gods accepted me...this version of me, would Mako accept me, one day?
“Makoto...is my beloved child. You should have more hope in her, Elyion. She is special in many aspects and views the vast world surrounding us differently than the average shifter or human. Her mind is like a fresh new page, the pen of life readying itself to write multiple tales. She is very open-minded – her ability to accept many aspects of life due to her vast levels of curiosity is one unique aspect of hers. Do not crucify such hopes and dreams over such primitive morals. Love has no bounds amongst shifters. Allow the stars to guide your heart, just as you allow them to guide you on your path to Starlight,” she advised.
I nodded as I continued to cry.
I never dreamed of this moment, to be graced by a god’s presence, and my internal struggles being recognized. They accepted the fact I was female even though they had created me as a male, and now, I was promised justice to the man who put me in such circumstances. I was beyond blessed.
I felt something brush against my cheek, before flowing down to my chin, lifting my head up to face those powerful mismatched eyes up close. I froze in place as my body broke out in shivers, unable to grasp the moment unfolding before me; a Starlight god lifted my head; her body inches away from mine.
“Elyion...or should I say EliaseAnne. I need your assistance. My sweet princess needs a little help in conquering the darkness she faces within herself. Can I ask for your help...for Makoto’s sake?” she requested.
I could see the sadness in her eyes, such sadness you would see in a mother who feared for her child’s well-being. “Anything, especially for Makoto.” I stated firmly, hoping my eyes showed my determination as the last set of tears rolled down my cheeks.
“Thank you, our child. This is what I request from you.”
“EliaseAnne, are you sure this will work? I don’t see how you singing to her is going to do anything,” Ryder stressed, leaning against the wall next to the window.
It was now close to twelve in the morning and I was sitting next to Mako, her hand in mine as I explained to Ryder what Nightmare had asked me to do.
“It will do something. I just know it. I’ll do anything to see her smile again Ryder. I want my best friend back…I miss her,” I confessed, ignoring the lump in my throat. He sighed, walking towards me. He placed his hand on my shoulder.
“Me too, Eli. I miss her, too. If you think that singing this song will work…I know that song was one of her favourites when she was younger. Maybe it will trigger something. Singing doesn’t hurt anyone, go ahead,” he concluded, smiling softly at me.
I returned his smile with my own, before turning to face the sleeping girl before me. If this could help her fight whatever internal battle she faced, I would sing all night long.
I calmed my frantic heart as I took a few deep breaths, allowing my fairy magic to flow through me. I only needed a small amount to flow through my voice. I prayed to Starlight it would be enough to clear Mako’s path within the darkness – enough to bring her back to me...to all of us. She belonged here with us, not in the shadows of death.
“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray. You’ll never know dear; how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away.”
I allowed the magic to flow freely with the words, my intentions clear as the sun’s purpose to light the sky during the day. I would be Mako’s light in the darkness; I would bring her home.
“EliaseAnne, are you sure this will work? I don’t see how you singing to her is going to do anything.”
“It will do something. I just know it. I’ll do anything to see her smile again Ryder. I want my best friend back…I miss her.”
Ryder. Eli? They sound so caring; I wish they could hear me, too. I miss you, too. Wou
ld you rid the loneliness that plagues my shattered soul? I want to go home.
“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray. You’ll never know dear; how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away.”
A soft voice sang.
That song.
I remembered it from somewhere; the voice is different though.
The sunshine will guide you home.
Do I search for the light?
I have to fight for the light. I was tired of the darkness.
I wanted my friends and spirits back.
I wanted to feel Midnight’s presence again.
I wanted to live again.
I needed to retrieve my identity.
I would fight and conquer.
I pushed against the confusion that invaded my mind, pushing through the thick fogginess.
It was a fight for what I wanted.
I wanted to be free of this darkness.
I knew what it meant to achieve freedom.
I craved for it yet again.
I would reach the light and emerge victorious.
I could see a speck of light.
I could feel my body forming, arms reached out towards the light, as if the thick, black sludge that held me captive melted away, chunk by chunk, I struggled to succeed.
I felt the last chunk of sludge melt away, releasing me from my internal solitude.
I wasted no time, sprinting towards the light.
Ryder, Daniel, Elias, Marcus, EliaseAnne, my spirits and Midnight!
I’m coming!
Wait for me.
I’m finally free.
Chapter Four
Tainted Rose Page 5
