by Amy Brent
It took me a lot longer than I thought to regale her, with an especially large chunk dedicated to describing James’ hotel room. She didn’t seem nearly as impressed by it as I was, but I couldn’t help but feel it was because that suite was where I had made several life altering decisions that had completely changed everything.
I also left out how catty my coworkers often were to me and how lonely I had felt before James showed up, and how lonely I was afraid I would be once the newness of my situation wore off and I was all alone again. No one liked a mood killer, right?
By the time I was done, I felt like I had gone through the whole situation all over again, just at super speed. I was exhausted, my emotions were pretty raw, and I was feeling particularly vulnerable.
“Oh Nikki,” my mother murmured after a few seconds to digest everything that I had said. “I’m so sorry. I should have been there for you. Maybe if I had, none of this would have happened.”
None of this would have happened? I looked down at my rounded belly, which seemed like it had grown exponentially since I had a decent place to stay and so much less stress. There was no doubt that my life would certainly be so much easier without the precious life brewing inside of me, but now that I had my own, personal connection with whatever was growing there, I didn’t know if I could ever give that up.
I had chosen to bring this child into the world for reasons I still didn’t entirely understand. But I knew that my heart and soul was so wrapped up in the future I had planned for the two of us that even wishing to go back seemed like blasphemy.
“I don’t know, Mom. Maybe things were meant to be this way.”
“Maybe,” she said, squeezing my hand. “But I know for a fact that you weren’t meant to go it on your own. Look, I’m only a couple of hours drive from here and now that I’m collecting disability for my hip, I can come see you whenever you need. I respect that you’re independent and need your space so you won’t be asking for sleepovers every weekend, but when you need me, you call me, alright?”
The relief that flooded through me at that was uncanny. And for the first time in a long time, I was incredibly grateful for her presence.
“I will Mom, I promise.”
“Good, good.” She hugged me again and it was probably the most physical contact that we had had in years. “Now, how about I cook you some dinner? I brought the supplies for my famous lasagna in the trunk.”
“Lasanga?” I asked, perking up. “You know I would never turn that down!”
“I thought as much. You wait here, I’ll be right back.”
I watched her go, both of us smiling even if we were probably both feeling a little unsure about the future. I was just so glad that James had convinced me to call her. The world was a big place, after all, sometimes it wasn’t a good thing to be so untethered.
Chapter Twenty-Two
~Nicole~
“So, tell me more about this James fellow, the rich man? Is he nice? Do you know anything about his personality?”
“Oh Mom, I don’t know if I wanna have this conversation.”
“Why not?”
“I dunno. It’s personal. And I don’t even know if he’ll really be in my life much, so I don’t want you romanticizing the idea of him.”
That was my job.
“Honey, you said he helped you find this apartment, set you up with health insurance. I’m pretty sure he intends to be in your life at least a little bit.”
“I… I guess you’re right.”
“I am every now and then, so go on. Tell me about this mysterious benefactor.”
“Well, he’s tall. Like over six foot. And handsome, but that somewhat seems to go hand in hand with being young and rich.”
“So, he’s young then?”
“Yes, Mom, this isn’t a robbing the cradle situation.”
“Hah, but I do think a cradle is definitely involved in your relationship.”
“You got me there,” I laughed lightly, emphasis on the lightly. “But yeah he’s somewhere in his thirties.”
“Thirties? So that’s quite a bit older than you.”
“I mean, yeah, but it’s not old.”
“Fair enough. So, he’s tall and rich and older but not old. What else?”
“He’s got a really low voice. Like almost off the register, and he has some of the most intense eyes I’ve ever seen. It’s almost like a predator, but not quite as scary. Well, maybe sometimes he’s scary. But in a good way.”
“In a good way?”
I nodded. “Yeah, the kind that gets your blood pumping and puts you a little bit on edge, like you’re really alive for the first time in a while.”
“Oh. I know what you mean. People like that can be pretty dangerous, Nikki. I remember how electric I felt when I first met your father, and we both know how that turned out.”
“Boy, don’t I. But I don’t think he’s like that. If anything, James is the anti-thesis. He’s always so effortlessly cool, it’s almost uncanny. Hardly anything seems to ruffle him, and he’s just adapts to every situation like it’s nothing. If I was in his situation, I probably would not have reacted at all like he did.
“And he’s so generous. I mean, I know he’s loading so it’s not a big deal to him to drop a thousand dollars, but he just thinks of everything and never hesitates to buy something if he thinks it will help the child. He’s smart too, which makes me think I’m going to have a snarky little rug rat no matter who they take after.”
“Wow, with all those compliments, I would almost think you had feelings for him.”
I stopped short at that, eyes going wide and my heart skipping a beat. Of course, Mom didn’t miss that for a second and gave me a curious look.
“Do you have feelings for him?”
I looked at her blankly for several moments, but a whirlwind was going on inside my mind. Of course, I didn’t have feelings for him! That would be stupid. And while I was a lot of things, I was not stupid.
…most of the time.
But then again, I felt a strange attachment to him that I had never felt before. How could I be so invested considering I hardly knew him? I have never much of one for spontaneous human bonding, so maybe it was because I had his child inside of me?
“I don’t think so,” I murmured finally before stuffing a very large bite of lasagna into my mouth.
“You don’t think so? That means you don’t know so?”
“That is how English works, last I checked.”
“Alright. Well keep an eye on that. Maybe it would make things easier if you did.”
“Or maybe it wouldn’t,” I countered.
But Mom shrugged but I could already see the fantasy building inside of her head. For someone who had been in a loveless marriage for years, she certainly was a hopeless romantic.
Thankfully, she let it drop and the rest of the meal we stuck to safer topics, like what I could expect from my pregnancy and scheduling future doctor appointments.
Too soon night was falling, and it was time for Mom to go. Although she didn’t have to work anymore, she did have one shift a week at her local grocery to get her out of the house and give her fun money. She offered to call in, but I didn’t see a reason for her to miss one of her work shifts when I could see her at pretty much any weekend.
“Alright, well I suppose I better pack up and go,” she said, sighing as she looked to her wristwatch.
“Yeah, especially of you want to get a good night’s rest.” I stood, my belly sufficiently full, and went to the kitchen. “I can wash you dishes really fast if you want them to be clean for the ride home.”
“Oh, don’t worry about that, dear. Just keep it until next time. You can certainly use the left overs. I imagine you’re pretty much always busy with the baby and your job.”
“You’re not wrong there. Thank you, Mom, again. I really mean it.”
“Of course, it’s the least I could do.”
“Well, can I walk you to your car?”
“Oh no, darlin
g, that’s okay. That’s far too long of a walk for you to go out of your way.”
“Are… are you sure? I don’t mind, really.”
“Yes, I’m sure. Let me just grab my purse and I’ll head out.”
We made it to the door and hugged again. We held it for quite a while before I went to open it for her.
“You know, everything has pretty much blown over back in town, if you ever want to visit.”
“Really?” I said with a laugh. “And why don’t I believe that?”
“I’m serious,” she objected, her eyebrows nearly going to her hairline. “Almost everyone’s forgotten about it and moved on.”
“Well I haven’t,” I said flatly. “Let’s not ruin this great night by talking about those backwards-backwater-backstabbing gossipers.”
“Right, of course. I’m sorry. But if this ever gets too much for you, know that you’re always welcome back into my home.”
“Thanks, Mom. I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Please do.”
She stood on tiptoes to give me a little peck on the cheek then headed out, walking down my hall slowly, as if she didn’t want to leave either. But we were both adults with lives and responsibilities and a whole lot of emotions to sort out.
I waited until she was all the way in the elevator before slowly closing my door and slumping against it.
Wow, that had gone so much better than I thought it could. Maybe this was the turning point, where my life went from mostly hardship to mostly awesome. Was that a thing that could happen? Had I gotten all my hard knocks in when I was younger and now I was getting the free passes that my karma had built up?
I hoped so. It would certainly make having my baby a whole lot easier.
Crossing my fingers for good luck, I locked the door and headed for the shower. I had one more day to the weekend before it was back to the old grindstone, so I figured I might as well relax as much as I could.
Goodness know, as my belly grew bigger, that comfortableness would be hard to come by.
Chapter Twenty-Three
~James~
“I’ll see the rest of you next week where I was your next-quarter proposal in.”
There was a chorus of agreement all around, and my workers started filing out, ready for a new day. We were about a month away from the new quarter and I really wanted to kick it out of the park and have another stellar year.
Plus, being busy with work got my mind off of Nicole, and I needed that as much as possible right now.
It had been a bit over a week since I had left, and she was on my mind far more than she should have been. I didn’t like that my mind was so fixated on her and kept chasing itself in circles, never thinking of anything new and always asking the same questions over and over and over again.
So, I threw myself into work, staying late at the office every day and going in early. It was working pretty well, but all that came crashing down when I checked my phone to see that Nicole had messaged me.
I went straight to my office and closed the door before quickly dialing her back. A quick look to her clock showed that it was almost her lunch time, from what I remembered her telling me, so hopefully she would be able to pick up.
The phone rang twice before she finally picked up. “Oh, hi James. I didn’t expect you to get back to me so soon.”
“I just wrapped up a meeting.” Already, I was trying to decipher her tone. She didn’t seem too alarmed, so it couldn’t be an emergency… right? “Is something wrong?”
“Oh no! Not at all. I was going to text you, but we had a bunch of calls come in.” She hesitated for a slight moment and I could pick up on the uncertainty in her voice. “Um, would you like to…I, uh…” She paused, as if collecting herself, but I found it amusing how flustered she was. “I have a prenatal appointment with that doctor you set me up with and I was wondering if you would like to come, and maybe work on our divorce stuff as well?”
“Wow, you managed to get an appointment already? It’s only been a week.”
“Yeah, when they heard that I hadn’t been to any sort of doctor since my first check up they insisted I come in ASAP. If you’re busy, that’s fine, but I figured since this is kind of a milestone thing that it might be something you’d want to be there for. Plus, we can test for paternity.”
“Yeah, of course. What time?”
She told me, and I jotted it down to program into my phone later. It was late enough to where I could take a flight out in the morning and get there without rushing, but early enough that I could also get home for by midnight or so. As much as I was tempted to get a hotel again and stay the night, I really was needed at work. And while I could take as much time off as I wanted because, well, I was the boss, that didn’t mean I should.
“Anyways, safe travels and all that. See you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow,” I said, waiting for her to hang up.
Once that was over, I quickly buzzed my secretary, asking her to secure my flight. If she was curious as to why I was rushing to St. Louis again, she didn’t say, and I appreciated that. She really was a great secretary. I needed to check what vacation she wanted to go on since she didn’t come to Vegas.
I went about getting everything all settled and then sat back, thinking hard about how I had reacted and what I could expect. But no matter how much thinking I did, I couldn’t deny the fact that I was downright excited. For a doctor’s appointment.
What the hell was wrong with me?
***
It took a little longer than I would like to rent a car and get to Nicole’s, which meant we didn’t have enough time to go out to eat beforehand. That was probably a good thing considering that she was going to probably have to get blood tests and all that done, but I was a bit miffed.
Nevertheless, I texted her that I was almost there when I was at a stoplight and tried to pull my mood back to neutral. Normally that wasn’t a struggle for me, but nothing was normal with Nicole. She inverted my world and turned it upside down, but I didn’t know what I was supposed to do about that.
As I pulled up to the front door, she was standing there in the entryway, absolutely glowing. I could tell from all the way where I was that there was a rosy hue to her cheeks and her stomach was a good bit larger.
Living in a real place and not her car was doing wonders for her obviously, and I couldn’t help but feel a bit proud. Already I had made a notable improvement on her life, and it hadn’t even been a month yet.
She waved as she saw me, walking quickly towards the car. I noticed that there was a distinct sort of waddle developing in her gait, and I knew it wouldn’t be long before she was in full on pregnancy walk.
For some reason I wanted to see that quite badly. Something about the idea of seeing her full bellied and slowed down made me a bit hotter under the collar than I thought it would.
“Hey there,” she said, hopping in. Although her tone was laid back and her body language was relaxed, I couldn’t help but feel electricity crackle between us. “Thanks for the ride.”
“No problem. You mind putting the address into the GPS?”
“Not at all. I saved it to my phone.”
She leaned forward and typed it in, her smile never leaving her face. God, she was so beautiful. What give her the right to just come in my life and disrupt everything?
I didn’t know, and I didn’t get the answer as we drove along. Instead, she told me about how work had been and how grateful she was for her place and asked me how my life was going.
I gave her some generic answers, a bit distracted by driving, and wondering how the appointment was going to be. I had been so busy with work that I hadn’t bothered to learn more about the normal pregnancy schedule. I really should have done that. It was the least I could do for my child considering that Nicole was renting out her body to them for nine to ten months.
“So, what’s on the schedule for this appointment?” I asked, trying to sound like I was just clarifying rather than totally cl
ueless.
“Oh, you know, the usual for the beginning of the second trimester.”
“…which would be?”
She raised her eyebrow but thankfully kept explaining. “Recording my weight, checking my blood pressure and maybe a pee-test. Poking and prodding my belly, discussing my pregnancy plan. The paternity test, of course. Probably a blood test, and then -of course- hearing the baby’s heartbeat.”
“What?” I said, almost accidentally slamming on the break right then and there. “We’re going to hear the heartrate?”
“Yeah, of course. That’s the big thing with second trimesters. Your baby actually starts to seem human. Why?”
“I guess I just hadn’t thought about it.”
I knew that was particularly silly of me, of course we would listen to the heartbeat, but I couldn’t help my surprise. I had just found out about the baby and now I was going to hear scientific proof of its existence. That was… important. I knew at least that much.
“I understand. Running that big business of yours, I doubt you have a lot of time to worry about what’s happening at my numerous checkups.”
She had a point, but that didn’t make me feel less guilty. Fortunately, she changed the subject and soon we were discussing her work again.
