“Dex,” she said, feeling a slight stir of discomfort in her stomach, “do you—”
“Would you hand me my cell?” he said, talking over her. “It’s plugged in over there.”
“Um, sure. You weren’t talking on it, were you?” she said, trying to make a joke. “You know that’s not allowed.”
“I was—sorry. It was important.”
“I’m kidding. You’re allowed to do anything here.” She was about to add “it’s your home, too,” but didn’t. He had a lot of responsibilities, especially if his computer program took off. Dex’s being busy was something she’d have to get used to.
“Want coffee and eggs? We’re out of apples.” She smiled, but he didn’t look up.
“I don’t have time. Speaking of, if you need to use my car, better make it soon. I changed my flight to a few hours earlier.”
That knot of discomfort in her stomach tightened. “Thought you hadn’t booked your return flight yet.”
“I took care of it this morning. You knew I was leaving today.”
“Yes, but…” She trailed off when his phone in her hand vibrated. “You’re getting a call.”
Finally, he looked interested. “From who?”
“Angela.”
“Oh.” He shrugged. “Let it go to voicemail.”
The face of his cell went black, then lit up. “You have six missed calls from her. Six voicemails, too.”
“Yeah, I’m sure.”
His short answers made discomfort turn to full-on unease, with maybe a tiny bit of distrust. “Is she a friend?”
“I guess you’d call her that.”
“From Manhattan?”
After a good five seconds, he nodded.
Who was this maybe-friend of his from Manhattan calling six times?
Of course the answer was so obvious, it shouldn’t have hit her over the head with such force. Angela was one of those women. One of those hundreds whom Dexter had spent a night with, then disappeared.
The swirling swell of emotions inside her twisted and wrung tight.
“You going to see her again?”
“Really wish I didn’t have to.”
Jules closed her eyes. Well, she couldn’t expect his past life to just evaporate. She was falling for a man who had baggage and flaws. She’d known that all along.
“Are you okay?”
When she opened her eyes, Dexter’s were on her. It wasn’t the same expression of compassion he’d worn when she’d hurt her foot, but at least something was there, and at least he wasn’t still typing on that wretched computer.
“I’m surprised, that’s all.”
“About…?”
She took in a deep breath, held it in her lungs, then blew it out. “I thought… I thought you were staying.”
“Why?”
Enough of this. It was time for a leap of faith—a big one. And if he wouldn’t take it, she’d take it for the both of them. “Because you should. Because I want you to stay.”
“Why?” he repeated.
Was the man dense? “For us. Aren’t we an us?”
“I suppose, in a way.”
“Dexter,” she snapped. “Why are you being like this? And don’t you dare say, Like what?”
He sighed and walked over, but it was as if he wasn’t really seeing her. “I can’t do this now. There’s no time. I have to get back.”
“And you’ll get together with Angela, too?”
Dexter took a beat before tilting his head. “I already told you I was.”
“Huh. Guess that shouldn’t surprise me.” Jules was shocked at how much sarcasm was in her snort of reply.
“What shouldn’t?”
“How eager you are to get to New York—back to her and your old life.”
He put his hands on his hips. “Are you accusing me of something specific or speaking in generalities?”
“Oh!” she growled at the ceiling. “I hate when you talk like this. You’re a robot.”
Dexter opened his mouth, but didn’t speak at first. “I have no clue why you’re behaving so irrationally, but I told you two seconds ago that I don’t have time.” Irritation and impatience wrapped around every word, but Jules didn’t care.
“Time for what? You missed your conference call.” She bit her lip and waited. When she got nothing but his blank robot stare, she went on. “Yesterday, you said if you missed it, you might as well cancel Friday’s meeting with the investors. So I thought…”
“You thought…” He lifted his eyebrows. “You thought I was going to call it off. Abandon everything? Then, what? Move to Hershey? Work for my father again? Now that’s playacting, Jules. Just like how we started this whole thing.”
Despite how she knew she’d started it—caused his annoyed and stressed-out attitude—each of his words was an arrow to her heart.
“I’d never cancel the meeting with Three Jacker Media,” he continued. “They don’t reschedule.” He shook his head, and for a flash of a moment, he looked regretful. “I thought this might happen, I worried… You and I—we hardly know each other. We’re talking about my work, my number one priority. If you don’t get that—”
“I get it,” she snapped, taking on another arrow. Because what he was actually saying was work was more important than her—than them. She would never be his first priority.
“Believe me.” She crossed her arms, anger leaping to the front of her emotional queue. “You’ve made your feelings crystal clear.”
“Good.”
“Stop it!” She stomped her foot, furious now—at him, at herself. “Why are you being such a giant ass?”
“I didn’t realize I was. But if I am, it’s because you say you understand why this is important to me, when you obviously don’t. You’re forcing my hand.”
“So let’s talk about it. No, sorry, I forgot you don’t have time for that, and I don’t want to right now, either. I want you out of here, and I want this shirt off of me.” She tried to yank his stupid, smelly tee over her head, but her arm caught in the sleeve and her hair got tangled.
“Juliet? Dex?”
She froze, then quickly pulled the shirt back in place over her body. When she could see again, Eileen, Braxton, Luke, and Roxy stood at the front door.
Of course we have an audience.
“We heard loud voices,” Eileen said.
Roxy grinned. “Were you about to—”
“No!” Jules and Dexter said together.
“He was just leaving,” Jules said, pointing at Dexter. “Wouldn’t want to miss your flight.”
If he spent another hour in her presence in this mood, she’s show him how irrationally she could behave. This trip to New York was perfect timing. It’d give them both a moment to cool off. She’d miss him, but even though she cared about him more than anyone, wanted him more than anyone, she obviously still had full possession of her independence.
If she hadn’t been so heated, the thought would’ve made her ecstatic.
Dexter was pacing the room, the troubled look on his face making her irritation take a backseat. He stopped walking, looked at her with a furrowed brow, rubbed his chin, then dropped his arms to his side. “It’s over.”
“Over?” Eileen asked. “What is?”
“Our marriage,” he said, not looking at Jules. “The relationship. Everything.”
The words didn’t make sense to her brain, but when her heart took on a dozen more arrows—poisoned-tipped this time—Jules slowly realized the truth…
Instigated by Dexter, unknowingly fueled by Jules, they were having that public breakup they’d planned. Their exit strategy. But she wasn’t prepared for it—a breakup wasn’t part of the new plan.
To her, this wasn’t playacting.
“We’re getting divorced,” he added in a tone so matter-of-fact that she had no grounds to argue. They’d never talked about a real future together. Not really.
“Dex,” his mom said. “Don’t make impulsive decisions in the hea
t of the moment.”
“I’m not. There’s a lot more to this than anyone knows. Reasons no one else knows. Jules is in total agreement. This isn’t one-sided.”
“He’s right,” she said, keeping up her part of the act, while feeling tacks in her throat and an almost unbearable sadness. With the anger gone, overwhelming misery hung over her. This was really happening.
“What reasons?” Roxy asked.
Jules didn’t know how to reply, but Dexter did—like a true pro, his part was preplanned.
“Forgot to give you this,” he said in a quiet voice, still not meeting Jules’s eyes as he handed her a small piece of paper. “You’ve earned every penny. And I should know.”
…
Dexter felt like absolute shit saying that, but it was necessary. When he realized he had to end the limbo and confusion, the best he could do was end the whole damn thing by giving Jules her share of the money that he’d been carrying around for days.
The check was the final termination of their business deal.
He might as well have said “for services rendered.” That couldn’t have finished things more completely. It hadn’t been his initial intention, but ultimately, there seemed no other way.
Not even Jules would want to stay married to someone like him.
Still…the look in her eyes—anger, sadness, devastating disappointment. He’d gone too far when the color had drained from her face. The window glass was still rattling from when she’d slammed the bedroom door. Locking herself inside.
He hated himself, and might for a long time, but he needed out. Work came first—it always had. He thought Jules understood that, but it was evident she didn’t, which forced him to make a clear-cut decision. Yes, it was made in the heat of the moment, but once he put serious distance between them, Dexter knew he’d feel less guilt.
This was his fault, because he’d slipped up when he’d started to believe the lies, believe his feelings could be real.
“You can’t split up,” Roxy said, the family still standing at the open front door. “You’re prefect together.”
“Quiet,” Luke snapped, glaring at her. “It’s none of our business. Dex, I’m so sorry.” He walked over to him and put a hand on his shoulder. It was probably supposed to make him feel better, but Dexter was so pissed at himself that he wanted to knock it away. “Do you need anything?”
He shook his head and stared at the floor. “Ride to the airport. I think I should leave the car.”
“That’s the least you can do for your wife,” Roxy snarled, sounding so much like Jules that Dexter had to lock his jaw, shut off all feelings.
“My Jeep’s out front,” Luke said. “Now?”
Dexter exhaled and bit down hard until it hurt. “That’d be great.” He glanced toward the bedroom. “I’ve got my computer, phone, and wallet. That’s all I need.”
“Dex?” Mom touched his arm.
“I’m sorry you had to witness that,” Dexter said. “You should go now. I doubt she’ll want to see any of you for a while.”
He ushered them out then closed the door. It stuck, of course, which caused a pain to throb in his chest that he forced away. He gave his mother a quick kiss good-bye but didn’t say a word more to the others. He couldn’t look at them, couldn’t look at the lake, the house. He just got in Luke’s Jeep, fastened his seat belt, and stared straight ahead.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not even a little.”
“It’s another fifteen minutes to the airport.” Luke said, pointing at the car’s GPS. “Long trip if we’re both silent.”
“Silence is golden after the week I’ve had, let me tell ya.” Saying that made him feel like a dick, but whatever. Maybe he was a bigger dick than everyone thought. A giant ass, like Jules had said. He could live with that.
When they stopped at a red light, Luke kept looking at him, then away. It drove Dex effing mad. “Say what you need to.” He heard the edge in his voice, but didn’t care. “Get it off your chest, dude. Just stop staring at me—shit.”
“I do have something to say.” Luke’s tone was calm, like Jules’s yoga voice. Thinking that made Dexter want to jump out of the moving car.
“Not too long ago,” Luke continued, “I went through hell to be with Natalie. I loved her that much, but didn’t know it because I was too busy being an idiot. Not that I asked for it, but you gave me some good advice back then. Now I owe you. Plus, I’m your older brother.”
Dexter was in no mood to argue, so he let Luke go on.
“Did Jules do something? Break a trust?”
“No.”
“Does she have a secret identity in Russia?”
Dexter almost laughed, but it hurt his chest. “No.”
Luke fell silent, but Dexter knew he wasn’t finished. Good hell. He wanted this to be over so he could concentrate solely on what was important.
“You have a rep, man,” Luke finally added.
“Yeah?” A pile of rocks sat in his stomach.
Luke’s fingers gripped the steering wheel, white-knuckling the thing. “Did you cheat on her?”
“No.” He looked Luke dead in the eyes. “I’d never do that.”
“So what is it? You suddenly don’t love her?”
Dexter stared out the passenger window, kneading the red-hot pain in his forehead. “Maybe I never did.” It was the only answer he could give. But saying it felt like a lie.
“I’m no expert,” Luke continued, “but I’ve been through a divorce. It was the worst kind of pain, but it was the right thing to do. You need to do the right thing for you, just think it through. Be honest with yourself. Ask the right questions.”
“Like what?”
“Do you miss her? Right now, do you miss her?”
Dexter wanted to nod, but refused to move. So what if he missed her. That didn’t change anything.
“Were you happier with her than without her? Don’t bother answering because I know you were. We’ve seen you this week. You’ve changed.”
“If I did, it was temporary.”
“You’re an idiot.” Luke swerved to run over a pothole on Dexter’s side of the car. “Truth hurts, doesn’t it, bro?”
Something hurt, that was for damn sure. Was it the truth burning a hole in his gut? Truthfully, he couldn’t think of the last time he’d been completely honest with anybody. Or completely himself.
No, he did know. The last time was when he’d been on that massage table with Jules…the hours that followed when it was just him and just her.
“I told her we barely know each other.”
“What?”
“That was one of the last things I said to her.” Along with so many things I can’t take back. He closed his eyes, wanting to picture her but not wanting to. “Just like you, though, I know this is for the best. We don’t belong together. It was an accident.”
“Accident?” Luke slowed down as they neared the passenger drop-off curb. “What do you mean?”
Maybe he should tell his brother the truth. It might be cause for banishment from all future Elliott family betting, but at least he’d come clean.
It was no longer Dexter’s secret, though. Telling anyone might jeopardize Jules’s house. No matter what other crap he did, it’d have to be practically life-or-death for him to risk that.
“Nothing.” Dexter shook his head. “It’s over. Few months from now, it’ll be like it never happened. I’m not a relationship guy. You know that, everyone in the whole damn world knows. I don’t know why I thought this could be different, even for a second. I was stupid.”
“Dex.” Luke’s forehead was lined with concern. “Want me to park? I’ll come in, we’ll grab a beer.”
He shook his head again. “I gotta go. Thanks for the ride.”
“Look, you’ve got a problem. Let’s talk about it. I know it’s none of my business, but we can figure it out.”
Dexter was beyond talking, beyond thinking of Jules or any of it. He c
ouldn’t get out of there fast enough.
“You know what, Luke,” he said, climbing out of the Jeep, “you’re right, this is none of your business. I’m not some scientific problem you can solve with logic. So don’t worry. Go back to your comfy life in Hershey. I’ve got more important things to do.”
If he’d allowed himself to have any feelings, the way his brother was now looking at him would’ve made Dexter double over in pain. But as it was, he felt nothing.
“And here, take this.” He tossed the check with his half of the bet winnings on the dashboard. “I don’t want it. It’s all bullshit.”
Luke sat back in his seat. “Have a safe trip,” he said, then pulled away from the curb.
The flight was on time, so that was one less headache he had to deal with. And the American Airlines Executive Club lounge wasn’t crowded. Thank goodness for small miracles. Dexter plugged in his laptop and opened the presentation for tomorrow’s meeting. He had the notes app open, which showed the comments beneath the slides.
Almost every one of the slides that had to do with the graphic interface had “ask Jules” in the notes.
He forced his fists to relax when he realized he was clenching them.
I’m doing the right thing, he told himself. Long-term relationships aren’t for me. Never will be. Luckily, I stopped this before I really did start to care. No caring—no drama. That’s reality.
When the other side of his brain tried to argue, Dexter gagged it.
With the notes app closed, he started at the beginning of the presentation. Maybe because he was upset with how he’d left things with Luke, but he was having a hard time concentrating.
In through the nose, hold, expand the belly and chest, out through the nose. Listen to your breathing, feel each breath as it leaves your lungs…
“Sir? Mr. Elliott?” Someone nudged him. “Your flight is boarding.”
“Oh.” Dexter sat up and blinked the cobwebs from his brain. “Thanks.” As he shut his laptop, he noticed he was still on slide one. Where had the hour gone? No time to wonder. He rushed to the gate, the last passenger to board and strap in. He glanced at the empty seat beside him. Less than a week ago, Jules would’ve been right here, curled in a ball, no shoes, hair in her face, making sweet noises he now knew came from what he did to her when they were alone.
Wife for the Weekend Page 20
