She nodded, helping herself to more pizza. “I have one sister and two stepsisters. My sister, Sarah, hated farming. She left the farm when she was still in her early twenties. She lives in Idaho.” She sipped her soda. “My stepsister Lisa lives in Florida, and Laura is visiting her right now. My other stepsister, Becky, is pregnant, and she lives in California. It’s a difficult, high-risk pregnancy, and it’s a shame she couldn’t come to my father’s funeral.”
“Is this her first child?” Frank took another slice of pizza and sprinkled red pepper flakes on it. His leg jiggled beneath the table, and she wondered if he was nervous.
“No, she has two more, and she’s really struggling right now. She’s a stay-at-home mom, and her husband works full-time. Since her pregnancy has been so difficult and she is supposed to take it easy, a lot of people from her church have been helping her out.”
“It sounds like you’re close to your stepsisters.”
Emily shook her head. “We’re not really that close. I’ve seen them off and on since my dad married Laura. I’m not as close to them as I am to Sarah.”
They ate in silence for a few minutes before Frank asked another question. “Why are you so against your mother hiring an accountant? You never answered me earlier.”
She sighed. “This is a family business, and you are not family. When Dad died, I wanted to try and figure out the bookkeeping myself, and I wanted my stepmother to help, but we kept arguing about it. I asked her if she’d at least wait for a couple of months to give me some time to go through Daddy’s files.”
“And she didn’t agree to do that?” he guessed. “I guess not, because she’s gone and you’re here.”
“Well, your attitude is not very smart.”
She frowned. “Why do you say that?”
He folded his arms in front of him, his leg continuing to jiggle. “Emily, you just admitted that you know nothing about the way your father accounted for the profits to your farm. You need an accountant to help you figure things out. You certainly don’t want to be flagged for an audit by the IRS. If you are, it’ll make things more difficult if you don’t know what you’re doing.”
Pressing her lips together, she looked toward the counter. He touched her hand. “Hey, don’t get offended. I just don’t think you’ve thought through this very clearly.”
“Whatever,” she mumbled, draining her soda cup.
He chuckled, gazing at the empty pizza box. “I guess we had big appetites tonight.”
“I tend to eat a lot of food.”
“Do you?”
He seemed surprised, so she explained. “I’ve always eaten a lot of food, because doing those farm chores every day works up an appetite.”
“You can’t tell that you have a big appetite by looking at you,” Frank said before he finished his soda.
Once he’d gathered his papers and placed them back into his briefcase, he closed it and paid the bill before they returned to his car. After he turned on the air conditioning, she rummaged through her purse. “I can pay for half the pizza.”
“It’s just a pizza. Besides, I can expense the meal since we were talking about business most of the time, anyway.” When they pulled into the dairy farm, he reminded her that he would be returning the following day.
After she had showered and gotten ready for bed, she was about to open her Bible when her phone rang. “Hello?”
“Hi, Emily.”
“Kelly, hi. What’s up?”
Her best friend told her about the date she was looking forward to. “I can’t wait to see Martin again.”
When Kelly continued to speak, Emily struggled to listen as fatigue washed over her entire body like a tidal wave. “Did you call just to talk about Martin?”
“No. I was wondering if you wanted to go shopping with me next Saturday. I’m going to get my hair and nails done; then I’m going to look for a new outfit for my date Saturday night.”
Emily lay back on her pillows, thinking about how busy she was the following weekend. “I want to go to the livestock auction. Is Christine going shopping with you?”
“I’d ask her, but I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
“Why not?”
“Do you have to ask? Christine loves shopping a bit too much. She admitted that if she doesn’t curb her compulsive shopping habit, she’ll never be able to get rid of all her debt.”
“She just needs to find something else to do in her spare time besides shopping.” Emily changed the subject. “How are things over at the bank?” She struggled to listen but had a hard time staying awake. She thought about her crazy day, and her fatigue lifted for a few seconds when her brain focused on other things. Emily told Kelly about the difficult birth and about Frank showing up to help her. She then talked about the meeting she’d had with him at the pizza parlor.
“Oh, Em, it sounds like you had a very stressful day.”
“Yes, I just don’t know what to do.”
“What can you do? Your stepmother is still in charge of the farm. Isn’t she the official owner since your dad died?”
“Sort of. Dad’s will made her the owner of a larger percentage, but part of this farm is mine. That’s why I wish she had told me she’d hired an accountant to look at the books.”
“Em, you need to let go a bit. You can’t do everything by yourself. When your dad died, Laura had to argue with you about hiring Jeremy and Darren to help with the milking.”
“My dad and I always did the milking together.”
Kelly’s sigh carried over the wire. “But your dad’s not here anymore, Em, and you need help.”
Tears rushed to Emily’s eyes, and she wiped them away. Sniffing, she grabbed a tissue. Kelly was silent for a few moments before continuing. “Have you talked to your stepmom today?”
“No, she didn’t call me back.”
Kelly spoke again. “When you were telling me about Frank, you sounded a little excited. Is he cute?”
Emily threw her soiled tissues into the trash can beside her bed. “Yes!” She recalled Frank’s physical attributes. “He’s got medium brown skin, and he’s really tall, taller than me. He’s got these nice brown eyes with long lashes, and he wears the best-smelling cologne. When I’m around him, it’s kind of hard for me to stay focused.”
“Sounds like you’re interested in him.”
“No, I failed to mention that I saw some liquor bottles in his backseat.” She thought about it for a few minutes. “We mostly talked about the farm, and I told him about the revenue that flowed in, and he wanted to know the cycles for the crops and about last year’s selling prices.” She mentioned what he’d told her about his sister’s husband and her children.
“Did you have a good time talking to him?”
“It wasn’t a bad time, but … I don’t know. I sensed he was nervous or something. His leg kept jiggling under the table.”
“Maybe he likes you.”
“I doubt it.”
“How old is he?”
“I’m not sure. I think he might be a little bit older than me.”
They talked about Frank for a few more minutes before Emily yawned. “I think I’m going to sleep right now. Are you getting ready to go to bed?”
Before Kelly could comment, her other line clicked. “Kelly, I’ve got to go. That might be Mom calling me back.” Kelly said good-bye before Emily clicked to the other line. “Hello?”
“Emily, it’s me.”
“Mom! What took you so long to call me back?”
“I wanted to give you a chance to cool down before I called. I knew you’d be upset about me hiring that accountant.”
Emily huffed, and her fatigue evaporated, replaced with anger. “Why did you hire him without asking me first?”
“I did ask you, but all you wanted to do was argue about it. I felt justified to overstep your wishes since you don’t always know what’s best. You’re just as stubborn as your father, and I didn’t think you’d ever listen to reason, so that�
��s why I signed the paperwork so the accountant could show you what to do.”
Emily gritted her teeth, still struggling to calm down. She closed her eyes, silently praying for strength. She decided to change the subject since there was nothing she could do about Laura’s hiring Frank. “How is Lisa doing?”
Laura groaned. “Not too good. She broke up with her boyfriend right before Paul died, and now all she does is go to work and then come home to mope around.” Once she’d talked about Lisa, she said that Becky was still doing about as well as could be expected with her pregnancy. Emily had wondered why Laura would visit Lisa so long when Becky seemed to need her more. She was practically on bed rest. When Emily had asked Laura about it, Laura had sadly told her that she didn’t think Becky wanted her to come for an extended visit.
“Mom, Frank will be back tomorrow. We’ll probably place you on a conference call so you’ll know what’s going on.”
“Thanks, Emily. I appreciate that.” Emily said good-bye to Laura before hanging up the phone, curling beneath the blankets, and drifting to sleep.
three
Following the forty-minute drive from Monkton, Frank cruised down Pratt Street near the Inner Harbor. He barely paid attention to the throngs of people walking the sidewalks on the warm summer night. The blue electric wave decorating the Baltimore Aquarium blazed in the darkness, and he sighed, anxious to get to his recently rented apartment in the heart of Baltimore.
Once he’d parked, he opened the door to his backseat and removed the glass bottles filled with liquor. He sighed, riding the elevator to his loft apartment. After unlocking the door, he threw his briefcase onto the couch, opened the refrigerator, and pulled out a club soda. He placed several ice cubes into the plastic tumbler. He then poured a little soda over the ice before pouring a healthy amount of his favorite imported scotch into the container. Sitting on the couch, he sipped his drink, his frazzled nerves slowly calming after he’d drunk half the amount in the glass.
The nervous twitch in his leg stopped when he settled into his nighttime routine. He lifted the remote, turning on the network news, thinking about his weird day. When his boss suggested he take the Cooper client, he felt it was just what he needed.
It turned out he was wrong.
When Emily was around him, he couldn’t stay focused. The spark of delight that shined in her eyes when she spoke of her farm warmed his heart. He continued to nurse his drink. Her long dark hair and creamy brown complexion made it hard for him to concentrate on his work.
Before they’d gone into Michael’s Pizza for dinner, he noticed her frown when she saw the booze in his car. He’d also noticed that she prayed for her meal before she ate. He shook his head. Emily reminded him so much of Julie that it was scary.
His thoughts continued to wander as he entered the kitchen and fixed another drink. When he returned to the couch, he lifted his wedding photo, touching Julie’s face, again wondering when he would get over the pain of losing his wife. Taking sip after sip, his mind grew fuzzy as the alcohol chased away the demons that haunted him.
During the next few days working on Emily’s farm, Frank tried hard to ignore his attraction to her. She patiently answered his questions about the farm, providing necessary information he needed to do his job. They called her stepmother via speakerphone, and he consulted with Laura about what he planned on doing about the bookkeeping and the audit. He told the older woman he’d be doing the audit for at least a week or more, and she seemed to accept his presence in her home. He still wondered if his attraction to Emily was a good thing. Thoughts of Julie still hovered in his mind, and Emily was the first person he had met who could make him forget about his wife for hours at a time.
When Frank opened his eyes the following Saturday morning, his head felt like it was going to explode. He checked the bedside clock, glad that it was still early, only six thirty. Once he drank a few cups of black coffee, he would feel ready to go into the office before heading out to Emily’s farm. His boss was always hounding him about working too many overtime hours on the weekends, but Frank found he enjoyed working more than being alone in his apartment. Working long hours helped make his mind too tired to dwell on the problems he struggled to forget. His cell phone chirped. He lifted the small black instrument from his nightstand and groaned when he saw his sister’s phone number displayed in the caller ID window. He closed his eyes and sighed for a few seconds before answering the call. “What is it, Trish?”
“Good morning to you, too, little brother. I should have had Mark call you from his cell phone instead. You seem happier talking to my children than to me.”
He lay back on the pillow, trying to relieve his throbbing headache and ignoring her apt observation. “Do you realize it’s six thirty in the morning?”
“Yes, but I’ve been calling you since you moved to Baltimore, and you never answer your phone, yet you always answer when Mark calls. I figured if I called you early enough, you’d at least think it was an emergency.”
He rubbed his eyes. “Is there an emergency?”
She hesitated. “Yes.”
“Yeah, I’ll bet there is.” Sarcasm filled his voice. “What’s the emergency?”
“Mom’s been pretty upset since you left.”
“I’ve been pretty upset since she rejected my wife.” His sister sighed, and he struggled to control his temper. “What does Mom want me to do?”
“She wants you to start talking to her and Dad again. Julie’s dead now and—”
“Just because Julie’s dead means I need to forget what they’ve done?”
“But it’s been over a year. Don’t you think it’s time to move on?”
“No, I don’t,” he grunted. “Look, my head hurts, and I don’t feel like talking about this right now.”
She ignored his comment. “Dad hasn’t been feeling well.”
He sat up in bed, his stomach churning from the sudden movement. He calmed himself down before asking, “Is he okay?”
“See, I know you still care.”
He ignored the comment. “Is Dad okay?” he repeated.
“He’s been complaining a lot about having a headache, and Mom says he’s hardly eating.”
“What does the doctor say?”
She sighed, her voice wavering. “He refuses to go to the doctor.” The siblings were silent for a few seconds before Trish spoke again. “I think Dad’s guilt about what happened is eating away at him.”
He gritted his teeth. “Trish, you know they were wrong! You finally became friends with Julie. You know how much I loved her. … You know why I loved her.”
“I loved Julie, too.”
“I know you did. She always told me if she were to have a sister, she’d want her to be just like you.”
“I know. That’s why you really need to get over yourself and stop running away from your problems.”
“I’m not running away—”
“But you are. Don’t you get it?”
“No, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes, you do. I’ll bet you’re still having nightmares about Julie’s death, and you probably have a headache because you got drunk last night.”
Frank winced at the truth of his sister’s words, refusing to confirm her suspicions. “I’m dealing with it the only way I know.”
“Well, you need to find another way to deal with your pain. Alcohol and nightmares are doing nothing to help you.”
“Well, what do you suggest I do?”
“If I told you, you wouldn’t want to hear it.”
“Try me.”
“Why don’t you do what Julie would have wanted you to do? Why don’t you give God a chance? Since Julie led me to the Lord, I’ve found it so much easier to deal with my problems.”
“I don’t see how you can talk about trusting the Lord. Your husband left you! Look at all the problems you’ve been having with Mark and Regina since he left.”
“It’s been hard, but I’m trying to tea
ch my kids that even though their earthly father is not around much anymore, they have a heavenly Father who loves them and will never leave them.” He remained silent. “You might want to give God a try and let Him help you with all that you’re dealing with. Another thing you might want to do is not be so angry at Mom and Dad.”
“Wait a minute.”
“No, you wait a minute. Just hear me out about this. I know Mom and Dad didn’t like Julie because she didn’t come from a good family, and it was wrong of them to think like that. But you have to remember that money’s been in our family for decades, and Mom and Dad have been raised to think this way. It’s wrong, but in their own twisted way, they felt this was one way to show their love for us: making sure we chose an appropriate mate from a prestigious family.”
He was speechless, unsure of how to respond to his sister’s comment. Before he could say anything, she changed the subject. “You’ll never guess who I saw at the grocery store yesterday.”
“Who?”
“Brian. He said a lot of the kids at the rec center still ask about you, and I told him that you’d moved to Baltimore.” She sighed. “You’ve been so sad and bitter since Julie died. You used to be so happy spending your free time at the rec center helping Brian mentor those teenagers. I remember how you used to look forward to having some kids of your own.”
He swallowed, tears rushing to his eyes as he recalled the happier times in his life.
“Look, I have to go now. I need to start making breakfast for the kids. I just wanted you to think about what I’ve told you and to try and talk to Mom and Dad again.”
He wiped his eyes and grunted before he ended the call, not wanting to discuss the matter further. He got out of bed and took some acetaminophen. His stomach still roiled when he made his way to the kitchen. He measured dark grinds into the filter, and the fragrant scent of coffee soon filled the air. Taking a mug from the cupboard, he filled it with his morning brew, sat at a chair in the kitchen, and thought about Trish’s advice. He just wasn’t ready to forgive his parents for what they’d done—he just couldn’t.
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