She started humming faster, which meant she was gettin’ close. Any kind of touching would throw off her concentration, so my fingers were fisted up in the sheets on either side of her. We need to wrap this up. I should start humming that shit they play during award shows to cut off the actor’s speeches. The joints in my fingers were getting stiff and uncomfortable and on top of that my jaw and the back of my neck were starting to hurt. I put everything I had into the final stretch of my tongue marathon.
I waited until the humming stopped before wiping my mouth and the sweat out my eyes. Eva squirmed as I worked my way up from underneath the covers. Balancing over her I leaned down to give her a kiss and got a mouthful of pillow. It didn’t make any sense. The room was pitch-black plus I was under the damn cover. Everybody always talked all this mess about church girls being the biggest freaks. Myth busted. I had the princess of stone-cold prudishness in my bed every night.
I pulled the pillow off her face. “Baby, you all right?”
“Mmm hmm,” Eva sighed.
“You know it’d be nice if I felt all right too,” I told her.
I pressed the length of myself against her stomach so she could feel my frustration. She’d done left me high and hard one too many times to count. I could feel the start of the worst concentrated cramp known to man building up in my groin like a pissed off corked bottle of champagne. You don’t shake that shit up and just set it down; hell no, you pop the fuckin’ bottle and enjoy that champagne shower.
Eva exhaled, giving me a quick apology peck on my shoulder. “And if we did all that I’d have to get up, take a shower, get clean sheets, probably wake the baby up and then I’d have to put her back to sleep. Dontay, baby, I’m tired. And I came too hard; my booty hole got a charley horse,” she complained.
My shoulders slumped in disappointment. I pressed my lips to her forehead and rolled over to my side of the bed feeling like I could tear a building down with my bare hands. The sheets on my half were cold but not cold enough. This whole situation was frustrating enough to drive a priest to the bottle. No man wants to walk around feeling like his girl has some kind of dick aversion because she always running away or hiding from it.
Glaring up at the ceiling I wondered if there was a step I’d forgotten or if my game had really just fallen off all together. None of my exes were this hard to crack; hell I used to have make up shit just to get a break from puttin’ in work. Frustration was compounding on top of fuckstration. The only way I was going to feel any kind of relief would be from an ice-cold shower.
Eva had already dozed off so I left the lights off, stubbed my toe twice, and hobbled into the shower cursing under my breath. I cursed again when I lathered up with one of her botanical explosion shower gels that smelled like it could make a bee go in heat. How is it Bath & Body Works can come up with a million ways to remix fruit and flowers but they can’t put the men’s line in a different shaped bottle?
When I finally had myself under control I climbed out realizing I ain’t have a towel. I snatched one of Eva’s out the hamper. She never used the same one more than two days in a row anyway so by my standards it was damn near laundry fresh. I toweled off wishing I knew how to break through her mental block. For a minute I just stood there like a lovesick fool, shaking my head at myself. How did I go from getting more ass in my parents’ crib to living on my own and getting next to none? I’d retired my player jersey and let my whole stable of on-call super freaks go just for her. Woodsy karo karounde blossoms and soft baie rose scents were imprinted on the fluffed cotton towel from Eva’s skin. It was intoxicating and haunting, like the scent of her I’d just washed off my face. I looked down pissed that I’d managed to work myself back up into a frenzy. Guess I’m gonna have to handle this the old-fashioned way.
A hand is man’s best friend. I revisited my playgirls from earlier, letting them moan and dance in my head. Every dude has a favorite selection of on-demand porn clips in his head. Multitasking would probably be a helluva lot better if we deleted that mental memory file, but we’d probably use that brain power to focus on getting in trouble. In a last-second call to increase the reality and freak level I fought back a moan feeling the first pulls of release. I grabbed panties from the hamper ignoring the crazy weirdo impression anyone would have gotten if I got caught. I needed some freakiness in my life something serious.
The soft pussy-perfumed lace touched my nose and the reaction was instant. My knees almost buckled. Liquid heat splat up against the bathroom wall and Eva’s panties landed on my foot. My nostrils were still filled with that unmistakable putrid odor. To a dude it’s like sitting in your own fart cloud: you can tolerate it all day easy. But when it ain’t your own, it turns your stomach, makes you gag and run for the nearest window. No nigga wants to smell another nigga’s spunk.
Hands down, that was the most painfully disgusting and infuriating way to find out Eva was cheating.
Chapter 14
Eva Thems the Rules
Our apartment complex was one of those starter apartments with two families on each floor and each building goes up three floors. We were somehow lucky enough to have landed on the middle floor underneath a professional mover. No, really, the man above us never stayed still for more than a few minutes at a time. He stomped, paced, or whatever it is you want to call it, from one end of his apartment to the next all day and night. We couldn’t hang pictures or mirrors, the walls shook, they’d rattle, jingle, and fall. This was our starter apartment; that’s what Dontay called it. I was just happy for once buffalo butt upstairs didn’t sound like he was coming through the ceiling and I could finish what Dontay had tried to start.
I was always filled with the guiltiest feeling when we were together. You really don’t forget your first and Dontay wasn’t giving me any crazy insane comparisons. Sighing, I lay back trying to block out all the sounds of people living on top of people. The pipes clanked in the wall whenever anyone in the building flushed or showered. The moisture also formed a pretty tight seal around the door so you had to yank a few good times to get the door open. Dontay finished his shower and the sound of the bathroom door popping loose broke me completely out of my zone.
And the Didn’t Get to Finish for the Second Time in One Night Award goes to none other than yours truly. I eased my vibrator back into its hiding place between the mattresses. He came into the bedroom smelling like gardenia and sweet cassis mixed with manly sandalwood and black coriander, and making way more noise than normal. I peeked at Jada in her crib.
“Shhh. And how many times I gotta remind you to just reach your Stretch Armstrong arms up? You’ll find all your shower gels along the top ledge. Because you’re, duh, taller,” I whispered at him in the dark before rolling over and facing the wall.
After a few minutes when I didn’t feel the bed shift or hear him moving around the bed room I realized I was all by my lonesome. Carefully leaning over the side of the bed I scanned the place with my ears on sonar. The living room was still dark but I was able to just barely make him out lying on the couch. He was probably pissed and pouting because he didn’t get any booty or head. If he thought throwing a temper tantrum was about to make it happen it wasn’t. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to or didn’t like to. We used to sneak and do things all the time all over the place. Something was just, ugh, off.
Like how I couldn’t stand his nipple game. He’d latch on like one of those fish that cleans the sides of aquariums. His lips and tongue never really moved; they just sat there around my nipple until it started to become the most annoying feeling in the world. And he forgot there were two nipples so I literally had to pop his face off one only for him to do the same irritating shit to the other side. Teaching didn’t work because, just like with his shower gel in the bathroom, he did the same thing every time no matter what. Eventually I just gave up and came up with the “don’t touch my nipples” rule.
Dontay’s idea of eating coochie was like watching Flick from A Christmas Story sticking the t
ip of his tongue on a frozen flagpole: fearful, timid, tip only, one-spot action. I was pretty sure he got more wet from drooling than from me. Since when had the tip ever satisfied anybody? I hummed so I could keep track of how long his behind had been down there. Humming came in really handy now because it helped me stay focused, too.
The sound of Dontay’s phone vibrating against the wooden coffee table echoed through our apartment like a swarm of bees. Those same bees started gathering in the pit of my stomach in the form of an angry feeling. I wasn’t the jealous type but then again he wasn’t normally the type to sleep on the couch or text late at night either. What does it mean if I love someone with all my heart but I just don’t love it when he touches me?
I woke up in the same position I fell asleep in. Dontay was making so much noise trying to open the closet door he’d have had better luck just snatching it open. I watched him for a few minutes wondering if maybe I was just taking him for granted. His shoulders were almost as wide as the doorway; he ducked into the closet coming out a few seconds later empty-handed.
It was barely light outside and it sounded like a scene from Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds outside. We happened to have the only patch of trees in the entire apartment complex outside of our bedroom window. Most mornings every walk of wildlife would convene out there like I was some kind of urban Cinderella.
“Dontay, you okay, baby?”
“Yeah. I’ll be back later; gonna see about this warehouse job.” He didn’t look in my direction or further acknowledge me before just strolling out.
Where was my good-bye kiss or at least a hug? I grabbed my phone off the charger on the nightstand.
Storie sounded drunk and half asleep. “You okay? My godbaby good?”
“Dontay left and he didn’t kiss me or the baby,” I told her.
“Girl, I am free and manless. You know Bear been out of town for his job. Do I need me to get my ski mask and come through?” she asked.
“No, I got this. But if you’re using my place to creep again, please take your funky-ass drawers with you. I’m tired of doing your stank ho laundry. If I find one more pair of your crusty-cum drawers somewhere crazy I’m taking your key back. You and that side squirtle you humpin’ can go to a hotel like regular creepers,” I warned her.
She hung up still laughing. Praise the Lord I got home before Dontay because I’d have had one hell of a time trying to explain that. Only because she was like a sister to me did those nasty things not go in the trash. Vicki’s ain’t cheap so I wrapped them up good in a towel and buried them in the one place Dontay didn’t know existed: the laundry hamper. They’d get washed when I went to the laundromat.
Chapter 15
Eva Bye Bye Alibi
The next morning I stood barefoot in his oversized Sean John T-shirt, the one I’d given him for his birthday to match one of the umpteen hundred pairs of Jordans he owned. His shoes damn near took up an entire wall of the bedroom almost blocking the sliding glass door onto the balcony. Dontay was beyond obsessed with them. Something just ain’t right about a man being that gone over some sneakers. They were stacked halfway up the wall, organized according to the color and release date all in their original boxes. Every pair could only be worn once before they were retired to the sacred J burial ground that was slowly taking over our closet. Why he had to have retro shoes in every color if he already had the originals was beyond me. He had more pictures of himself with them stupid shoes than with his own daughter.
He should have known I was mad. Standing in any doorway when I was pissed meant I was a hair of a breath from going slam the heck off if I walked into the same room as whoever had done it. He sat on the couch by the front door quietly pulling on his shoes.
February sunshine slid through the cracks in the blinds. The rays bounced off the chunky diamond in his ear, another gift from yours truly. The sun kissed the thick muscles in his shoulders; his pecs and abs flexed as he sat back. My blood started to run hot from a reason other than anger. I crossed my legs tight to match the current position of my arms. No, Eva, don’t you dare say a damn thing to his ass. How was it I could notice when he got an edge up from a different barber or did a thinner or thicker beard? Or just stopped shaving all together as he’d been doing this month, face lookin’ like some kind of raggedy coochie hair taco meat mess.
Yet he hadn’t said a word about my eyebrows I’d just gotten waxed or that he liked my hair parted down the middle hanging halfway down my back. I thought he was aiming for a Rick Ross look but he ain’t have the fullness or the complexion for it. He was just too pretty.
Dontay eased his behind up off the couch, threw on his favorite green Under Armour shirt and matching green and gold hoodie and grabbed his gym bag and my car keys off the table. “I’m gonna meet some of the guys so we can get a couple of games in before work. See you when I get off,” he stated casually, barely glancing in my direction.
“Hold up, are you sure you aren’t off today?” I asked.
“I picked up an overtime shift until one of the other jobs I applied to picks me up. Gotta save to get us a better spot for Jada. Anyway, I’ll see you later tonight.”
No kiss, no hug, no Happy Valentine’s Day. No, he didn’t pick up a shift on damn Valentine’s Day of all days. I was so mad I could spit and it’d probably burn a hole through the floor. That’s how heated I was. It’d burn until I could see into Mrs. Kim’s apartment below us.
I’d made plans to have the chubby little Korean woman watch Jada for the rest of the night because I thought Dontay was off. Yes, we needed the extra money since he was supposed to be paying the brunt of the bills. Mad notices were starting to come in with past due stamps making me wonder where his money was going or if he just couldn’t say it was all too much. But, to go play ball in this kind of cold and during the little time we could’ve spent together was . . . suspicious.
Now I felt like Boo Boo the fool for wanting to do something special. All this mess was nowhere in my life plan. With a heavy sigh I tiptoed across the bedroom to grab my purse. I stepped over sweaty boxers and work tees, socks and spare change. The clothes hamper wasn’t but an arm’s reach from where he’d dropped all his mess. It’ll stay right there, too. I am not his live-in housekeeper. I quickly checked his laptop and was disappointed when it immediately asked me for his password. When I’d helped him buy it we set up my name as the password but he’d changed that a long time ago. Lately he’d started falling asleep on the couch claiming he was too tired to come to bed.
Jada was still asleep in her crib. I was tempted to wake her up so she wouldn’t be up all night but that little girl loved two things: sleep and food. It was probably wrong for me to pray that she’d eventually grow out of his almond-shaped gray eyes and that they’d turn wide and brown like mine. There were plenty of times I stood over her debating on cutting her ridiculously long daddy long leg–looking lashes. Those were her damn daddy’s lashes; mine were short and thick. Leave that baby alone, Eva. We’d have our own little Valentine’s dinner and that itis would put her right back out. I needed to find that receipt for the gift I’d bought him. When I couldn’t find it in my purse I wound up searching every shred of paper in the house.
It must have fallen out of his gym bag. The receipt was from a month ago. It was for a Pandora bracelet with an engraved charm. The inscription he requested said U R REAL LOVE. I sank to the floor. For the first time ever I felt blank. I didn’t even try convincing myself it was a gift he’d bought to give me later tonight. The overtime he’d been working, the distance between us, even his attitude toward me all pointed at him having a “real love” who apparently wasn’t me.
I put the receipt in my purse and stared blankly at the gift I’d bought for him. Tiny diamonds winked up at me. What you look like giving a man all these diamonds, when you ain’t got a single one your damn self?
The song “Happy” by Tasha Cobbs started blasting from my phone cradled beside the bed. I dove, bouncing across the bed to answer it
before Jada woke up hollerin’.
“Hey, pud,” I sang into the phone while tryin’ to catch my breath.
“Happy Valentine’s Day, boo,” Storie shouted in my ear.
“Ugh. Ain’t no Valentine’s Day up over here; you know this fool forgot. So you know I’m takin’ his present back after work tomorrow.”
“Girl, you need to let that go. Y’all ain’t been the same since that night we do not speak of anyway. But just because you got his baby don’t meant you need to stay with him, Eva.”
“I know, but I ain’t make Jada by myself and I’m not trying to raise her that way. I’m gonna talk to him about all that when he gets off work tonight.”
“Well hopefully me and Bear will be getting off by then. I ain’t gave him none in two weeks and I been using my honey dust powder. It makes your skin and your sweat taste like honey. If it was summer I’d have all kinds of fruit flies and wildlife chasin’ behind my ass. He is gonna tear this up. Want us to come pick you and Jada up? Y’all can hang out with us. I’m just not responsible for anything you see or hear though.”
“No, girl. I’m not trying to rain on your day since mine is wack.”
“Please, it’s no big deal. If we have someone else around then he knows he’ll have to wait even longer to get this. That’ll give me just enough time to take me a vinegar bath and make sure my shit tightens back up. I had a blast from the past and um, Eva, I managed to sneak off and he blasted me away.”
Church Girl Gone Wild Page 11
