“I don’t want to, I just… I don’t want to take advantage of you while you’re upset.” He walked over to fetch my bag from the chair and handed it to me. “You can change in the bathroom.” I nodded and took my bag from him and turned. I closed the door behind me, dropping my bag to the floor and wiped the stray tear that slipped down my cheek.
I heaved a sigh and went to the sink to splash water over my face and wiped away my make-up. I brushed my teeth hoping it would get rid of the horrible sick feeling that I still felt and pulled my pyjamas from my bag. I removed all of my jewellery and laid it neatly out on the long counter by the sink, cursing the fact that I hadn’t put the boxes in my bag.
I reached for the zip at the back of my dress and remembered how I’d needed help to do it up. Shit! I tried to get it myself but it was too stiff, I only managed to move it a couple of inches. I looked to the door and back to the mirror and sighed at myself.
“Jamie?” He was sat on the bed with his elbows resting on his knees and his head resting in his palms. He slowly lifted his head to look at me. “I err… Violet’s mum had to do my zip up for me, it’s too stiff for me to get, can you erm… can you get it for me?” I asked nervously as my cheeks flared red. He raised an eyebrow as he stood from the bed and smirked at me as he walked over. He stood in front of me; bending his head a little he placed a gentle kiss against my lips.
“Turn around” He whispered against my lips. In one long movement he took my hair from my right shoulder and swept it all up over my left; his warm hands brushing over my neck made me shiver. I felt his nose brush through my hair and his lips gently press to my neck, I tried to hold in another shiver but couldn’t. Jamie’s hands went to my zipper and he began fiddling with it, obviously struggling just as much as Lisa and I had. “Wow you weren’t kidding.”
I laughed with him as his fingers skimmed down my back with the zipper all the way to the middle of my rear where the zip ended. I felt Jamie pull the opening of my dress slightly as he settled his thumbs into the indents of the two dimples on my lower back as his fingers curled around my hips; he shocked me by pressing his lips just above my panties, kissing a slow trail all the way up my spine.
I couldn’t help the moan that escaped my lips as I felt him kissing my neck again; his grip tightened on my hips in reply, pulling me closer to him. A little voice screamed at me reminding me how not ten minutes ago he’d pushed me away and I came back to my abandoned senses, turning in his grip to face him.
“Thanks… I should erm…” Looking up into his eyes I forgot all reason and purpose as I stumbled through my words to him. “I should go- I should go get changed.” He did nothing but nod slightly as I continued to stand there and stare up at him; his grip didn’t loosen on my hips and I made no effort to move away from him as his gaze flicked between my lips and my eyes.
Pushing the rising fear of rejection down in my stomach in a moment of bravery, I leaned forward and captured his lips with mine. Jamie softly returned my kiss and snaked his arms around my waist pulling me closer to him. I tentatively put my hands on his bare stomach, slowly moving up over his chest to his shoulders. He began to kiss over my cheek up to my ear and down my neck, as his hands crept up my body to slide the shoulders of my dress off; I dropped my hands from his shoulders and felt my dress skim down my body as it fell in a pool around my feet.
I slowly placed my hands back inside of his open shirt on his shoulders and began to push it back. Jamie undid the cuffs of his shirt and tugged it off quickly throwing it away; he kicked his shoes off and discarded of his socks. My hands went to his belt which I slowly unbuckled and I began kissing down his neck, his chest, his stomach, until I was trailing tiny kisses along the waistband of his trousers. I knelt on the floor in front of him and slowly undid his button and zip and removed his trousers, freeing his erection from the strain of them. I gave him a kiss through his boxers and kissed my way back up his body to his lips.
I wrapped my arms around his waist and began running my nails up and down his back, as I pulled him closer to me. “I think you are still a little over dressed” he whispered in my ear then walked around to stand behind me again; he moved my hair back over my left shoulder and began kissing my neck at my sweet spot. I tried to stifle the moan rising in my throat at the feel of his lips there again but I couldn’t.
Lifting my hand up to his hair, I held him there as I stumbled against him. He moved one hand to my lower abdomen applying a tiny amount of pressure that made my insides twist in pleasure; I could feel the wetness pooling between my legs as my body ached for him. His other hand roamed freely over my body settling to massage over my breasts, bringing them to hard points through my bra.
“Jamie…” I moaned. I wanted to tell him how much I wanted him, how much my body was calling to feel all of the hardness that was pressing against my rear.
Jamie wrapped both of his arms around my waist pulling my body tightly against his; he buried his face into my neck placing small, delicate kisses over my skin. His hands slowly began to wander all over my body again, spreading heat where they touched.
He sighed loudly as he ran his fingers over my thighs, feeling the lace edge of my stockings. I’d worn them for him in the hope of teasing him with more photos when I was getting changed.
“You like those?” I asked him coyly. He moved to stand in front of me again, taking my hand to help me step away from my dress.
“I like” he pulled me over to his huge bed and sat me at the edge. “But they are obstructing my view of what I know are the most beautiful pair of legs in the world. They need to go.” kneeling in front of me, he removed my shoes one by one then ran big circles up my legs with his thumbs up to the lace tops. Slowly, he began to pull them down, following the stocking with kisses all the way down my leg to my toes and doing the same with my other leg.
As he stood he took my hands to pull me up with him, capturing my lips again, kissing me deeply; his hands went around my back to the clasp of my bra. I didn’t know if I should be impressed or envious at how easy it was for him to undo. He slowly pulled it away, throwing it to land somewhere amongst our clothes and lifted me up; I wrapped my legs around his waist as he carried me up on to the bed, kissing me gently as he laid me down.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” I nodded. “Because in a few years when you think about the first guy you were with, you’ll always think of me.” I couldn’t think of anything that I wanted more, for Jamie to always be in my thoughts; in my life.
“I’m sure”
“I don’t want you to do this as a reaction to what happened tonight; I want you to want to because it means something to you, like it does to me.”
“What does it mean to you?” He exhaled a slow, calming breath.
“To me… It means that I will be making love to my girlfriend for the first time, sharing that moment with her, showing her how much I…” He stopped what he was about to say with a harsh bite of his bottom lip.
“What?” My heart was beating out of my chest, say it… Jamie, say it! “How much you what?”
“How much I’m in love with her… I love you.” It felt as though a million butterflies had just taken off in my stomach and lodged themselves in my throat. I ran my hand up over his cheeks and into his hair pulling him down to kiss me.
“Jamie…” I murmured against his lips and he pulled away to look at me. “I love you too.” I said it without thinking about it because I knew it was true. For years I thought I was in love with him, but I could see now that I was in love with the idea of loving him. I realised that in the three weeks we’d been sneaking around and talking all of the time that my feelings for him had changed, had become deeper.
He smiled down at me before crashing his lips to mine. His hands began to roam around my body making those wonderful feeling circles everywhere his hands went. Jamie began trailing kisses down my neck and over my chest pausing over each nipple as he drew it into his mouth, licking and sucking them. The feeling r
esonated through my body making all of my insides clench, my back arched from the bed into him. He moved his hands to my panties tracing small circles on me through the black lace, warmth pooling in them again.
“Jamie… Take them off.” he ignored me. “Jamie, please!” I began begging. He obliged by trailing his kisses down to my panties. Once he took them off he kissed his way up between my legs, I moaned softly as I felt his tongue glide over my opening, I was dying to feel him. He dipped his tongue inside of me, making me arch my back from the bed again. He did it again and again, twirling his tongue inside me before moving up to my swollen clit. Feeling his tongue flicking over the sensitive bundle of nerves made my insides clench tighter, I could feel them ready to spring free but he stopped.
“No, don’t stop.” I entwined my fingers in his hair trying to pull him closer to me so he would carry on.
“Shhh…” His warm breath fanned over my stomach as he ran his nose up my body. “Are you completely sure you want this?” he asked as he kissed along the curve of my neck along my shoulder. I pulled his face up to look at me and placed a kiss gently on his lips.
“Yes I am.” I said as I ran my fingers through his hair.
He stretched over the bed to his nightstand, rummaging blindly through the drawer with his hand. He pulled out a silver, foil packet, ripping it open with his teeth and blew the torn piece away. After quickly removing his boxers, he rolled the condom down his length eyeing me warily.
“You’ve stopped me more than once, are you really sure, Angel?”
“Yes, I want you, Jamie.” I whispered. “Now” came out almost as a moan, I had never wanted something or someone so much. I writhed underneath him, begging for any and all friction between us. He crashed his lips to mine again as he lowered his hips, the tip of his arousal rubbed against me as he settled himself at the entrance of my sex. “Jamie, please!”
He crashed his hips forward taking him right down, deep inside of me. I gasped at the sharp twist of pain I felt as he pushed through my virginity, an overwhelming feeling of how full of him I was came over me.
“Are you ok?” I blinked up at him taking a few deep breaths.
“I’m fine, don’t stop.” he pulled back and pushed deep inside me again, he watched me intently as he hovered above me. “Please” He drew his hips back to slowly ease into me over and over again, kissing me hard on my lips and neck as he did. With every thrust into me the pain eased as the pleasure took its place. I ran my hands up and down his back and wrapped my legs around his waist pulling him closer to me, deeper inside me.
I could feel my insides beginning to tighten up again and prayed he didn’t stop this time. I was so close. That feeling that I was starting to love crept through my body, from the tips of my fingers and toes in a wave of fire, coming to a peak of intensity at my core.
“Jamie… I’m…” I couldn’t get my words out, what I wanted to say got lost on its way from my brain to my mouth; lost in the heat surging around my body in wave after wave. “Oh God”
Jamie cried out my name as my insides began to spasm, tightening around him, holding him in to me. Sweet ripples ricocheted through my body from my core. He thrust into me one more time mumbling my name, with his face buried against my neck, his arm wound under my body pulling me up from the bed to be closer to him as he found his release deep inside of me. My limp body fell back to the bed, as he collapsed on top of me. Leaning up, he kissed me, resting his forehead against mine as we both tried to catch our breath, gasping for air.
“I’ve wanted to do that for weeks” He gasped and kissed me again. “I really am in love with you Olivia” he said before kissing me once more, stroking my hair from my face.
“I love you too, Jamie.” I winced as he eased out of me.
“Are you ok, baby? Are you sore?”
“A little but I’m ok.” It stung quite a bit, but I could live with it. “More than ok; are you ok?” What I really meant was it ok but couldn’t bring myself to ask that question.
“I’m perfect. I’ve just made love to my amazing and beautiful girlfriend for the first time, of course I’m ok. More than ok.” He said my words back to me smiling. He moved off of me and I began to feel self-conscious about being naked in front of him. It was silly as I had already been naked in front of him before and given what we had just done, but I pulled the duvet down and climbed in anyway to lay on my stomach.
“You can stop with the flattery; I already gave in to you.” I laughed and gently nudged him in the side with my elbow. He rolled over to his side and ran his hand up and down my bare back.
“Is that what you think? That I said it to sleep with you?”
“No, I was just teasing.” In the back of my mind maybe a small part of me thought it subconsciously.
“I meant every word of it. I didn’t know how or when to tell you, but I really mean it. I wanted to tell you earlier but I didn’t want to do it in school and you had to get to Lily anyway.” So that’s what it was! I smiled as he brushed his nose up my arm a little. “You should probably get some sleep now, Angel.” he kissed me on the head and I turned over to face him so our bodies were touching again. Lifting my leg up over his waist, I pressed my centre against him.
“I don’t want to sleep yet.” I said as I pulled his face to mine to kiss him. I wrapped my leg tighter around his waist and I could feel Jamie becoming hard again as he pressed against me. Feeling empowered, I pressed my hand against his shoulder pushing against him, he rolled to his back taking me with him to straddle him. My hair fell in a curtain down the sides of my face, Jamie lifted both of his hands to move it over my shoulders; he looked down over my body as I sat perched on top of him, his hands stuck to the curves of my waist and hips and my thighs that were spread over him, slowly running them up and down.
“You are too beautiful” I blushed as I smiled at him and bent down to kiss him. My hair fell down either side of his face, shielding us from the light of the bedside lamp. I pecked his lips lightly and led a trail of kisses down to his chin, over his jaw and up to his ear. I felt him hardening beneath me and smiled to myself.
“Enough talking” I whispered into his ear. I began kissing down his body, shifting to kneel between his legs. I took him in my hand, gently stroking his length up and down as he grew harder in my hand. My lips and tongue worked their way down his stomach to replace my hands. Kissing over tip of his hardness I ran my tongue over him, remembering how much he’d liked it the first time I’d done it. Slowly I slipped him between my lips and teeth, my teeth gently ran over the tip of him and he bucked wildly underneath me.
“Holy shit!” he gasped as I pulled him further into my mouth. My hand joined in with my mouth, gripping him tightly as I worked my way up and down on him. “Baby, I’m gonna come if you don’t stop!” I released my grip on him and slipped him from my mouth, kissing my way up to his belly button before heading back down again. “Oh God, Liv” Jamie called as I could feel his body stiffen as he prepared to release once more; I stopped, smiling and kissed my way back up his stomach again. “I know what you are doing.” He said as he pulled me up to straddle him again then wrapped my legs around his waist; he pulled himself up the bed to lean himself against the dark blue headboard, his head leaning back onto the soft material.
“What?” I asked with a smile at the corner of my mouth. I licked my lips seductively, I wasn’t finished with him and I wanted to carry on. I ran my fingers through his hair and pulled him towards me to kiss me. Rocking myself against him, heat pooled inside of me once more. “I want you again, Jamie.” He reached for another condom. I could feel his eyes studying my face as I watched his fingers roll the latex down his hard shaft. He wrapped his fingers around the base, working his way slowly up and down again. My mouth fell open with a quick exhale. I wanted that to be me.
I lifted my eyes to his again, finding that sexy smirk on his lips. He grabbed hold of my rear, pulling me closer to him, before lifting me. He slowly lowered me down on to him as a s
hiver crept its way through my body. He slowly lifted me and lowered me down again. I unwound my legs from his waist and knelt instead. “Is this ok?” I asked shyly, as I slowly moved on him.
He nodded “It’s perfect. You are perfect.” He said before pulling me into a hard kiss.
When I’d managed to gather my senses again, I slowly opened my eyes to find Jamie watching me as I came down from my high.
“That was so amazing. You are so amazing.” I looked down between us, hoping that my cheeks already being flush would hide the fact that I could feel them heating all over again.
“Really?”
“Really.” I gave him a shy smile as he brushed my hair away from my forehead and planted a kiss there. “Are you tired, baby?” I must have looked drained or just thoroughly fucked, I couldn’t decide as I nodded at him weakly. We got comfy down in the bed with me tightly tucked under his chin. He smelled like oranges and aftershave mixed in with the scent of sweat and sex that surrounded us after our love making.
“Jamie?”
“Hmm?”
“I love you” I whispered. I felt a flutter run through my stomach as I said it.
“I love you too.”
***
It was still dark when I woke up, I was alone and naked in a strange room. I realised I was in Jamie’s room, but where was he? I picked my clothes up from the floor. My dress was in pieces, my underwear was ripped to shreds and the heel on one of my shoes was broken. I specifically remembered Jamie slowly pulling the zipper down on my dress. Why was it so torn? I grabbed a sheet from the bed, wrapping it around myself and made my way to the door. The house was completely dark and lifeless as I wandered through it. I could feel eyes on me but I couldn’t find Jamie anywhere. I went back to the bedroom to see if he had gone back to bed but it was still empty. After a few minutes of me sitting on the bed alone the bathroom door opened. Why didn’t I think to look in there?
“Hey, I was looking for you”
Broken Ever After Page 17
