by Donya Lynne
What were they doing wrong?
“Here, maybe if I…” Brian reached down, grabbed his penis, and began shoving it against her private parts as if it were one of those round blocks in a children’s game and he was trying to jimmy the thing inside a square hole. “Can I move these?” He let go of his erection and tugged on her jeans, which still lay over her hips.
“Um…I don’t…” She didn’t want to lose her security blanket, but it was dark…and he wasn’t looking at her down there…and she was more concerned with keeping her top half covered than her lower half, anyway…and maybe it would be easier for him to get inside her if her jeans weren’t in the way. “Okay, sure.”
He yanked them out from between their bodies and tossed them under the coffee table.
“That’s better,” he said, taking hold of his penis again.
He pushed, he prodded, and then, with a sigh of relief, he unceremoniously found where he had been trying to go for five minutes.
“Ow!” Karma winced and dug her nails into Brian’s shoulders as he gained entry. Ow, ow, ow! Damn! Was it supposed to hurt this much? She’d read somewhere that a girl’s first time could hurt, but she hadn’t expected this kind of pain. In the movies, women usually looked like they were enjoying this, but there was nothing enjoyable about what Brian was doing to her. At all.
Brian bucked and looked like he was having a seizure as he began hammering away, and it felt like it, too. Her poor vagina. Would she even be able to walk tomorrow? God, what was he doing?
“Oh, uh-huh. Good…yes…is it good for you?” Brian was like an overly excited jackrabbit, and he spouted words in a way that sounded foreign on his tongue, as if he’d heard them in a movie—maybe the same ones she’d seen where the women actually enjoyed having sex—and thought he was supposed to say them.
Karma held on to his spasming body and tried to nod. “Yes.” It wouldn’t help to tell him the truth that this was the worst kind of pain she had ever felt, except for that time when she fell and cut her leg on a jagged rock poking out of the ground. But even that had lasted only a few seconds. This pain had gone on for almost a minute already, and it was getting worse.
Brian’s eyes were closed, so he couldn’t see the distress on Karma’s face as he continued bruising her tender flesh with his penis of death. “Yes, so good…I can’t stop…Karma…oh…oh…uh-huh…there…” Brian huffed, puffed, and made like a giant jumping bean as he pounded her fragile flesh even harder.
OOOOWWWW!
Her back and hip bones ground against the floor, and white-hot pain seared her insides. She wanted it to be over. Just hurry up already and be done. This shit hurt.
In less than two minutes from start to finish, Brian’s body began to jerk. His breathing intensified and his animalistic grunts rose on a crescendo. Then he slammed his hips into her and fell into epileptic shudders. A long, ragged exhale poured from his open mouth. Then he collapsed on top of her. Done.
Thank God.
Afterward, Karma had stared at the water spot on the ceiling, numb, with flames licking the inside of her vagina as Brian remained on top of her, gasping for air. But the pain had been a small price to pay for achieving a rite of passage.
“I’d begun to think I would never have sex,” she said, coming to the end of the story. “But there, on Brian’s living room, with Godzilla roaring from the TV and cold pizza on the coffee table, I finally did it. I lost my virginity.” When she finished, she glanced at Mark, who had grown so quiet it was almost as if he weren’t there.
“That was your first time?”
She nodded and looked down at her hands, but not before she saw a flash of emotion pass through his eyes.
“Did the two of you have sex again after that?”
“A few more times.”
“Did it get better?”
“No, not really. It didn’t hurt as much, but it was always rapid-fire fast, like he didn’t want to get caught or something.”
“And you never had an orgasm?” Mark watched her closely, as if he were taking each of her answers and building a file in his head.
“No.”
“And how many lovers have you had since Brian?”
She knew Mark already understood there hadn’t been many, and now was the moment of truth.
“I’d like to say none, but there was one more, but I don’t really count him.”
Mark’s eyes narrowed briefly, and he tilted his head slightly to one side. “Why not?”
“Because we only did it once.”
“Only once? Was that your choice or his?”
“His, but after I found out why, it was mine, too.”
Concern etched the lines of Mark’s face as he shifted on the couch. He appeared both worried and concerned, as if he wanted to know what happened but wasn’t sure he should ask.
“Richard was an ass,” she said, making the decision for him. “He only wanted one thing, and I was too gullible at the time to know that. He seduced me, and I use that term lightly, because all he wanted was sex.”
“How did you know him?”
“He was part of the crowd Daniel and I hung out with in college for a while. He got to know me, and after a couple of ‘dates’…” she made air quotes with her fingers, “we had sex.”
Mark sat forward. “Did you want to?”
“At the time, I thought I did, because, like I said, he seduced me. He told me how much he liked me, and how alike we were, and how he knew from the moment we met that I was special. Blah, blah, blah.”
Mark chuffed. “He didn’t seduce you. He lied so he could use you.” He sounded disgusted, and didn’t that just make him seem like her knight in shining armor.
“Yes, I figured that out the hard way.” Silence stretched between them for several seconds. “A few weeks later, I learned that was Richard’s MO. He moved in, targeted girls who were shy and quiet, then did his thing.”
Mark pressed his lips together and his face grew tight, but he didn’t voice whatever frustration she could tell sat on the tip of his tongue. A moment later, he said, “I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault,” she said.
“I made you think about it.”
She smiled. “I’m pretty tough. I can handle it.”
He gestured toward the cards. “If you want to stop playing, we can—”
“No, I want to continue.”
“You’re sure?”
“Positive.” Talking about all this was strangely freeing. She felt like she was molting, shedding old layers of herself to reveal more of the woman within.
He sighed and sat back. “Okay then, it’s your turn. Pick a card and ask me a question.”
She could tell that, at some point, Richard would come up again, even if only in passing or indirectly.
“Okay,” she said, picking up a card. She snickered when she read it. “This is a good one. What’s the most flexible sex move you can do? Tell me why it’s awesome?” She emphasized awesome even though it wasn’t emphasized on the card.
Mark burst into laughter. “What? Seriously?” He grabbed the card and read it to himself.
Karma laughed, which was a nice change from the oh-so-serious line of questioning she had just endured. And maybe channeling all that seriousness was why she and Mark both continued laughing a little too hard for several seconds.
“I can’t say that I have any flexible sex moves,” he said, flicking the card toward the table. It fluttered and spun on the air before gliding to the floor. “Unlike you, I don’t do yoga. I think I’d break something if I tried to get flexible. Ask me another,” he said. “I didn’t like that one and can’t answer it, anyway. Besides, I owe you after that last round of questioning.”
She snagged the next card on the stack. “Would you rather be lightly spanked in bed or have a feather run softly over your whole body?”
“Mmm.” Mark sank into the cushions and looked up at the ceiling. “Definitely the feather. Or maybe hair.” He turned his
eyes on her. “I like a woman’s hair to glide down my chest and stomach.”
There was only one time a woman’s hair would glide down his chest and stomach, and that was if she was taking her mouth down there. So, yeah, this game had just taken an interesting turn.
“Has anyone ever used a feather on you?”
He licked his lips. “Once or twice.”
Her mind took the next logical step. “Have you ever used a feather on anyone?”
His single dimple dug into his right cheek. “Once or twice.”
“And…?”
“It can be very pleasurable,” he said. “Perhaps I’ll show you sometime.” Before she could say anything further, he grabbed the next card on the deck. “My turn.” He read it to himself first. “What’s the first thing that pops into your head when I say oral?” He lowered the card and gave her a slightly wicked smile. There was no doubt where his mind had gone.
And considering where her thoughts had just been a minute ago with the whole hair-on-his-body idea, her mind had gone there, too, because her first thought was of giving Mark a blow job. But no way was she going to say that, especially when she had never given one. There had to be a law that stated if you’d never given a blow job, you couldn’t use the term.
“Hygiene!” she said a little too forcefully.
His left eyebrow rose as he narrowed his eyes. “Why don’t I believe you?”
She shrugged and quickly picked up another card, trying to hurry ahead before he could entrap her into another long line of questioning that was sure to embarrass her. “Have you ever been aroused at work? Give me details.”
“Yes,” he said. “I have been aroused at work. Very recently in fact.” He sat forward and leveled her with a look that held enough steam to hard boil an egg. “Friday, when I suggested that you unbutton your blouse, and when you did…?” His gaze swept her face, and a wistful smile played over his mouth. “That really turned me on.”
Oh wow, okay, so…uh-huh. The game was definitely getting more interesting.
He held her gaze for a long moment then picked up the next card as he cleared his throat. His smile brightened as he read the question to himself. “I like this one,” he said. “I can’t wait to hear your answer.” He looked up, eyes twinkling. “What physical trait of mine first caught your eye?”
Way to put her on the spot. She pressed her lips together, thought about it for a second, and tried to envision him sitting beside her at the blackjack table. She had turned toward him, and a split second before she looked at his face, she saw his hands. He had rugged, sure hands. The kind that when they held you made you feel like you were really being held. She hadn’t known that at the time, but she’d found out soon enough.
“Your hands,” she said definitively.
“My hands.” He glanced at them.
“Yes. Then your eyes, then your mouth, and then your chest when we were dancing.”
A glimmer of recollection crossed his face. “Ah, yes, I remember.” He grinned, making her blush as she recalled feeling him up. “You did seem a little taken with my chest at one point.”
Looking down, she forced herself not to laugh. “I guess you caught that.”
“Mm-hm. It was cute how you reacted when I caught you, too.”
She sighed. “Okay, you can stop embarrassing me now.”
He laughed and settled into the cushions again. “Are you a chest woman?”
“A chest woman?” She frowned in confusion. “What’s a chest woman?”
“You know how some men are leg men, some are boob men, stuff like that. Are you a woman who likes men’s chests? Do they turn you on?”
“I never thought about it that way, but yes, I guess so. I also seem to notice a man’s arms and his hands, too.” She gestured toward his. “Obviously, since that was the first part of you I noticed. Hmm…chests, arms, hands, shoulders. I guess I’m more of an overall upper body kind of gal.”
“I see.” The file he was building on her sounded like it had just grown a bit more interesting, much like the conversation.
She snagged the next card before she could dork out any more than she already had then almost choked as she read the question. “Do you think toe sucking is totally hot or really gross?” She started laughing. Toe sucking? Really? Who came up with these questions?
“Totally hot, for sure,” he said without hesitation, cutting off her thoughts.
Karma’s mouth fell open. “What? Really?”
He nodded emphatically. “Oh God, yes.” He glanced down at her sneakered feet. “I’m what is called a foot man.” As evidence, he lifted hers and unlaced her sneakers without pulling them off, even though it looked as though it took all his willpower not to as he caressed her ankles. “I thought you would have figured that out already. I haven’t done a very good job hiding my interest in your feet.”
She remembered how he’d looked at them last Friday at the department store, how he’d moaned just a little, and how he’d seemed so affected when he’d told her she had beautiful feet, but the thought had never occurred to her that there were men in the world who got turned on by feet or that he was one of them. Discovering this little nugget about Mark was like finding a chunk of gold in her carpet, and his reasoning for asking her to wear the black peep-toe pumps to the concert suddenly made more sense. Finally, this game had given her something she could slip into her mental Mark file.
“You mean, if I took off my shoes right now…” She gently pushed her toe against the heel of one sneaker so that it pushed halfway off her foot. His eyes instantly flared as he dropped his gaze. “Does this distract you?” She grinned daringly as the vixen side of her personality shoved her conservative persona into the shadows.
He moaned and laid his head back, taking a heavy breath. Then he cast her a warning glance. “Yes, that distracts me.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” she said as innocently as she could muster as she began to tuck her foot back into her shoe. “I’ll just put my shoe back on and—”
He grabbed her foot and pulled off her sneaker. “No. Don’t.” His heated gaze raked her face. “Please.” He dropped her sneaker to the floor, pulled off the other, and dropped it as well. “If you don’t mind, I’d like you to keep your shoes off.” His breathing sounded labored, as if he was forcing himself to calm down, and his eyelids drooped, giving him a sexy, drowsy appeal.
His expression lit something primitive and debased in the pit of her stomach. “My feet really turn you on that much?”
He blinked heavily, and as if he were holding a sacred gift, he lifted her right leg by the ankle, opened his legs, and nestled the sole of her foot against his crotch. He was hard. Very hard. An airy moan broke in his throat. “Yes. Your feet really turn me on that much.” He took a heavy breath and blew it out like he was trying to meditate. Then he swallowed and, holding her sole against him, leaned over and picked up a card. “Your turn.” He took a moment to compose himself then read the question. “Which do you think is hotter: sex standing against a wall or bent over a table?”
Karma had never done either, so how could she answer honestly? “I don’t know.”
“Let me guess, you have no experience with either way, right?” He still sounded sexually bent but a bit calmer.
She bit her lip and nodded.
“Does one sound more interesting than the other?”
She thought about it for a moment then shook her head. “Not really.”
Mark grinned as if making a mental note. “Well, we’ll just have to help you figure that out, won’t we?”
Gulp.
“I guess.” She grabbed the next card. It certainly was getting warm in here, especially with her foot still pressed to his erection. After reading the card to herself, this next question wasn’t going to cool things off, either. “On a scale of one to ten, how sensitive are your…uh…your nipples?” The words caught in her throat, and she coughed before reading the second half of the question. “How would you like me to…
um…touch them?” She slowly lifted her gaze.
He looked like a wolf ready to devour her.
“My nipples are pretty sensitive, so I’ll say about an eight or nine.” His voice had grown deeper. “I like when a woman touches them or licks them. Or bites them.” He cleared his throat and shifted on the couch, making her foot rub down the hard length of him. “And you have sexy teeth.”
“Sexy teeth?”
He nodded. “Oh yes. Very sexy. I want you to do naughty things to me with your teeth. No drawing blood or anything like that, but…”
She felt light-headed. “No, of course not.”
“It’s just that…” He licked his lips. “I like the idea of your mouth on me, Karma.”
And she liked the idea of his on her.
Mark waited a moment before grabbing the next card from the deck. The corner of his mouth ticked upward. Oh boy, this was going to be a good one. She could just tell.
“Describe exactly what it feels like when you orgasm.”
Thud!
“Um, well…” She exhaled heavily through pursed lips, making her cheeks puff out.
Mark set down the card and casually sat back, waiting for her answer, a patient smile on his face.
“Okay, so…” Her fingers twisted in her lap. “You already know I’ve never had an orgasm during…um…sex.”
“From what you’ve told me, I assumed that was the case. But you have had an orgasm, haven’t you?”
If she said yes, she would be admitting to masturbation, and something about that felt too personal.
“Karma,” he said, his voice lilting as he rocked himself against her foot. “Do you give yourself pleasure?”
“Oh hell,” she said, huffing as she rolled her eyes. “Fine. Yes. Yes I do. God, this is so embarrassing.”
“And…what does it feel like?”
She set her jaw and slapped her hands on her thighs. “Good, okay? It feels good.”
He threw his head back and laughed so hard his whole body shook. “Fine, I’ll take that. But…” He held up his index finger as if making a point. “An orgasm you give yourself rarely feels as good as one someone else gives you, and almost never as good as one you have during sex.”
