by Emma Knox
“So many reasons to stay in Juneau.” I was lost in the background of it. Sean was studying the menu like a difficult maths test. “Do you like it out here?”
“I wouldn’t pass through it so often if I didn’t. Juneau reminds me of California’s colder cousin. But when I hit Anchorage I find I still can’t compare the two. I think it has a community worth working with.”
“It has that small vibe to it. I wouldn’t leave it now.”
“Even after all that happened?”
“Home is home. And yeah, it can be daunting to face it in the dark, but when the sun rises again I’m reminded that it can be quite beautiful.”
Sean’s gaze slowly dropped from me after that. I reckoned what I said touched him.
“My philosophy of life has been to ride until you get sick of it. Being a mechanic wasn’t my family’s first choice, but they knew I was good with my hands and had a mouth to get the business booming wherever I roamed. California is me…it has my tag and I wear it proud.”
“Your problem is, you think Alaska is nothing like California.”
“It isn’t! California is the boss! Alaska is where you come to emigrate and settle down. Settling down is the flu to me.”
“You don’t mean that, Sean?”
He scoffed pleasantly. “Maybe.” Then he looked up at me. “Who knows what comes along and makes you think of alternatives.”
I looked to the menu to avoid that gaze. “You said I was a looker?”
“You are! And you have a wicked sense of humour!”
I smiled to myself. “What more could an Alpha want in an Omega?”
Sean sniffed the air. “I know I’d want the Omega to feel safe and secure when it’s carrying something quite precious.”
That was kind of Sean to say. It was just his sniffing of my corrupted glands that irritated me. I was pregnant, so it couldn’t be helped. But I hoped it wasn’t clouding his judgement and forcing him to be a nice guy.
“What was your kid like?”
That caught me off guard, and I had to glare at him for a few seconds.
“Sorry if it’s to nosey to enquire about?”
“Not nosey.” I closed the menu like a finished book. “I wasn’t expecting you to even want to know about the deeper parts of me.”
“We’re on a date and getting to know each other is the norm that happens. Was he like you?”
“What do you mean?”
“An accountant.”
I scoffed at Sean and he grinned at his own sense of humour.
“If you mean, was he smart? Then yes. For his age I thought Lucas could be anything he wanted to be. He was a kid who had an inner prospective about things: I never knew what he was thinking.”
“He must’ve taken that from you?”
I gave a tight-mouthed grin at that. I hadn’t spoken about my son for a very long time. And the fact that Sean and I were speaking about him was bringing me back to how much he resembled both me and his dad. I left the visual of my husband and child standing at the front door waving…and replied to the waiter that was now standing above me and Sean with a notepad to take our orders. “I’ll have a steak.”
“Bloody, or well done?”
I noticed Sean salivating all over when the guy mentioned bloody.
“I’ll go for bloody—”
“Good choice!” That pleased him. “I’ll have the same with some red wine soaked as an extra addition.”
“Ok.” We waited for the guy to scribble that all down. “Would you like any drinks?”
“Can we have two glasses of your finest wine?”
I laughed when Sean said that. It was hilarious because the waiter must’ve thought he’s a real character to be ordering wine and looking like he’d prefer a beer in the local park.
“What’s so funny, Robbie?”
“I just want a cold drink. The fine wine can be left to the side.”
“Oh. Then I’ll have two orange juices.” The waiter took that down and left us alone. “They sell some nice wine here.”
“I know. But wine isn’t your thing so just be yourself.”
“I am!”
A few other customers heard that as they entered the restaurant.
“No need to yell it out for me. I’m right here.”
“I’m being myself. Do you think I’m not?”
I rubbed my stomach and Sean flinched.
“Is this tiny bump making the conversation difficult?”
“Not at all. An orange juice is better, you’re right.”
Sean went into this happy sulk. “What’s your honest opinion of me so far?”
I laid my hand flat on the table and he noticed that. “You’re like a flat pancake: sweet but could use a little more sugar.”
Sean didn’t like that. “Ah, I hate the word sweet”
“Would you prefer…ass-hole?”
“Well, ass-hole has a more boyish touch to it.”
“Trust me, Sean. If you were an unbearable ass-hole I wouldn’t be sitting here with you. You’re nice enough. Just your individualist speech could drive any Omega crazy! How has any past relationship been able to cope with you?”
“There was never a baby involved—”
“Not the point! All I read from you is unattached and pending until further notice.”
The waiter came with our juices, and Sean was getting up to go to the loo. It left me with some time to think on how this date was going. I got up and stretched my legs: hearing the talk from the smokers on the Alaskan community meeting that was still unresolved. That was the talk of the town and on everybody’s lips. The restaurant started to get busy and I wanted to move us to a more secluded spot. I wanted him to myself, and I was enjoying the time so far.
When Sean came back out I had already asked to move, but he was leaving the restaurant asking for a cigarette that never came into his fingertips because everybody was wrapped up in their own worlds.
“Got somewhere better to be?”
Sean flipped around surprised to see me. “I just wanted to smoke.”
“Do you actually smoke?” I squinted with confusion because I’d never seen him with one.
“I quit a few years back and it’s like a nicotine to me: reminding myself that if I ask for a cigarette then I’m likely to refuse the per—”
“Did you ask for a cigarette?”
“No. That was the guy before me.”
“Oh ok.” The Beta walked off, and I stood in amazement that Sean made sense with that one. He then went back to the table with a wink at me.
“I wanted us to move up there by the bar. We’d still be outside.”
“Why? Here’s fine.”
“I just thought it was getting a little noisy down here.”
He remained standing, “I’m easy going. We can go up there if you like.”
“We can stay here…our foods coming out now so maybe it’s best we just sit.”
The food was good, but Sean’s company was tastier. Even with all chitter-chatter going on we still stayed glued to our own occupied space. He did the disappearing act a few times and stood by the smoker’s hub just to mingle with the second-hand smoking, then came back with his bloodstream a happy-chappy and his mood improved. “That guy I was speaking with was a Beta and he knows Mark. He says my cousin is really the fire behind the Beta cause in so many ways.”
“Does that make you proud?”
“Well you know I’m not much into politics. But if he’s making a positive impact around here, then me as a mechanic can see why it’s a good thing.”
“I’m glad you said that. It shows me your mind isn’t as stubborn as you make out.”
“Don’t get too comfortable with my changing winds.”
“I won’t. Did you enjoy the steak?”
“I asked for bloody—”
“And that’s what you got?”
“Yeah. But not bloody hard!”
I got out my seat for that one.
“You go
ing to make a bigger scene?”
“I wanted to applaud your comedic spirit with a handclap.”
Sean stopped me from embarrassing him.
“Everybody in this restaurant should learn about how funny you truthfully are.”
“To see you laughing and smiling means I’ve done pretty well then? I haven’t seen you so relaxed.”
I sat back down. “Your company is a fresh air spray.”
“Am I a good scent?”
“One that Juneau could use.”
Sean shut up with that one. “Let’s not speak about that.” He placed his hand down on the table and I wanted to reach out to him for some affection. The night was moving to the point where we would need to decide what next. “I’ve been selfish for so long that it’s hard to believe that I’m sticking this out until the end. I never used to.”
“Were you a serial dater?”
“We’d arrange the date and I’d show up to it late. Nothing to do with them. I just wanted the message clear that I was never on time.”
None of that mattered to me in the long run. Since my husband, no Alpha had the potential that Sean possessed. And the more I observed his sluggish but content ways, was the more I felt the cracks of my solitude heal. Deep down, no Alpha or Omega wants to be alone. And after all these years that was confirmed in my own journey. Sean was the next inclination and I wondered if fate gave me another way out?
What I picked up about Sean was his own devices of dealing with his preferred isolation. Were we really that different? When I went to find the waiter to pay the bill that’s the only fiddle that played for me. And he even, as a joke, brushed past me and took my card before I entered in my pin. The waiter smiled when he brandished his card and paid for it all instead.
Then we hung around the bar just to observe what drinks they had. And I found, only now, that I wanted to place my hand in his and see if it fit. Like finding the right sized shoe. I gave it a test and Sean didn’t recoil his hand away from me. He held his in my own. And I counted down from five…four…three…two…one, and then removed it myself because my comfort level was now peaking into stimulation in my groin.
I was becoming as aroused the more I glimpsed Sean’s frame, but it was not just his body that got me going. No, I found that we were two ends on a scale and it was balancing itself out. Sean brought a bottle for the road and then tipped the waiter who was more than happy to mention our returning would be valued.
Sean asked for a cigarette just as we were about to leave — and refused it in the same light. The Alpha found that it was a nice little trick and asked Sean if he could use that himself? “I charge.”
The Alpha took it seriously, but Sean was already crossing the road and making the journey to his motorbike. The night was a nice once, no exaggeration, and Sean hopping on his bike was rimming with sex appeal.
“Where to now?” He kindly offered me a helmet.
“I’ll let you choose that.”
Sean grinned boyishly. And I thought that the universe was giving me a second chance at love because the emotion was tingling in my whole body. We shall see. We shall see.
Chapter 10
Sean
Robbie gave me the choice, and I smelt that it would end back at his place! The odour of his arousal was the strongest I’d ever penned on an Omega. There was research suggesting that the more attracted an Omega got to an Alpha, the more his scent intensified. And that’s what propelled me to drive back to his place with no care for the road.
But with Robbie being super cautious I had to slow down and be careful. And plus, he was carrying a heavy embryo in there, so he had the right. I enjoyed the date more than I should have. It scared me plenty of times, and my usual curtain call would be to duck after entering the bathroom; visit the bar; grab a bottle; and then leave without saying goodbye.
At least ten times I was in the mind frame to just up-and-leave, but some invisible force kept grinding me back with my sneaks glued back to Robbie’s table. And when I would see his face it filled with an uncertain happiness that was equivalent to voyaging through California.
Robbie was a piece of sunshine to me. We just had this boom-bye-yes compatibility with each other. He was older, but didn’t take himself too seriously, even after all that had happened to him. And I was just Sean, getting by with my day-to-day and ending up where I saw fit.”
That fitting was en-route to his place, but I stopped off near a lake and wanted to just take Juneau in with twelve-o-clock looming on the radar. “Why’d you stop?”
“No hurry to get back, is there?”
“Yes!”
I knew that yes was reaching the exact same spot…and I didn’t mean my elbow.
“Come on, Sean, it’s cold out here!”
“The temperature is nice tonight. It’s been the warmest since I’ve been out here.”
“Great. Fantastic. But can we go back to my place for a coca?”
I stood watching the lake sparkle under the moonlight. I was sure I saw a few fish swimming along. “I promised myself I would do a midnight view alone.” I could barely see Robbie in the dark, but he was looking in my direction. “And yet, here I am stopping off near this fine-looking lake and I have company.”
Robbie got off the bike to join me. “You’re showing me your romantic side?”
“No, I’m not.”
“Sean, this is reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal romantic. It makes me want to stop and kiss you—”
“Then kiss me—”
“I’d rather do that at home and make our way to the bedroom—”
“Why not start by the lake and ignite that fire?”
“Very smooth.” It was. And it was out of context too.
But we kissed…or Robbie kissed me first and I took hold of his back and kept my lips upon his for as long as he did. When we departed I found he held back from any cheek stroking or biting his bottom lip to arouse me. I wanted to kiss him again, but he moved from me and created a space so that we became strangers. I knew what the lake represented for me, but what did it represent for Robbie?
When we got back on my cruiser, I was still thinking of the lake, and the idea that in the past when I stopped, I saw that I was the boat that loved to travel the vastness that never had any ending. Now when I looked, I saw that the boat was settling above with no idea what way to go.
Robbie was holding me tighter than the last time I had him on the bike. And he was comfortable with me. His touch had changed, and I could feel him trying not to snooze off. I kept jabbing him gently to keep awake. “Don’t lose the buzz.”
“I’m not sleeping. But I know you’re taking a very long time to get back.”
“I like having you leaning on me like that. It’s doing wonders for my libido.”
“Is my touch that powerful?”
“Robbie, I’m like…one step away from crashing this bike because you’re getting me all hot and bothered, baby!” I shouted to ignite some fun into the air. “Robbie’s got me wanting to strip!” And those words were executed even louder as the sound of my cruiser kept on rolling.
“Watch the road!” Robbie was squeezing me in fear.
I just wanted to shout some more. But I didn’t because we were reaching his neighbourhood and sleepers got to sleep. I parked up and put down the stabilizer: the bike slanted and me and Robbie got off.
“You seriously are crazy!”
“When we get in there I can show you the kind of crazy I like to entrap.”
“You don’t want to shower or anything first?”
“Hey, when it comes to getting down and dirty I like to do it freshly out the oven! If you can handle that smell, I think we should respect that.”
Robbie thought about it, or more like teased me into lowering my eyes to scale down to his lower back and beyond. He was already unbuttoning his shirt before opening the front door with his key. I did the same and took off my jacket and threw it over my arm. Then when we reached indoors, I threw it across the banister a
nd saw Robbie making his way upstairs and then stopping mid-way.
“You going to join me?”
I start to remove my own v-neck t-shirt. “Try whistling for me to come up?”
Robbie whistled the lowest whistle I had ever heard in my life! But it timed with the removal of my t-shirt, and then when I came up after him he started to unbuckle his belt and let that leather and metal drop onto the stairs. I got a full glimpse, and it was hardening the sailor within me.
He got to the top stair and then put out his palm to stop me. I watched as Robbie slowly withdrew that button from the hole and then zipped down until I gulped for him to let me see those trousers drop. When they hit the carpet, I was down on my knees and giving him a palm-shine because I wanted to get that bulge growing as fast as mine was.
The shine I gave Robbie warmed up the relay, but he stopped me, and then placed his left hand down his pants and I backed up enough to see him working that moan that came gradually with each stroke-stroke-stroke-stroke-stroke. I was turning redder than a beetroot, and Robbie was moving to his bedroom that was the room adjacent to the bathroom.
I got up from my knees: glued to his caressing that had me doing the same on my groin. We were both competing to see who would moan the loudest! Robbie placed on the light in his room and caught me kicking off my trousers with only my boxers remaining. It was now me and Robbie: four yards apart and glaring at the eyes and crotch area.
My eyes were becoming heavy with lust, and Robbie was finding that his increased speed needed to fall back to the tenderness of the moment. He sat on the edge of the bed and I was now there with his head at the same level of my navel.
In a sensual voice I heard, “Take those off.”
And without a moment’s hesitation my boxers dropped, and I covered my crotch to tease him.
Robbie gently brushed my hand away, but I put it back. He did it again…and with my stubbornness I used both palms to cover my balls. It managed to get Robbie up with his stroke-preening that stopped! But that was my plan, because I wanted to put my tongue in his mouth and really slap every single molar and canine that I could find. We lizard kiss to the point where Robbie pulled away and glared at me in the eye before sticking his tongue out at me.
