by Aimee Horton
Dottie Harris is not happy about the new obsession with The Power Rangers. According to The Monster, her Samurai skills are in need of some work :(
June 25, 2012 at 11:08
8 people like this
Dottie Harris is taking The Monster for his first school settling in tomorrow and is wondering if he can make it through the whole session without shooting web at the teachers.
June 26, 2012 at 19:57
23 people like this
Dottie Harris is enjoying this beautiful summer’s da … oh.
June 28, 2012 at 11:39
6 people like this
Dottie Harris has just discovered just how sore a loser she is after losing Pirate Pursuit legitimately.
July 1, 2012 at 16:29
5 people like this
Dottie Harris has finally determined that when The Monster said he was “resigning” from pre-school he actually meant graduating.
July 2, 2012 at 10:19
9 people like this
Dottie Harris would like to point out to The Monster that even if you don't like the school uniform you still have to wear it, and no, Spider-Man suits aren't a better substitute.
July 5, 2012 at 17:56
5 people like this
Dottie Harris is very much looking forward to putting an over tired Green Gogglin to bed.
July 5, 2012 at 18:49
6 people like this
Dottie Harris has the kids in bed, 7pm on the dot. Now for wine, STAT!
July 5, 2012 at 19:01
5 people like this
Dottie Harris has just been informed that The Monster wants a Ben10 party NOT Spider-Man. The only thing which can describe her current emotion is GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
July 10, 2012 at 11:23
4 people like this
Dottie Harris would like to thank tea for helping her get through a particularly stressful episode of Postman Pat. Not sure who will win the race but excited about the final moral to the story!
July 15, 2012 at 7:35
11 people like this
Dottie Harris has just been informed by The Monster that he is “Fed up of putting up with my sister.”
July 15, 2012 at 18:45
14 people like this
Dottie Harris went to the farm without the pushchair today. She now needs a takeaway and a gin to recover from THAT 3 stone work out.
July 17, 2012 at 19:19
18 people like this
Dottie Harris has just had to break up a bite fight followed by breaking out the Savlon. Bad times.
July 21, 2012 at 9:23
5 people like this
Dottie Harris would like to apologise to the couple in the pub for the Ben10 water camera incident.
July 22, 2012 at 17:55
6 people like this
Dottie Harris really doesn't want to hear “Hello, Puppy calling..." ever again.
July 23, 2012 at 7:54
9 people like this
Dottie Harris is enjoying having her coffee without constant narrative.
July 25, 2012 at 14:08
3 people like this
Dottie Harris is regretting downloading "Let's Get Ready to Rumble" for the kids. Five replays in a row and it's starting to grate.
July 26, 2012 at 18:38
3 people like this
Dottie Harris really wishes her daughter would stop beating her son up.
July 29, 2012 at 17:21
2 people like this
Dottie Harris has just realised she's been wearing Ben10 socks IN PUBLIC all day.
July 29, 2012 at 20:47
5 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks it's too early in the day to be hunting for lost pirate patches.
July 30, 2012 at 6:19
4 people like this
Dottie Harris isn't that fond of the name “Mummy" right now.
August 1, 2012 at 20:01
3 people like this
Dottie Harris has been jumped on by the heaviest toddler in the world. Winded doesn't cover it!
August 2, 2012 at 8:01
6 people like this
Dottie Harris has just been hit on the face by a slice of toast. Nutella side up.
August 3, 2012 at 8:32
8 people like this
Dottie Harris really does not appreciate there being fat toddler poo on her sofa.
August 4, 2012 at 15:26
7 people like this
Dottie Harris totally isn't broody after cuddling a GORGEOUS laughing baby. She also can't repeat what her husband said when she used the phrase “What harm would one more do?".
August 5, 2012 at 19:11
12 people like this
Dottie Harris is doing frantic Amazon party decor buying.
August 6, 2012 at 10:01
2 people like this
Dottie Harris has a super excited 4 year old! Happy birthday, little man. Glad we’ve managed to keep you alive another year x
August 7, 2012 at 6:04
29 people like this
Dottie Harris is armed with gin and setting to creating a Spider-Man themed party.
August 8, 2012 at 19:36
6 people like this
Dottie Harris is thinking a cardboard box rocket with a blanket roof is rather hot work on a sunny day.
August 10, 2012 at 11:21
3 people like this
Dottie Harris didn't realise how quickly wax crayons melted in a conservatory before she sat on a ready melted one in her new dress.
August 10, 2012 at 15:01
4 people like this
Dottie Harris is witnessing a particularly bad case of man flu. The Monster "can't walk" as his "whole body hurts". THREE insect bites are the cause. Give.Me.Strength.
August 13, 2012 at 11:01
7 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks that when she says to The Monster “Flush the toilet please" she does not want the response to be "NO, YOU DO IT OR I WILL PUT YOU IN IT". Bar is open.
August 13, 2012 at 19:08
4 people like this
Dottie Harris is slightly embarrassed that she's the only parent at crazy golf who not only requested a score card but is keeping actual score.
August 14, 2012 at 14:23
13 people like this
Dottie Harris is having a cup of tea. She's in bed, it's still hot, it's quiet and nobody has dribbled milk into her nose. Thanks Mum x
August 17, 2012 at 7:54
9 people like this
Dottie Harris is hiding in the kitchen "putting stuff away" to avoid a sandy bath time after a lovely day at the beach!
August 18, 2012 at 18:43
6 people like this
Dottie Harris is still unconvinced by yellow nail varnish.
August 18, 2012 at 20:21
3 people like this
Dottie Harris dislikes Mondays. High (low) point so far is being stuck on top of a chest of drawers as the stool used to get up there is now being used as a birthday cake. Having to blow out the candles and eat the cake to get down was the final straw. Send gin!
August 20, 2012 at 9:53
16 people like this
Dottie Harris has never seen anybody carry a sword in a flowery shopping bag, but according to The Monster that's how it's done.
August 24, 2012 at 15:08
5 people like this
Dottie Harris is glad her daughter felt the need to get up and shout at her 6 times last night. After all, too much sleep makes for a lazy Mummy. *sob*
August 25, 2012 at 7:25
3 people like this
Dottie Harris really wishes she hadn't discovered 24 on Netflix. ADDICT.
August 26, 2012 at 23:51
10 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks that you know it's been a busy Bank Holiday when you end up with two sobbing kids in the bath. Time for gin and potentially more melted cheese.
August 27, 2012 at 19:13
9 people like this
; Dottie Harris really wishes that Lego police vans didn't hurt so much when driven over her face at 6.30am.
August 28, 2012 at 6:48
6 people like this
Dottie Harris just nipped upstairs after tucking the kids into bed, and has discovered The Chubster in the lounge flicking through the TV channels. Locks on doors are ok, yes?
August 28, 2012 at 19:23
11 people like this
Dottie Harris isn't thinking about the two slices of cherry pie in the fridge. Especially NOT when they could be teamed with a hot chocolate.
August 29, 2012 at 11:02
4 people like this
Dottie Harris is very pleased that when she asked The Chubster what she wanted to do this afternoon she said go shopping for home furnishings and storage solutions. *cough*
September 1, 2012 at 14:54
6 people like this
Dottie Harris is amazed how warm croissants and a pot of tea make everything alright. Except the fact she is now obviously 70.
September 2, 2012 at 8:19
5 people like this
Dottie Harris was meant to be practicing the whole "getting up on time for school" thing today. She failed.
September 3, 2012 at 8:47
2 people like this
Dottie Harris has just heard The Monster say “Stop being a naughty scoundrel" to Batman. As you do.
September 3, 2012 at 10:12
7 people like this
Dottie Harris - Day 2 of attempting practice. Husband says “What? I have to get up at 7am as well?”. There are no words.
September 4, 2012 at 7:03
3 people like this
Dottie Harris has dropped her big boy at school *wahhh*
September 5, 2012 at 9:14
19 people like this
Dottie Harris is pleased to report that The Monster had an amazing day, has been "excellent" and is "so well behaved". He also wasn't that filthy!
September 5, 2012 at 16:08
27 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks that The Monster has left his "he's SOOO good and cute" personality at school with the doting teacher and had brought the "he's a horrible little toad" one home with him. Send help!
September 6, 2012 at 15:54
4 people like this
Dottie Harris *must* remember to wash school uniforms.
September 9, 2012 at 18:39
2 people like this
Dottie Harris is wondering at what age it's feasible to suggest The Monster gets himself up, ready and off to school.
September 10, 2012 at 6:34
9 people like this
Dottie Harris is baffled by the skill of a child who hates fruit and veg. Eating all the omelette and not a bite of peppers.
September 10, 2012 at 12:26
5 people like this
Dottie Harris is disappointed that her change of hair cut and colour didn't disguise her enough to stop the teachers sending the children home with her.
September 11, 2012 at 16:01
6 people like this
Dottie Harris was slightly embarrassed explaining to his teachers that the reason The Monster didn't want to come into school today was because it “is boring".
September 12, 2012 at 9:08
5 people like this
Dottie Harris is amazed it took as long as a week for the big blue eyes to work. The Monster has convinced the teachers at school that he needs feeding his dinner at lunch time. Well, according to him anyway.
September 12, 2012 at 17:25
2 people like this
Dottie Harris - Two phrases I never thought I'd say: “We don't put buses on people's heads" and “No, the laptop isn't a dog" (as it's dragged across the landing by its USB cable.) Send gin.
September 12, 2012 at 11:47
11 people like this
Dottie Harris is very pleased that her daughter tried to help her by hanging the laundry on the radiators, she just wishes it wasn't the dirty laundry.
September 13, 2012 at 17:12
6 people like this
Dottie Harris is becoming an expert at attending superhero parties. Perhaps it’s time to purchase a She-Ra outfit.
September 14, 2012 at 14:57
9 people like this
Dottie Harris slightly resents sharing her cooked breakfast with the fat child who kept her awake between 12.30pm and 4.30am.
September 15, 2012 at 8:27
1 person likes this
Dottie Harris loves that her husband has ordered her a dirty curry WITHOUT looking for a voucher because he knows just how horrible her day has been. Now that's love.
September 15, 2012 at 20:01
16 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks you know it's not going to be a good nappy situation when you stand in poo which has obviously escaped from said nappy.
September 16, 2012 at 17:59
9 people like this
Dottie Harris has just witnessed her daughter trying to take the easel and chalk box to bed.
September 16, 2012 at 19:16
6 people like this
Dottie Harris could be mistaken as a domestic goddess after her morning in the kitchen, however if you’d look around the corner where The Chubster had been "quietly playing" you’d have found all the dust, fluff and odd socks she’d been fishing out from under the sofa. Just to confirm - we quietly pushed them all back under again for another day.
September 17, 2012 at 11:58
3 people like this
Dottie Harris has invented a new drinking game. Every time she has to split up a fight she takes a shot. Every time she has to tell The Monster not to answer back she takes a shot and every time she has to tell The Chubster to stop climbing the stairgate she takes a shot. Let's hope nobody has a breathalyser at the school gates as we’ve not even had breakfast yet and she’s nearly drunk.
September 18, 2012 at 7:59
5 people like this
Dottie Harris must not go to the gym before having to look after her children on her own. Dealing with a nose bleed when barely able to walk is not easy.
September 18, 2012 at 17:01
3 people like this
Dottie Harris is not enjoying the cold.
September 20, 2012 at 8:55
2 people like this
Dottie Harris has discovered The Chubster taking a bus shape sorter and a baby walker to bed.
September 20, 2012 at 19:34
9 people like this
Dottie Harris is putting her children out with the charity bags.
September 21, 2012 at 7:01
6 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks it may have taken 57 minutes, 23 treks upstairs, confiscation of a fire engine, a bus, a doll, an entire HappyLand toy box, 3 books, a pull along phone and 4 dummies (1 in the mouth, 2 in the eye and 1 "just in case") but The Chubster MAY just have finally gone down for a nap.
September 21, 2012 at 14:21
19 people like this
Dottie Harris spoke to soon.
September 21, 2012 at 14:23
7 people like this
Dottie Harris never thought she'd be grateful for 3 hours of solid sleep but she is.
September 22, 2012 at 6:48
2 people like this
Dottie Harris is losing the “Let's have a 3rd takeaway this week" battle.
September 23, 2012 at 19:13
4 people like this
Dottie Harris shouldn't have pressed the snooze button.
September 26, 2012 at 7:28
6 people like this
Dottie Harris - fail of working for yourself from home: Having to work in the evening due to general family chaos. Bonus of working for yourself from home (in the evening): gin.
September 26, 2012 at 20:09
9 people like this
Dottie Harris has just been told by The Monster that he "blooming well will have cake for tea". Hmm.
September 27, 2012 at 16:47
11 people
like this
Dottie Harris is witnessing a tantrum from hell because she put The Gruffalo's Child on instead of The Gruffalo. Somebody is a *tad* touchy today!
