by Anne Hampson
‘Oh ... how wonderful,’ breathed Loren. ‘What a perfect picture!’
‘He’s mine.’ Dena’s tones vibrated with the desire of possession. ‘Make the most of it, my friend, because you’re about to be tamed.’
Loren shook her head.
‘You can’t!’ she cried, distressed. ‘Don’t - please!’ Smiling suddenly, Dena turned, and stood for a space looking down at Loren.
‘Why not? He doesn’t care a toss for his foal, if that’s what’s troubling you. ’
‘I don’t want him to be captured.’ Loren actually felt tears prick her eyes. ‘Why must you have him, Dena? There are plenty of horses here already.’
‘But not like him. He’s the lord of them all.’ Her head turned and she took in the picture again. The two horses were motionless on the rise, dark against the sky, while the foal, not at all steady on its legs, moved about in search of its mother’s milk.
‘I can’t bear to think of him being broken.’ Loren was not fully aware of the wealth of pleading in her tone as she added,
‘Every time I looked at him I’d see this lovely picture.’
A small silence followed; Loren was conscious of her cousin’s amusement and half expected her to say something, but she remained silent and Dena said at last, with a sort of cheerful resignation,
‘I should have had him brought in when I first saw him. Too late now, obviously.’ She blew a kiss towards the rise. ‘Saved, my snow-white beauty - by the intervention of a softhearted little pommy who thinks you’re happier where you are!’
A swift smile lit Loren’s face.
‘You mean it?’ she asked, and Dena nodded.
‘He’s free, thanks to you.’
‘I’d have him if it were me.’ Janet spoke now, in faintly disparaging tones as her eyes moved from the tableau on the rise to Loren’s happy face. ‘He’s a beauty. If you don’t want him, Dena, then I think I’ll ask Thane to let me have him.’
A profound and uneasy silence followed, with Loren’s face dropping as she and Dena looked at one another.
‘I’d better go to Gran Amelia,’ almost snapped Dena, and disappeared into the house.
‘Thane won’t let you have that horse.’ Loren was the first to break the silence after the rather angry departure of Dena. ‘It wasn’t very nice of you to say you’d have him when Dena had given up her claim on him. ’
Janet leant forward and placed her cup and saucer on the tray.
‘Why shouldn’t I have him? And what makes you think Thane will refuse me? Surely you can see how things are between him and me?’
‘How things are?’ A little of the colour left Loren’s face and something painful caught at her throat. ‘What do you mean?’
A smile that was almost a sneer touched the outline of Janet’s mouth.
‘Oh, it isn’t marriage, if that’s what you’re worrying about. Neither of us wants that sort of net—’
“You are married, Janet,’ Loren could not help reminding
her.
‘Divorce is simple enough these days. However, as I remarked, it isn’t marriage that interests us. We shall most likely have an affair. So much simpler than marriage - and probably more lasting because you don’t feel you’re tied.’
Her lashes fluttered and she regarded Loren with some amusement as she noted the expression of disgust enter her eyes.
‘I don’t believe Thane would have an affair with you,’ Loren said, more colour ebbing from her face. ‘He isn’t that sort of a man. ’
‘Isn’t that sort?’ Janet threw back her head and laughed. ‘All men are that sort.’ Loren said nothing and Janet changed the subject, saying that Thane was flying into Sydney in two days’ time and that she would probably be going with him. Loren remained silent, thinking that had she and Thane still been friendly then undoubtedly it would be her whom he’d have asked to accompany him. ‘I’ve some shopping to do and in any case I’m dying to get into a big town again. I told Thane this and he seems to be most understanding. Always was, though - with me,’ she added significantly, and Loren glanced away, her anger rising just as Dena’s had done a few moments ago.
And just as Dena had made an excuse to leave so Loren did the same, saying she was tired and was going to bed. Thane came from his grandmother’ s room as she was crossing the hall and she bade him a hasty good night.
‘Good night?’ He stopped and Loren had no option than to do the same. ‘You’re going early. Are you tired?’ He examined her face rather anxiously, she thought, before adding, ‘Are you doing too much over there at Ian’s place?’
She shook her head.
‘No, it isn’t hard work, not really. ’
A small silence followed. Thane was close, towering above her, his expression darkly brooding as he gazed down into her eyes. Quite unexpectedly he said,
‘What is it, Loren? What’s happened to bring about this change in you?’
Something in his tone caught at her heartstrings; she had an almost irrepressible desire to move close, to tell him all that was in her heart. Instead, she feigned surprise and said she did not know what he meant. At which his eyes hardened and so did his mouth.
‘Good night,’ she repeated hastily, fearing that they might become involved in a quarrel. ‘I am rather tired,’ she added in reply to his first question.
His jaw flexed and the serpentine eyes darkened with fury. Without a word Thane turned on his heel and strode across the hall towards his study, watched by Loren, whose eyes were blurred suddenly as the conviction spread through her that she had once again handled a situation clumsily. A moment ago Thane had been in a softened mood; he had asked for an explanation and she could quite easily have given him one -have told him the whole truth, that she knew the reason why he had brought her here in the first place. But she had let the opportunity pass, an opportunity which, although it would have resulted in Thane’s being furiously angry that his scheme had been exposed, it would also have cleared the air, putting an end to this impossible situation where both she and Thane were avoiding conversation with one another.
Thane did not, after all, invite Janet to accompany him to Sydney and, Loren suspected, there had never been any question of his doing so. It was mere wishful thinking on Janet’s part, although she had probably believed she could persuade Thane to take her with him. But he had taken Dena and Ian, who were intending to shop around for furniture and other necessities for their home. These would be brought to Melville Downs on a truck which was coming with more equipment for the boring taking place there, the result of a new development in which Thane and his grandmother had played major roles.
It had not surprised Loren when Dena told her that he had offered to help with the expense of the bores, because she recalled his comment that they must see what happened, a comment which seemed cryptic at the time but was now patently clear; but it did surprise Loren when she heard that Gran Amelia was also making a substantial contribution to the cost of the bores.
‘She must think a lot of you,’ Loren had said, and a rueful grin appeared on Dena’s pretty face.
‘I feel a heel, because I’ve called her everything under the sun since first coming here.’
‘You haven’t meant it, though,’ returned Loren with conviction. ‘No one could really dislike Gran Amelia, formidable as she is most of the time.’ The old lady had been almost gentle once, Loren recalled, wondering what had come over Gran Amelia on that occasion.
‘No, you’re quite right,’ agreed Dena pensively. ‘There’s something darned attractive about the old-timer that draws you to her. Thane admits it, although,’ added Dena with a hint of amusement, ‘there must have been numerous occasions when he could have wrung her neck. ’
Thane planned to stay two nights in Sydney and a few moments before he left the house for the airstrip he almost collided with Loren as she came from her bedroom to go down for breakfast, Thane and Dena having taken theirs very early so as to make a good start.
A li
ttle shaken at seeing Thane Loren said with a sort of breathless haste,
‘You’re off? Goodbye th-then.’
His eyes narrowed and his lips snapped together, just as if he were not going to answer her. And then to her amazement she saw the furious colour creep up under his skin and without warning she felt his rough and painful grip on her shoulders before he said, his voice vibrating with anger,
‘Is that all you have to say? And in that impersonal manner? I’ve had enough,’ he rasped before she could recover sufficiently to speak. ‘On my return you and I are going to have a talk. I’m determined to know what this is all about, do you hear?’ His face came close to hers as he stooped. Loren felt the colour drain from her cheeks, for here was the fury
she had always prayed would never be directed against her.
‘I d-don’t know what you m-mean—’ She got no further because words died in her throat as Thane shook her so thoroughly that she started to cry.
‘Be careful,’ he advised in dangerous tones, unmoved by the tears streaming down her face. ‘You paid the penalty once for trying me too far, and if you’re wise you’ll watch your step. I’ll not tolerate any more of your shuffling around the truth - avoiding issues for some damned incomprehensible reason of your own! I intend to know exactly what happened to bring about the change in you, so you’d better have the explanation ready for when I return - ready, do you understand? Otherwise I might subject you to a little persuasion that you’ll find far from pleasant!’ And with that he was gone, taking the wide stairs two at a time.
For a long while Loren stood there, outside her bedroom door, her wide brow creased in thought as she went over the unexpected scene that had just been enacted. Out of a mist a clear picture emerged; she saw Thane, coolly unemotional over what she had said about his keeping strictly to the role of guardian. But she saw now that the coolness was no more than a veneer, kept in place as a cover for his wrath by pride alone, since to lose his temper would reveal so much. A moment ago, owing to the manner in which she had spoken to him, the smouldering embers had burst into flame and pride had gone by the board.
Did this mean what it appeared to mean? she asked herself breathlessly, automatically fingering the bruises he had left on her arms. Surely such anger stemmed from love. Yes, it must do! She ran to the top of the stairs and, like Thane, took them two at a time, taking great jumps as she did so, and reaching the front door just in time to see the utility speeding along beneath the avenue of eucalypts shading the drive. Ian and Dena were in the car, Ian having driven over in his Land-Rover which was parked right there, in front of the homestead. Dena turned as if sensing Loren’s presence, there on the steps. She spoke and Ian also turned; both waved while Thane drove, his eyes on the road ahead, the road winding out to the airstrip. Cupping her hands, Dena shouted at the top of her voice,
‘’Bye, Loren. Thought you’d still be asleep so didn’t want to disturb you. See you the day after tomorrow....’ Her voice faded away to silence, and then the kookaburra chuckled in the gum tree before bursting into hilarious laughter, telling the world how satisfied it was with life.
Biting her lip, Loren went indoors and along to the breakfast-room where Maisie was waiting to serve her.
‘I did think he would have taken me too.’ The sulky complaint grated on Loren’s ears because it had been repeated several times that day. ‘He knew I wanted to go. And I’ll bet he’d have taken me if it hadn’t been for Dena and Ian wanting to go. Stupid pair - getting married!’ Janet and Loren were in the garden; Loren had a book open, but Janet had merely been staring into space, or complaining about the jackos in the tree, laughing at their own jokes, as she put it in her discontented tone of voice.
‘Dena and Ian happen to be in love,’ returned Loren quietly. ‘It’s natural that they should want to get married.’ ‘You know my ideas about love, so we’ll not fall out by discussing it. Are we going to Kouri End or aren’t we?’ Loren sighed and said no, they were not going to Kouri End.
‘I don’t know why you should keep on about it, Janet,’ she added with a hint of exasperation. ‘I’ve told you that Thane advised me not to go far from the homestead until I’m more used to the bush. I can drive all right, he admits that, but he’s afraid that if I go far I’ll get lost.’
‘How can you - when you know your way? You’ve said you went with Dena, so you must know your way. ’
‘I think I know it,’ returned Loren candidly. ‘But Dena used bush tracks quite a lot and it’s just possible that I’d take the wrong ones.’ Janet would have interrupted, but Loren prevented her by saying, ‘I can’t take you, I’m sorry. Thane would be angry if I went against his wishes.’ And she had no desire that she should anger Thane. On the contrary, she hoped that something rather wonderful would happen immediately on his return.
‘Wishes - or orders?’ A laugh escaped Janet, but it was plain to see that she was immeasurably bored. ‘So now you know he can be frightening?’ As Loren had not the patience to reply a long silence fell between them before Janet broke it, casting a sidelong glance at her cousin.
‘He need never know we’ve been. If we went very early in the morning we’d be back in time for dinner and no one need know where we’ve been all day.’
Loren frowned, thinking of the endless hours between now and the day after tomorrow when Thane would return and expect her to have her explanation ready. She glanced at Janet, wondering what she would say were she to know that very soon Thane was to hear the truth - that Janet was responsible for the rift that had occurred between Thane and Loren. He would have to know, that was for sure because Loren could see no way of keeping her cousin’s name out of it. The full explanation which Thane demanded could not be given otherwise. As if sensing her hesitation Janet said again that Thane need never know they had been to Kouri End — so long as they arrived back in time for dinner, that was.
‘I’ll think about it,’ Loren promised at last, feeling that perhaps it would be a good thing to go off for the day tomorrow, so shortening this almost unendurable period of waiting.
‘If it’s the long drive that’s troubling you, I can drive, remember. I’ll take a turn if you want me to.’ Janet had no intention of allowing the matter to drop and at last Loren agreed to go into town the following day.
The drive was uneventful, both girls taking a turn at the wheel, but once in Kouri End Janet did nothing but find fault with it.
‘I told you it would be a dump at the end of a railroad, remember?’ Disparagingly she looked into the shop windows which they passed. ‘What can you buy in a place like this?’
‘Dena and I managed to get all we wanted. This is the shop we went into. Come on, you’ll be surprised at what they have.’ ‘Paris fashions galore!’ Janet was exclaiming a few moments later as she and Loren stood by a counter where a smiling assistant was bringing out sweaters for Janet to see. ‘But how exciting!’ The sarcasm was not lost on the assistant and she glanced at Loren, whom she remembered from the previous visit.
‘If you don’t want them,’ murmured Loren very softly, ‘then let’s go. There’s no need to adopt this attitude.’ The assistant was away out of earshot, taking more sweaters from a drawer.
‘By all means let’s go,’ and Janet would have walked out without even telling the assistant that she could stop searching, as she had nothing suitable, but Loren remained by the counter and when the assistant returned with several more sweaters Loren chose one and handed over the money for it.
‘I thought you said you didn’t need a sweater,’ commented Janet in a bored voice when they came from the store.
‘I didn’t, but you were so rude. Dena and I have to shop there in future, remember.’
‘Poor things! Is there a decent restaurant in this dump? No, there can’t be. Lord, where can we eat? - or must we go back to the jeep and satisfy ourselves with those stale sandwiches we’ve brought with us?’
‘There’s a cafe,’ Loren’s voice was stiff with suppressed ang
er. She added that the sandwiches would not be stale as they were in a special container.
‘Let’s take a look at the cafe. I don’t feel like sandwiches, stale or fresh. Besides, bread’s no good for the figure.’
Loren thought the lunch was most appetizing and had it not been for her cousin’s grumbles she could have thoroughly enjoyed it. But Janet picked, leaving a saucy plate, and even found fault with the sweet, saying the cream was sour.
‘It doesn’t taste sour to me,’ was all Loren said, and ate her own sweet despite the fact that Janet sat there evincing all the signs of impatience which Loren remembered of old.
‘It was a complete waste of time,’ Janet was saying as they drove home under the hot afternoon sun. ‘Not even a decent
place to eat!’
Loren drove on in silence, her patience becoming exhausted. Perhaps Janet would soon leave Australia, seeing that she so disliked everything about it. ‘ She can’t leave soon enough for me,’ Loren murmured to herself, then immediately felt ashamed. Where would Janet live? She would be all by herself if she returned to England - unless of course she decided to share a flat with one of her unmarried friends.
‘Shall I drive?’ Janet offered about a couple of hours later, and as the sun was scorching and Loren felt she could do with a rest, especially for her eyes, she stopped the jeep and they changed seats. Loren closed her eyes, glad to be able to shut out the shimmering haze that hung over the bushlands. She dozed, waking up only when the vehicle bumped violently over some very rough ground.
‘This isn’t right.’ Her heart gave a lurch as she sat up straight and gazed around. ‘You’ve missed your way.’
‘I thought I had. But you were asleep, so I didn’t trouble you. Shall I turn back?’
‘Yes, you better had. Have you any idea where you went wrong? What I mean is, can you remember how far back it was?’
‘There were several tracks and I took the one to the left, because of the sun. I’ve a very good sense of direction, as you know.’
