He looked at her and she looked back at him as if she were expecting some sort of an explanation. Did he owe her one? Or did she owe him? He tried to read the answer in her face, but how could he keep from drowning in her beautiful emerald eyes? “I didn’t think this would be so awkward,” he finally said.
Ruby shrugged. “You didn’t think about a lot of things,” she said.
“No, I guess I didn’t.” But he had. He had lain in his lonely bunk and dreamed of Ruby every night. He had counted the days until he could go home and hold her in his arms forever.
And now, when forever could really happen, Ruby stood in front of him, her arms folded across her chest as though he owed her an explanation. And he didn’t know why. He had to understand. He had to get that second chance.
“I’m sorry, Sam,” Ruby finally said. “You look tired. Would you like to sit down?”
She took his hand, and that old familiar warmth surged through him as she drew him toward the sofa. Gratefully, Sam sank into the deep cushions. He’d worked like a horse to get his injured leg to hold him up, but it was still weak, and he still wasn’t sure it wouldn’t give out on him and make him fall on his face in front of Ruby.
Instead of settling down beside him, Ruby took the love seat on the other side of the coffee table. Maybe, for now, that was better. Just looking at her porcelain skin with that golden dusting of freckles had him wanting to touch her, wanting to run his fingers through her fiery hair. But until he was sure his wife wanted him back, he would try to keep his distance.
She crossed her legs demurely at the ankles and rested her hands in her lap, a gesture so familiar, yet strange, considering she was dressed in faded denim jeans and a functional chambray work shirt. Sam thought she looked great in everything, from the tailored business suits she’d worn in California when he’d first met her, to nothing at all. His pulse quickened at the thought.
Damn. He had to get himself together. He swallowed and cleared his throat. “I’m out of the air force,” he announced.
Ruby looked up quickly and blinked. Then she blinked again. “You retired? You gave it all up?”
Sam shook his head. “Medical retirement.” He nodded in the direction of his right leg. “Can’t jump anymore.” That was an understatement. The docs had had a hell of a time putting his leg back together, but he wouldn’t tell Ruby that right now. He wanted her back on his own terms, not out of pity.
“I’m sorry,” she said softly. But was she really? Sam wondered. “I know how much you loved the parachuting and the excitement,” she added, closing and opening her hands in her lap. Sam knew that gesture meant she was in turmoil. Did that mean she still cared?
“It was only a job, Ruby, not an emotional commitment,” he said, his voice thick with feeling.
She looked at him as if she wasn’t sure she’d heard him. “I wish I could believe that.”
“You can, Ruby. Have I ever lied to you?”
Suddenly a light seemed to snap on behind Ruby’s eyes, and they flashed with anger. “Yes, you have, if you can call a broken promise a lie. Or does it not count if the little wife doesn’t know about it? You lied to me, Sam. You broke your promise…and you broke my heart when you did.”
Now Sam thought he understood. All that time, he’d thought that Ruby had filed for divorce because of the money. When he’d tried to return her call five months ago, Honor Lassiter, the other owner of the Mercantile, had breathlessly told him about their lottery win, and at the same time had told him that Ruby wouldn’t talk to him.
Weeks later he’d gotten a letter from her Pine Run lawyer. He’d assumed she’d filed because she wanted all the money for herself. Well, that was fine with him. All he wanted was Ruby. She could do whatever she wanted with the money. Except…dump him.
With nothing left to live for, he’d pulled out all the stops and volunteered for every dangerous mission that had come up. His death wish had almost been granted a month later, but when he’d recovered from his injuries, he’d vowed he’d do what he could to get Ruby back. Of course, there’d been no way in hell he was going to crawl back to her. He’d go back to her on his own two feet or not at all. He didn’t want her pity. He wanted her.
And he wanted her to want him.
Sam swallowed his pride and drew in a deep breath of air. “I am truly sorry, Ruby,” he said. “I didn’t realize then just how strongly you felt about those missions.”
“Why not?” Ruby challenged. “A promise is a promise. You can’t just back out of one when it’s convenient. It should have been very clear how I felt about those missions. We’d been married for almost ten years when I asked you to quit. Surely you could have read the signs.”
“What signs? You never said a word.”
“I shouldn’t have had to. If you loved me, you should have known.”
“Ruby, darlin’, I’m not a mind reader. If you didn’t like them, if they worried you, you should have told me.” Sam thought back to the many times she’d kissed him and smiled bravely as he’d hurried out in the middle of the night. Had it all been an act? A brave front? “Instead, you almost seemed anxious to let me go.”
Ruby closed her eyes and leaned back in the love seat. “I didn’t want to worry you, Sam. I thought you had enough to contend with without having to worry about me at home. After all, I wasn’t going off into harm’s way.”
“You could have told me that when I came home. I wasn’t going to war then,” he reminded her gently.
“Then I didn’t need to. Then you were there. Then things were right and good. But that still doesn’t change the fact that you broke your promise. I never would have agreed to that stupid plan to let you take that last overseas assignment if I’d had any idea you’d put yourself in danger.”
Sam smiled. It was true. Being at home was always great, like a honeymoon every day, but they’d never really talked. Not about the important stuff, anyway. “Ruby, at the time I made that promise, I truly meant it. But circumstances changed.”
Ruby raised her hands in protest. “Don’t give me that,” she protested sharply. “You made a promise to me. And you broke it. Just because you didn’t expect me to find out doesn’t change things. I did find out, Sam. I did. And you…broke my heart.”
Hearing her say that again almost broke his, but Sam pulled himself together. “I would have told you about it, Ruby. When I could.”
“Can you tell me now, or is it another one of those if-I-tell-you-I’ll-have-to-kill-you things?” she challenged.
A lot of details were still classified, but Sam figured he could tell her some. “Let’s just say a teammate needed help and there was no one else available at the time.” He could see that Ruby wasn’t swallowing it. “I can’t tell you any more, Ruby. I would if I could. Just believe me. I would not have gone if there had been anyone else to do it.” Ruby knew full well that a combat controller never left a fallen buddy behind. Surely, she understood that.
Ruby started to say something, then snapped her mouth shut. After a long moment’s pause, she said carefully, “You’ve given me a lot to think about, Sam. And I don’t want to make a hasty decision this time. Leave me alone and let me think about it.”
Sam got to his feet. “Fair enough,” he said, restraining himself from cheering. “I know I’ve got to prove myself to you, and I’ll do just that. In the meantime, I’m staying at Gwen Tanner’s boardinghouse if you need to reach me.” Of course, he’d rather be staying here, but he figured he wouldn’t push his luck. Yet. As he took his leave, he just prayed that Ruby would come to the right conclusion.
Chapter Two
Ruby stood in the doorway and watched Sam drive away in that stupid Corvette he loved so much. He’d once told her that driving it was the closest thing to flying that he could do on the ground. Personally, riding in it scared her to death. The sports car looked so out of place on the dirt roads among the rolling hills of eastern Montana. She wondered if Sam would ever give it up.
She was tr
uly glad that he had left the air force. She was glad he’d come to her, but she still wasn’t certain that she really came first with him. Yes, his explanation about why he’d gone on that mission sounded good, but was that the whole truth? Would he even have told her that much if he hadn’t been caught lying?
If he hadn’t injured his leg so that he could no longer do the job, would he have come home now? Would he have made the same decision? And if his leg became stronger, would he just find some other dangerous occupation? She had to know.
She thought she’d much rather hold him at arm’s length until she was sure he was going to stay. She couldn’t bear to have him break her heart again.
She watched until the car bounced out of sight, then she turned back inside.
Nick was there. When had he come back in?
“So, that was Sam,” he said.
“Yes, that was Sam.”
“What did he want?”
“Me,” Ruby said simply.
“You gonna let him have what he wants?”
Ruby drew in a deep breath. “I don’t know, Nick. I truly don’t know.” And she didn’t want to talk to Nick about it. She had to figure this out by herself.
She’d believed she’d thought it all through. She’d figured she’d made the right decision to file for divorce. And once she’d made up her mind, she’d been determined to stick to her decision.
Then she’d seen Sam again. In the flesh, the living breathing man was a lot harder to forget than a box of snapshots and a few memories. Or a bottle of aftershave.
She smiled sadly. “I don’t feel much like company right now, Nick,” she murmured. “Do you mind?”
Nick just smiled and backed away. “I don’t mind, kid. I expect you have some thinking to do. I’ll just get my supper in town tonight.” He tipped an imaginary hat and left as quietly as he’d come.
Ruby sank to the sofa where Sam had been sitting only a few moments before. Was it her imagination or could she still feel the warmth of his body on the cushions? She picked up one of the throw pillows and hugged it to her breast.
She hadn’t anticipated this.
She hadn’t expected that Sam would leave the air force now, not after that last—what?—misunderstanding? Or had the air force left him? He had said that he’d been let out on medical retirement. She closed her eyes and tried to push all the worries and doubts out of her mind, but they wouldn’t go. Why did it all have to be so complicated?
If Sam hadn’t been hurt, would he still have come home to her?
Why couldn’t life be simple and happy as it had been when she was a child?
Ruby closed her eyes and heaved a huge sigh. Why couldn’t she be certain that Sam loved her for herself, and not just because he could no longer have his first love, or because he wanted to get his hands on all the lottery money? Would she ever know that he loved her more than the air force and the dangerous job he’d done so well?
More than a million dollars?
Did he love her just for herself?
SAM DROVE SLOWLY BACK through the small town of Jester. He’d never understood why Ruby had been so homesick for this tiny piece of real estate out in the middle of nowhere, this one-stoplight town, where winters could be brutal, at least to a guy raised in the Deep South, as he had been. He might have passed winter survival training, but he hadn’t liked it.
When he’d met her, Ruby had had a career as a buyer for a large department store near Travis Air Force Base in California, where he’d been stationed at the time. He’d thought she’d enjoyed the pace and the amenities of the large city. It had surprised him enough that she’d wanted to settle for co-owning the Mercantile in Jester, but at least she had the training for it. Now she wanted to farm? He could think of better things to waste a couple million dollars on.
True, she’d always loved making things grow. And, hell, when they’d first met, she’d had more tropical plants in her apartment than the set of a Tarzan movie. And after they’d married, wherever they lived, whether it be in base housing or off base, she’d always had a garden plot. Maybe this wasn’t such a farfetched idea, after all. Ruby certainly had a green thumb.
She had never felt comfortable living in military housing, and she’d never enjoyed the camaraderie he’d felt with his unit. So when he’d been given his last duty assignment overseas, she’d told him she wanted to come home to a place where everyone knew her rather than live at some overseas military base and wait for him when he disappeared for weeks at a time.
He guessed he could understand it.
And being here the last couple of days, seeing how the town had pulled together after their stroke of good fortune, Sam could see what his wife saw in the place. He just wished he’d realized it a lot sooner.
Maybe then he wouldn’t be standing on one bad leg and trying to figure out a way back into his wife’s heart. And her bed.
But he hadn’t counted on that long-haired hunk he’d seen with his hands all over his wife today. “Just Nick,” she’d called him. Just Nick? Did Sam dare hope that it meant he wasn’t someone special in Ruby’s life? Did that mean Ruby hadn’t moved on? Or did it mean she had so many guy friends that one, more or less, didn’t matter?
Hell, Sam didn’t know.
He parked his car on the road in front of Gwen’s boardinghouse. No sense hiding it now. He’d kept the sports car stored at Tex’s Garage while he was overseas, and it had been hard as hell not to take her out and drive while he’d been keeping a low profile. Now that Ruby knew he was back, he guessed there wasn’t much point in keeping it or himself out of sight.
Ruby knew where to find him now. It was up to her. He just hoped she’d call him soon. Otherwise he’d have to come up with a plan. And he didn’t have a clue what that would be.
He slammed the car door shut, leaving the John Deere cap and the fleece-lined denim jacket he’d used as camouflage on the seat, and limped up the walk to the boardinghouse. Gwen Tanner, looking frazzled and pale, her auburn hair coming undone from its usual upswept do, was in the entranceway, and he greeted her.
“Hello, Gwen,” he said simply. Gwen was about the same age as Ruby. However, her face had filled out, and she seemed to have grown plumper than he remembered.
“Sam? Sam Cade? What are you doing here?” Gwen walked over to him, and Sam could see why she appeared plumper. The woman was obviously pregnant. When had she gotten married?
“I’m in the spare room,” he said, deciding to skirt the pregnancy issue for the time being. Since he’d wanted to get the “lay of the land” before going to see Ruby, he’d registered as S.C. Samuels and had paid for a week’s stay in cash. It hadn’t taken much to come into town under the radar. He hadn’t recognized the woman who’d checked him in when he’d arrived a week ago, and she hadn’t known him. He made a point of staying out of sight after that. When a special operations combat controller went covert and didn’t want to be noticed, he wasn’t. “I came for Ruby.”
Now that Sam had made his presence known to Ruby, he figured it would be best to get his intentions out in the open. If that Nick guy was his competition, Sam intended for the man to know what he was up against. He just didn’t want to force a confrontation. And the more people who knew he was here to get his wife back, the better.
Sam needed as many people on his side as he could get.
“Now? After all that time?”
“Better late than never,” he said.
As he looked at the consternated expression on Gwen’s face, he had to wonder.
RUBY STUMBLED OUT OF BED at the crack of dawn, worn out from a second night of restless sleep. It had been two days since Sam had shown up unannounced at her door, and she was still no closer to knowing how she felt about it. She was pretty sure she accepted his explanation. She’d lived with the man long enough to know that he wasn’t a liar.
But what to do about it was another question. Her redheaded temper had caused her to fly off the handle and she’d filed for the divorce w
ithout really thinking the idea through. This time, by God, she was going to be sure before she did anything drastic.
It hadn’t been easy filing for divorce, but as the days had passed, the hurt had lessened. She’d learned to live without Sam. After all, she’d had plenty of practice. She’d also learned that she didn’t want to be alone.
When she’d seen him walking away the other day, it had all but broken her heart. The hurt she’d felt at learning he’d broken his promise had come sneaking back, but all her love and desire for him had come flooding back, as well. And she wasn’t sure which feeling was stronger.
Ruby splashed cold water on her face and ran a comb quickly through her hair. Still yawning and shivering in the morning chill, she made her way to the kitchen.
The smell of fresh coffee was enough to urge her on. Nick must have beaten her to the kitchen this morning and made the coffee. She’d have to thank him. As if all the help he’d given her in putting this place in order hadn’t been enough!
At the kitchen door, she leaned wearily against the jamb, closed her eyes and breathed in the reviving aroma of freshly brewed coffee. Nick was definitely a lifesaver this morning.
“Good morning, Ruby.”
“Sam?” She forced her sleepy eyes wide open. Sam was sitting at her kitchen table, looking as comfortable as if he belonged there. As he always had.
When he was at home.
“I let myself in,” he said simply. “I didn’t know when you’d be up, but I made the coffee. I know how you like it—rich and strong.” He got up, went to the coffeepot and poured a cup. “Here. It looks like you need it,” he said, holding it out to her.
Ruby wasn’t sure whether to be grateful or insulted. Sam had as much as said that she looked like something the cat had dragged in—a far cry from the perfectly attired businesswoman she’d been when they’d met years ago. So she simply murmured, “Thank you,” and accepted the mug.
Her chilly fingers closed around the warm porcelain and she breathed in the fragrant steam. “I’d forgotten how cold it can be in the mornings this late in spring,” she muttered inanely, at a loss to understand her soon-to-be ex-husband’s presence in her house this early in the day. “How did you get in?” she suddenly demanded.
Priceless Marriage Page 2
