by Tarrah Betts
Reluctantly, I started to gently rub her back, my hand on top of her t-shirt. “No, not like that, Roan,” she said weakly, pulling up the back of her shirt. “I see,” I said, trying to conceal my amusement at her blatant ploy to try and get me to touch her bare skin. Little did she know, that she only had to push a little harder and I would have given her anything she asked for.
I stuck my hand up the back of her shirt and traced her spine softly with my finger, from the nape of her neck to the small of her back. She exhaled gently and I could feel the tension leave her body as I laid my warm, open palm on her back and started rubbing her back. I alternated between rubbing and tracing circles and lines up and down her back.
She liked that, not only could I sense it, through our bond, I only had to look at the way the goose bumps broke out over her back and down her arms every time that I touched her.
I kept this up until she was a puddle of contentment and fell back asleep. But I didn’t want to stop, even though I knew she was far beyond feeling my hand glide over her.
Aspen’s skin was so soft; it was like running my hand up and down a piece of silk. I liked touching her more than I wanted to admit and enjoyed the sensation of closeness and intimacy with her. One thing I didn’t like though, was being able to feel her delicate spine and shoulder blades sticking out though her silky smooth skin.
She was much too thin for my liking, as women needed some meat on their bones to be healthy child bearers, not to mention the fact that I enjoyed the feel of lush curves under my hands while I made love to a woman.
I made a mental note to make sure Aspen started eating more once she was feeling better. She needed to put on some weight before I blood bonded with her, otherwise I would break her in half. A male Were needed a physically strong and healthy female human mate, not a tiny, skinny little waif like Aspen.
Morning came too soon, for my liking. I wanted to stay in bed, protecting and watching over my mate. It gave me a sense of direction and purpose that I’d not felt since Aspen started going through puberty and had pulled away from her emotionally and physically.
Pulling away from her had made me feel aimless, like a ship adrift at sea and I desperately desired that intense emotional and physical connection with her that came from a mating bond.
Soon, I would have to get up and leave her and fulfill my duty to bring the new male Were into the woods. For the first time ever in my position as Beta, I was conflicted about my duties to the pack. I did not want to bring the new Were to the pack camp in the woods…at all. I wanted to stay home and take care of Aspen, like a mate was supposed to.
“Our mate needs us,” my wolf said sharply.
“Yes, I know she needs us but Aspen is sick because of her own damn stupidity,” I ground out tersely.
“I am not saying that she needs us because she is physically ill, that will pass soon enough. I am referring to the fact that she was greatly emotionally distressed when we were gone away for five days. How will she feel when we are gone for over a month or possibly more?”
“Yes, I know that. I am concerned about it also. Who knows what she’ll do this time to punish me for leaving her alone?”
It was time to make a hard decision. It was either Aspen or the needs and safety of the pack, and the knowledge ate away at me like acid on tender flesh. I needed to speak to the Alpha and tell him of my concerns before I made a rash decision.
Reluctantly, I untangled myself from Aspen’s arms and legs and got up from my bed. But, rather than leave the room, I just stood there like a lovesick imbecile and took in her sleep softened features and wild, curly hair that seemed to be everywhere.
God, she was beautiful. What had I done to deserve a mate as beautiful and tempting as she?
I tucked the blanket around Aspen. But she didn’t stir at all while I tucked her in; she was completely exhausted from her ordeal. She was “dead to the world”, as my father used to say.
I smiled and shook my head; my room was going to smell like her for a very long time but my bed would be the worst. I could smell Aspen’s scent everywhere, the sheets, and the pillow; even the mattress smelled like her. I could always wash the sheets but the mattress was another matter entirely. I would have to buy some fabric refresher and spray my entire room.
Hopefully, her scent dissipated quickly or I would be sleeping on the couch for a while. The last thing I needed was to have some kind of hot sexual dream about Aspen in the middle of the night, only to wake up with a hard on and my bed smelling like her.
I didn’t need any more temptation, I’d already had enough of it just by living in the same house and “it” was currently lying in my bed right now. Softly closing the door, I went into the kitchen to make some breakfast and call the Alpha.
Chapter 20
***
I woke up some time in the late afternoon, feeling like I imagined death would feel like.
My insides felt raw and exposed. But it was my stomach, oh my poor stomach, that bothered me the most. It felt like someone had washed out the inside of my stomach with Drano, swished it around and left it to sit for awhile before dumping it back out.
I was going to die, I was sure of it.
I had never felt so sick in my entire life, not even that time I’d had my tonsils out as a kid and had to spend a week in the hospital because the site got infected, was as bad as I felt today.
My head felt like someone had cleaved it wide open with an axe. And just to make sure, I reached my hands up and gingerly probed my entire scalp, I was positive my brain must be leaking out somewhere, I just had to find out where. Even the sensation of my pulse bounding in my temples was enough to start me throwing up again.
If this was how terrible drinking alcohol made you feel the morning after,then why did so many people do it? The after effects were horrendous!
Carefully opening my eyes, I looked around and saw that I wasn’t in my room. I was comfortably tucked in and sandwiched between a mountain of grey comforter and silky black sheets. It was Roan’s comforter, not my pink one with satin around the edges that surrounded me.
What the heck was I doing sleeping in Roan’s bed? I quickly searched my memories from last night but it was all a fuzzy, chopped up blur. I remembered coming home and the absolute terror that seized hold of me from seeing Roan’s truck parked in the driveway.
There was no way I would ever forget that as long as I lived.
And then things were pretty confusing from there on in. Oh my god, I hope I didn’t climb into Roan’s bed in the middle of the night with the drunken intention of seducing him or something? My face burned scarlet at the very thought of me forcing myself on him.oh god, I would never be able to look him straight in the face again.
Where was Roan? Could he be in the room right now? Just standing there. Watching and waiting for me to wake up so he could give me hell again for last night.
I held my head up and barely peeked over the covers. Looking around the room made my head ache but Roan was nowhere in sight, so I thankfully dropped my head back down as my stomach started to churn again. Ugh, the world was spinning and I closed my eyes and promptly fell back asleep.
I woke up and looked at the alarm clock next to Roan’s bed. It was well into the afternoon. I had slept almost the entire day away!
While I felt much clearer, from a mental perspective. Physically speaking, I still felt like garbage.
My head continued to pound and my stomach was still raw, that hadn’t improved much at all in the past few hours and truthfully, I supposed I deserved every bit of it. How could I have broken Roan's trust like that? And to top it all off, I was an awful drunk that couldn’t handle her liquor. Ugh.
I looked around the room and saw that there was something on Roan’s pillow next to me. I reached out and made a grab for it without moving my head too much. It felt like a hard, rectangular shaped box. Bringing it in front of my face, I saw that it was an IPhone box with a piece of paper folded neatly underneath it and
tied with pink ribbon and silky pink bow.
Holy crap! Was this for me? I turned the box upside-down to study the piece of paper and sure enough, written on the outside fold, in Roan’s bold script were the words “Little Girl”. Carefully unwrapping the ribbon, I unfolded the paper and began to read:
“Aspen, I’m sorry but I had to take the new male Were up to the training camp in the woods today. Until he is deemed safe to live amongst all of us, we cannot trust him. I do this for your safety as well as the safety of the entire pack. I know I told you that I would take you to the training camp when I got back and I still will, I promise. I have bought you a cell phone so you can call or text me at ANY TIME of the day or night. I will answer it, trust me.
I don’t want to ever have a repeat of the events of last night; do you understand me, little girl? Futhermore, you are grounded for one month. This means no going out after school for any reason, unless you are in need of medical attention and have to get to the hospital, you got me? You will go to school and then come right back home.
In addition, Caver will be staying at the house until I return in about a month.
There is a glass of orange juice on the night stand along with some Advil and Gravol. Make sure you take both pills and drink all the juice. You feel terrible because you are dehydrated. Get up, go to the bathroom, take the pills and then go back to bed. You’ll feel a bit better later when you wake up. Text me whenever you want to.
And Aspen, for the record, I would never abandon you…ever.
Roan
PS. Clean your room, it’s a mess PPS. Be good or else!”
A whole month! Roan was going to be gone for a whole month! I wanted to cry.
He was leaving me again and just after he had returned home and everything! I wanted him here, where he was supposed to be, not in the woods with some stupid new Were. I felt sad and angry. He’d written that he would never abandon me but I sure felt like I was being left behind!
I picked up the IPhone and turned it on and like the control freak he was, Roan had already set it up for me. He’d even set a picture of a black wolf as my wallpaper. Figures.
It wasn’t Blackie, though. I would know Roan’s wolf anywhere. This wallpaper wolf didn’t look big enough for one thing and he didn’t hold the same look of intelligence in his eyes that Blackie did.
Roan’s wolf was really large, as far as wolves go. He looked scary and intimidating in his wolf form but I wasn’t scared of him at all; he was a giant pussycat with me. I could get him to roll over, play fetch or do pretty much anything I asked of him.
Blackie had been my constant companion as I grew up. He used to follow me to the park when I was little, then lay down in the shade and watch me play with the other pack kids.
I remembered this one time that stood out in my head; it was shortly after I’d arrived in Spruce Hollow. It was in the fall and I’d just turned seven years old. There was this older boy who used to go to the park and bully the smaller kids. One day, he shoved me while I was getting off the slide and called me a “dirty, little orphan”. I fell into the corner of the metal slide and split my lip wide open.
While I screamed like a banshee as blood trickled down my chin and stained my white “Unicorn Princess” t-shirt, Blackie was up and on that boy in a flash as the little jerk ran off laughing. He wasn’t laughing for long as Blackie bit him in the ass, knocked him to the ground and stood over him, foaming and snarling like a crazed lunatic until the bully cried out that he was sorry.
Roan phased and carried me home, bleeding and sobbing. The cut was so deep that he had to bring me to the pack’s doctor, Dr. Mac Ardle, where I received several stitches on the inside of my mouth to close up my lip.
It wasn't an event that I was likely to forget as I still had a very fine, nearly unnoticeable scar between my upper lip and nose. I didn’t care how much Sorcha told me that you could barely tell.
I knew it was there.
The one good thing that did come from it though, is that no one on the playground ever bullied me like that again though.
Blackie was very protective of me and used to sleep at the end my bed at night, whenever I was sick with a cold or the flu. He would lay there with his head on his paws and just watch over me. His presence was comforting because I knew no matter what happened to me; I was always safe whenever my wolf was around.
I’d named him Blackie back when I was six years old, as I didn’t understand at the time that Roan and Blackie were the same entity. Blackie didn’t care though, he always answered to the name I'd given to him and over time, it just stuck. Blackie loved me madly and I loved him back just as much.
I was saddened that he would be gone for so long. Who was going to jump up on my bed to wake me up every morning while licking my face and thumping their tail loudly? Who would sit with me on the couch while I watched tv? Certainly not Caver, that’s for sure. No, that would just be weird. It could only be my Blackie.
In my eyes, no one else could ever replace him.
I turned the phone over in my hand, gently running my fingers over all the buttons on the sides of the phone.
I was mesmerized, I had never owned my own cell phone before. I rotated the screen facing me and just stared at it. An excited little jolt of excitement shot through me as it dawned on me that I could contact Roan anytime I wanted to.
He’d even said so.
I could call him, text him or send him pictures at anytime of the day, or night for that matter. This cell phone was a lifeline and a direct connection to Roan anytime that I cared to use it. The knowledge that he was committing his time to being accessible to me took some of the sting out of his sudden departure to the training camp with the new Were.
I excitedly tapped the text message icon and Roan’s number had already been pre-entered as a contact. I pressed on his name and started to compose a short text.
You’re not here.
I hesitated. Would Roan respond like he said he would? I took a deep breath and pressed send.
The phone hummed with a response right away.
Yes, I know. I left you a note. Did you take the Advil and Gravol yet?
Umm, no. But I will, I promise
You’d better. Is Caver there yet?
I don’t know I haven’t gotten out of bed
Still sleeping in my bed, are you?
Yeah, it’s bigger and more comfortable than mine
Don’t get any ideas, it’s mine Thank you for the phone. I’m sorry for last night, Roan
It’s over; I don’t want to talk about it.
Ok. Are you at the camp yet?
No, almost. Keep your phone on you, incase I need to reach you
Ok. Can I text you whenever I want?
Yep, anytime at all, ok little girl?
Ok. You’re going to be gone a long time, aren’t you :(
I don’t know but you can call or text me every single day if you want to, ok?
Ok, I guess so
K’, gotta go little girl. Go take your Advil and the Gravol. You’ll feel better, I promise.
Oh fine, bye then
Bye, text me later
Chapter 21
***
I smiled inwardly as I shoved my phone into my backpack. While I had initially balked at the Alpha’s suggestion, I was glad I had bought Aspen the phone. It made me feel closer to her but still allowed me the freedom to fulfill my duties to the pack.
I’d been hesitant to leave her this morning. She’d looked so small and fragile sleeping in my bed and it was precisely those feelings that ultimately made me decide that I needed to leave and take the new Were to the camp. I couldn’t allow myself to fall completely head over heels in love with her just yet.
Things were bad enough the way they were going right now.
I needed some distance and time away from Aspen to process my feelings and regroup. It was confusing to know where to go from here, especially with no other Were being able to offer guidance on the matter. Oh no,
‘I’ was the trailblazer in the matter of encountering mates in their formative years.
Lucky me.
I guess I’d never really thought that things between Aspen and I would turn into this weird semi sexual, teasing type of relationship. It’s like one day, she was this cute little girl with a mop of long, curly hair and the next, she was a tempestuous ball of sexual hormones in booty shorts and a crop top. I guess I never really contemplated the stages she was going to pass though on her way from childhood to her becoming my mate.
She was truly growing up right in front of my eyes.
I’d made several phone calls this morning while Aspen slept peacefully in my bed. The most important one being to my Alpha. I needed his guidance as he was a very wise man and I knew if anyone could put things into perspective for me, it was my father.
Even though it was early in the morning, Slade still answered on the very first ring and I proceeded to tell him everything that’d happened last night.
Absolutely. Everything.
From Justin bringing Aspen to a party and plying her with alcohol, to Aspen crying and throwing up, to me punching a hole in the wall and letting her sleep in my bed. I left out no detail, not even the fact that I saw her naked and she told me that she loved me. I felt emotionally drained when the last words spilled from my mouth. And then I held my breath and waited for my Alpha’s advice.
“I think maybe you and Aspen could benefit from some time away from one another right now, Roan. It is never a good sign when a situation gets this volatile. I realize you are having a hard time with your mate being so young. Especially now, as she seems to be a very willing participant. You have been a very patient man by waiting for her for all these years, Roan. You really have. Perhaps you need to ask yourself whether it is time to step back and devote some time to your relationship with Andrea and let Aspen completely mature and grow up like a normal teenager or perhaps it’s time for you to admit that you have done this for far longer than would be asked of any Were and take her as your mate now. In the end, the choice is yours alone to make.”
