by Cat Schield
He stroked his hands up her spine, fingers gliding over her silken skin, feeling the ridges made by her ribs. “It’s the first I’ve ever had sex without protection.”
“Really?” She peered at him from beneath her lashes. “I’m your first?”
“My only.”
The instant the words were out, Jason knew he’d said too much. Delight flickered in her gaze. Her glee lasted only for the briefest of instances, but he’d spotted it, knew what he’d given away.
“I like the sound of that.”
“Only because I am never going to get anyone but you pregnant.”
Her smile transformed her from serene and mysterious to animated and exotic. “I like the sound of that, too.” This time when she kissed him, there was no teasing in her actions. She took his mouth, plunged her tongue deep and claimed him.
Fisting a hand in her hair, Jason answered her primal call. Their tongues danced in familiar rhythm, as if they hadn’t had their first kiss over a decade before. He knew exactly how to drive her wild, what made her groan and tremble.
“I’ll let you in on a little secret,” she whispered, her breath hot in his ear. “You’re my first, too.”
Incapable of speech as she explored his chest, her clever fingers circling his nipples, nails raking across their sensitive surface, he arched his brow at her in question.
“I’ve never had sex on a kitchen chair before.” She rotated her hips in a sexy figure eight that wrenched a groan from his throat. “I rather like it.”
Pressure built in his groin as she continued to experiment with her movements. Straddling his lap, she had all the control she could ever want to drive him mad. Breath rasping, eyes half-closed, Jason focused on her face to distract himself from the pleasure cascading through his body. In all the dreams he’d had of her, nothing had been this perfect.
Arching her back, she shifted the angle of her hips and moved over him again. “Oh, Jason, this is incredible.”
“Amazing.” He garbled the word, provoking a short laugh from her. “Perfect.”
“Yes.” She sat up straight and looked him square in the eyes. “It’s never been like this.”
“For me, either.”
Deciding they’d done enough talking, Jason kissed her, long and deep. Her movements became more urgent as their passion burned hotter. His fingers bit into her hips, guiding her. A soft cry slipped from her parted lips. Jason felt her body tense and knew she was close. That’s all it took to start his own climax. Gaze locked on her face, he held back, waiting for her to pitch over the cliff. The sheer glory of it caught him off guard. She gave herself completely to the moment. And called his name.
With his ears filled with her rapture, he lost control and spilled himself inside her. They were making more than a baby. They were making a moment that would last forever. The richness of the experience shocked him. Never in a million years would he have guessed that letting himself go so completely would hit him with this sort of power.
Shaking, Jason gathered Ming’s body tight against his chest and breathed heavily. As the last pulses of her orgasm eased, he smoothed her hair away from her face and bestowed a gentle kiss on her lips.
“I’m glad I was your first,” she murmured, her slender arms wrapped around his neck.
He smiled. “I’m glad you’re my only.”
*
Taking full advantage of Jason’s king-size bed, Ming lay on her stomach lengthwise across the mattress. With her chin on his chest, her feet kicking the air, she watched him. Naked and relaxed, he’d stretched out on his back, his hands behind his head, eyes closed, legs crossed at the ankle. An easy smile tipped the corners of his lips upward. Ming regarded his satisfied expression, delighted that she’d been the one to bring him to this state. Twice.
While her body was utterly drained of energy, the same couldn’t be said for her mind. “Now that we have that out of the way, perhaps you can explain why you’ve been avoiding me for two days.”
Jason’s expression tightened. “Have you talked to your sister?”
“Lily?” Ming pushed herself into a sitting position. “We had brunch before I came here. Why?”
His lashes lifted. “She didn’t tell you.”
She had no idea what he was talking about. “Tell me what?”
“About her and Evan.” Jason looked unhappy. “They’ve been seeing each other.”
“My sister and your brother?” Ming repeated the words but couldn’t quite get her mind around the concept. “Seeing each other…you mean dating?”
Her gaze slid over Jason. Two weeks ago she’d have laughed at anyone who told her she and Jason were going to end up in bed together. The news of Evan and Lily was no less unexpected.
“Yes.” He touched her arm, fingers gentle as they stroked her skin. “Are you okay?”
His question startled her. But it was the concern on his face that made her take stock of her reaction. To her dismay she felt a twinge of discomfort. But she’d be damned if she’d admit it.
“If they get married we’ll end up being brother and sister.” She was trying for levity but fell short of the mark.
Jason huffed out an impatient breath. “Don’t make light of this with me. I’m worried that you’ll end up getting hurt.”
Ming’s bravado faded. “But it can’t be that serious. Lily is moving to Portland. She wouldn’t be doing that if they had a future together.” Her voice trailed away. “That’s why she’s leaving, isn’t it? They’re in love and my sister can’t break it off and stick around. She needs to move thousands of miles away to get over him.”
“I don’t know if your sister is in love with Evan.”
“But Evan’s in love with her.”
Jason clamped his mouth shut, but the truth was written all over his face.
Needing a second to recover her equilibrium, Ming left the bed and snagged Jason’s robe off the bathroom door. She put it on and fastened the belt around her waist. By the time she finished rolling up the sleeves, she felt calmer and more capable of facing Jason.
“How long have you known?” Ming heard the bitterness in her voice and tried to reel in her emotions. Evan hadn’t exactly broken her heart when he’d ended their engagement, but that didn’t mean she hadn’t been hurt. She’d been weeks away from committing to him for the rest of her life.
“I’ve known they were going out but didn’t realize how serious things had gotten until I spoke with Evan last night.” Jason left the bed and came toward her. “Are you okay?”
“Sure.” Something tickled her cheek. Ming reached up to touch the spot and her fingers came away wet. “I’m fine.”
“Then why are you crying?”
Her heart pumped sluggishly. “I’m feeling sorry for myself because I’m wondering if Evan ever loved me.” She stared at the ceiling, blinking hard to hold back the tears. “Am I so unlovable?”
Jason’s arms came around her. His lips brushed her cheek. “You’re the furthest thing from unlovable.”
Safe in his embrace, she badly wanted to believe him, but the facts spoke loud and clear. She was thirty-one, had never been married and was contemplating single motherhood.
“One of these days you’ll find the right guy for you. I’m sure of it.”
Hearing Jason’s words was like stepping on broken glass. Pain shot through her, but she had nowhere to run. The man her heart had chosen had no thought of ever falling in love with her.
Ming pushed out of Jason’s arms. “Did you really just say that minutes after we finished making love?”
His expression darkened. “I’m trying to be a good friend.”
“I get that we’re never going to be a couple, but did it ever occur to you that I might not be thinking about another man while being naked with you?” Her breath rushed past the lump in her throat.
“That’s funny.” His voice cracked like a whip. “Because just a second ago you were crying over the fact that my brother is in love with your sister.”
; Ming’s mouth popped open, but no words emerged. Too many statements clogged the pathway between her brain and her lips. Everything Jason had said to her was perfectly reasonable. Her reactions were not. She was treating him like a lover, not like a friend.
“You’re right. I’m a little thrown by what’s happening between Lily and Evan. But it’s not because I’m in love with him. And I can’t even think about meeting someone and starting a relationship right now.”
“Don’t shut yourself off to the possibility.”
“Like you have?” Ming couldn’t believe he of all people was giving her advice on her love life. Before she blurted out her true feelings, she gathered up all her wayward emotions and packed them away. “I’d better get home and check on Muffin.”
“I’m sure Muffin is fine.” Jason peered at her, his impatience banked. “Are you?”
“I’m fine.”
“Why don’t I believe you?”
She wanted to bask in his concern, but they were in different places in their relationship right now. His feelings for her hadn’t changed while she was dangerously close to being in love with him.
“No need to worry about me.” Ming collected her strength and gave him her best smile. Crossing to his dresser, she pulled out a T-shirt. “Is it okay if I borrow this since you ruined my blouse?”
Jason eyed her, obviously not convinced by her performance. “Go ahead. I don’t want to be responsible for any multicar pileups if you drive home topless.” His tone was good-natured, but his eyes followed her somberly as she exchanged shirt for robe and headed toward the door.
“I’ll call you later,” she tossed over her shoulder, hoping to escape before unhappiness overwhelmed her.
“You could stay for dinner.” He’d accompanied her downstairs and scooped up her black skirt and her hot pink thong before she could reach them, holding them hostage while he awaited her answer.
“I have some case files to look over before tomorrow,” she said, conscious of his gaze on her as she tugged her underwear and skirt from his hands.
“You can work on them after dinner. I have some reports to go over. We can have a study date just like old times.”
As tempting as that sounded, she recognized that it was time to be blunt. “I need some time to think.”
“About what?”
“Things,” she murmured, knowing Jason would never let her get away with such a vague excuse. Like how she needed to adjust to being friends and lovers with Jason. Then there was the tricky situation with her sister. She needed to get past being angry with Lily, not because she was dating Ming’s ex-fiancé, but because her sister might get what Ming couldn’t: a happily-ever-after with a man who loved her.
“What is there to think about?” Jason demanded. “We made love. Hopefully, we made a baby.”
Her knees knocked together. Could she be pregnant already? The idea thrilled her. She wanted to be carrying Jason’s child. Wanted it now more than ever. Which made her question her longing to become a mother. Would she be as determined if it was any other man who was helping her get pregnant? Or was she motivated by the desire to have something of Jason otherwise denied to her?
“I hope that, too.” She forced a bright smile.
His bare feet moved soundlessly on the tile floor as he picked up her ruined blouse and carried it to the trash. Slipping back into her clothes, she regarded him in helpless fascination.
In jeans and a black T-shirt, he was everything she’d ever wanted in a man, flaws and all. Strong all the time, sensitive when he needed to be. He demonstrated a capacity for tenderness when she least expected it. They were incredible together in bed and the best of friends out of it.
“Or are you heading home to fret about your sister and Evan seeing each other?”
“No.” But she couldn’t make her voice as convincing as she wanted it to sound. “Evan and I are over. It was inevitable that he would start dating someone.”
She just wished it hadn’t happened with her sister.
Ming lifted on her tiptoes and kissed Jason. “Thanks for a lovely afternoon.” The spontaneous encounter had knocked her off plan. She needed to regroup and reassess. Aiming for casual, she teased, “Let me know if you feel like doing it again soon.”
He grabbed her hand and pushed it against his zipper. “I feel like doing it again now.” His husky voice and the intense light in his eyes made her pulse rocket. “Stay for dinner. I promise you won’t leave hungry.”
The heat of him melted some of the chill from her heart. She leaned into his chest, her fingers curving around the bulge in his pants. He fisted his hand in her hair while his mouth slanted over hers, spiriting her into a passionate whirlwind. This afternoon she’d awakened to his hunger. The power of it set her senses ablaze. She was helpless against the appeal of his hard body as he eased her back against the counter. On the verge of surrendering to the mind-blasting pleasure of Jason’s fingers sliding up her naked thigh, his earlier words came back to her.
One of these days you’ll find the right guy for you.
She broke off the kiss. Gasping air into her lungs, she put her hands on Jason’s chest and ducked her head before he could claim her lips again.
“I’ve really got to go,” she told him, applying enough pressure to assure him she wasn’t going to be swayed by his sensual persuasion.
His hands fell away. As hot as he’d been a moment ago, when he stepped back and plunged his hands into his pockets, his blue eyes were as cool and reflective as a mountain lake.
“How about we have dinner tomorrow?” she cajoled, swamped by anxiety. As perfect as it was to feel his arms tighten around her, she needed to sort out her chaotic emotions before she saw him again.
“Sure.” Short and terse.
“Here?”
“If you want.” He gave her a stiff nod.
She put her hand on his cheek, offered him a glimpse of her longing. “I want very much.”
His eyes softened. “Five o’clock.” He pressed a kiss into her palm. “Don’t be late.”
Seven
Ming parked her car near the bleachers that overlooked the curvy two-mile track. Like most of the raceways where Jason spent his weekends, this one was in the middle of nowhere. At least it was only a couple of hours out of Houston. Some of the tracks he raced at were hundreds of miles away.
Jason was going to be surprised to see her. It had been six or seven years since she’d last seen him race. The sport didn’t appeal to her. Noisy. Dusty. Monotonous. She suspected the thrills came from driving, not watching.
So, what was she doing here?
If she was acting like Jason’s “friend,” she would have remained in Houston and spent her Saturday shopping or boating with college classmates. Driving over a hundred miles to sit on a metal seat in the blazing-hot sun fell put her smack dab in the middle of “girlfriend” territory. Would Jason see it as such? Ming took a seat in the stands despite the suspicion that coming here had been a colossal mistake.
The portion of track in front of her was a half-mile drag strip that allowed the cars to reach over a hundred miles an hour before they had to power down to make the almost ninety-degree turn at the end. The roar was impressive as twenty-five high-performance engines raced past Ming.
Despite the speed at which they traveled, Jason’s Mustang was easy to spot. Galaxy-blue. When he’d been working on the car, he’d asked for her opinion and she’d chosen the color, amused that she’d matched his car to his eyes without him catching on.
In seconds, the cars roared off, leaving Ming baking in the hot sun. With her backside sore from the hard bench and her emotions a jumble, it was official. She was definitely exhibiting “girlfriend” behavior.
And why? Because the past week with Jason had been amazing. It wasn’t just the sex. It was the intimacy. They’d talked for hours. Laughed. She’d discovered a whole new Jason. Tender and romantic. Naughty and creative. She’d trusted him to take her places she’d never been, an
d it was addictive.
Which is why she’d packed a bag and decided to surprise him. A single day without Jason had made her restless and unable to concentrate.
Ming stood. This had been a mistake. She wasn’t Jason’s girlfriend. She had no business inserting herself into his guy time because she was feeling lonely and out of sorts. She would just drive back to Houston and he’d never know how close she’d come to making a complete fool of herself over him.
The cars roared up the straightaway toward her once again. From past experience at these sorts of events, she knew the mornings were devoted to warm-up laps. The real races would begin in the afternoon.
She glanced at the cars as they approached. Jason’s number twenty-two was in the middle of the pack of twenty-five cars. He usually saved his best driving for the race. As the Mustang reached the end of the straightaway and began to slow down for the sharp turn, something happened. Instead of curving to the left, the Mustang veered to the right, hit the wall and spun.
Her lungs were ready to burst as she willed the cars racing behind him to steer around the wreckage so Jason didn’t suffer any additional impact. Once the track cleared, his pit crew and a dozen others hurried to the car. Dread encased Ming’s feet in concrete as she plunged down the stairs to the eight-foot-high chain-link fence that barred her from the track.
With no way of getting to Jason, she was forced to stand by and wait for some sign that he was okay. She gripped the metal, barely registering the ache in her fingers. The front of the Mustang was a crumpled mess. Ming tried to remind herself that the car had been constructed to keep the driver safe during these sorts of crashes, but her emotions, already in a state of chaos before the crash, convinced her he would never hear how she really felt about him.
“Wow, that was some crash,” said a male voice beside her. “Worst I’ve seen in a year.”
Ming turned all her fear and angst on the skinny kid with the baseball cap who’d come up next to her. “Do you work here?”
“Ah, yeah.” His eyes widened as the full brunt of her emotions hit him.
“I need to get down there, right now.”
