by E. L. Todd
It was a perk for both of us. Money didn’t mean anything to me when I had plenty of it. “What’s new with you? Are you still seeing Leslie?”
“Nah.” He shook his head but didn’t seem sad about it. “Didn’t work out.”
“That’s too bad,” I said. “She was cute.”
“Too jealous,” he said. “Always looking through my phone and flipping out if I even hugged another woman. Got to be too much.”
I never considered myself to be a jealous person until things started up with Rae. Every time Zeke was near her, I wasn’t happy about it. I’d never been jealous before or after. “Sounds like too much work.”
“I’ve never been the jealous type,” Liam said. “When I’m with a woman, I know she’s not gonna go looking for someone else. I’m just too sexy.”
I shared a look with John and rolled my eyes.
John did the same.
“Dude, Madeline is damn hot.” Liam rested his elbows on the bar as he stood beside me. “Those lips, that hair, that body…she’s an angel. I’d give anything to watch her dance.”
“You can always buy tickets to the ballet,” I reminded him. “But that would make you a little bit of a stalker.”
“Yeah, it would be creepy,” Liam said in agreement.
“Why didn’t you ask her out?” I asked. “Wasn’t that the whole reason why we went bowling?”
“I’ve got to take my time, you know,” Liam explained. “Play it cool.”
I’d never played it cool in my life. And neither did Austen—apparently.
The subject changed to sports, which we talked about at great length. Sports was a great topic because it stole my focus and I didn’t think about anything else. I didn’t wonder what Rae was doing back in Seattle, and I didn’t wonder if I made a mistake by not sleeping with Austen when I had the chance.
***
“Check out that babe.” John brought his lips to his glass and nodded to a table on the other side of the room.
I turned around and glanced in the direction he indicated, seeing a brunette in a backless black dress. She stood at the table with her drink in front of her, which was halfway empty. I recognized that shiny hair and perfect body. Those legs had been in countless fantasies of mine.
It was Austen.
A guy walked over to the table in jeans and a black t-shirt. He was tall and handsome, with rugged features that reminded me of an old movie star. Just like her friend Jared, he was a good-looking guy.
She chuckled at something he said, and he got closer to her, close enough to suggest they were on a date.
The jealousy exploded out of nowhere. Like a volcano with an eruption that was long overdue, I burst into fiery flames and lava. My jaw tightened in disappointment, and I counted the inches that existed between them. I just saw Austen the other night, and she made good on her word.
She’d already landed another guy.
“Damn, she’s with someone,” John said with a sigh. “The good ones are always taken.”
Liam returned from the bathroom and grabbed his whiskey from the counter. “What are you girls whispering about?”
“That hot chick over there,” John said with a nod.
“Actually, she’s not his type.” I managed to unhinge my jaw long enough to say that.
“All women are my type,” Liam argued. “Tall or short, it doesn’t matter to me.”
“Well, this one is your sister, so I think you’ll feel otherwise.” I pointed at the table where they were talking.
Liam narrowed his eyes until he recognized her face and brown hair. Then he stuck out his tongue in disgust. “Seven million people in this city but I run into her. Luck isn’t on my side tonight. Let’s head somewhere else.”
I didn’t want to walk away. If their date was going well, things might heat up and she could end up spending the night at his place. It shouldn’t matter to me if that happened, but it didn’t settle right with me. I wanted to take her home, not let some other guy enjoy her beautiful qualities. “I’m gonna stay here. There’s this woman I’ve been eyeing, so I’m gonna go for it.”
“You sure you don’t want us to wait?” John asked.
“No, I’ll catch up with you guys.” I raised my glass to them. “Or better yet, I hope I don’t.”
After a chuckle, Liam and John walked out and continued their adventure.
I turned back to the bar and discreetly watched them together, seeing the way she smiled effortlessly. I was straight, but I knew a good-looking guy when I saw one. All he had to do was be a little charming, and he could seal the deal.
The idea just pissed me off more.
When their glasses were empty, he returned to the bar to order another round.
Without thinking twice about it, I walked right up to her table. I approached her from the side, so she didn’t notice me right away. I was probably the last thing on her mind right now, the last guy she expected to see that evening.
When she noticed me in her peripheral, she glanced in my direction. She did a causal double take when she recognized me, assuming she must be mistaken. One eyebrow popped up before it returned to place. “Did you get lost on your way to the strip club?”
I admired how quick she was on her feet. Even when she was caught by surprise, she had a witty comment to break the ice. Her confidence was constant. Not even an earthquake could shake it. “Only if we’re gonna make out again.”
A soft smile spread across her lips, highlighting the rest of her beautiful features. “Small world, huh? Are you here with anyone?”
“Liam and my friend John. They just left.”
She glanced at her date, who was still standing at the bar trying to get their drinks. “I should tell you, I’m kinda on a date right now.”
I figured that out all by myself. “You don’t waste any time, huh?”
She wore the same smile, the sparkle in her eyes. “I told you I’m not the kind of woman to wait around. Jason and I work together. He asked me out at the end of the day, and since I think he’s cute, I figured it would be fine.”
“You think it’s smart to date someone you work with?”
She narrowed her eyes like I’d insulted her. “You think it’s smart not to date someone just because you’re friends with her brother?”
I smiled when she cornered me. “Touché.”
She glanced at him again before she turned back to me. “Well, have a good night. Hopefully, I’ll see you around.”
I didn’t want to walk away and let anything happen between them. But to purposely sabotage her date was a dick move. I had my chance, and I blew it—like always. “You want to come over and watch the game tomorrow night?”
Her brown hair was in soft curls that fell around her shoulders. Diamonds were in her ears, and a diamond pendant hung around her neck. She looked like a classy woman, but her own glow outshone every piece of jewelry she wore. Her complexion was perfect, just as fair as a collectible doll. Her eyes were bright and full of intelligent and ferocity. Everything about her was captivating—especially the words that came out of her mouth. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but that sounded like you just asked me on a date.”
“I asked you to come over for a beer—and sex.” I was going down a dangerous path, but I couldn’t stop myself. I had this feisty woman on my hands, a woman harder than steel. I should have kept kissing her the other night and taken her home instead of waiting until now to make my move. Or better yet, I should have walked out with the guys instead of coming over here. I was at war with myself, unsure what to do. I didn’t want to piss off Liam, but damn, I wanted to fuck this woman.
She shook her head with disappointment. “I’m gonna give it to you straight, Ryker. I think you’re one of the hottest men I’ve ever seen in my life.”
I grinned. “I like what I’m hearing.”
“I wanted to jump your bones the second I laid eyes on you. You look like a man who knows how to work a headboard.”
“Getting bett
er.”
“But I put my cards on the table. I told you what I wanted. I made my move.” She moved closer to me and lowered her voice. “And you said you weren’t interested.”
“That’s not what I said.”
“Whatever. You turned me down. Now the only reason why you’re over here is because you see that another man wants me. There’s one thing I don’t do—play games. I’m not the kind of woman to ditch a very nice guy just to run off with someone else. You had your chance, and you didn’t take it.”
I wanted to argue with her, but she put me in my place good. She told me what I deserved to hear. But damn, that made me want her more. I was attracted to her fire, her no-bullshit attitude. I wanted a woman so strong, so confident, that she could turn me down without thinking twice about it. “The only reason why I said no was because of your brother—and we both know that. Believe me, I’m just as interested in you now as I was when I first looked at you.”
“That’s a lame excuse, Ryker. Who gives a shit who my brother is? I’m a grown woman, and he’s a grown man. Who I fuck is none of his concern. But if you aren’t mature enough to understand that, it was never going to work anyway.”
There wasn’t enough time in the day to explain to her what happened with Rae. I didn’t give a shit when she and I started seeing each other. I never cared that Rex was her brother. I didn’t see why it mattered. But it made all the difference in the world. I had to remember not all siblings were the same, that Austen and Liam weren’t nearly as close.
She saw that her date was returning, so she turned to me, a cold expression on her face. “I’ll see you later, Ryker. Have a good night.”
My instinct was to fight for her, but that would make me a bigger jerk. While I hated the guy she was out with it, he did nothing wrong. The only reason why I was in this situation was because I put myself there. “Yeah…you too.”
Chapter Five
Rae left another message.
I didn’t listen to it.
It’d been a month since I left Seattle, and I still didn’t have the balls to talk to her. She was going to assume I left because of her—which wasn’t untrue. The guilt was probably eating her alive, and she just wanted to know I was okay.
But I was still a dick.
I wasn’t going to avoid her forever. Things didn’t work out between us, but that didn’t mean I hated her. I didn’t want to erase the possibility of a friendship—someday. But right now, the sting from her rejection was still too painful.
The last person I expected to text me sent me a message. Call her back. She’s worried about you. It was my old friend, the man who won Rae. He would get to spend the rest of his life with her because he wasn’t stupid like I was. I’d had Rae in my grasp, had her forever, and I threw her away.
I opened a beer and drank half of it before I finally had the courage to call her back. I stared at her name on the screen for a long time before my thumb finally hit the call button. I held the phone to my ear, and she picked up before it even rang.
“Ryker?” Just from saying my name, I could hear all her concern, all her desperation—everything. She inhaled a breath of relief even though she didn’t hear me say a word. She was just grateful I called her back.
Wow. I’m such an ass. “Hey.” I swallowed the lump in my throat, feeling all the pain from that night when she left me forever. I told her to go back to Zeke. After what he did, I didn’t necessarily think he deserved her more than I did. But I could tell she was so madly in love with him that I would never compete. I would always be second best to a man she truly wanted. “I’m sorry I haven’t called.” I didn’t make up an excuse about being too busy. We both knew what the real problem was.
“It’s okay. I’m just glad I’m talking to you now.” She breathed quietly over the phone like she was pacing, probably somewhere in Zeke’s house with Safari watching her from his bed. “When I went to work and they said you stepped down…I was surprised.”
That probably wasn’t the best way for her to find out. “My brother wanted in, so I bowed out.” Just like how I bowed out of our relationship. “There wasn’t anything left for me in Seattle, so I moved back to Manhattan. I never gave up my apartment, so it’s still here.”
“Yeah, I figured that’s where you went.”
I drank my beer then pressed the cool glass to my temple. Silence filled the space between us, awkward and heavy. I knew this woman so well, but I didn’t feel close to her at all. I felt like I lost a piece of myself when she left. “How are things with the gang?” I didn’t ask about Zeke specifically. Honestly, I didn’t really want to know.
“Good. Jessie is pregnant.”
“Good for her. Is Tobias the lucky man?”
“Yep.”
“Tell her congratulations for me.”
“I will.”
“And how’s Rex…?” Probably happy I was gone and Zeke was back with his sister.
“He’s the same—a dumbass.”
An uncontrollable chuckle escaped my lips. “Some things never change, huh?”
“Nope. What about you? What’s it like there?”
It didn’t feel quite like home—at least not yet. “The same as I left it. I’ve been spending a lot of time with friends, going out and hitting the town.”
“Uh-oh,” she said. “I hope the NYPD can handle it.”
I chuckled. “I’ve been behaving myself.”
“Working anywhere?”
“No. I think I’m gonna retire for good.”
“Sounds nice,” she whispered. “Sometimes I think I could do it, but then I realize how bored I would be. I always have to be doing something. I’ve always been that way.”
“You don’t strike me as the stay-at-home type of person.”
“No. Safari would drive me crazy if I were.”
I laughed again. “But he would be happy.”
Her breathing changed, making it seem like she was sitting rather than pacing. “So…any women in your life?”
The question was awkward, but it was bound to come up. It shouldn’t be a taboo topic. She was with Zeke now, and I needed to move on with my life. We were friends—for the most part. “Not really. I met this one woman who’s pretty cool. But I don’t think it’s going to go anywhere.”
“Why not?”
“She’s my friend’s younger sister.”
She laughed like I made a joke. “When has that ever stopped you before?”
An unwilling smile stretched my lips. “I don’t want to go down that path again. A lot of drama.”
“But I’m sure your friend isn’t a weirdo like Rex. He and I are different from other families. We’re freaks, and you know it.”
Their relationship had annoyed me from time to time, but honestly, their closeness made me jealous once in a while. I was never close with my father or my brother. I talked to my mom, but there wasn’t much of a connection there either. There was no bond. “Good freaks.”
“I wouldn’t let that stop you. If you like her, go for it.”
“I waited too long to make a move. She told me I rejected her too many times and now she’s looking for other fish in the sea.”
“Damn,” Rae said. “Sounds like a hardass.”
“She is…but I think that’s why I like her.”
“You’ll wear her down eventually. You’ve got the body for it.”
I smiled at the compliment. “I hope it’s enough for her.”
She chuckled. “If she’s straight, it’ll definitely be enough. Trust me.”
My chest relaxed now that the tension had disappeared. We were talking as friends—like we used to.
“Ryker?”
“Hmm?”
“I don’t expect us to be best friends. But…maybe we can keep in touch?”
I gripped the empty beer in my hand and pictured her face while she spoke. I could practically see her standing right in front of me, those beautiful lips moving as her comforting words came out. “Yeah, I’d like that.
” I knew she still loved me. A part of her always would. But I feared I would always be in this place—being in love with the woman I couldn’t have.
“Cool. Well, I’ll talk to you later…”
“Alright. Tell the gang I said hi.”
“I will. And you better not dodge my calls again, alright?”
My smile dropped when the guilt throbbed in my chest. “You got it.”
***
“Take that, asshole.” Liam hit the buttons on the controller and rammed his car into mine. My vehicle spun out and slammed into the pole on the side of the road. “While you get your tires fixed, I’m headed to the finish line.”
I got my car back on the road and accelerated. I moved through the spaces between the other cars and caught up quicker than he expected. In the nick of time, I passed him and crossed the finish line, taking first place. “Now look who’s the asshole?” I smacked the back of his head.
“Ouch.” He ran his fingers through his hair and massaged the area where I just struck him. “Don’t damage the goods, alright? This is gonna be worth a lot of money someday.”
“Because scientists are going to want to study it to find the true definition of stupidity?”
He smacked me upside the head. “They already got their answer from you.”
I turned off the game and flipped on the TV. “You’re lucky I’m not going to kill you. I feel particularly generous today.”
“Well, you’re lucky I’m more of a pacifist.”
“You mean, pussy.”
“Hell no.” Before he could get more into it, his phone rang. “Hey, Mom. What’s up?”
I heard her voice come through the line. “Hello, dear. We’re having a BBQ and wanted to see if you wanted to stop by. Your sister and her friend Madeline are here.”
“Madeline?” he asked excitedly. “Hell yeah, I’ll be there.”
I smacked his arm and pointed at my chest.
“What?” he mouthed, having no idea what I was asking.
“Ask if I can come,” I whispered. I didn’t want to drop in on a family get-together, but if Austen was there, I wasn’t going to pass up the opportunity.
“Oh.” He turned back to the phone. “Can my friend Ryker come along too? We’re hanging out right now.”
