She walked around in a circle. Not sure which direction to take. Edith could hear the river. Gage had told her on more than one occasion that if she followed it upstream that she would arrive at the shifter village. That theory was about to be tested.
Or not.
A group of four wolves broke from the forest ahead. They were huge. Far bigger than regular wolves, which told her that they were shifters. She looked for a huge bear with golden eyes, for Gage, but he wasn't amongst them. Her heart sank. It looked like she was in deep. Like it or not. A large grey wolf with dark eyes broke from the group, he sprinted to her while the others continued to lope.
Edith looked down, pulling at the tiny skirt, she may as well be naked. Her clothes had been beyond salvageable and the griffins didn't have actual clothing. At least the skirt was something between a skirt and shorts. More like a tiny skirt and underwear. The top was ridiculous; she was spilling out everywhere. She put a hand across her chest, trying to cover up.
The wolf skidded to a halt, its tongue lolling. Its eyes glinting. There was the cracking noise. First the fur receded, together with the claws and jaw. Then everything seemed to tighten and shorten; primarily it's limbs.
Jacob.
Someone she knew. “Edith,” he growled, enveloping her in his arms. “I thought you were dead. Gage told us …” He hugged her tighter. “I’m so glad he was mistaken. I’m so glad to see you.”
“You too.” She meant it, although, not in the same way he did. Edith could barely breathe.
“Are you okay? Did they hurt you?” He pulled back, looking her over.
“I’m fine. A little underdressed but okay.”
“We only just left. The village can’t be more than a fifteen-minute lope from here.” He gave her another quick hug. “Let me change back into my fur and I’ll give you a lift.”
“That would be great.” It was weird to think that she’d been so in lust with Jacob, but that’s all it had been. A crush, an infatuation. Now that she knew what the real thing felt like. At least, something she thought could become real, given time, she felt silly to have ever thought otherwise. Jacob was really nice, but he wasn’t hers. He wasn’t Gage.
She'd made up her mind, Edith was going to tell Gage what she felt for him. If he turned her down, then so be it. At least she would have tried.
You have to see this.” Ash was out of breath as he rounded the corner, gripping the door jamb as he entered the dining area.
"You told me to eat, and I'm eating," Gage snapped, instantly regretting it. He was acting like an asshole. It wasn't Ash's fault he had fucked up and gotten Edith killed. That was a cross he had to bear all on his own. "I'm—" He was about to apologize when Ash slapped him on the back. Hard. The fork flew from his hand. "The fuck!" he growled.
“Leave it and follow me.” Ash was grinning from ear to ear. It was weird, Gage wasn’t used to seeing him like this. Maybe on the day he mated Alice. Or on the day his cubs were born. Definitely when he was playing catch with Ethan. Having that thousand-watt smile directed at him though, was disconcerting.
“What?” Gage asked as he followed Ash. “Slow down I’m still rec—”
No.
Not a fuck.
"Edith?" He wasn't sure if he was seeing correctly. "Edith?" he repeated louder this time. His voice still laced with a good dose of disbelief.
“Gage!” She shouted as she caught sight of him. She pulled away from Jacob. What? The male had his arm around her. His hackles rose. What the fuck was Jacob doing touching his female?
No!
Shit!
No! What was he thinking? She wasn’t his. His stupid lust-riddled brain had almost got her killed in the first place. He would end up hurting her again if they continued. Not that there was a they because there wasn't. Forget about getting her killed; he'd break her heart like he had Savannah's. He was bad news, unable to commit. She wanted kids and a family. She wanted a family home on the lake. Edith deserved all of that. He wasn't even on the goddamned list. It took years to get to the top of that asshole list. In the meanwhile, she’d have to wait. Long distance relationships didn’t work for shit. Even when they were between two people who could actually commit. No! Fuck! His sweet Curls deserved better.
Then she was throwing herself into his arms. Jacob's scent was all over her. All fucking over. He growled low and deep, his chest rumbling. Everything in him told him to take the male down and then to put his scent back on her and to do a proper job this time.
Edith pulled back, she was frowning heavily. “Is everything okay?”
“Everything is great. I’m shocked to see you.” He reached out to touch a lock of her hair but pulled back at the last moment. “I thought … I thought I got you killed, Curls.” His voice dropped low as he fought to control the emotions welling up in him. His nose itched. His eyes stung.
“I told you not to blame yourself,” she all but whispered. Her green eyes wide, locked with his. Filled with emotions he’d rather not decipher.
“He did blame himself though,” Jacob said as he walked up, standing next to her. “Even I blamed him.”
“I knew you would blame yourself.” She ignored Jacob. Score to him! Not that it mattered. “And, I told you not to.” She was smiling broadly. Looking at him with such expectancy.
“How is it that you survived?” He ran a hand through his hair. “I’m so happy to see that you’re okay. I can’t believe it.”
“Someone had better get a fire going because I was right about the griffins having magical powers.”
“No shit! They healed you?”
“Yeah, it’s their feathers. They have healing powers.” She went on to explain how a male called Cadon had saved her and how the magic worked.
She talked and smiled and talked and smiled some more. Gage didn’t want this moment to end. Edith told him all about the griffins’ plans. About how some of their males were loners and that she felt sorry for them. Gage still wanted to hunt the fuckers down and kill them. His Curls was sweet though. Sweet as honey. She forgave so easily. He only hoped she could forgive him too.
The moment came sooner than he wanted. Minutes too soon. Days too soon. A whole lifetime too soon.
"So," she rubbed her toes in the dirt, "I was just on my way to go and see Ana. Figured I'd surprise her since she thinks I died, do you want to come along?" She smiled, but her eyes were sad. Those beautiful green orbs were filled with both hope and sorrow. Like she already knew what his answer would be.
“Thanks, Curls.” He should really stop calling her that. It wasn’t right. “You’re back. No thanks to me, but you’re back safe and sound. It was our deal remember?” It hurt to say the words.
Her eyes widened for a moment. Like she couldn’t quite believe what she had just heard. “Yeah, but …”
“We agreed, Edith.” He had to force out her name.
She cleared her throat and seemed to square her shoulders. Her eyes darted to the side for a moment before returning to his. "Of course." She fake laughed. Others might not realize it was fake but he sure as hell did. That was not her real laugh at all. Then she licked her lips. "I had planned on checking in with Ana and then leaving anyways." She shrugged like it was no biggie. "It's Saturday, right?"
No one answered her.
“Right, Jacob?” She shoulder-tapped him.
“Yep, it sure is.” He smiled at Edith.
"Exactly. I have a show day tomorrow. A house I'm definitely going to sell. I have a job to do. A life to get back to." She looked him straight in the eyes as she said it. Good for her. One part of him felt good that she was going to be fine while another part fucking died inside. "You said you would give me a ride back to Sweetwater." She turned to Jacob, pretty much cutting him off from the conversation.
“Sure, no problem.” Jacob nodded and then nodded some more, reminding Gage of a lovesick puppy. Little ass-wipe obviously didn’t have a clue he was second choice! That wasn’t fair to Jacob. He couldn’t think like
that.
The male grinned at Edith. Again, he was tempted to step in and … No! This was for the best. It was!
“Great.” She clapped her hands. “You can come with me to Ana’s then.” She completely ignored Gage.
What else did he expect? He’d hurt her. It was better this way though. He may have hurt her, but she’d be okay. She’d get over it. Jacob would see to that. “Glad you’re okay.” He turned and walked away before he was tempted to do something stupid.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Ash stepped in next to him. He spoke through clenched teeth.
“Leave me alone.” Gage shrugged out of Ash’s clasp.
“No can do, asshole,” Ash growled beneath his breath. “I was once so in lust with a female that I ignored what was right so that I could have her. I knew you were falling for Savannah. I knew you were making a mistake when you pushed her away. That you would regret it.”
Gage picked up the pace. “I really don’t feel like having this conversation again. Enough already!”
“Oh, we’re going to have this conversation whether you like it or fucking not.”
“Not.” Gage kept walking. He walked right past his house, trying to escape his annoying as fuck brother. “I dumped Savannah because I was no good for her.” Truth. He did care for her and, as it turned out, he did love her, even though he had convinced himself otherwise. It didn’t stop him from getting itchy feet though. It was how he rolled.
“And that’s why you just walked away from Edith? Because you’ve somehow convinced yourself that you’re no good for her?” Ash asked, eyes narrowed.
“Exactly.” Gage pulled in a deep breath. “Only a matter of time before I leave her, so may as well do it now. I guess I’m not much of a shifter in that sense. I can’t mate her. I don’t want to hurt her,” he added the last more to himself.
“I think you’re afraid.”
“Afraid of hurting her?” Gage snarled, coming to a stop so that he could face his brother. “Hell yes!”
Ash’s whole stance softened. “I think you’re afraid that she’ll hurt you. She’s not Savannah.”
“I know that … fuck!”
“It was Savannah who had a problem with commitment. She wasn’t able to commit fully to just one of us. It screwed with your head.”
“Bull!” The word didn’t hold much conviction.
Ash made a growling noise and pursed his lips for a moment. "Hell, it screwed with me just as much. Bottom line, Savannah wanted both of us right from the start, and you knew it. You fell for her long and hard and blindly, and when you realized she still had her sights on me, you dumped her just as hard and fast. Then you jumbled things up in your mind so that you could live with it."
“Edith isn’t like that,” he murmured. “Not that Savannah was a bad person. She was just,” he mussed his hair, squeezed the back of his neck, “she was torn.”
“Savannah was who she was. A free spirit who happened to fall in love with two brothers.” Ash shrugged. “It was a hot fucking mess.”
“Yep, it sure was.”
“Tell me about Edith,” Ash said.
He couldn't help the smile that broke free. It didn't last though; it died a quick-ass death when he remembered that he and Edith were over. That they had never been in the first place. "Edith is amazing. Aside from being so damned beautiful, she’s kind and sweet.” He shook his head. “How do I risk hurting her?”
“I hate to break it to you.” Ash clasped him around the shoulder and gave a squeeze. He let go. “Relationships are full of risks. It’s how it works. It’s why being in one is so amazing. Each day is like a gift that you give to one another. I’m willing to bet you that Edith would rather have one hundred days, a thousand days, than none at all.”
“That’s not how it works at all. It’s all or nothing.” Gage believed in that wholeheartedly. It’s how he’d made himself stay far away from Savannah after she and his brother got together.
“You don’t have commitment issues. You don’t! You need to trust yourself more. Take it slow if you have to.” Ash narrowed his eyes. “You do realize that you just handed your female over to Jacob. You put her on a shiny fucking platter and handed her over. Not very smart, bro. Not smart at all.”
“I’m not on that list.” Anger rolled through him. “She deserves more than one night a month. I can’t do that to her.”
“Did you ever think to ask if she was okay with it?”
Irritation rushed through him. “Did you not hear the part about her being sweet?” He threw the words at Ash. "I decided for her because she'll agree to the long-distance thing and that's not fair."
“You do know that females like making their own decisions about things, right? That they’re quite capable of taking all the facts and—”
“Yes, fuck yes! I want her to be happy though. I’m doing this for her.”
"Spare me the bleeding-heart shit! You're afraid, and you're taking the cowardly route."
“You’re full of shit,” Gage snarled.
“Me?” Ash tapped his chest and grinned. “That’s rich.” He widened his eyes. “If you gave her the opportunity to choose, I have a feeling she’d choose to be with you. That you make her happy. I’m not sure why ‒ you’re a bit of an asshole ‒ and yet I know she’d choose to be with you, no matter what. I know a smitten female when I see one.”
Gage ran a hand through his hair. “What if I get cold feet? It’s what I do. It’s how I roll.”
“We already went over this. Your relationship with Edith is different to the one you had with Savannah. Edith is a completely different person. You made a mistake once, all I’m saying is don’t make the same one again.” Ash blew out a breath through his nose. “You kicked my ass when I couldn’t see what was right in front of me. That I was head over fucking heels in love with Alice. I’m returning the favor. I think you’re far gone. I’m saying it like it is.” His brother put up his hands.
Gage clenched his jaw. He didn’t say anything. His mind raced.
“Also, just so you know,” he pushed a breath out through his nose, “the list is about to be scrapped.”
“What?” Gage couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing.
“It’s about to be scrapped. The whole list concept is ridiculous. It’s stupid. I was against the thing from the start. It’s not working. It’s not how love goes. You can’t tell people when they can and can’t fall in love. It sometimes just happens, and usually when you least expect it.” Ash tapped him on the back. “It just happens, whether you want it to or not. You’ve been bit, bro. I suggest you do something about it.”
“Before she heads off into the sunset with Jacob.” He clenched his jaw.
“Edith doesn’t want Jacob, she wants you. Only has eyes for you.”
"You think so?" He hated that spark of doubt. He'd once been confident almost to the point of arrogance. Savannah had not only knocked him down a few rungs; she'd knocked him flat on his ass. It was clear that he still had to pick himself up a whole lot more.
“I know so. You need to hurry and do something about it quick, because every second you wait, you’ll have to grovel that much longer. She’ll be upset and then she’s going to get mad.”
Gage couldn’t picture Edith mad. He hated to picture her upset. It pissed him off, especially since he was the one to have hurt her.
They began to walk in the direction of Ana’s house. Her heart was beating so hard she was sure her ribs would bruise. No, that’s where she had it wrong, her ribs would be just fine. Her heart on the other hand …
So much for that. She said she would try, and she’d tried. Fat lot of good that had done because she’d failed. But at least she could say that she had tried. Gage, however …
She forced the anger down. He’d never promised more. Although, that wasn’t entirely true. He may not have verbally promised her more, but he had promised her more in other ways. Ways that counted more than words. It was like Cadon had said. He’d promis
ed her more in the way he had touched her, the way he had looked at her. Even that stupid nickname had been a promise of sorts. Curls. The way he had said it had warmed her from the inside out. Had he not noticed how she lit up every time he said it? How she had lit up every time she looked at him?
Why had she let herself fall for him? It had all happened so fast. How was that even possible? She was an idiot. Bottom line!
Jacob touched the side of her arm. “Are you okay?” He sounded concerned.
She glanced his way. “Yeah, why?”
He smiled. There wasn’t nearly as much happiness in the smile as there had been earlier. If anything, there was hesitancy and uncertainty written there. It made her feel worse.
He stopped walking. “Because you’re grinding your teeth.”
“Oh.” She smiled. It wasn’t fair. Jacob was a good guy and she was using him to get back at Gage. “We need to talk.” She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment. “I’m sorry, I—”
“You’re not into me,” he blurted. “I kind of figured.”
“It’s not that there’s anything wrong with you. You’re such a good guy. I find myself wishing I …”
Jacob grasped her arms and leaned in a little, looking her in the eyes. “I know you’re in love with Gage.”
Oh shit! She felt her eyes fill with tears. “Is it that obvious?”
Jacob nodded. “If you have half a brain then, yes, you’d notice.”
She breathed in through her nose trying hard to hold back those asshole tears. “I kind of wish I wasn’t but …” She shrugged.
“Maybe he doesn’t know. Guys can be stupid like that. Maybe …”
She shook her head. “I think he knows. I don’t understand why he’s pushing me away. Maybe it’s one-sided. Maybe I imagined his feelings for me.”
Jacob made a strange noise and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I want to lie right now because I want you for myself, Edith. I want to be the one to swoop in and heal your broken heart. Thing is though, I really do think Gage has feelings for you.”
Unchained (Shifter Night Book 3) Page 15
