I shoved at Zane’s arms, feeling like I’d just given my body to a complete stranger. I had given these men my body, gave over, submitted to them both. I let them shove a plug up my ass and their cocks in my pussy and mouth. I’d given in to the pleasure they knew how to wring from my body. Yet they wouldn’t give everything in return. Zane was holding back and surely Dare knew, surely he could feel it, too.
Zane let me go and I stood on shaky legs, feeling like a newborn kitten. I couldn’t live like this. Not forever. The matching program must have made a mistake. I couldn’t trust Zane with my heart if he was keeping secrets. “I think—I need to go home now.”
Chapter Seven
Hannah
Both warriors jumped to their feet at my words.
“No,” Zane barked at me.
“Why, Hannah? What have we done to upset you?”
I shook my head and wandered the edges of the room, looking for anything I could wear. The sheet that I’d dropped to the floor wouldn’t do for interplanetary travel. I needed to find one of those transporter things and tell them to send me home. I couldn’t deal with their way of life, their secrets. Bad enough that I was expected to fall in love with a warrior who could die at any moment. Zane, my match, was so sure of his impending death, in fact, he chose a second man to take care of me when it inevitably happened? And in the meantime, he kept things from me? My match. I was supposed to give him everything. Surrender myself, body and soul. Yet he was allowed to remain a mystery, to hide the deepest part of himself? What if I accepted his claim, tied myself to him for life, and then found out he was actually freaking crazy? Or insanely jealous? Or abusive.
No. I couldn’t accept Zane with his true self in shadows. I’d made that mistake before, on Earth, and knew it to be insanity. I’d just have to survive long enough to get out of this mess without falling in love with either one of them. “This is a mistake. I’m sorry. I just—I can’t do this. I have to go home.”
Dare looked at Zane, clearly at a loss, and shrugged. Zane tucked his cock back into his pants and frowned. “Hannah, you are home.”
“No.” I glanced around at the strangely colored brownish walls, the window where, even now, stars and galaxies raced by in a never-ending stream of what looked like shooting stars. The furniture was bolted to the floors and the art on the walls depicted landscapes that felt all wrong, with skies that weren’t blue, and two or three moons hanging above the landscape. I wanted a blue sky, and trees, and soft green grass under my bare feet. I wanted chocolate and coffee and a man to love who wasn’t going to go off and do his best to get himself killed tomorrow or the next day, or next week. “I have to go home, back to Earth.”
Zane looked over his shoulder at Dare. “Go prepare a bath for our mate.”
Dare nodded and left me alone with my matched mate, the one perfect man for me in all the universe. The warrior I was destined to lose.
I turned on my heel and picked up the sheet, but before I could put it around my body, Zane’s arms wrapped around me from behind and I was suddenly held with my back to his chest. His muscular arms surrounded me, one at my waist and one at my shoulders. I couldn’t move, and for some bizarre reason I couldn’t explain, even to myself, that calmed me enough to think. Being confined and held securely soothed me.
“Hannah, tell me what’s bothering you. Were we too rough with you? Did we take you too hard?”
I could feel the heat rushing to my face at his question. The answer was no. Not too hard. Not too fast. I’d loved it. It hadn’t been as aggressive as the processing dream, the recorded claiming I’d witnessed, but it had been… amazing.
“No, Zane. You didn’t hurt me.” In fact, I wanted more. I wanted my warriors to dominate my body and make me come over and over. I wanted to give them everything—but I was afraid. That annoying weakness I had for dominant, alpha males was rearing its ugly head. And Zane was truly my match. I could feel the connection between us—and Dare as well—as easily as I could feel his touch on my skin. It was real and solid and so strong already that it felt like a tangible thing between us. I wanted to know everything about my men. I wanted to truly belong to them. I wanted to claim them as mine forever and trust in the matching program, or God, or whatever bizarre twist of fate had brought me to this place, to this warrior. I wanted to fall head over heels in love with both of them and hold nothing back. Nothing. And that was the problem. I would give them everything, heart, mind and soul, and it wasn’t going to be enough. Zane’s darkness spread, his discontent coming through my collar as clearly as a bell ringing inside my head. I wasn’t enough for him. I wasn’t enough, and he just couldn’t bring himself to tell me.
“Hannah, talk to me, or I will have you over my knee.”
I squirmed at his threat, my bottom still sore from its earlier spanking and the plug still filling me. I knew he wasn’t making idle threats. I sighed, and decided I might as well tell him the truth, or at least as much of it as I could. His darkness and the hurt it caused me? I had some pride. That I would keep to myself. “I can’t be your mate, Zane. I’m sorry. I know the computer or whatever matched us, but I can’t do this.”
“You fear our deaths. I can sense your sadness, Hannah, your fear. We’re all going to die, Hannah. Death is part of life. Is it our death you fear, or is it me? Do you wish to test another? Are you invoking your right to claim a new mate?” His voice was soft, deathly quiet, and I heard Dare’s quiet footsteps as he approached from behind, listening to our conversation.
“No. I don’t want another warrior.” His grip loosened slightly and I took a deep breath. “I don’t want to be a bride. I want to go home.” I spoke from the heart, and I knew he’d hear the sincerity of my words. I couldn’t allow myself to fall in love with him. It would be a complete disaster. The idea of a perfect love, of an intense, all-consuming love, was exciting and fun and something every woman on Earth dreamed about. The reality of knowing I’d lose one of them, or both, was too intense, too much for me, especially when I knew Zane was hiding from me, that he wasn’t going to love me in return. I was scared. A chicken. I admitted it, didn’t try to deny it.
The silence grew heavy and thick in the air as I waited for his response. If I gave them everything, and one of them died, I wouldn’t survive it. I’d crumble into a million tiny pieces of dust and drift away on the wind. Faced with the very real possibility of having the kind of man I’d always wanted, the kind I could completely lose myself in, I was terrified. They would own me. Body and soul. I would belong to them, but Zane? I could sense the shadow in him, and it was growing stronger. He would hide forever. I could feel his determination through our link. And he was the commander, the most disciplined warrior in the entire interstellar fleet. If he decided to hold himself apart, there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it. He would never truly belong to me. I couldn’t live with that.
Two beeps filled the air. “Commander.”
Zane stiffened behind me. “Yes,” he said to the room at large.
“You are needed on the command deck.” The room had some kind of ship-wide communication system.
“On my way. Deston out.”
Dare cleared his throat. “Her bath is ready.”
Zane sighed. “We’ll discuss this later, Hannah.” His arms tightened for a brief moment before he turned with me in his arms and handed me off to Dare.
Dare nodded and Zane left the room without another word. I knew I’d hurt him somehow, wounded the most formidable commander in the Prillon fleet. But he’d asked for the truth. The truth that I was petrified to be permanently tied to him and then have him die on me, or live, but never be mine. Either possibility brought me nothing but heartbreak.
“Come, Hannah. There is nowhere for you to go. Let’s set your fears aside for now. Let me help you in the bath.” Dare held out his hand and I took it, allowing him to lead me through the small door I’d glimpsed off to the side of the main room. He was right. Where was I to go? I had no clothes, no way t
o get home. I could tell Dare was trying to soothe me; I was overwhelmed. The conversation wasn’t over. My concerns hadn’t been resolved, but I would wait. A bath did sound good. I was sticky and sore.
It was odd to walk with the plug deep inside me. “Dare,” I said, looking anywhere but at him. “What about… um, well…”
Perhaps he had an idea as to my problem or perhaps he could sense it through the collars.
“The plug stays in. It is a training plug, not a pleasure plug.”
I frowned, for I didn’t know the difference between the two, but I could tell by the look on his face that he would not be swayed. I sighed and took in the bathroom. It wasn’t huge, but it was luxurious, with glowing white fixtures that looked like they were made of fire opals lit from within. A full tub of water awaited me. The bath was huge, large enough to easily fit two, if not all three of us. Dare tugged the sheet from my body and stripped off his uniform to reveal a chest lined with muscles, a broad strong back that tapered to thin hips and powerful legs. His cock hung, still semi-hard between his legs, the sight reminding me of his taste, of the flavor of his cum as it spilled down my throat.
“Stop looking at me like that, Hannah, or I’ll fuck that sweet mouth again.” In one fast motion, he lifted me off my feet and stepped into the warm water, immersing us both up to our shoulders in the scented bath.
Pressed to his naked chest, I could smell him, his scent rising from his skin to soothe me. I’d known him such a short time, but already my body recognized his. I knew the taste of his cock and the scent of his flesh. I craved the taste of his cum, like a drug addict on Earth and the next fix. I was losing it. That was the only explanation.
Dare settled me in front of him in the bath and bathed my entire body with a strange soap that smelled like some exotic fruit as soon as it made contact with my skin. On his hand, it smelled like him, a dark, musky fragrance that made me want to press my face to his chest and just breathe him in and out of my body.
“Lean back, Hannah. I want to wash your hair.” His voice seemed to invade my senses and give me a sense of comfort and safety.
I felt like a child in the swimming pool as he pulled my head back with his hands and pushed my bottom away from him so that I floated on my back in the water. He held me gently as he soaked my hair, then sat me up to massage my scalp. It felt so good I let myself go limp in his arms. I was tired and overwhelmed, and his gentle touch soothed something inside me that I hadn’t realized needing soothing.
I was still trying to wrestle with the idea of two mates, but the idea was not as out of bounds as I’d once thought. Not if my mates were Zane and Dare. However, it wasn’t loving them that scared the hell out of me. No, I was afraid of losing them. But even if I could force myself to face that fear, I had another fear, a darker, much more frightening one—not being loved back, not being enough for my matched mate. It wouldn’t be the first time a man found me lacking.
Dare finished with me and lifted me from the tub to wrap me in a plush gray towel. He dried himself, then tended to my hair with another, squeezing the wet ends until I stopped dripping on the floor.
“Come, Hannah.” He looked like a sexual god with his towel hung low over his waist and I couldn’t stop staring as I placed my small hand in his much larger one. “Are you hungry? We’ll get dressed and I’ll take you to the dining hall.”
“I don’t have any clothes.” I’d worn nothing but a sheet since my arrival. How was I supposed to go out in public like this?
“Trust me.”
I followed him back into the main living quarters and he led me to a small black platform in the far corner. The base was covered with a grid made of green lines. Dare walked to me and leaned down to give me a soft, sweet kiss.
“Take off the towel and stand in the center. The ship will measure you and create whatever you need.”
His soft voice and gentle kiss settled me and I felt like a contented kitten as I allowed him to remove my towel. I stepped naked onto the platform and held still as an array of soft green lights scanned every inch of my body. My collar tingled and buzzed and I froze at the strange sensation. When the lights disappeared, Dare held out his hand and I stepped down with my fingers on my collar. “What was that? It buzzed.”
“That was the collar communicating directly with the ship’s systems. Your identification and measurements have been updated in the ship’s S-Gen.”
“S-Gen?” So much weird stuff to learn. I truly felt out of my depth as the now empty platform lit up with bright green light that was concentrated at the base. I couldn’t tear my eyes from the spectacle and when the lights were gone, a lump of fabric lay on the platform.
“Spontaneous matter generator.” Dare bent over and picked up the fabric. When he lifted it for me, I saw that it was a knee-length tunic of some sort with strange leggings connected beneath it. Dare handed it to me and I discovered that it was open in the back. I stepped into the leggings and pulled it up, shoving my arms into the long sleeves. As soon as I had it on, the material closed itself in the back, fitting me like a second skin. Dare looked me over, his gaze lingering on the slightly scooped neckline that prominently displayed my collar. His attention drifted down to my breasts and waist, to the slightly flared skirt that fell almost to my knees. Beneath that, the leggings covered me completely to my ankles and my bare feet looked oddly out of place.
Dare pressed his hand to an indentation on the side of the S-Gen. “Boots for Lady Deston.” At his command, the green light returned, leaving a pair of matching boots that would cover me to just above the ankle. He held them out and I slid my feet into them. I thought they would feel odd without socks, but the boots contracted around my feet just like the clothing had around my body and they were soft as silk on the inside.
Deston ordered clothing for himself as well and put on a fresh uniform and boots before taking both of our towels and my sheet and rolling them up in his hands. He pressed a small button in the wall next to the S-Gen unit and a drawer slid out from the wall. He dropped the towels and sheet inside, then gathered his discarded uniform and boots from the bathing room and dropped everything inside before closing it. A bright green light leaked from the edges of the drawer and I tilted my head to watch.
“That’s the reclaiming unit. All matter is reduced to its base form and reused by the system.”
I thought about it for a moment, looking around the room. There were no drawers for clothes, no boots on the floor, no half-eaten food on the small table next to the bed. “You use everything once and recycle it?”
He smiled. “Yes. The subatomic particles that made your towel might be used to create shoes tomorrow, or a bowl of soup the day after that. Everything onboard the ship is recycled this way. No one goes hungry. No one goes thirsty. No one suffers from poverty. As long as the ship has energy, we can create anything we need.”
Holy freaking wow. I looked down at my new clothes. They were great, but I had one little problem. I’d worn leotards and other one-piece articles of clothing many times, and they were a complete pain in the ass when it came time to use the restroom.
Come to think of it, I hadn’t seen a toilet in the bathing room. I looked around. There didn’t appear to be one anywhere. I hadn’t needed one yet, so it had slipped my mind. Which seemed weird, and wrong. Was there something wrong with me after all? Had the transport messed up my kidneys or something?
“What is it, mate? You can ask me anything.” Dare lifted his hand to my cheek and I held still, allowing his touch. Already, he felt so familiar. Easier to deal with than Zane. But, for some reason, I was worried about the commander. He was so hard, so strong. He had so many people, a whole fleet of warriors, relying on his strength and I’d hurt his feelings. Little old me, Hannah Johnson, preschool teacher from Earth. I’d wounded the mighty commander with a few honest words.
Great. No toilet, and now I felt like a heartless bitch. This was just getting better and better. I sighed. I might as well ask Dare now, no mat
ter how embarrassing it was to talk about. “I don’t see a toilet.”
Dare wrinkled his brow. “I don’t understand, and my stims have no word for that. What do you need?”
Holy shit. Was I really going to have to explain it to him? I felt my cheeks grow hot, and this time it wasn’t from arousal, it was just plain embarrassment. “You know, a place to go when you need to get rid of your body’s natural waste? Don’t you guys ever have to, you know, empty your bladder?”
Understanding dawned on his handsome face and he actually laughed at me, which both pissed me off and made my face feel even hotter. “Didn’t Doctor Mordin explain this to you?”
“Explain what?”
“Everything is sent to the S-gen reclamation system. Even your body’s biological waste.”
“How?” What the hell was he talking about?
“Do you feel the need to empty your bladder?”
I thought about it for a moment, taking stock of how I felt. “No.”
He smiled, looking relieved. “Good. You had me worried, mate. But it appears the implants placed during your medical exam are working properly.”
“Implants?”
“Yes. During your processing, your internal waste systems were implanted with reclamation devices. This is done to our children at birth. The system will clean your blood, as well as transport and remove all waste from your body as it is generated.”
Holy hell. I would never have to use the bathroom again? “So, I’ll never have to—you know—ever?”
“Not unless you travel outside the range of the ship’s system. If you were to explore a new world, and lose contact with our system, then your body’s old biological processes would still function normally.”
Weird. Not that I would miss that particular task, but I suddenly felt like an alien. Or a robot. Or something weird and not human. My hands were shaking a bit as I smoothed the front of my plain uniform.
Mated to the Warriors Page 8
