by Lisa Cardiff
“It was about time Dierdre did something maternal. She finally put you first. That shows you that despite all her faults she loved you.”
Avery rolled to face him, still cradled in his arms. “It was my fault.”
They were so close Avery could feel the rhythm of his breath on her face. His hand, still under her shirt, moved up and down her back, his fingers tracing the bumps of her spine and her breathing hitched. “None of this is your fault. This situation was in the making long before you were born. You’re just an unfortunate pawn in all of this.”
Kalen’s eyes transfixed hers, and Avery placed her hand on Kalen’s chest, slowly moving it to his shoulder then around to the back of his neck. “I don’t want to be a pawn. I—”
He put his finger over her lips to silence her, and she froze. Watching her eyes, he traced her lips with his finger.
She didn’t fight him. He pushed his hand through her hair and cupped one side of her face. Leaning in, he closed the gap separating them, and his lips met hers.
His lips were whisper-soft against hers, his mouth moving patiently with a clear invitation for her to respond. She tried to hold herself unmoving in his embrace. Her hands moved to his chest with the intention of pushing him away, but somewhere between the thought to push him away and the corresponding movement, the push became a caress.
She opened her lips, and his tongue took advantage, pressing inside her mouth. The slow embers that had been burning since their last kiss flared to life. She forced her mind to quiet, ignoring what she should do in favor of doing what her body wanted, promising herself she would stop soon.
His hands started moving igniting every nerve ending in her body, and her promise to stop was lost as she desperately pulled him closer to her. Feeling her surrender, he pulled her hips to meet his. She gasped at the sensation of being so close to him.
His lips left her mouth, trailing kisses along her cheek and then down her neck. She was lost in the sensation of kissing him. Intoxicated by his smell and the salty taste of his skin, she barely noticed when he slipped her pants down her legs then unbuttoned her shirt. Not wasting any time, he unclasped her bra and pushed it aside.
Beautiful.
Avery pulled her lips away from Kalen’s and traced the upturn of his mouth. She knew he hadn’t spoken yet she had clearly heard his voice. Kalen raised an eyebrow, questioning her pause. She knew he sensed her hesitation and uncertainty, but he quickly distracted her by grazing her golden skin with his teeth, biting her softly. He turned so he hovered above her, his hands pressing into the bed above her shoulders. When he ran his hand down her body, brushing the side of her breast, she forgot her uncertainty and hitched her body into him.
His mouth trailed down her stomach, making her shiver with anticipation. He changed course, and his tongue caressed her hipbone. He slid his hands underneath her and pulled her panties down her long legs, his mouth following in its wake. She reached down, threading her hands in his thick hair, trying to pull him back to her mouth. He looked up, appraising her and moved his body over hers, touching her skin lightly, each point of contact making her body burn with desire.
He let out a faltering sigh and said, “Do you want this? Do you want to be with me?” Between his questions, his lips continued to devour her. His hands moved freely, caressing her body, unable to get enough of her.
Shuddering in response to his need, she ignored his questions, afraid answering might bring her conscience back to life, and then she would have to acknowledge being with Kalen—a person she knew nothing about—was a bad idea; not just bad, but potentially self-destructive. She ran her hands down his pectoral muscles to his narrow waist and let her hands linger just under the waistband of his pants. She drew her hand back then unbuttoned his pants, pushing them down his hips.
When she resumed her exploration of his body, he stopped the descent of her hand and held her wrist firmly in his grasp. “Say you want this, that you want me.”
She froze, watching his eyes as they bored into her, demanding an answer. Again, she tried to look away, but he reached to cup her face, so she had to look at him; she had to face that this was real. “Please…” she whispered, her voice thick with longing. He released her wrist, and she let her hand slide down his stomach again. “I need this.” She didn’t want to breathe. She was so afraid he would reject her when she desperately needed to feel connected and safe for a while longer.
“I know,” he said, taking off the rest of his clothes. Kalen hooked one of her legs around his hips and pulled her arms above her head, holding them with his other hand.
He didn’t wait any longer to push inside her, and as he moved, they locked eyes. She felt the mental connection with him she always tried to ignore dance to the surface. She didn’t want that right now. It was too complicated—too meaningful. She turned her head to the side and forced her eyes closed.
Avery, don’t you dare shut me out.
At the sound of his voice in her head, her eyes opened and she was immediately sucked into another world where only she and Kalen existed. Lost in the magic touch of his hands, his mouth, and his body, it felt as though the earth had tilted on its axis. Trancelike, she concentrated on his movements and the feeling of him inside of her as he watched her with a look of wonder. When she realized they were both close to climax, she moved with a desperate hunger, pressing her arching hips against his pelvis while flames of sensation rocked through her, exploding into a pure paradise like nothing she had experienced before.
A shudder raced through Kalen’s body and then he collapsed on top of her, burying his face in the side of her neck as he tried to regain his composure and catch his breath. He felt her body shaking, so he moved onto his side to look at her face. Her eyes were glossy, and when he reached out to push her hair from her face, she started sobbing. His hands froze in her hair, and he murmured, “Are you okay?”
Nodding, she rolled to her side and curled into a ball.
“Did I hurt you?”
Between her sobs, she let out a startled laugh. “I’m tired. Can I just sleep awhile?”
Kalen moved behind her and pulled her back against his chest. She tried to wrench free, but he held her tight with his hand wrapped around her stomach. She stopped struggling and whispered, “I don’t want to be touched right now. I just want to be alone.” Feeling her request was a little harsh, she quickly mumbled, “I’m sorry.”
Kalen sighed in frustration. “No, you need to be held. You’ll fall asleep faster. You shouldn’t be alone.”
She closed her eyes and quickly fell asleep.
Kalen tapped his fingers on the kitchen countertop as he waited for someone to answer the phone in the Queen’s chambers. After leaving enough voicemails in the last ten hours to fill his inbox, he could hardly hide his growing frustration with Aerin and the Queen.
After six rings, Aerin’s voice reached through the phone, and he gritted his teeth.
“Aerin, it’s me. Please put the Queen on the phone.”
“She’s indisposed at the moment, but you can talk to me.”
“No. I need to talk to her. You can’t help me.”
“The Queen authorized me to talk in her absence.” The shrillness in Aerin’s voice was uncharacteristic, but Kalen dismissed it.
“That’s not going to work for me. Look at her schedule and give me a better time to call.”
“I don’t know, it looks as though she’ll be unavailable for some time, so tell me what’s going on, and I’ll relay your message.”
Kalen rolled his eyes. Obviously, Aerin shouldn’t be involved in this matter on any level. If she thought she had fooled anyone into believing she didn’t hold a grudge against Avery or Cian, she was truly delusional. Tapping his fingers on the counter again, he was tempted to hang up the phone. Just before he did so, he heard the Queen’s voice over the line, and he pulled the phone back his ear. “It sounds like she’s available now. Put her on the phone.”
“Fine.” Aerin resp
onded. He heard Aerin and the Queen’s muffled voices in the background, but he couldn’t make out any of the words.
Without warning, the Queen’s voiced echoed in his ear. “Kalen, I was becoming increasingly concerned you had abandoned the mission.”
Given his mood and all that had transpired in the past few days, he thought the Queen’s flair for the dramatic was downright adolescent. Dealing with the Queen and Aerin on this mission was grating on his nerves and further cementing his opinion that the Queen had outlived her usefulness. He was beginning to sympathize with the faction of Court that wanted to overthrow her.
Trying to hide his growing aggravation with her, he responded flippantly. “I’m wounded that you think so little of me.”
Queen Donagh’s brittle laughter nearly pierced his eardrum, and he briefly pulled the phone away from his ear. “Oh, don’t play coy with me. Why didn’t you check in earlier? I trusted you with this mission and I don’t want to discover that you have been pursuing your own agenda to the detriment of the Tuatha Dé.”
Ignoring the comment about pursuing his own agenda, he responded, “I’m doing exactly what you and the Court entrusted me to do. I have been trying to recover Aver—ah—Ashling and escort her back to the compound.”
“You told me you already recovered her. You should be back here by now if you were telling the truth.”
Kalen leaned his hip against the corner of the kitchen counter and ran his free hand through his hair. “Yes, I thought I would be back there already. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out like that, but I’ve located her and I should be back within the next couple of days depending on the window opening between the dimensions.”
“What do you mean you located her? Do you have her or not?”
“She’s with me right now.”
“You mean next to you?”
“No. She’s asleep in the other room.”
“I know you can be persuasive when you want, but I didn’t think she would sit there listening to you without any reaction. Did you check into a hotel?”
Kalen hesitated. He didn’t want to share too much information. “No. I found a house where we’ll stay for a few days.”
“Why don’t you crossover tonight? Why are you waiting?”
Kalen lowered his voice and looked to the door of the bedroom where Avery still slept. “Humans can’t crossover until the window to the Faerie Realm is fully open or they will die.”
“She isn’t completely human.”
“She isn’t completely Fae either and I don’t think either of us wants to risk harming the girl when we’re so close. It would be safer to cross in few days. ”
“It’s unlikely she would have any problem crossing over, but I don’t think there’s any harm in waiting a few more days. Do you think you’ll be safe with the Foundation sniffing around?”
“I have everything under control.”
“Isn’t that what you said before? You already lost Ashling once. Do you really have her now or are you trying to give yourself a few more days to find her.”
“What do you mean I lost her? Who told you that?”
“Aerin mentioned she escaped.”
“How would Aerin know? I didn’t tell her Ashling escaped. I let her wander a bit, but I knew where she was and she’s with me now. That’s all that matters.”
The Queen didn’t respond immediately. The phone line crackled with tension as the silence lengthened. “Are you sure you didn’t tell Aerin about Ashling escaping?”
“I’m absolutely sure. Other than talking to her when she answered the phone today, I haven’t communicated with her since I took Ashling to the safe house outside of Tuam.”
“But you did lose her, right?”
“She left the safe house when I called to make a report. I located her again within a few hours.”
“Did you tell anyone else Ashling escaped?”
“Absolutely not. You and Aerin are my only contacts.”
“Did Ashling communicate with the Foundation or anyone else?”
“She said she called one of her friends who works at the Foundation, but she didn’t meet him. I believe her. I saw her leave the meeting place before the designated time.”
Sounding unconvinced, the Queen said, “I don’t think you should put your faith into Ashling so easily. Whether willing or not, she has been under the Foundation’s influence for nearly her entirely life. If you suspect she’s a puppet, you need to kill her. That’s what we decided. We can’t take unnecessary risks.”
“I understand the perimeters of the mission,” Kalen snapped. “I’m just curious whether Aerin does.”
“Aerin would never do anything to jeopardize the mission. I trust her. She probably assumed you lost the girl because you didn’t show as expected or she picked up some static from the Foundation.”
“I suppose that’s possible, but I’m not entirely convinced Aerin is trustworthy with anything relating to Ashling. I have a feeling someone is leaking information to the Foundation. Perhaps you should consider—”
“That’s not your call,” the Queen said, interrupting him. “She’s a part of the team until I decide otherwise.”
“Fine. It’s your call for now,” Kalen responded curtly. “I need to get off the phone and make sure the girl doesn’t leave again. If all goes as planned, I will see you in a few days with the girl.” Kalen disconnected the phone before the Queen could question him any further about his location or about what happened when Avery disappeared.
Avery rolled onto her back and pried open her eyes. Her vision came into focus, and she found herself staring at the ceiling of an unfamiliar bedroom. Panic settled deep into her gut, and the need to flee overwhelmed her. She scrambled to the edge of the bed, letting her feet dangle over the side when her memories caught up with her. Every detail of the previous night flashed through her mind in vivid, living color.
Covering her face with both of her hands, she couldn’t stifle the moan of regret and humiliation that floated involuntarily out of her mouth. What was she thinking? It didn’t make any sense that she succumbed to his advances. She wasn’t even sure she was attracted to him. No, that was a lie. It wasn’t debatable whether she was attracted to Kalen, that was evident, but that didn’t mean she liked him. Well, maybe she couldn’t claim to dislike him either, but she didn’t know him and being intimate with someone was not something she took lightly. She only had sex with one other person in college, and even though she tried to make the relationship work, she never felt much of anything for him other than a slight companionship. What happened with Kalen last night could only be explained as a reaction to the devastation and confusion that had plagued her from the moment she heard Dierdre was dying.
Pulling the sheet around her and grasping it in one hand to ensure she remained fully covered, she bent to pick up her clothing that had been carelessly tossed on the floor last night. She studied each piece she had borrowed from Dierdre’s wardrobe, dreading sliding back into the dirty, ill-fitting clothing.
A door in the corner of the room caught her eye. She opened it to see if she could find any clothes. She found five or six men’s shirts and pants. She fingered them, trying to decide if she could use them for herself. When she pulled out a plain blue shirt, she noticed a floral patterned material neatly folded on a shelf. Replacing the blue shirt on the hook, she grabbed the floral patterned item. When she shook it free, she saw that it was a dress in nearly her size. It smelled musty, but it would work. Stacked neatly underneath the dress were several more women’s items, including a sweater, robe, underwear, two pairs of hopelessly outdated pants, and a silk shirt.
She shook out the robe, dropped the sheet to the floor, and slid it on, firmly tying the belt in a knot. Grabbing the sweater and a pair of paints, she peaked out of the door of the room looking for a bathroom. She hoped this place had running water unlike the other house because she really needed a warm shower.
When she heard the hushed tones o
f Kalen’s voice, she paused in the doorway, afraid someone else was in the house. She scanned the dim interior of the living room and the entrance to what she assumed was the kitchen. She didn’t see anyone so she scrambled to the adjacent door that opened to the bathroom and slammed door, locking it behind her. She pulled the cracked plastic shower curtain back and turned the shower lever. When she heard the moan of pipes and saw the stream of water hit the shower pan, she nearly shrieked with delight. It was the first victory she had in days, and although it was a small one, it made her feel as if she could handle whatever this day brought.
Kalen watched Avery come out of the bathroom. Her long hair was wet and finger-combed into some semblance of order. She looked refreshed, and she seemed to be in a good mood. Fearing how she would react to what happened between them in the early hours of the morning, he had let her sleep as long as possible, effectively delaying a confrontation between the two of them.
“I see you found some clothes in the closet. They fit you well.”
Avery paused, a hot blush staining her face when she heard his voice. She hastily trained her eyes to the wall above his head to avoid looking at him and he smiled faintly.
“Um, ah, yes,” she stammered. “I hope you don’t mind that I borrowed them. I couldn’t stand the thought of wearing the same clothes for one more day.”
“I’m not the owner of the clothing,” he teased, “so I don’t have a say in whether you wear them.”
“I realize they are not yours, but pass along my thanks.” Her eyes darted to his and she looked away quickly. She sat stiffly in the corner of the sofa facing away from Kalen.
“I’m sure she wouldn’t mind if you borrowed her things. They’re technically yours now anyway.”
Noticeably confused, Avery said, “What do you mean?”
“Those are Dierdre’s clothes. This was where Dierdre and Cian lived before you were born and for a while afterwards.”
Avery’s mouth hung open. She blinked, staring him. “No,” she said in a hushed voice.
He moved to the sofa, sat down, and pulled her legs across his lap. Her face and mind were blank, so he was unable to determine her thoughts. He felt her tense at the contact, but he ignored her response and rested his hands on top of her legs. Tilting his head to the side to study her, he asked, “What are you thinking?”
