by Amy Vansant
“Wait.” She sat up. “No one died on this bed, did they?”
“No. That’s a new one,” said Declan, flipping through the receipts. “It’s a guest bed of someone who never had any guests. Under the new sheets I put on it there’s still plastic.”
She bounced up and down and heard the crinkling of plastic.
“Good.” She flopped back down.
“Did the cat carrier fit?” he asked.
“I guess so. Auntie Carolina is back in Michigan and Mr. Coppertone the naked cat went with her. She couldn’t bear to leave him behind and I didn’t really need a cat, so it all worked out for the best.”
Declan walked over and laid down next to her. “On the upside, looks like Blade hasn’t killed anyone yet. He seems to be doing a great job. Even though I can’t figure him out. I had a customer gush about him. Him.”
“He’s a strange fellow.”
“That’s one way to put it. Did you see what he was wearing? A red polo shirt two sizes too large and dayglow orange cargo shorts.”
“I saw! What’s up with that?”
“It’s his new work uniform, apparently. I told him not to wear t-shirts, so he returned in a tank top, and when I shot that down he wore the giant polo-tent. I’m terrified to tell him that doesn’t work either, for fear he’ll show up wrapped in human skin.”
They heard the sound of someone clearing their throat and sat bold upright.
Blade was standing at the foot of the bed.
“Blade!” said Declan. “I thought you’d left!”
“Had to hit the head,” he said, thumbing toward the bathroom in the back.
“Okay, well, you can go now. Use the back door. I already locked up the front.”
He nodded and shuffled off.
“Do you think he heard us?” whispered Charlotte.
Declan sighed. “I don’t know. How did he get to the foot of the bed without us seeing him?”
Charlotte chuckled. “Hey, I have a question for you.”
“Uh oh.”
“Why do you think Stephanie is so obsessed with you?”
He held up a hand. “Isn’t it obvious?”
She slapped him lightly on the chest. “Seriously.”
He sighed. “I don’t know. We grew up together. I knew she had this, I don’t know, awful side to her, but for some reason she never used her powers of evil against me. She was bullied in school and the fact that she retaliated tenfold didn’t help. But I thought she was smart and funny and we got along.”
“Until you dated.”
“Until we dated. I should have seen that coming. But even then, I dunno...”
“What?”
“It’s like she didn’t really want to blow things up but she had to.”
“Do you think she thinks you’re the only person who appreciates the real her?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. Why are we talking about Stephanie anyway?”
“Because something is fishy. I can’t stop thinking about how everything happened. With Lester the most likely person to be Alex and Steph’s mom being the Puzzle Killer; something isn’t right and I know Stephanie knows more than she’s telling.”
“I think that’s always the case with her.”
“Lester was tiny. How did he get that enormous alligator in that pool?”
“I guess he had help. What about the guy in the barrel next to him you told me about?”
“Maybe. But what’s the connection between Lester and Jamie?”
“Maybe the other guy is the connection. Maybe he’s Alex and Lester relayed his messages to Stephanie?”
“Maybe they’re both Jamie’s victims. Maybe neither one is Alex. Anyone could be Alex...”
Declan rolled on his side to face Charlotte. “I hate it when you trail off like that. What are you thinking now?”
“I’m wondering if Stephanie would ever kill someone.”
“What?”
“Seriously. Do you think she could kill someone?”
“I—” He sighed. “My first instinct is to say no, of course. But, I guess I’d have to know the circumstances of this hypothetical murder situation.”
“How about a situation where her mother abandons her as a baby and then shows up years later as the Puzzle Killer?”
“You think Stephanie is Alex? She killed people to catch her mother’s attention?”
“You have to admit, she has more motive than—”
Declan put his arm over her and kissed her on the lips.
“Sshhh,” he mumbled.
“But don’t you—”
He kissed her again, lingering. Charlotte felt her body relax as his hand traced the side of her body.
“So you’re saying I need to let it go?” she whispered.
He nodded. “Let the cops look into things. They’ll find the connection between Lester and Jamie eventually.”
Charlotte sighed. “I guess you’re right.”
Declan kissed her again and stood. He held out his hand to help her up. “Anyway, if anyone killed anyone around here, it has to be Blade,” he said.
“Blade is Alex! Of course!” she said, letting him pull her to her feet.
“I mean, come on. Nobody that odd named Blade is not a killer.” Declan wrapped her into a hug. “He’s probably got bodies stacked at home like—”
The sound of a throat clearing echoed through the store. They whipped their gazes toward the sound and found Blade standing four feet from them.
“Blade!” yelped Declan, his voice cracking. “What are you doing here?”
“Forgot my lunch kit,” he said, holding up an old metal lunch box.
Charlotte found herself transfixed by the metal box in Blade’s hand. Painted on the side, three grinning, disembodied women’s heads floated over the title Charlie’s Angels.
“See you tomorrow, boss.” Blade turned to leave. After a moment, they heard the backdoor click shut behind him.
“How long do you think he was there?” whispered Charlotte. She could feel giggles building inside of her.
Declan shook his head. “The next time I get the idea to hire someone, kick me, will you?”
THE END
Look for the next Pineapple Port novel coming winter 2016!
Thank you for taking time to read Pineapple Puzzles! If you enjoyed it, please consider telling your friends or posting a review on Amazon or GoodReads or wherever you like to roam. Word of mouth helps poor starving authors so much!
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Amy specializes in fun, comedic reads about accident prone, easily distracted women with questionable taste in men.
So, autobiographies, mostly.
Amy is the former East Coast Editor of SURFER Magazine but the urge to drive up and down the coast interviewing surfers has long since left her. Currently, she is a nerd and Labradoodle mommy who works at home with her goofy husband.
She has rocked water aerobics at a fifty-five and over community, but has yet to play serious bingo. She’s heard it’s vicious.
Other Books by Amy Vansant
Pineapple Lies (Pineapple Port Mystery: Book I)
Pineapple Mystery Box (Pineapple Port: Book II)
Slightly Stalky (romantic comedy)
Angeli (funny/dark urban fantasy adventure)
Cherubim (Angeli Book II)
The Magicatory (middle-grade fantasy)
Moms are Nuts (editor: humor anthology)
The Surfer’s Guid
e to Florida (non-fiction: out of print)
