Jordan ran his fingers through his hair. “What now? I already asked that Andrews chit to dance last night. Deuced difficult, by the by. She flatly refused me at first. Seems she’s only got eyes for the Eggleston lad. Must admit it was a bit of a blow to my ego. I never ask eighteen-year-olds to dance and if I do I expect them to say yes.” He grinned.
“Yes, well, it’s the Andrews girl and the Eggleston lad I’ve come about.”
Jordan raised a brow.
“Seems they’ve run off to Gretna. I’m leaving now to track them down. I expect they’ve taken the road through Leicester but I need you to take the other road just in case.”
“A trip to Gretna?” Jordan whistled.
“I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important, and after the trouble you caused me with that blasted bet, you owe me.”
Jordan nodded once. “I’ll leave immediately.”
“I assume they won’t travel through the night. Given that they probably left early this morning, if we leave now, with our faster horses, we’ll most likely catch up to them at the Gray Horse Inn. If you come around and meet us there tomorrow night, we should be able to track them down.”
Another nod. “Consider it done. With utter discretion.”
Devon turned to leave. He and Jordan might have their differences from time to time but he could count on him completely. That, he never doubted. “See you tomorrow night.”
Devon returned to the coach, pulled himself inside, and ordered George to start the journey immediately. Then, he settled into the seat across from Lily.
She watched him intently. “Where did you go?”
“To cover all possibilities.”
Lily shook her head at that cryptic answer. “Why do I think I’m going to regret not bringing Mary with us?”
“Mary is needed in London.”
Lily sighed. “You know she’s not going to remember a word you told her. I didn’t want the poor thing to have to endure the treacherous conditions on the road to Gretna or I would have insisted she accompany us.”
“It’ll be faster with just the two of us. Now, you should get some sleep. It’s going to be a very long journey.”
Lily glanced away at his obvious implication that she needed the sleep because she hadn’t gotten much of it the night before. Her cheeks burned. The memory of their night together was a specter in the carriage with them. Should she be embarrassed? Regretful? No, she was neither of those things.
The truth was, she desperately wanted to repeat it. Memories assaulted her mind. Images. Devon’s taut skin, his musky scent, his broad, smooth shoulders under her fingers. Yes, she should be embarrassed. Or perhaps ashamed. But she could summon neither emotion. The only thing she felt was a soft, warm glow. God, yes, she wanted to repeat it. One more time. Completely sober. To see if it was as good as she remembered.
Lily shook herself from her indecent thoughts as the coach bounced away from the estate.
She pulled off her riding gloves and tossed them onto the seat next to her. Now that she had time to look at the coach’s interior, she realized how fine it was. Deep, forest-green velvet squabs and shining brass fixtures. More credit, no doubt.
She dared a glance at Devon. If they were to ride together in such close quarters the entire way to Gretna, she must find a way to make things less awkward between them. “I cannot sleep. I’m so worried for Annie.” She tugged at the strings of her bonnet under her chin, untying them. “What can she have been thinking? It’s ludicrous. Madness.” Oh, God. It was the same madness she’d had years ago when she’d wanted to run off to Gretna with Devon, only Devon never came.
Devon relaxed back against the seat. He pushed his long legs out and crossed them at the ankles. Was he remembering the two of them five years ago also? Lily quickly turned her face to look out the window.
“When’s the last time you saw her?” Devon asked.
Lily pulled the bonnet from her head. “Last night, I suppose. Before I … that is … before we…” Oh, surely she would burst into flames from embarrassment.
Devon cleared his throat. “At the ball?” he offered helpfully.
She patted her mussed hair into place. “Yes.”
Devon pulled off his gloves. “Did she say anything? Give you any reason to suspect?”
“No. Nothing.” Lily put a finger to her lips. “Though I did tell her we’d be leaving for Northumberland today. Of course, now that plan is ruined.”
Devon’s brow furrowed. “Northumberland?”
“Yes. We’re planning to live with my cousin.”
“Why?” He searched her face.
Lily let her head fall back against the seat. She groaned. “Does it matter now? Annie’s gone.”
Devon’s jaw tightened. “Sounds as if she left to escape her fate.”
Lily sensed he’d been about to say something else, but changed his mind. He obviously hadn’t liked the thought of her going to Northumberland, but thankfully he dropped that subject, perhaps because he sensed she couldn’t stand that particular discussion at the moment. All she could worry about now was Annie.
She covered her eyes with her fingertips. “I knew she was upset with me last night, but I … I underestimated how much she wanted to stay in London. And all for that awful Eggleston lad.”
Devon cracked a smile. “Ah, he’s not so bad. Just young. And foolish.”
Like she and Devon were, years ago. Lily sighed. “That’s a charitable way to put it.”
“When was the last time anyone else saw her?”
Lily bit her lip. “With Mary’s memory the way it is, Annie might have been gone all night. Why?”
“We need to determine how big of a lead they have on us. If they’ve been gone since early this morning, they’ll probably be to Leicester by now.”
Lily closed her eyes. An awful vision flashed in her mind. One of Annie, standing in front of the blacksmith in Gretna Green, exchanging vows with Arthur Eggleston. Ruining her entire life. Lily squeezed her gloves tightly. “Do you think they will stop tonight?”
Devon shrugged. “It depends on how much money they have and what resources they can find along the way. They’re both young and inexperienced, however. My guess is they will stop tonight. If they do, we may be able to catch up to them.”
Lily’s shoulders shook. “But how will we know where they stopped?”
Devon leaned forward and took her icy hand in his warm one. Sparks flew up Lily’s arm. She couldn’t look him in the eye. Not yet. Not after the night they’d spent together. But he was comforting her. And she so appreciated it.
“Don’t worry,” Devon said. “There aren’t many inns between here and Gretna. I think I can guess where they might stop.”
“How do you know so much about the way to Gretna?” As soon as the words left her mouth, she regretted them.
Devon looked off into the distance, a reluctant, humorless smile on his face. “I looked into it, once upon a time.”
Lily bowed her head; the lump had returned to her throat. “Gretna is the destination of fools and the very young.”
Devon’s voice was quiet, a bit ironic. “Or those who are very much in love.”
She didn’t answer. Instead, she closed her eyes and swallowed. Then she glanced back out the window. “Oh, Devon. What if they don’t stop?”
He leaned forward and squeezed her hand. “Get some rest, Lily. It’s sure to be a long day.”
* * *
Devon was right. The journey north to Scotland was both difficult and uncomfortable. At the pace they’d set for themselves, they were forced to stop to change the horses more often than they liked. By nightfall, they hadn’t made nearly the progress they meant to.
Lily woke from a short nap and found herself thoroughly entertained by Devon. He kept her laughing with jests and stories from his various exploits. She enjoyed herself, and she knew, without a doubt, he was doing his best to make her feel better and keep her mind off her worry for Annie.
“I
think they may be at the Gray Horse Inn,” Devon explained after climbing back into the carriage from the last stop. “From what I understand, that is a popular destination.” Lily looked through the window of the coach through bleary, sleep-deprived eyes. Stars blinked in the night sky. She stretched.
“How far is that?” Lily croaked.
“A few hours yet. We must travel through the night.”
Lily nodded. “Yes. Yes, of course.” She made a move to sit up, but Devon shifted across the seat to sit next to her. He gently pulled her head into his lap and stroked her hair. “Shh. Rest.”
It was an impropriety, but Lily couldn’t help herself. She was tired. Exhausted, actually. It felt so good to rest her head in Devon’s warm lap. Besides, after the wine bottle incident, “impropriety” had taken on a new meaning. His fingertips on her temple lulled her to sleep and soon she was dozing. A sweet, blissful slumber.
* * *
When Lily woke, much refreshed, it was still dark and the coach was still bumping along. Her head remained in Devon’s lap. Suddenly shy, she struggled into an upright position.
“What time is it?” she whispered, wrapping her arms around her middle and curling herself into a ball in the corner. She shivered. Devon had drawn a cozy blanket over her and she pulled it all the way to her chin.
Devon retrieved his silver timepiece from his waistcoat. The one small candle burning in the lantern inside the coach illuminated it for him. “Nearly three o’clock.”
Lily yawned. “Are we almost there?”
“It shouldn’t be more than half an hour.”
Lily let her shoulders relax. She desperately hoped Devon was right and that Annie and Eggleston had stopped at the inn for the night. What would she do if they hadn’t? She shivered again. She couldn’t think about that now.
“Annie doesn’t understand.” Lily sighed. “She thinks I’m trying to ruin her life, but I’m trying to save her from ruin. Why are the young so foolish?”
Devon made a steeple with his fingers. “Ah, now that is a question for the ages, is it not? Some would argue they do not know any better. They are ruled by their emotions. Fools rush in, as Pope said.”
“If only she would listen to me,” Lily moaned. “I would never do anything to hurt her. She must know that.”
“You do not want her to marry. And she wants to, correct?”
“Yes, but if she doesn’t marry, she’ll never have to listen to a man. Be at his whims and mercy. She doesn’t understand how awful it is.”
“You were only married for a month. Was it so awful then?”
Lily hung her head. “Before that, I had to answer to my father. And all he ever cared about was money. Annie has the opportunity to escape all of that. She’s at no one’s mercy.”
Devon’s voice was soft. “No one’s but yours. And pardon me for pointing it out, but you seem to be greatly interested in the subject of money yourself.”
Lily snapped her mouth shut. Obviously, it was time to change the subject. Devon didn’t understand either. Money was nothing to him. But Lily understood the importance of money. Money meant the one thing she’d always longed for. Security.
She pulled the blanket to her nose. “While it’s unfortunate you do not agree with my decisions, it’s neither here nor there to me. As soon as we find Annie, she and I will go straight to Northumberland. Our cousin has agreed to have us. We must be close. I’ll send for our things.”
Devon’s eyes narrowed on her. “You’re really going to Northumberland?”
Lily’s heart fluttered. Was that regret she heard in his voice? Did he want her to stay?
“Yes,” she answered, holding her breath. “I have no choice. The earl has asked us to leave the town house and we have nowhere else to go.”
Devon shrugged and looked out the window. “Why don’t you find a man? Get married? Stay in London?”
Pain squeezed Lily’s heart. She turned to look out at the darkness. “It’s not as if I haven’t had offers. Just before I discovered Annie was missing, Medford asked me to marry him.” She lifted her chin and glanced back at Devon.
Devon’s face went completely blank. A tic appeared in his jaw. “Did he?”
She nodded.
He clenched his fist. “When are the happy nuptials to be?”
Lily let the blanket drop to her lap. “What makes you think I said yes?”
“You’d be a fool not to. Medford is wealthy, titled. Not to mention his disgustingly impeccable reputation.”
“You’d be a fool not to.” That hurt. More than she expected. But she’d be skinned alive before she’d let Devon know it. She crossed her arms over her chest. “When you put it that way, I suppose it was quite an offer.”
Devon glanced out the window at the darkness this time. The muscle continued to tic in his jaw. “Are you telling me you said no?”
Lily traced the pattern of the velvet squabs with her fingertip. Her voice was quiet. “I didn’t have a chance to answer. We were interrupted by the news that Annie had gone missing.”
Devon pressed his lips together until they went white, but said no more on the subject. “There’s no time for you to go to Northumberland now. It should only take us a day or two to return to London if we find them tonight. I must get there myself by Saturday evening.”
Lily raised a brow. “Another young widow to seduce?” She winced. That sounded harsh, but she couldn’t help it after he’d practically told her she’d be an idiot if she didn’t marry Medford.
Devon ran a hand through his hair, making it look more tousled and irresistible. Lily glanced away. He didn’t answer, but it didn’t matter. She was thankful for his help with her sister, but she still had her plan to carry out. She would not be accepting Medford’s suit. She would soon be a governess in Northumberland.
“Why do you need to get back to London by Saturday night?”
He scrubbed his hands across his face. “Does it matter?”
“Tell me.”
Pushing out his cheek with his tongue, he regarded her down the length of his nose. “Very well, Lily. Since you’re full of questions tonight, I have my own question for you.” He leaned forward, bracing his elbows on both knees. He stared her straight in the eye. “How the hell were you a virgin until last night?”
CHAPTER 27
Lily clutched at the window ledge for support.
He knew.
Of course he knew. He wasn’t a fool. She’d expected him to realize and to wonder. She hadn’t expected him to come out and ask her.
She needed time to invent an answer. She cleared her throat. “Wh … what do you mean?”
He gave her a skeptical look. “Don’t make me repeat the question. You know exactly what I mean.”
Lily turned to rest her forehead on the cool glass of the coach’s window. She squeezed her eyes shut. “My husband was very old and very…” Her voice trailed off. She could feel Devon’s eyes on her.
“How were you able to write Secrets of a Wedding Night when you were untouched?”
It was obvious that one could not die of embarrassment, for if that were possible Lily was quite sure she’d be gone by now. It was useless to continue to pretend she did not write the pamphlet. Devon knew. He’d known all along.
She kept her eyes squeezed shut. “I … I was so frightened on my wedding night, s-shaking. Merrill, tried, well … that is … we tried.” She winced. “Oh, suffice it to say that nothing happened. He couldn’t … and it was my fault. He said so. He said he’d never had such a problem before.” Guilt and shame washed over her. “No doubt he would have tried again, but he died so soon after we wed … it just … never happened.” She opened her eyes again to see Devon searching her face intently. Oh, God, were her cheeks scarlet or burgundy? “So you see, I have quite the experience in repulsing men, first you and then Merrill…”
Devon leaned forward and grabbed her hand, squeezing it. “Listen to me, Lily. It wasn’t you. Merrill was an old man. It’s very com
mon for elderly men to be unable to perform. It had nothing to do with you.”
She opened her eyes and dared a glance at him. “Truly?”
“Yes. Quite common from what I understand.”
“But he told me it was my fault.”
“Also quite common, I’m afraid. No doubt his pride precluded him from admitting to his own physical shortcomings.”
Lily expelled her breath. “It’s something of a relief actually, to know that.” She gave him a half-smile. “Thank you.”
Devon squeezed her hand one more time before leaning back. “But how did you get your information for the pamphlet if nothing happened on your wedding night?”
She shrugged. “I’m a writer. I made it up.”
Devon’s eyes flashed wide. “Made it up?”
Another shrug. “I used my imagination. And bits and pieces of conversations I’ve heard through the years. Ever since I was widowed, everyone just assumed I knew anyway, so I’ve heard a great deal on the subject. I simply did nothing to set them straight. What would be the point?”
Silence rested between them.
When he finally spoke, Devon’s voice was oddly calm. “Why me? Why last night?”
“Why not?” But her third shrug held more pain than he would ever know.
“I thought the pamphlet described a physical act. I thought it was detailed.”
“Have you read it?”
He shook his head. “No. I merely heard it was so awful that young women were crying off over it. I knew that much was true because of Miss Templeton’s reaction.”
Lily sniffed and smiled barely. “Well, it doesn’t take much of an imagination to scare some young women apparently. And I did describe the truth. I merely skipped the details. I explained how frightened I was and how I wanted to die. I explained how awful the entire episode was.”
Devon cracked a smile. “Are you honestly telling me you’ve scared half of the young women in the ton with a pamphlet that describes nothing more than nerves and innuendo?”
Lily pushed up her chin. “I couldn’t very well come out and tell everyone my marriage wasn’t consummated, could I? Even if they didn’t know I wrote that pamphlet. And if I’d described the act in detail, the pamphlet would be absolutely indecent. And I am not that kind of lady.”
Secrets of a Wedding Night Page 20
