"I know, but I don't want anyone hounding you, and I don't want them finding out what we've been doing here. I couldn't stand it if anyone thought less of you because of me and my mistakes."
Madison understood. If anyone got wind of this fake marriage, their reputations, hers especially, would be shot to pieces.
Alex sighed, jamming his hand into his hair and raking it back. Damn Elizabeth. If he didn't know better he'd believe she had a spy watching him. And he didn't want to tell anyone about Madison. Not because he wanted to keep this relationship secret, but because he was afraid the world he lived in would crush it with its ugliness. He didn't want to think about Savannah and what would happen when they returned. He ignored his uncertainty, ignored the goading voice inside him that asked if he was ready to go the distance and risk failing again – the voice that sounded too much like Celeste's.
* * *
Chapter 10
«^»
The beach was deserted, the evening air cool.
Alex sat behind her, his chest bracing her back as she sat between his legs on a flat rock, watching the sun go down. They shared a very expensive bottle of wine, drinking from the neck like Vikings. "This is so bohemian." She handed him the bottle.
He nuzzled her ear, whispering, "Your words are slurring," before tipping the bottle to his lips.
"I know." She tilted a look at him. "Quick. Take advantage of me."
He winked. "I will."
Madison didn't think she could be happier. They spent their days with the O'Malleys, pretending to be husband and wife and the night alone, exploring each other, ending a night of lovemaking with milk and cookies.
She tipped her head to look at him, the wind off the lake tearing loose her hair and she brushed it back. "You look pensive."
He smiled down at her. "That's because my butt hurts sitting on these rocks."
She stood, pulling him to his feet and on the deserted stretch of shore, she slipped her hands inside his back jean pockets. She rubbed.
He moaned a little. "Now something else hurts."
"I can fix that, too."
"You're gonna kill me." She was insatiable and he loved it.
"Guess I need a new man, then." She stepped out of his arms and headed up the nearest slope.
He grabbed her, yanking her back and together they tumbled to the sand. "Am I that, Maddy? Your man?" His breath snagged in his chest as he waited.
"Yeah." With both hands, she fingered back his hair. "For as long as you want to be." She couldn't ask for more.
"As long as I can." Alex kissed her, pulling her around him, molding her body as if to bring her into himself. "Why is it always right now that I have to have you? Let's find some privacy." Climbing to their feet, they scrambled up the incline, racing across the avenue and into the inn. Minutes later, Alex's hand shook as he shoved in the key. She was already unbuttoning his shirt. The door opened and they fell inside, fell back against the door, tearing at each other's clothes, toeing off shoes and socks.
The shirts went, then her bra. And he cupped her breasts, sinking to take her nipple into his mouth. He ravished and tugged, and she clutched him closer, harder. He lowered to his knees, taking her panties down with her shorts.
He cupped her buttocks and pulled her under the warmth of his mouth. She shrieked and he chuckled, the sound vibrating through her being like a rumble of sweet thunder. He peeled her wider and laved the bud of her sex until she was begging for him to stop. He straightened but she was on him, pushing him to the floor. She jerked on his belt, opened his jeans and freed him.
"Now, Alex." She rocked against his thickness.
"Slow down." His hands roamed wildly over her skin.
"I can't."
"But we need a— Tell me there's a condom in this thing." He dumped her purse on the floor, scattering the contents. He found one.
It was on and he was inside her in one plunging stroke. "Oh, that's heaven, heaven." He withdrew and shoved. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be. More." She locked her legs around him and met his thrusts, begged for his strength. She whispered in his ear how much she loved this wild impatient side of him. For it matched hers.
"You make me crazy," he said into her mouth as he pushed and pushed, moving her across the floor. "Oh, Maddy."
"Alex!"
"Yeah, honey, I feel it. Show me, show me." He cradled her head in his palms and withdrew and thrust, watching her passion explode over her features, feel it ripple though her lithe body and into his. It was exquisite, heart wrenching and he pushed once more and joined her, bodies straining, grinding to keep the last vestiges of desire within. They trembled, kisses calming to tenderness and together they started breathing hard and laughing.
"Remind me never to drink wine with you."
"Felt different this time, huh?" he said. As if there was nothing between them.
"Yeah." She stroked damp locks from his forehead. "But then it feels incredible every time, you ravish me."
* * *
All morning before the ceremony for Angus and Laura, Madison felt suddenly, coldly, locked out, minutes after a phone call woke him just after dawn. He'd been working nonstop since, talking on the phone to Kyle, Steven Reynolds, even Anna Marsh. That he didn't confide in her wasn't a concern. She knew little of his business and didn't care to know, but that he tipped the computer screen away when she was near, or talked softly enough for her to get the message that the call was confidential, didn't escape her. Stinging a little, she gave him privacy and had waited patiently on the deck till it was time to leave for Angus's home. She didn't want to think about Elizabeth's call, but it plagued her like a disease. Yet even now, Madison recognized the tension in his shoulders, his punishingly straight spine in the upholstered seat of the rented Jaguar. His fingers flexed on the steering wheel as they drove to the O'Malleys' lake house. She knew how much Little People meant to him, and she wished she could help him, do anything to erase the serious look on his handsome face. Yet she wondered if his concern had to do with Elizabeth or his deal with Angus.
He pulled into the drive and turned off the motor, staring for a long moment over the sloping hood. "I'm sorry."
"For what?"
He turned his head and met her gaze. "Ignoring you."
"You aren't my happiness guru, Alex."
His lips quirked.
"I've been living alone for a while. And I like my own company."
"So do I."
Together they leaned, and the instant her hands touched his shoulders, grinding away the tightness, Alex moaned.
"Let me make it better, Yankee," she whispered, before her mouth covered his.
Alex responded like a crazed animal, sudden and fiery, cradling her face in his palms and tasting her. Oh, no, I can't lose this, he thought as fresh desire rocketed through him.
"Feeling better?"
"Uh-uh, need some more therapy." He worried her lips, his tongue outlining their lush shape before pushing deeply inside. She purred for him, twisting in the seat to get closer to him, her hands pulling at his shoulders and pulling him down.
"Do these seats go back?"
Alex nearly howled at the image she created. "I don't think Angus would take too kindly to his guests making love in his driveway."
"We could leave, go down to the lake. No one knows we're here yet."
"You tempt me, woman," he said, whispering kisses over her throat, then lower.
"That's the idea." She'd rather be naked with him than watching Angus and Laura renew their vows. It was just lousy timing, but she didn't need the emotions of a wedding giving Alex the wrong idea about her. What she'd said earlier was the truth. He wasn't responsible for her happiness. But right now she was damn happy to be kissing him and held him completely responsible for the pleasure.
Childish giggles came to them, and Alex looked up, scanning the area.
"We're surrounded."
"Do we take cover or fight them off?"
He met her ga
ze. "Take no prisoners."
She rolled her eyes. "Typical man. I say we go for negotiations." She sat up, giving a mock scowl to the kids before she opened the car door.
"We don't have anything to bargain with, do we?" She reached behind the seat and pulled out a bag, grinning like Santa on Christmas, before leaving the car. Children surrounded her, and she doled out prizes they'd won from the festival, saving the last stuffed rabbit for Shannon.
"Young'uns, gotta love 'em," she said as they scattered like mice.
Alex felt a pinch of guilt as he lifted the brightly wrapped gifts and came around to the side of the car. He recognized the longing in her dark eyes as she watched the children, knew she wanted some of her own. Babies, the mere thought of them, terrified him and though she didn't look the least bit maternal in the curve-hugging raspberry suit, he couldn't help thinking what a wonderful mother she'd make. And that she would be having children with another man. His heart clenched just then, and he turned his attention to the sprawling estate, wanting to get lost somewhere with her, yet knowing his future lay in Angus O'Malley's hands. He had to be here. Sliding his arm around her waist, he walked with her toward the house, dread moving over his spine.
The moment they stepped through the front door of the O'Malleys' lake house, Colleen, Bridgett and Megan ushered Madison off to the upper floor. She looked back over she shoulder at him, shrugging, then going along.
"What's this all about?"
Randy smiled as the women helped his wife up the stairs. "Hell if I know. Weddings are for women, right? Even renewals. But then, you know that already. Men are supposed to arrive clean shaven for the sacrifice." Randy gave his shoulder a commiserating shake. "Don't tell my wife I said that, 'cause marrying her was the best thing that ever happened to me. And she knows it."
Alex gave him a side glance and wished he understood, then knew he was beginning to, slowly.
"Come on, Angus wants to talk to you."
* * *
A tightness formed in Madison's throat at the sight of Laura in her wedding gown. The forty-year-old creation was lacy and demure, and as Madison stood with the other guests as Angus and Laura promised another forty years with each other, she felt a tinge of envy. Her parents would have celebrated their thirtieth this month. To last forty years, she thought, when people married and divorced with such ease, was a remarkable occasion.
She could imagine Angus and Laura years before, a strapping Irishman and his bonny bride. Angus had said he'd owned no more than a box of tools and the clothes on his back. It was how her father had come to her mother. Penniless, with only his love. Her eyes burned suddenly, and she wished she and Alex had met under different circumstances. But the reality was it wouldn't have mattered. She would still love him. She heard the precious vows and realized she would never have this with the man she loved.
She was in love alone.
After the ceremony she thanked Laura for including her and Alex in their happiness and moved off. A pair of nannies had been hired to care for the children while the mothers prepared, and Madison left Shannon in loving arms before searching out Alex. She found him leaning against a tree, his dark suit clashing against the white flowers and blue ribbons woven around the trunk.
"What's wrong?"
Alex looked at her, his brows knit tightly. "Angus offered for us to renew our vows with them."
She inhaled, her eyes flying wide. "What did you say?"
"I told him we didn't want to take away from this special day for them."
She let out a deep sigh. "Good. Because I will only carry this lie so far. Marriage is sacred. I don't like being a phony, especially today."
Tension skipped up his spine. "He was pretty hopeful."
"Then tell him the truth."
"I can't. Not for me, but … God, Madison." He looked away. "I wish I'd never started this."
Her expression softened, and she stepped closer. "It's okay. Without a license it wouldn't be legal, anyway."
"Yeah, I guess so," he said, looking at the lake and wondering why his chest suddenly burned.
"We'd have a devil of a time keeping it secret, regardless."
He turned his head.
"The last thing I want is to let the media trap us into something we don't want."
He didn't speak, bracing his shoulder on the tree and meeting her gaze.
"You and I might be having fun now, Alex, but this isn't real."
He scowled. "It was real as hell last night when I was inside you, and you were screaming for more."
She smiled and tilted her head. "Oh, darling, that's not what I'm saying." She slipped closer, brushing a lock of hair off his brow, and Alex closed his eyes briefly, loving the constant gesture. "We're in an artificial world here, far away from friends and the public eye. I know you don't want this to get out of hand when we return, and neither do I."
"Are you saying when we get home, it's over?" God no, he thought.
"Uh-uh, Yankee, you aren't getting away that easily." His shoulders sagged with relief, and Madison felt her heart skip with hope. "I'd like us to go on forever, but you made your future plans clear."
His gaze narrowed. "I feel a very ugly but coming."
"I've got you here, all to myself, without too many distractions, but in Savannah, with your company, your social calendar, the press—" she made a face on that one "—it's different. And you know it. I'm afraid you won't have room for anything else."
"That's not all of it. You don't think I can commit to a relationship."
"How can you? You're so committed to your work, look where its led you … and me."
"What if I say I've been thinking differently—"
"Shh, no, darling, don't think so much." She pressed against him, and his arm slid smoothly around her waist. "I adore you, Alexander, truly I do. But don't try to convince yourself that you have to want what I do to be happy." She cupped his jaw, gazing deeply into his eyes. "I am happy, just the way we are." She brushed her mouth across his, and Alex had barely the chance to trace her lips with his own before she walked away.
A month ago, that's exactly what he wanted to hear. Was relieved to hear. But now he felt ostracized from her, warned. They might be good together beyond the bedroom, but she didn't believe in him. Not where it counted. Not in matters of the heart. Alex knew he'd no one to blame, except himself. He'd put up so many roadblocks, she didn't believe there was any way in. And now, she had some of her own.
Alex looked at her and saw the soft sheen of tears as her gaze followed Angus and Laura.
"Madison?"
"I want to go home. I can't do this anymore."
* * *
In the hotel room he moved to the desk, racking papers, organizing notes, yet he could feel her without looking, smell her scent as she passed him and went to her bags. He packed up his laptop, smirking to himself when he found a foil packet underneath. They must have used dozens of these, he thought, shoving it into his pocket. Finally he looked at her. His insides ground as she unpinned her hair, fluffing out the long, brown curls, and he wished he could say something, but the words wouldn't come. The inability shamed him, leaving him feeling raw and aching and lonely.
She selected a traveling outfit and started undressing, kicking off her heels.
Alex felt time slipping away. He closed the briefcase and went to her.
She stilled, meeting his gaze, her suit jacket open and exposing her breasts cupped in raspberry lace.
They stared.
"What?"
"I wish I could make the world go away."
She laid her hand to his chest. "It will be all right, Alex. You'll get the company and be richer than ever." She tried to smile and failed.
"That's not what I meant."
He ducked, his mouth swooping down on hers, his arms locking around her. She responded instantly, pushing her fingers into his hair and arching to the bend of his body. He lifted her, and she wrapped her legs around his hips, kissing him harder, hungr
ier, her hand wedged between them and opening his trousers.
Her hand dove inside, fingers closing, stroking, and he dropped to the edge of the bed, stripping off her jacket, unfastening her bra. His mouth was on her in an instant, swallowing her nipple, sucking it deeply as his hand worked under her skirt, feeling past the stockings and garters to the thong he knew she wore. He pulled the panties aside, probing.
Her breath scattered over his face, her silken muscles flexing, and he knew she was as close to the edge as he was.
"Alex. Hurry." She shoved his clothing down and climbed higher.
Alex dug in his pocket for the foil. She took it, tore the packet open with her teeth, then rolled it down.
"Madison, honey—" he groaned as she guided him inside her.
She slammed into him, pushing him down on the bed and riding him. Raw, primitive. Alex rolled her to her back and shoved, and she smiled, meeting his thrusts, clutching him harder.
"I adore what you do to me, my love," she whispered.
My love. "Oh, Madison, you humble me." He rained kisses over her face, pushing and pushing, trying to grab more of her, keep her closer, longer. Here they trusted and here he wanted to stay. But sensations crested, broke free too soon. And they bowed against each other, fused, fingers digging into skin, bodies clenching and flexing as rapture flooded through them, melting two into one. They lay suspended for seconds, then sank together to the bed, still joined, still kissing with all the heat of moments before.
Holding his gaze, she smoothed his hair back, her breathing rushed.
His gaze searched hers, seeking he didn't know what. Only that he was desperate to keep her and didn't know how to do it.
"I'm not going anywhere, Alexander."
He let out a long breath, then buried his face in the curve of her shoulder. She could read his mind, he swore. "Madison – I—" He stalled, swallowing. "I need you."
She closed her eyes tightly, sending a tear rolling sideways to her temple. She knew it was hard for him to admit even that and she wished she had the nerve to tell him how madly she loved him. She opened her eyes, her gaze catching the flicker of light off her diamond ring as she stroked his hair. "I need you, too."
GOING … GOING … WED! Page 12
