ReZERO_Starting Life in Another World Vol. 5
Page 14
Subaru stood rooted in place as the human wave parted around him. The beating of his cracked heart grew fiercer.
“Hey! Hey there! You listening?!”
Along with a click of the tongue, the rough voice reached him from right beside him. Subaru slowly shifted his gaze toward it and saw a stern, scowling face with a vertical scar on it.
The man rubbed the white streak with a finger.
“Gimme a break, kid. Don’t just stare into space like that.”
“Eh, ah?”
The very faint reply drew a sigh out of the man.
“What’s with that weak reply? Well, whatever. More importantly, something happen to you?”
The speaker held out his hand with a nice, shiny red fruit sitting on top of it. Subaru came to the conclusion that the man’s appearance was a truly terrible match for the person inside. It seemed surreal.
Subaru remained silent as he gazed absentmindedly at the fruit. His situational awareness was badly lacking.
However, the man didn’t suspect that something was wrong with Subaru, instead leaning forward as he said, “Hey, enough fooling around here. I asked, how many abbles? Don’t make me say it over and over.”
The man reached over the counter and grabbed hold of Subaru’s shoulder. He roughly pulled him closer, and Subaru’s defenseless body pitched forward and crashed against the shelf. The man let go with a surprised look on his face.
“Wh-what are you doing?! Stand up properly. Your legs are all wobbly, damn it…”
“L-l-legs?”
The man pointed to Subaru’s lower body with an exasperated look on his face.
“You’ve got two good ones attached to your hips. What, daydreamed you’d lost them or something?”
When Subaru looked down, he did have legs, trembling and shaking though they were. Since they were unreliable and unable to support his body, he was leaning on the shelves at the moment.
With an annoyed voice, the man said, “I’m begging you, quit the bad jokes. This ain’t normal conversation, and it’s messin’ with me.”
But Subaru’s body did not respond.
Reality didn’t register as real. He felt detached somehow, like some sort of discord had developed in the connection between his body and his soul.
What was he doing there?
What had happened to him?
He felt like something had happened to him, but what?
—What am I doing here? What, what, what…?
Suddenly, a girl’s voice sounded in his ears.
“—Subaru?”
“—”
Unable to speak a word, Subaru felt his eyes go wide as he lifted up his face.
Behind the counter, there was a tiny silhouette standing near the stern, tall man, cleaning things up. She wore an apron dress that was mostly black, with a white apron and white headdress. She stood straight with a small stature and an elegant body. With the counter between them, she turned her lovely face toward Subaru. Her shoulder-length blue hair fluttered in the wind, drawing attention to her refreshing, gentle image.
Tears formed in his eyes.
“Ahh?”
“Subaru?”
Sobs poured out of him as his field of vision blurred. He earnestly rubbed both eyes, fearful that the clear, distinct image of the girl would fade.
And yet, she grew more and more distant as the murmurs loudened.
Before he realized it, he’d lost the support of the counter and fallen onto the street. Unable to send strength and will to his feet, he lay there amid the pedestrians coming and going, tears flowing as he gasped with disjointed breaths.
No, it was not breathing…
“Hu-hee… Hi-hi, ha-ha… He-hi, hi-ha-ha-ha…!”
—It was laughter.
The murmurs broadened. He could tell that more and more people were shifting their gazes to him.
Someone was watching him. Someone saw him. He wasn’t by himself. He wasn’t isolated. From this alone, he knew he was accepted, even lying there in the street like a marionette with cut strings.
Rather than run around the counter, the girl leaped right over it to move to his side.
“Subaru, what’s wrong?! Are you all right? Get a grip on…”
The girl wrapped her arms around the fallen Subaru to sit him up. As she did…
“Eh?”
She felt so defenseless, and he hugged her back with all his strength.
The girl accepted the embrace with astonishment. Her breath was so close, and her warmth was so comforting as he buried his nose into her shoulder and hugged her tight.
Perplexed, she tried to say something.
“Er… Um, Subaru? Umm…”
Each word, each syllable, each character, each breath, was a hymn to Subaru.
He embraced her firmly, his arms refusing to let go. Nor did the girl stir even an inch, quietly accepting the embrace, making no move to brush him off.
The warmth of her body, the heartbeats of life, made him feel that others were alive like nothing else could.
“Hi-ha… Uhi-ha, hi-hi-hi-hi.”
—The madman named Subaru Natsuki continued to simply laugh.
2
Ferris, sitting in a leather-covered chair, put a finger to his cheek and solemnly declared, “To be frank, Ferri can only say that it is all over now, meow…”
His ears twitched, and he swept back his flaxen hair as he shifted his gaze away from Subaru, sleeping in a feminine-looking bed. He looked instead to Rem with a pitying look in his eyes. He continued, “Ferri can only do something about physical wounds, you see. Issues with the body are workable, whether within or without…but there is nothing Ferri can do for the mind, meow.”
After Ferris’s apology for his powerlessness, Rem bowed in a show of respect.
“…No, thank you very much for exhausting all your efforts.”
But somehow, her flat voice sounded devoid of emotion. This was not like her normal suppression of her opinions. Rem’s inner turmoil was simply too great and had turned into profound sadness.
Ferris closed one eye in a pained look. Rem did not notice his reaction and gently leaned her head forward, shifting her attention to Subaru where he lay on the bed.
They had Subaru in bed to tend to him, but that didn’t mean he was asleep. Both his eyes were wide open as he stared straight at the ceiling. From time to time, he’d make a fragmented laugh, like he’d just remembered something, and when that passed, he would suddenly break into tears.
In his unstable state, Subaru’s torment continued apace.
—Truly, the change in the boy had been a sudden one.
Until that morning—no, the entire time he’d been walking with Rem through the royal capital that morning—he had been his normal self. Certainly the incident the day before weighed on him, and his behavior showed some signs that he was stressed, but Subaru was striving as he normally did. Rem deeply respected his wishes and sought to be close to him without changing his behavior.
She didn’t think anything had happened that could trigger this.
Rem painfully regretted that the instant Subaru had abruptly changed was when she’d taken her eyes off him. Even so, she was right there at the shop, listening to the shopkeeper converse with him.
Thanks to Rem’s tireless efforts, the store had sold its merchandise nicely, and the shopkeeper, in quite high spirits, seemed inclined to give them a souvenir. He was asking how many abbles Subaru wanted to take with him, and she remembered him answering, “How ’bout all of ’em?”
The very next moment, his demeanor abruptly changed, and he fell limply onto the street. When Rem sat him up, he seemed so overcome by sadness and tears of joy that he kept laughing.
Deeming he wasn’t well, Rem carried Subaru back to the Crusch villa, accepting all the trouble it might cause. Suspecting it was some kind of magical interference, she politely insisted that Ferris examine Subaru.
However, it had all come to naught. Even Ferris, the most a
ccomplished healer in all of the royal capital, could not identify the cause of his sudden change. If Ferris could do nothing, it might well mean that gathering all the great magic users in the entire royal capital would still not be enough to heal him.
Subaru’s present condition was unrelated to magic. But his mind had suddenly become unbalanced.
Ferris asked, “Ferri doesn’t really want to ask, meow, but what will you do?”
“Without understanding the cause, dealing with it is difficult… I am sorry to have troubled you, Master Felix.”
“Mmm, don’t worry ameowt it. As a matter of fact, it’s better for Ferri’s treatment now that he’s not making a weird fuss, in a meownner of speaking.”
Subaru hated Ferris’s treatment and often voiced his complaints. On that level, Rem could understand how he was easier to deal with lying down and listless. The words were still highly insensitive.
Ferris continued, “But…but is it really good to continue treatment meow?”
Rem, who was watching Subaru, lifted up her head and shifted her gaze toward Ferris.
“…What do you mean?”
“Don’t be upset by my asking, meow, but the treatment for Subaru’s gate is to make life easier for him, yes?”
“Yes.”
“If he can no longer live a normal life, treating him is meaningless, isn’t it?”
“—Subaru is…!”
The even more insensitive remark drove Rem to forget Ferris’s status as she yelled. But even faced with the maid’s emotions, Ferris’s look of doubt did not falter.
“Are you saying don’t stop now, meow? Seeing him like this? Are you serious? It’s true some things happened to him, but if that’s enough to break him, he’s not likely to ever recover!”
Ferris looked down at Subaru with undiluted scorn. To Rem, who knew that this was the man to whom Lugunica had granted the title of “Blue,” the archetype for all water magic users, his behavior was all too callous.
If someone couldn’t be healed, throw the person away. That was the judgment of the kingdom’s foremost healer? What did he understand about the individual named Subaru to judge that he had no prospects for healing?
“Oh my, what a stare mew have… Subawu’s a lucky man. Not that he ever realized it.”
“Subaru’s current situation is unrelated to the royal selection. He is not a person who would lose his mind over minor failures.”
“Believe that all you want. As far as Ferri is concerned, keeping his sanity after everything that’s happened presents problems of its own, meow. And besiiides…”
Ferris set aside his flippant tone as he looked frostily at Rem.
“Don’t misunderstand. Ferri doesn’t hate Subawu, so this isn’t meowt of some kind of special grudge against him.”
“…”
“This isn’t particular to Subawu as a person. Ferri just hates people who lose their will to live, pure and simple.”
Ferris pointed at Subaru, and then he touched his finger to his own chin. “Even for someone with my meowgic specialty, there’s no way to use that power besides healing. Ferri helps all kinds of people day after day to be of service to Lady Crusch. Meow, everyone struggles hard to live, so thanks doesn’t matter, but Ferri hates wasting this power on anyone.”
“I think that is admirable.”
“Thank you— But it’s not right to save people who don’t want to live. Even if you heal the body, isn’t it just saving an unused life? If that’s the case, end it before it causes other people trouble. Well, in this case it already has, meow.”
Ferris delivered his blunt assessment with a stern face.
Behind that hard demeanor, Rem keenly felt Ferris’s sincerity concerning the many lives he had no doubt saved. His way of saying it was dismissive, but it was what Ferris had learned from watching life and death in all that time. That had informed his views on life itself.
“Even so, Subaru is…”
Rem, battered by Ferris’s words, looked at the boy with pure regret. Subaru was unaware that he was the subject of the conversation as he made faint, intermittent, warped giggles, as if hearing these things had stirred the wounds remaining in his mind.
Deep inside, Rem wanted nothing more than to lose her grip on herself, cling to Subaru, and cry aloud. But that would bring dishonor to him and tarnish the good name of Roswaal, her benefactor. More than anything else, it would be a betrayal of the feelings she herself had carried while watching over him all this time.
A clear voice flowed into the room, abruptly breaking the awkward silence within.
“—Ferris, I believe your view is just a little too strict.”
Rem reflexively raised her head at the voice. When Ferris noticed the visitor, his expression brightened. After all, his eyes were always full of zealous devotion when they gazed upon her.
“Lady Crusch,” said Rem.
“I do not go as far as to say weakness is a crime. I do believe, however, that condoning that weakness and wallowing in it while leaving the situation uncorrected is very much a vice.”
When Rem hastily lowered her head at Crusch’s arrival, the duchess checked her with a hand.
With a shake of her long green hair, she moved to the edge of the bed. Her eyes narrowed as she looked down at Subaru, who had a wicked smile on his face even then.
“I see. This certainly is an alarming state. Do you know the cause?”
Hearing Crusch’s question, Ferris raised both his hands up as he replied, “No. According to Rem, he suddenly fell over, so Ferri examined him from head to toe. But there’s no sign of any interference with his mana, meow.”
“Is it possible this is some kind of curse? It is difficult to imagine, but I can think of someone taking measures against those with knowledge of the royal candidates. Or one could suspect that this is a show of force by another camp. However…”
“Neither is very likely, is it, meow? There’s not much time to set something up, and who’d go after Subawu in the first place? Anyone involved would know he’s powerless, and there is no meowgical interference anyway, curses included. Ferri’s positive. And besides…”
As Ferris’s words trailed off, he tilted his head and gently leaned into Crusch, who stood there with her arms folded.
“Lady Crusch, do you doubt Ferri’s abilities?”
“Of course not. I could never question your ability, personality, or loyalty. Even if you were to hold a dagger in front of me, ready to run me through, that thought is set in stone.”
“Oh my, Lady Crusch, what a meowgnificent line… Ahh, Ferri’s falling to pieces.”
Crusch left Ferris to squirm and wallow as she shifted her penetrating gaze toward Rem.
“Ferris has spoken. And if Ferris’s power will not suffice, none in my house is capable of treating Subaru Natsuki. I’m sorry we can be of no assistance.”
Crusch’s apology, despite doing nothing wrong herself, sent Rem into another low bow.
“—Not at all. Your deep consideration leaves me speechless.”
In truth, beyond the reach of words and pleasantries, Crusch had conveyed warmth to her that she could never return. The finest healer in all the kingdom had rendered his diagnosis, and the head of a rival political camp had conveyed sympathy nonetheless. What more could Rem hope for from them?
Crusch and Ferris had done nothing wrong. Rem knew that.
—After all, she had her own suspicions about how Subaru had ended up in that state.
“—The Witch.”
The presence, the “miasma” of the Witch enveloping Subaru’s entire body had become denser still. What linked that miasma to Subaru’s abnormal state was unclear, but it was a fact that she’d sensed an outpouring of it just before he had collapsed.
If the cause was the Witch’s poison, she could not criticize Ferris’s judgment that there was nothing he could do. Very few beings were able to sense the presence of that substance in the first place. Not even Ram could catch the scent the way
Rem could.
Nothing good came with such pall. Those who planned wicked things were rich with it. Her physiological distaste for it, and the hateful memories that accompanied it, made her deeply prejudiced against those who bore it.
Although the actions of the boy with the strongest Witch smell she’d ever met had melted her hard heart and swept those prejudices aside…
Even so. Yes, even so.
Rem knew that nothing good came from that miasma.
—The demon in her knew this.
3
Rem bowed and conveyed her deepest gratitude.
“—You have gone through great trouble for us. On behalf of my master, I thank you for your benevolence until this day.”
Crusch and Ferris stood before her. Rem and the others were meeting in the Crusch villa’s reception hall—in other words, Rem was bidding them farewell.
“I am sorry we could be of no help. By rights, it is presumptuous to receive compensation for such a thing…”
Seeing Crusch’s eyes fall slightly, Rem lifted her face and firmly replied, “Not at all. Ending our request before it was finished is due to our own circumstances. You have given us your utmost consideration until now, Lady Crusch. It is only right that we pay compensation as promised.”
Receiving her reply, Crusch made one final apology: “I am sorry.” She would say nothing more.
With his master’s lips closed, Ferris followed up.
“To be honest, it does leave things half-done, but it can’t be helped, meow? Rem, be in good health. As for Subawu…get well soon, is what Ferri should probably say?”
With one eye closed and one finger raised, Ferris indicated Subaru, standing behind Rem, leaning against the door in a slovenly state.
His condition had not improved. His reactions were as dull as before, with his consciousness stranded somewhere between dream and reality. In spite of that, he followed like a child when they led him around by the hand, and he could at least manage not to fall over. Though he still suddenly broke into little fits of laughter and tears from time to time.
Rem replied, “My words are insufficient to apologize for the rudeness caused by a member of our house. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for treating him with benevolence.”