Mermaid Inc.
A Romantic Comedy
Caroline Mickelson
Mermaid Inc.
© 2014 Caroline Mickelson
Published by Bon Accord Press
Cover and formatting by Sabrina Mickelson-Begic
All rights reserved
Dedicated with much love
to my daughter Celine
who has brought
much joy into my life ~
I love you!
Table of Contents
Title Page
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Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Epilogue
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Chapter One
The late morning sun sparkled over the coastal waters of southern California, its bright rays gave the water’s surface a glittery diamond cut appearance. Sea gulls soared in the clear blue sky, their calls to each other a melodic accompaniment to the gentle lapping of the surf against land. Appreciating a rare moment of inactivity, Miranda floated on her back, her reddish gold hair spread around her. The warm sun felt luxurious against her skin. She pulled her clam shells just a bit lower so that the sun could bronze her alabaster skin.
Occasionally her fin flicked just above the surface. If going to live on land was anything as relaxing as this, she was bound to enjoy her time there. After, of course, she accomplished her mission.
Miranda glanced back up at the sun. Judging by its position in the sky, she should get back down below the surface so she could attend her last debriefing before she traded her fin for a set of legs. Legs! The very idea sent a wave of excitement through her, right down to the tip of her tail. From the time she’d first seen humans dancing on the deck of a cruise ship, she’d wanted to know what it would be like to have two stilt-like appendages instead of a tail. Now she was going to find out. But first things first, she needed to get a pair.
She dove down under the surface and swam directly to her uncle’s sea cave. Instinct told her that she’d best bid farewell to her uncle before she went to get her legs. While Uncle Seamus, her dearest and only living relative, reluctantly supported her above-the-surface mission in principle, she loved him too much to force him to see her with legs. As tough as the old merman was, Miranda knew he’d shed major scales at the sight of her with toes.
“Uncle Seamus?” Miranda poked her head into the undersea grotto her uncle called home. “I’ve come to say goodbye.” When there was no answer she called out again, “I know you’re here. Mrs. Clamson next door told me you haven’t left your cave today.”
“That woman doesn’t know when to keep her shell shut.” With one powerful flick of his tail her Uncle Seamus swam down and enveloped Miranda in a hug. “I’ve been floating around trying to figure out what it is about the surface that fascinates you so much.”
Miranda didn’t bother to try to explain. Surely if her uncle was ever going to understand her interest in all things human, he would have done so the first seven hundred times she’d tried to explain it to him. “You don’t have to worry so much.”
His bushy white eyebrows rose. “Apparently I do, at least until you return.” He frowned. “Are you absolutely certain you want to do this?”
“Positively certain,” Miranda assured him. “Uncle Seamus, I’m completely committed to the task the Undersea Rescue Society has given me. And I believe deep down that you know this is an important opportunity to stick it to the sickos who are determined to slaughter innocent whales.” She cocked her head to the side. “So, do I have your blessing to go?”
“When you put it like that, I have to agree, don’t I?” The merman nodded. “You have my reluctant blessing.” He sighed and waved his hands in the direction of her tail. “You do understand that if you go through with this plan you’re going to need a set of legs.” His distasteful expression made it clear exactly what he thought of the idea of his niece with human limbs.
Miranda, however, had no such qualms. She was thrilled at the idea of having legs, ankles, and toes. She wanted to try on strappy sandals and curl her toes into the wet sand but she knew her uncle well enough to keep her excitement from showing. A far better course of action would be to prove to him that she understood the job at hand. “I’ll get in, do what I need to do, and I’ll be back underwater before you know it.”
His expression was grave. “First things first, my niece, I need to be certain you understand the duties, and consequences, of what you’re about to undertake.”
“The duties I have down pat,” Miranda assured him.
He shook his head ruefully. “You cannot convince me that you have any idea how to clean in the human world. You don’t even know what kind of messes they make.”
“Neither do you, Uncle.”
He snorted. “Nor do I want to know. But let us not argue about the two-legged race again. Instead tell me how you plan to make it look like you’ve been a maid before.”
Miranda shrugged. “I can read. There must be instructions somewhere? If not, no biggie. A little salt water would probably do wonders on human dirt.”
“Niece, what the human’s call dusting is actually the removal of dust, and not the distribution of it. You knew that, right?”
“Of course I did.”
Her uncle rolled his eyes at her obvious lie. “Moving on. Can you assure me that you’re completely aware of the consequences if you fail to return in time?”
Because her uncle looked all too serious, she tried for a bit of levity. “The biggest threat I perceive is that I’ll amass a shoe collection that I won’t want to leave behind.”
“Not funny, Miranda.” He slapped his forehead. “Holy seaweed, I knew this was a mistake.”
“I’m sorry. I’ll be serious, Uncle Seamus. Let’s start at the beginning. Here’s how it’s going to go – first I get my legs, then I scale the cliff, next I infiltrate Lockheed’s house, at which point I figure out what his public relations campaign is, and finally I report back to you and the Council so that we can thwart his plans. That’s it.”
Her uncle swam in rapid circles around the grotto. “You’re making it sound too simple. You remind me of your Aunt Coral.”
Miranda smiled. “I remember Aunt Coral as effervescent, fun loving, brave and very beautiful. So I thank you for the compliment.”
The merman came to an abrupt stop. “She was all those things and I loved her dearly, as I do you. But she was also reckless, naïve and ended up as sea foam. Which is exactly how you’re going to end up if you’re not back in fourteen days.”
Miranda suddenly felt a bit less flip. “Sea foam.”
He nodded gravely. “Sea foam.” He reached out for her hand and squeezed it. “What you’re willing to do is brave and will be of an inordinate help as we fight the monsters who slaughter whales. But you need to get back here before the two weeks are up. No delays and no exceptions. None. Understood?”
Miranda nodded. “All teasing aside, I do understand what’s at stake. I can do this, Uncle Seamus. I know I can.”
The merman held out his arms and hugged her tight. “I pray you’re right.” He swam with her to the edge of his cave and waved as she departed
. “I’ll see you in a few days, my dear.”
Miranda waved back, forcing herself to smile despite the sudden uncertainty that washed over her. A few days? From his lips to Poseidon’s ears.
***
“Please don’t make me do this, Miranda. There has to be some other way.”
Miranda eyed the pink tailed mermaid that had been one of her best friends since their first day in fin-school. “Chelsea, you can’t flip out on me now. We’ve taken this from a germ of an idea all the way through committee approval. Now isn’t the time to bail.”
“Ha, speak for yourself.” Chelsea did several quick somersaults in place, a long time habit Miranda knew meant her friend was nervous. “I could happily quit now.”
Miranda hadn’t expected this. Together she and Chelsea had hatched the idea that the Undersea Rescue Society transform a mer-person into a human and send them onto land. With passion and purpose they’d talked enough people into supporting their idea that they’d easily won committee approval when it’d come to a vote.
And now her friend thought Miranda would let her wiggle out of seeing this through? As if.
“Fine,” Miranda said. “You can quit just as soon as you set me up with a set of legs.”
Chelsea shook her head vehemently. “No, no, no and no. I refuse to discuss this any further. And that’s my final word on the subject.”
Miranda waited patiently. Words were Chelsea’s stock in trade and her final word was never quite final.
“And furthermore,” Chelsea added, “I think you’ve lost your mind.”
“Let’s not focus on what I’ve lost,” Miranda kept her voice low, soothing. Her friend was a classic type AA personality and tended to make a tsunami out of the littlest wave. But she was good hearted, loyal, smart and, most important of all, she was half human and knew more about legs than any other member of their undersea world. “Let’s focus on what we have to gain here,” Miranda reminded her. “Namely, my new legs.”
“I’m not talking about this anymore.”
Chelsea turned her back on Miranda. But by the way that the tips of her tail were quivering, Miranda knew the discussion wasn’t over. Five, four, three, two….
“I’ve never had to create a spell under such pressure before,” Chelsea protested as she spun back around. “What if I can’t do it? Please just drop this crazy idea, Miranda. We can pretend we never had this conversation.”
“Will we also pretend we didn’t petition the Undersea Rescue Society for approval? Come on Chelsea, we begged them to let me do this. And deep down I know you’re as committed to this as you’ve always been.” Miranda’s mind raced for any argument that would convince her friend. “Don’t forget about Summer and Goldie, I’ll be able to spend some time with them.”
“Oh, perfect, my hippy mother and her crazy pet bird.” Chelsea rolled her eyes. “That does little to encourage me to fit you with limbs. The two of them are several sea shells short of sane if you ask me. If it weren’t for the whales-”
Miranda snapped her fingers. “Exactly! The whales need us, Chelsea. They’re gentle and loving creatures. Who have they ever hurt?”
Neither mermaid had to bother to answer the question, the entire mer-world knew that whales were the gentle giants of the ocean.
“Okay, okay,” the pink mermaid conceded. “Let’s get to work on your legs.”
Miranda swam alongside her friend as they headed to Chelsea’s laboratory. It hardly seemed possible that her dream of experiencing the human world was about to come true. “If I could just make one tiny request, I’d like my legs to be long and shapely, and if you could paint my toenails a ballerina pink, I’d be forever grateful.”
“Don’t push it, Miranda. You’ll be lucky if I get the left and right limbs on the correct side.” Just before she dived down she called over her shoulder, “Let’s just hope the pain doesn’t kill you.”
It nearly did. Mere seconds after Miranda swallowed the white powder elixir, an excruciating pain started at the base of her tail and burned its way up to her midriff. She clung to Chelsea’s hand. It was as if each and every one of her scales was being ripped from her body. She bit her lip so hard she tasted blood. But just when she thought she couldn’t bear another moment of it, the pain swiftly and suddenly subsided.
Miranda took a deep, hopeful breath and glanced down at her feet. She had feet! She clapped her hands in delight. With a tiny fluttering motion she was able to make them move. “Chelsea, they’re perfect. Look!”
Her friend turned away. “I can’t bear to look. I so regret this already.”
Miranda laughed. “They’re gorgeous. They’re long and shapely and, best of all, they’re the same color as my arms.”
“Are you sure you’ll be able to swim?”
Miranda couldn’t keep a delighted grin off of her face. “Funny question to ask a mermaid. Just watch.” She swam twenty feet ahead of her friend, flipped a few somersaults and scissor kicked her way back. “They’re pefection.”
Chelsea’s expression was worried. “Easy for you to say now. Wait until you actually have to use them for the purpose they were intended for.”
“You worry too much.” Miranda drew up her legs – legs! – and hugged them to her chest. “How hard can it be to walk? Humans do it all the time.”
“Humans do lots of things you don’t want to emulate so that’s not a reassuring argument. I should have cast a spell that would give you the good sense to worry about your safety.” She cast a doubtful glance at Miranda. “And I should have thrown in more clothes while I was at it.”
Miranda laughed. “Stop fussing. I love this…what did you call it?”
“Bikini.”
Bikini. Odd name for what was essentially a set of flimsy white fabric clamshells with a gold metal ring between her breasts and a set of ties that went around her neck. The below the waist cover was even tinier but she loved the way it felt. She felt positively human in it. She hugged her friend. “This feels amazing Chelsea! You have to try it.”
Her friend’s facial features contorted into an expression of horror. “Never.”
Miranda took the other mermaid’s hand and squeezed it. “Thank you. For everything. You’re the best, Chelsea.”
“Yeah, right, every mermaid needs a friend who will curse her with human appendages and send her alone into heaven only knows what kind of trouble. I’m every mer-girl’s dream friend.”
“I won’t be alone,” Miranda reminded her. “I’m going to meet your mother at the surface, remember? You’ve let her know I’m coming?”
Chelsea closed her eyes for a long moment. When she opened them again she nodded. “Summer knows you’re coming and she said that Lockheed’s maid is leaving for her vacation today. By the time you get up to Lockheed’s house, Summer will meet you with a set of keys and instructions.”
“See, we’re all set.” In the interest of keeping Chelsea calm, Miranda decided not to ask any more questions about Summer. Chelsea and her mother were like water and oil. She would just have to keep her fingers crossed that Summer, a holdover from the free love days of the 60’s, would remember to show up on time.
Miranda let her gaze fall on the seaweed in the distance. She found the gentle sway soothing. A few brief trips to the surface aside, she’d had little contact with the human world. What would it be like to live where the air was dry? Could she handle living among humans? Could she get the job done that she’d promised to do? She rubbed her arms and shivered.
“Wait, Miranda, are you having second thoughts?”
Miranda looked at Chelsea. The anxiety in her friend’s eyes mirrored her own thoughts. But she wouldn’t give into her fear. Treading water for another moment was just asking for more worry to settle in and erode her confidence.
She smiled as reassuringly as possible. “Don’t worry, Chelsea. It’ll be smooth sailing from here on out.”
Chapter Two
Nearly home from his ritual morning five mile run along the
cliff path, Justin Lockheed paused at the rock outcrop that overlooked the strip of beach below his home. He took a long swig from his water bottle before splashing the remaining water onto his face. The run had done much to exhaust his body but he wished it could have done something to elevate his mood. The thought of one more day toiling away in a corner office placating high strung PR clients was more than he could bear.
He gazed out over the horizon but the charm of the Pacific was lost on him. Oceans were filled with water and he hated the water. The only reason he’d used an inheritance from an elderly uncle to purchase a home overlooking the ocean was to impress the wealthy corporate clientele he thought he would have by now. But here he was, thirty-four years old, employed by the same firm he’d joined right out of college, and he was still wrangling accounts that included a children’s party planner and a local pizza joint.
Justin stared unseeingly at the point where the sea met the sand. Was this what the rest of his life was going to be like? Were the rest of his days going to be as never-endingly predictable as the waves that rolled in, just one right after another? God help him if that was his fate. When he turned to go, a movement on the beach below caught his eye. He stepped nearer the edge to get a closer look.
He let out a low whistle as the figure below came into focus. A woman stood uncertainly at the water’s edge. He hadn’t seen her swim in, but then his eyes hadn’t been on the horizon. She had to be a heck of a swimmer to navigate such strong waves but perhaps it was her prowess in the water that accounted for her knock-out figure. Even at this distance he could see how toned and sculpted her arms and shoulders were.
His eyes traveled over her well-endowed form. She was wearing a white bikini that fit her like a second skin and her legs were long and gorgeous. She was too far away for him to make out her features but her reddish gold hair glistened in the sun. In a word, she was mesmerizing.
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