“I wouldn’t. I’d—” He snapped his mouth closed and looked away. They both knew he would, or at least knew enough to fear he might.
Despite that knowledge, Anna was disappointed. A part of her, a small irrational and hopelessly romantic part of her, had hoped he might put up a convincing argument.
I’ll never grow bored, not with you. You will always be enough for me.
But instead he looked away from her, and Anna wished she could curl up into a ball to ease the ache inside her chest.
Max’s next question nearly startled the ache right out of her. “Are you dallying with me?”
“What? No.” The denial came automatically, because it just seemed so absurd, the notion that she might be playing with him. But it took only a moment for her to realize she had answered in haste. “I don’t think so.”
“You don’t think—?”
“It is not my intention. I…” Now it was her turn to look away. “I care for you. I wish to be with you, for more than just today and tomorrow, but I cannot see my way to how. If that means I am dallying—”
“You wish to be with me?” Max cut in.
“Yes.”
“Well.” Max’s stance visibly relaxed. “Well then, this changes things.”
“It does?” No, it didn’t.
To her complete astonishment, a smile began to form on his face. “You want to be with me.”
“Well, yes, but—”
“Then you’ll be with me,” he declared. And with that, he resumed his seat on the blanket.
Anna stared at him, caught between horror and reluctant admiration at his capacity for arrogance. “Max, it doesn’t work like that.”
“We’ll make it work. We’ll figure it out.”
Figure it out? Isn’t that what they’d just tried to do? Didn’t they just fail? “I’m not sure—”
Max took her hand, squeezed it gently. “I want to be with you now, here on this blanket, under these stars. Do you want the same?”
“Yes.”
“Then let’s be together, and not waste a minute more of this beautiful night worrying about tomorrow.”
Anna considered it. She was more than happy to end a conversation she’d not wanted to have to start. And he wasn’t asking her to do anything she’d not already been doing since their first walk—namely, ignoring the fact that they had no future together. And so, when Max offered her an encouraging smile, she couldn’t see any reason not to smile back.
Except that she didn’t feel like smiling, particularly. She did it, for him, and for the hope that they might regain some of the enjoyment and easy companionship of earlier. But in truth, Anna knew things weren’t going to be the same again. Not tonight. Quite possibly never again.
Chapter 25
Anna returned to her chambers as the clock on her mantel struck one. Sighing, she dropped into the soft chair next to the fireplace and reached for the laces of her boots.
My God, what a day. So much had transpired between the time she’d woken up to now that she wasn’t sure how long it would take to sort it all through in her mind and come to some sort of—
A soft tap sounded on the glass of her balcony door. Her hand froze, her head turned. Surely not…
And there it was again.
“Pebbles,” she whispered, straightening. Someone was throwing pebbles at her balcony doors.
With a small, baffled sort of giggle, she rose from the chair and threw open the balcony doors, letting in a soft whoosh of fresh air. She stepped outside, peered over the iron railing, and discovered, without much surprise, that it was Max standing below.
He grinned at her and said, “Good morning, Anna,” in the exact same tone that he’d said, “Good night, Anna,” less than ten minutes ago.
She shook her head, laughing softly. “What on earth are you doing?”
“Romancing you.” He tossed aside the remainder of his pebbles. “Tell me I can come up.”
“Up? You mean climb up? Absolutely not. You’ll break your neck. Go inside and use the stairs. I’ll meet you in the hallway.”
“That’s not romance. That’s just sneaky.”
“It’s sensible.”
“Sensible?” he echoed, clearly disgusted. “To hell with that, I’m coming up.”
“Max, no, I…Oh, for…” Caught between amusement, irritation, and fear for his safety, she watched as he made his way up the uneven stone face of the house. “Serve you right if you fall and break your head, and don’t think for a moment I’ll…Good Lord, you are agile, aren’t you?”
The man was scaling the side of the house with remarkable speed. Within moments, he was parallel to the balcony. Then it was just a matter of grabbing hold and climbing over the railing, which he did with the easy grace of a cat.
Anna couldn’t help but notice that Max’s display of uncommon physical aptitude left her keenly aware of her own body. Most notably, the tingling sensation she was experiencing from head to toe. Attraction, she mused, was a strange and wondrous thing.
It was also something best kept under some control. Pushing her admiration for his climbing accomplishment aside, she scowled at Max. “You might have hurt yourself, you know.”
Max brushed dirt and mortar from his hands and clothes. “It’s not that far of a drop.”
“Far enough when there’s a perfectly good door on the other side of this room. Was it absolutely necessary you take the risk—?”
“Yes.” He gave his coat one last brush and stepped close to her. “I don’t like that we argued.” He smiled ruefully. “Again. But I do like grand gestures.”
“Yes, I’ve noticed,” she said and smiled in return. “I’m beginning to like them myself.”
“And I hate that in the midst of our arguing and then trying to move past all that arguing, and because of all the staff about…” He brought a hand up to cup her face. “I lost my chance to kiss you in the moonlight.”
“I hate that too,” she whispered, a second before he brought his mouth down on hers.
It was a sweet kiss to start, a gentle and romantic kind of kiss. The very sort Anna had imagined passed between her embracing couple in the garden.
Max’s arm slipped around her waist. Her arms twined around his neck, and for a long, wonderful while, there was nothing in the world to her but the two of them. There was only the heat of Max’s strong body pressed to hers, only the taste of him upon her tongue, only his scent of coffee and clean soap surrounding her.
There was only Max, kissing her.
Slowly, however, the kiss changed. The tingling feeling Anna had grew into an ache, making her restless. Suddenly, only kissing Max was no longer enough. She wanted so much more.
She pressed closer to him, and let her fingers slide up his neck to slip into his hair. Max shivered once and began to move. His hands roamed over her possessively, down her arms, across her waist, up her back. His mouth broke away from hers to travel across her jaw, nip lightly at her ear.
Anna heard her own ragged gasp, then a long sigh as Max trailed kisses down the sensitive skin of her neck.
This, she thought vaguely, this explained in a way even the most detailed lectures could not, why there were so many fallen women in the world.
Eager for the taste of him again, she urged his face back to hers and captured his mouth for a kiss that wasn’t quite so sweet now. It was determined, even desperate, a searing battle of tongue and lips that Anna hoped would go on forever—
Max pulled away with a ragged breath. “Enough.”
Anna shook her head. It wasn’t enough. She wanted so much more. Everything she could have from him, all the things she shouldn’t take. Her hands slipped down between them to dig into the soft fabric of his coat, pulling him back. “Come inside,” she whispered.
His hands caught hers and trapped them against his chest. “I didn’t come here for that.”
“I know.” That made the invitation all the easier. “Come inside, anyway.”
The
invitation, it would seem, was all he needed. His arms banded around her again, his mouth came down to move strongly over hers. And once more, Anna’s world narrowed down to her and Max and the passion that built between them.
She would never be able to fully remember how they went from standing on the balcony, to standing inside, nor how it was that she was able to divest him of his boots, coat, and waistcoat, or when it was, exactly, that he’d pulled the pins from her hair and undone the buttons of her gown.
A part of her knew what they were doing was wrong. Well, all of her knew it was wrong, but there was only that one small voice in the back of her head that was still audible over the roar of blood in her ears.
It wasn’t terribly difficult to silence it. This was just like the kiss in the nursery, only more, she reasoned. There would be no other gentleman callers for her. No other passionate kisses in the moonlight. There would be no other Max. And so she would have this one experience. She would take advantage of him this one night. She would take the risk for herself.
She tried to hurry things along by stepping out of her shoes, helping him divest her of her gown and stockings.
She heard him whisper, “Slow down, sweet,” but she shook her head and urged him toward the bed.
Probably, it was not the done thing for a woman to be so aggressive. No doubt it was not expected of most virgins. But to hell with expectations. She wanted Max, and she wanted him now, before either of them could change their minds.
Max bent, slipped his arm beneath Anna’s knees, and hauled her off her feet.
God, he did like the weight of her in his arms.
He laid her on the bed, slipped out of his shirt, and tormented himself by slowly lifting Anna’s chemise over her head, exposing the heated skin beneath inch by inch.
“Beautiful,” he whispered and drew his hands over her slowly, purposefully, in direct contrast to Anna’s frantic movements and his own raging instinct to take as much as he could as quickly as possible.
He needed to slow them both down. Particularly her. Anna’s hands were everywhere, brushing down his back, up his arms. Inquisitive fingers speared through his hair, explored his chest. It was more enthusiasm than technique. And it was devastating. Everything about the woman destroyed him.
The enormity of his want for Anna was something he’d never experienced with another woman. No fine lady, innocent miss, merry widow, or experienced courtesan had ever tempted him the way she tempted him. But if they kept up at their current pace, it would be over too soon for the both of them.
He caught her wrists, pinning them gently against the mattress, and took her mouth in a slow and gentle kiss meant to settle them both.
This was Anna. This was the woman of his dreams, the object of his fantasies, the woman he would make his wife. He wanted to make the night last, if not forever, at least long enough to leave no doubt in her mind what it meant to him, how important it was for him to please her. How much she was needed.
Which was not going to happen in a ten-minute romp atop the counterpane.
Anna arched beneath him, tugging her arms. “Let me go.”
“I will.” He bit gently on her bottom lip. “Wait.”
“But—”
“Trust me,” he whispered, knowing it was no small thing he asked of her. “Please.”
When she sighed and relaxed beneath him, he kissed her again, softly, then set out to earn that trust. He explored every inch of her body, tasting and touching, looking for anything that pleased her, everything that made her gasp and shiver.
He brushed his palm along the sides of her breasts, watched her arch her back and shudder. He bent his head to flick his tongue across a taut nipple and listened to her sweet moan, felt her fingers dig into his shoulders.
Slowly, steadily he built the heat between them, removing the last barriers of clothing and inhibitions until there was only the slide of skin on skin, and she was twisting with need beneath him.
“Max.”
His name spilling from her lips was more than he could take. Now, he thought, dragging her legs up to wrap around his hips. With a groan of his own, he pressed forward into the wet heat of her, moving past resistance with a long, steady push. His hands dug into the sheets as the sharp pleasure of being inside her washed over him in waves.
It felt like heaven.
Less so, evidently, for Anna. She gave a short cry of pain and went utterly still, except for her hand, which delivered an open-palmed slap to the side of his head.
He scarcely felt it, but he was keenly aware of her obvious discomfort. Bloody hell, he should have taken more care.
Desperate to soothe, he sought a way to apologize, to make things right again. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, love. I should have…” He wasn’t all that sure what he should have done differently. He’d never bedded a virgin before. “I should have warned you. Told you what to expect.”
She blew out a small, jagged breath, then reached up to stroke his hair. “It’s all right. It will pass.”
“I—” If he’d been capable of it, he would have laughed. The woman was comforting him. Because of course she’d known what to expect. She was the daughter of Mrs. Wrayburn. The experience was new, and this particular part of it was unpleasant for her, but none of it came as a surprise.
Anna brushed a lock of hair off his forehead. “I’m sorry I hit you. I didn’t mean…Have I ruined this?”
“No, love.” He bent his head, brushed his lips across her brow. “No.”
“Kiss me again?” she whispered.
“Sweetheart, you don’t need to ask.” He settled with his lips just a breath away from hers. “Take what you want.”
In that moment, Max was willing to offer anything she wanted, anything she cared to demand or take for herself.
As Anna cupped his face in her hands and brought his mouth to meet hers, Max sent up a small but heartfelt prayer that what she would ultimately want was him. All of him. The good, the wicked, the gentleman, and the scoundrel.
God knew, he wanted every part of her in return. But he would start with this, he thought—the long, soft lines of her, the feel of her under him, around him, and the delicious relief of sensing her begin to relax.
He moved tentatively, gauging her reaction to a nicety—her indrawn breath, the flutter of lashes, the short sigh of pleasure. Emboldened, he set a slow and gentle pace and watched the blush of desire return to her cheeks.
When he was certain, absolutely certain that there was only pleasure for her, he closed his eyes and gave himself over to the wild ecstasy of moving inside her. There was only Anna, warm, beautiful, incredible Anna, and the overwhelming sight of her lost to passion and searching for its peak.
Her gasps turned to cries, those cries grew higher in pitch. And when at last she came apart in his arms, Max wrapped them around her tighter, buried his face against her neck, and gave in to his own pleasure.
Chapter 26
Anna woke alone, turned her face into the soft beam of sunlight filtering around the drapes, and smiled. Max had left before dawn, waking her with a soft kiss on the forehead and a whispered something in her ear she couldn’t make out but was quite certain was lovely. Pity he’d not been able to stay and whisper it to her again when she was fully awake.
With a sigh, she rolled out of bed and began to wash and dress, noticing a number of unfamiliar aches and pains. She was just finishing pinning up her hair when her eyes fell on the leather satchel her mother had given her, lying atop the vanity. Anna fingered the leather strap, considering. She could burn the letters now, and probably should out of respect to the late Lady Engsly.
But before she could do that…Anna picked up the satchel and upended its contents onto the vanity. She wanted to know what else might be in those letters.
She picked one at random, but a rap at the door pulled her attention away before she could so much as open the letter.
“Come in,” she called, assuming it was a maid.
It was
Max who appeared in her doorway. “You really ought to ask who it is first. What if there were other guests in the house?”
“Max, what—” She hurried across the room, grabbed him by the arm, and dragged him inside, shutting the door behind her. “What are you doing? What if someone saw—?”
“If there was someone about to see, I’d not have knocked.” He slipped an arm around her waist and pulled her close. “Come here,” he demanded with a smile a moment before he took her mouth in a short, but tremendously sweet kiss. Pulling back, he touched his lips to the tip of her nose. “I’ve been wanting that since I left.”
Anna felt heat rise to her cheeks, and wished her education on carnal matters had included some hint on what a woman was to say to a gentleman after all else was done.
“Good morning,” she tried. It was better than nothing.
Fortunately, Max seemed to like it well enough. His hazel eyes danced with humor and affection. “Good morning. I thought…” He trailed off and scowled when he saw what she was holding, then noticed the mess on the vanity. “Are you reading those?”
“I was about to. I thought they might contain information of interest. Perhaps my birthday?”
His gaze snapped to hers when she mentioned her birthday, and the scowl immediately disappeared. “Right. Yes, of course.” He held out his hand, waggled his finger. “Give it here. I’ll read them for you.”
“What, all of them?”
“No, five, and then I’m sure I’ve better things to do.”
Anna rolled her eyes, bit the inside of her cheek to keep from smiling. “We can read them together. But not here. If a maid or one of the Haverstons were to come…”
“The library, then. Five minutes.”
He didn’t give her the chance to argue. He planted another quick kiss on her lips, then released her and sauntered out of the room.
Practically Wicked Page 27
