Melissa can hear the smile in his voice as he asks the question and his sincerity makes her feel like even more of a heel for not being able to give him a proper answer. For a moment she thinks about telling Hawk that she’s a reporter. But she brushes off the thought, knowing that even though she’s attracted to him, she still has a job to do.
“Well, what do you want to know? I’ve dated a few guys, no-one serious until college.” Melissa feels Hawk’s arms tighten around her and she likes that she’s evoking the cave-man response in him. “I thought I was in love, turns out not so much. He became a little possessive, jealous, basically he turned into a grade A douchebag.” She feels Hawk’s chuckle reverberate through her. “When I broke it off he didn’t get the memo. He kept on calling me, turning up at places where he knew I’d be. It got a little…”
“Creepy?” Hawk helpfully supplies the word through gritted teeth.
“Yeah, I guess so. Ali called him a stalker, said I should report him to the police. But that seemed a little far. He wasn’t dangerous, just a little confused.” Melissa swallows hard, not knowing why she’s telling Hawk more than anyone apart from Ali knew, only knowing that she wanted to. “One night he came by, tried to come in the house, he’d had a little to drink and things got out of hand. He got physical.”
She feels Hawk stiffen against her. “He hit you?” The anger in his voice is palpable.
“No, he was after something a little more intimate than that…” She feels herself blush and bites her lip, wishing that she hadn’t gone down this road with a guy she barely even knows.
Hawk takes her shoulders and turns her around to face him. She sees the anger blazing in his eyes. “He forced you?”
Melissa shakes her head quickly and watches as the tension in his body eases ever so slightly. “No. Things didn’t get anywhere near that far. I got him in a choke-hold and threw him out.” She shrugs like it was no big deal. That night she had been completely shook up. When Ali had gotten home she’d told her all about it, too shocked to even cry.
“Jesus Christ.” He pulls her towards him, holding her in his arms and she feels like she’s melting against him. When he seems satisfied that she’s all still in one piece, he pulls back to look at her again. “Did you tell the police?”
Melissa shakes her head again. “He was drunk. He didn’t know what he was doing. I think he was so far gone he thought we were still together. The next morning he didn’t remember any of it. It was like it hadn’t happened. When I told him what he did he couldn’t believe it. He begged for forgiveness. He was more upset about it than I was.” Melissa smiles sadly as she remembers that conversation. “He still sends me flowers and chocolates. It’s like he can’t let go. He’s creepy but he’s not a bad guy. He would never hurt me.”
Hawk frowns at her as if she’s completely insane. Ali had given her the same look when she’d told her she wasn’t filing charges against him. But Melissa could never do that. No matter how disappointed she was in him, she couldn’t destroy his life over something he didn’t even remember had happened.
“If he ever tries anything again, he’ll wish he hadn’t.” Hawk’s eyes blaze with pent-up anger and, from the look on his face, Melissa doesn’t doubt that he would make good on that threat. He pulls her towards him again, kissing her deeply, possessively, protectively.
When she comes up for air she smiles at him goofily. “I like it when you do that.”
“Good, because I plan to do a whole lot more of it.” His teasing smile makes her heart thud in her chest.
She schools her features, more serious now. “So it’s clear you have some pretty strong feelings about protecting women. What’s that all about?” He frowns as if she’s hit a nerve and she quickly back-pedals, not wanting to cause him any pain. “Sorry that was out of line. You don’t have to tell me.” She starts to pull away from him but he stops her.
“No, you told me something that I’m guessing not a lot of people know. I’m just returning the favor.” He shrugs and looks out onto the lake. Melissa gets the impression that he’s gone somewhere else. “My dad – he was kind of a disciplinarian. He liked to scare us, liked to use his fists. I watched him hit my mom every day until I got old enough to hit him back. Eventually he left, cleaned out our bank accounts – what little was in there – took the car, the TV, pretty much anything of value that he could get his hands on. Never saw him again.” He shrugs again, as if to say ‘that’s all’ and there’s a steel glint in his eyes that almost seems to challenge her to pity him.
Pity, however, is the farthest thing from her mind. “Sounds like good riddance to bad rubbish to me.” She takes his hand and squeezes it, wishing she could take a pop at the man that had terrorized Hawk as a child. “Are you and your mom still close?”
“We try to be. But it’s complicated.” He throws her a forced smile. “I guess you wouldn’t know much about that, though.”
Melissa straightens her spine and raises an eyebrow at him, giving him a challenging look. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing, just that you seem to be the white picket fence, two point four kids, model home kind of girl.” The look he gives her tells her that he’s only half joking.
She feels a flicker of indignation that Hawk thinks he has her all worked out. “Well, for starters the house I grew up in didn’t have a white picket fence.” She ticks the points off on her fingers as Hawk watches amusement lighting up his gorgeous face. “Secondly, I’m an only child. Thirdly, my definition of a model home doesn’t equal your dad walking out on your mom when she was pregnant with you, and never seeing him again. My mom worked hard, did her best, gave me everything she could. I was fortunate but that doesn’t make me a princess with a perfect little life with no problems.” By the time she’s finished her tirade she’s aware that her voice has risen, but she’s too angry to care. “So don’t make assumptions and judge me when you don’t know anything about me.”
Hawk blinks at her, surprised. “I didn’t mean to judge you. I’m just usually pretty good at reading people, but I guess I was wrong.” He ducks his head in apology and Melissa feels her anger melt away. “But I don’t think it’s fair for you to say that I don’t know anything about you. I think I know quite a lot about you.”
“Oh really?” The anger in her voice has been replaced by flirtation and Hawk seems to register the change in her demeanor. “So what is it that you think you know?”
He shifts a little closer to her. “Well I know you’re really cute when you get angry.” She rolls her eyes at him but allows herself an inward smile. “I know you have a good heart and you try to see the best in people. I know you’re smart and funny and that you’ve got some killer moves.” He pauses, looking at her more seriously now. “I know you have the most amazing eyes I’ve ever seen. I know I like you. And I know you like me, too.”
Melissa feels herself redden and, automatically, she goes to correct him. “And what makes you so sure about that?”
He gives her a knowing look. “Apart from the way you blushed just then?” He gives her a lopsided smile. “Just a lucky guess, I suppose.”
“Yeah right.” She punches him playfully on the arm but he catches her wrist and pulls her towards him again, kissing her thoroughly.
“Am I wrong?” He pulls back to look at her, his eyes dark.
Melissa shakes her head, not even trying to pretend that she feels any other way.
“Good. Now that’s settled. You should come tonight, to the bar, meet some of the guys.” He pulls her against him again, settling her against his broad chest.
“The guys?” She feels her heart thump loudly in her chest at the reminder of how she came to be in Hawk’s arms at all.
“The guys from the MC, the club I mentioned last night.” His voice is filled with warmth as he talks about them. “I want you to meet them.”
“Is that what Felicia was talking about earlier in the shop? About you having to concentrate on getting into the club?
” Melissa is playing dumb but it’s the best way to get Hawk to open up.
“Yeah, she knows it’s kind of been an obsession of mine since we were kids. I’m a prospect now so I still have to prove myself to the club, but it shouldn’t be long until I’m a fully patched member of the Kings.” The pride in his voice is easy to hear.
“The Kings?” She pretends complete ignorance.
“Caged Kings, it’s the name of the club,” he explains.
“It doesn’t sound all that friendly. But I guess you can’t really name a motorcycle club Rainbows and Kittens!” She’s grateful that Hawk laughs at her lame joke.
“Don’t worry about the guys. Their bark is way worse than their bite…most of the time. Anyway, they’ll love you. How could they not? I want you to meet them.” The excitement in his voice at the prospect makes Melissa feel like even more of a big fat liar, if that were possible.
“They’re important to you.” It’s a statement of fact rather than a question.
“It’s a brotherhood.” Melissa feels Hawk shrug behind her. “They’re my family; that’s just how it works.”
Melissa feels her gut clench as she asks the question that she knows she has to, still playing the naïve card. “But…aren’t motorcycle clubs kind of dangerous? Like not totally above board?” She holds her breath for his reaction.
“It’s not as black and white as that. There are a lot of shades of grey.” She feels him shrug again. “It’s not something we really talk about outside of the club.”
Melissa responds without thinking, saying what is in her heart rather than what is in her head. “It’s all right. You can trust me.”
She feels Hawk’s arms tighten around her. “That’s not an easy thing for me to do.” There’s a tightness in his voice that wasn’t there before.
“Then we can take things one step at a time.” She relaxes into his arms, feeling warm and safe and protected and like the biggest liar of all time.
CHAPTER TEN
Felicia’s statement that Saturday night at the bar is busy is the biggest understatement of the century. It’s full to bursting and everywhere Melissa looks there are bikers. The look that Hawk had given her when he’d arrived to pick her up from the house told her she had made an impression. After the wardrobe malfunction from the night before, Melissa had decided to look more like herself. She’d gone for a natural look with her makeup and in her skinny jeans and figure-hugging tank top; she was comfortable in her own skin. She had expected Ali to be all over her, telling her to be careful, that these bikers were dangerous, but she actually seemed to be relieved that Melissa was going out there and having fun.
As soon as she and Hawk walk into the bar, there are shouts of welcome from the guys and some of the women. Hawk smiles as he introduces her to members of the club. Melissa is surprised at just how many of them there are and how a lot of them just look like normal guys. She doesn’t know what she was expecting but it hadn’t been this. They’re funny, considerate, and clearly like to have a good time.
As the night wears on and the guys drink a little more, they lose their inhibitions and start talking more openly about ‘work.’ Melissa manages to piece together the stuff that the club (and, by extension, Hawk) is into. She sees pot being dealt over the counter of the bar numerous times and the smell lingers in the air. These guys clearly aren’t trying very hard to hide what they’re doing. Besides, cannabis was virtually legal now so the most they would probably get is a slap on the wrist and a warning not to do it again. It was hardly enough to turn the bikers into drug-dealing devils.
She and Hawk play pool and she tries to put together everything that she’s heard, but it’s hard to reconcile that these men she’s just met are serious criminals, despite the fact she knows they are. It isn’t hard to understand what Hawk likes about the life, what he’s attracted to. It really feels like a family, a little on the wild side, but still a family. They care about each other, look out for each other, and slowly she feels her defenses go down. She stops looking at them like a story.
“What’re you thinking?” Hawk is by her side, leaning lazily on his stick and giving her one of his signature sexy smiles.
“Just that I’m glad I came, that I’m glad I met you.” She laughs against his mouth as he pulls her in for a kiss. She can taste the sweetness of the whisky on his tongue and it’s intoxicating. They explore each other’s mouths, kissing for longer than she ever has in public, Hawk’s hands splaying at the base of her back until she’s right up against him, leaving her in no doubt that he wants to do more than just kiss. When they finally pull apart breathless, their hearts racing, there’s a roar that goes up from the crowd and Melissa feels herself blush like a schoolgirl.
“So, Melissa, are you Hawk’s Old Lady?” One of the older bikers, Clark shouts the question over the ruckus.
“I have no idea what that means.” Melissa looks between him and an embarrassed Hawk.
“It means that Clark has had a few too many and is talking crap.” Hawk shoots the older man a warning look and Melissa frowns, wondering what she had missed.
Clark ignores the younger man’s look and motions Melissa over to him. She looks at Hawk, sees that he’s mad, and follows Clark’s orders, just to find out what’s got him all riled up. Clark is the complete opposite of Hawk; he is short and round and totally inebriated. He hooks his arm over Melissa’s shoulder and leans in like he’s telling her a secret. “Don’t mind him. He’s just a little sensitive.” He waves over in Hawk’s direction. “But let me tell you something, Hawk is the best prospect we’ve ever had. He’s our most trusted guy and he’ll go far in the club, you mark my words.” Clark nods his head wisely at her and she finds herself mimicking his actions. “He always delivers, he always gets the job done, no matter what.”
Melissa winces at the thought of what that caveat might include, but pushes the thought away, Now really wasn’t the time. “Are you bigging Hawk up to me? Because you don’t really need to.” She gives him a look that speaks volumes and Clark laughs loudly, slapping her on the back so hard she stumbles.
“So what’s so fucking funny?” Hawk stands in front of them, looking like he wants to shake Clark.
“Nothing, Prospect, nothing at all.” Clark clears his throat, looking like he’s suddenly sobered up and Melissa wonders if he’d been pretending to be drunk just to get her to admit what she had about Hawk. The sly old fox, she thinks to herself, as he winks at her, telling her that her suspicions are completely founded.
“Right.” Hawk rolls his eyes at the older man good-naturedly. “You need a hand getting home, Clark?” Melissa can see the concern in his eyes.
“The day I need a babysitter to take me home is the day I give up my jacket.” He levels Hawk with a look that tells the younger man he isn’t kidding around and Hawk holds up his hands in surrender. “Besides, you have other plans tonight, I’m guessing.” He throws Melissa another wink and heads to the bar shouting for another round of drinks on him.
Hawk shakes his head as he stares after Clark and looks back at her a little sheepishly. “Sorry about Clark. He gets a little carried away sometimes, but his heart’s in the right place.”
“Yours, too, from what I can tell.” Melissa smiles at him surprised to find that she can’t come up with any reasons to think badly of him, or any of the other men in the bar.
He leans in and kisses her thoroughly, his hands going into her hair, deepening the kiss as she wraps her arms around his neck, pulling him up against her. Her entire body feels alive and tingling and all they’ve done is kiss.
“So pretty.” He murmurs the words against her lips as he strokes a line along her jaw and down her neck. His eyes are dark with desire and his pupils are dilated. Melissa doesn’t need a mirror to know that she looks the same. “Come on, I’m taking you home.” He takes hold of her hand and starts to march her towards the door, not waiting for her response and ignoring the shouts from the men around him.
Josh app
ears out of nowhere with that stealth mode of his and settles a fatherly hand on Hawk’s shoulder, stopping him in his tracks. He smiles at Melissa, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he takes them both in and then he’s back to business. “Don’t be late tomorrow. Remember, we’re breaking in the new guy and I need my best mechanic there.”
Hawk nods curtly. “I’ll be there.” He doesn’t waste any more time, virtually dragging Melissa until they’re right by the door.
CARSON_Satan’s Ravens MC Page 28
