by Lucy Gordon
‘I’ll take you to the car,’ he said.
‘Garth—’ she cried. She was suddenly scared.
‘Faye.’ He said her name so softly that she barely heard. He reached out and touched her cheek and there was something in his eyes that broke her heart. Abruptly he seized her and pulled her hard against him, burying his face in her hair. Then, just as quickly, he thrust her from him.
‘Goodbye, Faye,’ he said hoarsely, and turned back inside.
It was all over, she thought, as she was borne home. The distance he’d set between them recently had been a warning. Tonight he’d played his part so beautifully that she had been taken in.
In her heart she knew what she would find when she reached home. There would be a letter announcing that everything was over between them. He’d had all he needed of her.
Nancy was waiting up to put the children to bed. She didn’t comment on Garth’s absence. Nor did she look at Faye as she said, ‘There’s something in your room. He told me to put it there when you’d all left.’
The envelope was lying on her pillow, her name written in Garth’s bold hand. With trembling hands she opened it, and read:
My darling Faye,
This is the hardest letter I’ve ever had to write, because it’s a goodbye, and that’s a word I swore I’d never say to you. I love you so much. I never stopped loving you for a moment, but I killed your love and couldn’t get it back.
Once it seemed easy. I thought I had the power to force you back to me. I managed it in one way, but the more we were together, the more I realized that your heart had slipped away. Perhaps I was never the man for you. I only seem to make you unhappy.
There’s something you must know. When Barker was dying I went to Kendall Haines and begged him to use his influence to get James Wakeham. I meant to tell you next day, when things were calmer. But I never did, because that night something happened that changed everything.
Earlier Cindy had asked me to have Barker put to sleep. She said, ‘If you love someone, you’ve got to let them go, if it’s best for them.’
I didn’t see the implications for us at first, but then you loved me with such sweetness and warmth that I knew only the best was good enough for you. And the best is to escape from me. You once said that nobody could be happy with me. And you were right.
So I never told you about approaching Haines, because it might have made it harder for you to leave me. I didn’t want you staying because I’d ‘earned’ it, but only because you loved me. And you’re safer not loving me.
I learned something about Haines too, that night. He’s not the man you think he is. He co-opted his secretary to fill your place without much loss of time. I wasn’t sure whether to tell you, or whether it would be interfering in your life. You might not even have believed me. But now I won’t be here, you must know the truth. Don’t marry him, my darling. Wait for someone else who’s better than both of us.
It’s taken me too long to learn wisdom from my daughter, but I know now that the truest way I can show my love is by letting you go.
I won’t be returning to Elm Ridge. I want you and Cindy and Adrian to stay there. After the divorce I’d like to see the children often, but I promise never to trouble you.
It’s the tenth anniversary of our wedding, and I’ve showered you with diamonds, as the firm expected me to. But my real anniversary gift is something else. You’ll find it in a parcel next to this letter. I wonder if you’ll recognize it. If so, I like to think it will still mean something to you.
Goodbye, my dearest. I love you so very much.
Garth.
She had to read the letter twice. There was a blank look in her eyes as the incredible truth came home to her, and she let out her breath in a long sigh.
‘You fool,’ she murmured. ‘How could you be so blind?’
But did she mean him, or herself? She honestly couldn’t have said.
The little parcel lay on the bed. It was plainly wrapped in brown paper and carried no tag. She was almost afraid as she opened it.
Inside she found the tin plate Garth had mentioned in his speech, with the two entwined hearts scratched in the centre. Tears began to roll down her cheeks. She’d thought he’d tossed those early days aside contemptuously, but he’d remembered as vividly as herself. Despite his brash exterior, he’d secretly treasured this memento all these years. Now it had a slightly forlorn, abandoned look.
Her happiness was almost too great to be borne, but her tears still flowed. They were for him, going away, believing that she didn’t love him. How could it end this way? How could two people who loved each other so much manage to lose each other?
Then her head went up. She wasn’t going to give in without a fight. With trembling fingers she dialled the airport number and was put through to Bill’s little cubby hole.
‘Bill, it’s Faye. Is Garth there yet?’
‘No, but he’s due at any moment. Our take-off slot is in half an hour.’
‘He mustn’t go. Bill, you’ve got to stop him.’
‘Stop him?’ Bill sounded aghast. ‘You mean you want me to give him a message from you?’
‘No, there’s no message.’ Garth could be stubborn when he’d made a decision. If he knew she was following him, he would leave all the faster.
‘Then I can’t delay him,’ Bill protested.
‘You simply must. Develop a mechanical breakdown, chuck a spanner in the engine. Anything. But stop him leaving.’
Bill’s voice became plaintive. ‘Mrs Clayton, have you any idea what’s it’s like being caught between the two of you? You’re as bad as each other.’
‘I’m sure you can manage to think of something, Bill.’
She found Nancy. ‘I’ve got to go out.’
‘At this hour? Where are you going?’
‘To save my marriage,’ Faye said and hurried outside.
She was a careful driver, who disliked driving at night. But when she saw the road clear ahead she put down her foot. She was relying on Bill to hold Garth up, but how long could he manage it?
Half an hour kept throbbing through her brain. Half an hour and it might all be too late. It was no use to argue that she could contact him later. The moment was now and if she missed it, it would have gone forever.
‘Wait for me, Garth,’ she murmured as she drove. ‘Don’t take off. Listen to me calling you. Listen to my love, and turn back to me.’
At last she could see the lights in the distance which told her she was nearing the airport. Luckily the security guard recognized her.
‘Has my husband taken off yet?’ she asked in terrible fear.
‘Just about to.’
‘No,’ she cried frantically.
As the hangar came into sight she could just make out two figures walking towards the plane. One of them was Bill, who seemed to be arguing frantically. The other was Garth. With the wind in her direction Faye could hear him say, ‘That’s enough, Bill. Now let’s get on, I’m in a hurry.’
‘Garth!’ she called. ‘Garth!’
But the wind whipped her words away and she knew he hadn’t heard her. She’d reached the steel barrier, beyond which she couldn’t take the car. Wildly she jumped out, pushed through a small gap in the barrier and began to run as if her life depended on it.
‘Garth!’ she screamed.
At last he heard her. She saw him stop, but he didn’t turn. It was as if he feared an hallucination so sweet that it must be resisted.
She called his name again and this time he looked round, his face torn between hope and despair as he saw her.
‘I love you,’ she called. ‘We all love you. Don’t leave us.’
He began to run back to her, but at the last moment something stopped him. ‘Faye, did you get my letter?’ he called.
‘Yes, I read it, and you’ve got everything wrong. We love you. Don’t you understand? We love you.’
‘We?’
love you. I always have. It broke my heart to le
ave you two years ago, but I thought you didn’t love me.’ She drew nearer to him. ‘After the night we came together I was sure everything would be all right, but then you pushed me away.’
‘I was afraid. I thought I’d taken advantage of you— You were so unhappy— The brandy— Maybe you didn’t know what you were doing—’
‘One glass! What do you think I am? Some brainless little girl who needs her hand held? Maybe I was when I married you, but not now. Garth, how dare you make this decision without consulting me. I knew exactly what
I was doing that night. I was loving you, and that’s what I meant to do.’
‘Faye—’
‘And I’m going to go on doing it. I’m sure about that too. You’re not going to France tonight.’
‘Aren’t I?’
‘No, because this time I’m making the decision. And my decision is that you’re coming home with me, and we’re going to awaken our children and tell them that our marriage is on again, and this time it’s for ever.’
He came close and searched her face. ‘Is that what we’re going to do?’ he asked breathlessly.
‘That’s exactly what we’re going to do. Any arguments?’
He seized her in his arms.
‘Not from me,’ he said joyfully. ‘Let’s go and do it right now.’
