And just like that, without planning to, really, Anna pressed her lips against his.
The heartbeat in her chest seemed to speed up to a high frequency buzz. Her chest filled with—she wasn’t quite sure with what. Excitement. Nerves.
Arousal.
She felt alive, like every one of her was synapses firing at an intensity she wouldn’t have thought possible before. Her whole body was electric, every inch of her skin highly sensitized.
Michael reached for her, slipping his hand behind her neck and cradling her as he returned her kiss. Their tongues collided and fireworks seemed to erupt behind her closed eyelids.
It was so beautiful, she had to fight back tears.
And just like that, it was over. Michael withdrew his hand and pulled away.
Anna opened her eyes in distress. Why? Why did he stop?
“I’m sorry, this isn’t fair on you,” Michael stammered. He refused to look her in the eye.
Had she misread the situation completely? Had he not just brought her here to this incredibly romantic spot and showed her all the beauty that lay at their feet? Had he not just tried to convince her that immortality wasn’t as scary and alien as it had seemed to be at first?
Did he not care for her?
“I’m sorry?”
“I shouldn’t have done that,” he said, shaking his head. “I’m your maker. It’s inappropriate.”
Anna didn’t know what to do or where to look as he got up, dusted off his trousers, and took a few steps away from her. She’d faced rejection in the past, but nothing like this. He’d been into it just now, hadn’t he?
“I don’t understand,” she mumbled, and wrapped her arms around herself protectively.
“Look.” Michael reached for her shoulder, then stopped about an inch away. “I’m really sorry. I got carried away in the moment. This isn’t right. I’ve taken advantage of your situation and I shouldn’t have. This is your first night as a vampire, and you don’t need to be wrapped up in all this.”
Anna frowned. Taken advantage? What the hell was he talking about?
“I kissed you,” she said. “If anyone took advantage—”
Michael shook his head. “No. I’m sorry. I’m going to go inside now. If you need anything, I’ll be in the library.”
Anna’s throat tightened, making it impossible for her to respond. Before she had the chance to regain her composure, he’d walked across to the edge of the roof and climbed down, possibly to enter through a nearby window.
Unbelievable .
She didn’t recall ever being faced with a guy acting this hot and cold around her, but then of course she wouldn’t. She didn’t remember much of anything.
What did it mean?
Anna pulled her legs up, wrapped her arms around them, and rested her chin on top of her knees.
A lot had happened today, and perhaps some peace and quiet was exactly what she needed. Not that it was particularly quiet up here. She could hear traffic, as well as the occasional siren, miles away. She tried to focus on the rustling of fallen leaves being carried by the odd winter breeze in the park.
That kiss, though. Holy hell. Despite the awkwardness of his sudden departure, and the confusion he left her in, she couldn’t get it out of her mind.
Was everything just more intense now that she was no longer mortal? He had overwhelmed her, turned her into a mushy mess of emotions and sensations that felt completely alien. Considering she didn’t have her memory back yet, this was essentially her first ever kiss now. She hated that it had to end so soon.
Although it was probably for the best. She had enough to worry already about without adding relationship issues into the mix.
If a little kiss felt this amazing, then what was sex like?
Anna groaned. She’d be a lot better off banning these speculations from her mind. He wasn’t into her, or at the very least, he didn’t consider her ready, whatever that meant.
And she wasn’t about to throw herself at some guy she’d known all of what—ten hours? Most of those hours she’d been passed out. How could she even know what kind of guy he was?
Plus, she wasn’t that kind of woman.
She might not remember the finer details of her old life, but she was certain of that fact.
Plus, he wasn’t even into her. Or was he?
Chapter Seven
Stupid, stupid, stupid!
Michael paced restlessly around the library. No matter how much Alexander seemed to like this place for its calming influence, Michael couldn’t find any peace.
He’d slipped up and given in to old habits.
Anna had hardly gotten the chance to get used to her new life, and he’d jumped in headfirst and let his cock do the thinking for him. Not only would it make things awkward going forward, it was downright inappropriate.
Michael had heard the old stories of vampires who turned women for their own pleasure, and he’d always rejected the thought. To his mind, a maker was equivalent to a father figure, or at the very least, an older sibling of sorts, making what had happened downright wrong.
He was an admirer of the female form, sure, but he wasn’t underhanded or dishonest about it. He’d never forced himself on anyone.
And yet, up on the roof he’d taken advantage of his position. As her maker, he was an authority figure of sorts. Anna didn’t have anyone in this new life except for him. That didn’t give her much of a choice but to indulge him if he went too far.
Of course, Michael hadn’t consciously tried to, but the more comfortable he’d gotten around her, the more easily he had slipped into his regular moves. She was an attractive woman, so he’d tried to seduce her. Now he couldn’t forgive himself for it.
He should have known better.
The grandfather clock upstairs struck seven times, signaling that sunrise was dangerously close. He balled his fists as he left the library. As much as he wanted to stay away from Anna for a while, he couldn’t risk her getting caught unaware in the sun and burn to death.
As he approached the stairs, he heard movement on the upper floor. Perhaps she’d felt the urge to head inside already. Newly made vampires had good survival instincts, though some felt the warning signs more keenly than others.
“Just making sure you’re inside for sunrise,” he called out.
No response.
Michael made his way up the stairs and through the hallway, only to find Anna waiting in the doorway of her room.
She averted her gaze from him. Clearly their earlier encounter had made her feel awkward too. If only he could express how sorry he was… Instead, he stood in front of her now with nothing to say.
“So I should stay here all day?” she asked, fidgeting with the bottom hem of her borrowed pullover. He took a step back, making sure to respect her personal space.
“You’ll be safe in here. All the windows in this house have blackout blinds,” Michael said.
He stole a glimpse at her, top to bottom. The outfit she’d found was far from stylish, but somehow, she made it look good.
Enough with the inappropriate thoughts already!
“Oh, if you want, we could buy a few things for you to wear tomorrow… You know, until you remember where you lived before and we pick up your things,” Michael suggested.
Anna shrugged. “Whatever you say.”
She suppressed a yawn and went inside, shutting the door behind her without looking back even once.
What a mess. Just as Anna had finally started to warm up around him and accept the things he’d told her, he’d trampled all over her budding trust in him.
Throughout the day, sleep eluded Michael, who continued to toss and turn until his body felt the arrival of dusk. He couldn’t stop thinking about Anna, obviously. How she’d tried to act strong and confident, when he had first tried to explain what had happened to her. And how vulnerable she’d been once she realized she didn’t have control of her new urges.
He never planned to become someone’s maker, b
ut once he no longer had a choice, he’d been determined to do the best job he could. And then of course he had betrayed his own intentions and ruined everything when he kissed her.
It should have never happened. But now that it had, he couldn’t undo it, neither could he ignore the effect it had on him.
Their kiss had been unlike any he had shared with anyone before.
The pull he felt toward her was so intense, he’d found it impossible to resist her. And when their lips connected, it had released a whole host of alien feelings within him.
He loved women and had bedded so many over the years that he had lost count. But he wasn’t a selfish lover; what he loved the most during any of his encounters was the pleasure he was able to give to his partners. Those special little things he could do that human men couldn’t.
A woman’s face signaling the peak of her orgasm was the most rewarding thing he’d ever seen, and it was those moments that he’d kept chasing during the past three decades of his renewed life. His own physical satisfaction had always been an afterthought.
But with Anna, during that short kiss, he’d felt something deeper and more primal. He’d felt the need to make her his. And he also felt like a pervert for it.
Never before had he felt any desire to possess a woman.
How could he face her now? How could he keep himself in check as they trained her new abilities? She had so much to learn, and nobody else to teach her.
On his bedside table, his phone came to life and started to ring.
Michael leaned across and read the caller ID. Alexander.
“Yes?” he answered.
“Just checking in. Lucille had left me a message. Has she been by the house?” Alexander said.
Michael closed his eyes. “Yes, she’s investigating the rogue vampires who attacked Anna.”
“Anna?”
“Yes, that’s her name. She’s suffering from memory loss, but she remembered that much.”
An awkward silence followed. “Look, I wanted to apologize for my reaction earlier,” Alexander started.
Michael shook his head. “It’s all right. Since I have you on the line, I might as well tell you how things went last night. You know she didn’t even believe me she’d been turned at first? It took quite a bit of convincing.”
“Interesting. You sound strange, is everything all right?” Alexander asked.
Michael took a deep breath. “Actually… I suppose I owe it to you to say it out loud. This whole business of becoming someone’s maker has turned out to be quite the headache.”
“How so?”
Michael frowned. Was Alexander genuinely asking or could he detect a hint of Schadenfreude in his voice?
“She’s… she’s a handful.”
“So were you.”
“This is different.” Michael sighed.
“Perhaps you don’t realize how difficult you were.”
Alexander wasn’t getting it, obviously. How could he? But who else was there to ask for advice?
“Actually, she isn’t strictly the problem. Not since she started believing me. But I fear I may have betrayed her trust and I don’t know how to recover from that.”
Alexander paused for a moment before responding. “What exactly do you mean betrayed her trust?”
“I kissed her.” Michael turned onto his side and covered his eyes with his free hand. Although they’d been through a lot together, Alexander and he, this was still embarrassing to admit.
“So? Did she not like it?” Alexander asked.
Michael was stunned by his reaction. “What? That’s not the point. I abused my position. I crossed the line! I’m her maker, for God’s sake!”
“Honestly, when you first came home with her I had trouble understanding your reasoning. All I could see were risks. Perhaps you didn’t just want to save her out of the goodness of your heart—perhaps something else motivated you?”
“Really; that’s what you think of me?” Michael couldn’t believe his ears. He had his flaws, like any man or vampire did. But he wasn’t that deplorable. Did Alexander really think he would go out of his way to bring home some woman to be his concubine?
“Don’t misunderstand me. I’m not judging you. I have my vices just as you have yours. Answer me this: how did it happen? The kiss, I mean.”
Michael did his best to suppress his outrage at Alexander’s earlier statement and thought back to last night. “It had been a difficult few hours until she finally believed a word I was telling her. In fact I believe what finally convinced her was when she first felt actually thirsty. Lucille and I had to restrain her or she would have hunted down a nearby human. Once we got back, she was despondent about losing control, so I took her up onto the roof.”
“Your special place. Remember how many nights you used to spend up there when you were newly turned?” Alexander reminisced.
Michael nodded. “Yes. Well, I thought it might help her gain some perspective. We sat together, admiring the view. Then it happened.”
“You like her.”
“What? Now you’re just being ridiculous! I don’t—” Michael protested.
“Think about it! How many women, vampire or human, have you taken up to the roof?”
Michael didn’t even need time to think. The answer was simple. “None.”
“Exactly. That’s the point I was trying to make. Your other reason for wanting to save her life. You felt something when you first saw her.”
So that was what Alexander had meant. It made sense for him to draw those conclusions, especially since he had found Cat to share his life with. Michael’s own thoughts had gone in an entirely different direction. “Right. Well, I still don’t think it appropriate for me, as her maker, to—”
“Will you stop? From what you’re telling me, this woman seems to know her own mind very well. If you did anything wrong, she would have reacted accordingly. She is your equal now. She could have defended herself.”
Michael shook his head. He’d seen Alexander with Lucille and Julius. They had their flaws, but they were a family, with distinct roles.
“Would you have ever kissed Lucille like that?” Michael asked.
“Why would you—no, she’s my sister!”
“Exactly my point. And Julius, would he ever have seduced Lucille?”
“Michael, this comparison does not stand. You are not Julius and Anna is not Lucille.”
“Why not? I’m her maker. She is my fledgling.”
Alexander sighed on the other end of the line. “There is a difference. The dynamic between Julius, Lucille, and me is unique to our situation. Julius made us as his children, hence he set the tone for our relationship. You’re creating a big moral dilemma where there isn’t one. If you like her, and she likes you, then what’s the problem?”
Michael shook his head again. He wasn’t ready to accept it. Even if Alexander’s perception was much more relaxed, Michael’s wasn’t. A maker was a maker, and a lover was a lover. He wouldn’t accept a crossover between the two. The more he thought about it, the bigger the knot in his chest. It was wrong. Immoral.
“My friend, stop worrying so much,” Alexander said. “The most important thing right now is for you to calm down and focus on Anna’s training. Get her to bring her impulses under control so Cat and I can come home, and worry about everything else later.”
Finally Alexander said something Michael could agree with. “Okay. I’ll do my best.”
“I know you will.”
“I’ll be in touch.” Michael sighed as he hung up the call.
Alexander was right; Anna’s training was the most important thing right now. Nobody—least of all Alexander—had ever said this was going to be easy.
Michael got out of bed and listened for any sounds elsewhere in the house. Nothing. If he hurried, he could go out and get Anna some real food. Once she was satisfied, they’d start working on desensitizing her to human activity.
Chapter Eight
Anna woke up with th
e overwhelming metallic scent of blood in her nose. It had entered her room and tickled her nostrils, dragging her against her will from the deepest slumber. She didn’t recall what she’d been dreaming of, just that the color red had entered her mind barely a moment before she’d become alert.
Now that she sat up straight in bed, she was even more aware of it. It was irresistible.
She quickly put on a robe and rushed out of her room.
The hallway was empty.
Within moments, she had found her way down the stairs all the way to the library. Inside, Lucille and Michael were already waiting.
“Are you thirsty?” Michael asked, raising one of those same antique crystal glasses from last night toward her. It was filled with the most beautiful deep red liquid Anna had ever seen.
“Is that…” She didn’t finish her sentence, just inhaled, and was instantly hit by a bout of lightheadedness.
“Blood,” Lucille said in her usual monotone voice. The woman couldn’t be more unpleasant if she tried.
Anna ignored her and headed straight for Michael, accepting the glass and gazing down into it. Her own reflection in blood red greeted her, along with swirls of black shadows which gave the impression that the glass was a lot deeper than it actually was. It was as though the liquid had sucked the light out of all of its surroundings, like a black hole, and the sight was both exciting as well as terrifying. It attracted Anna like a moth to a flame.
She had no control over it.
Without thinking about it any further, she put the glass to her lips and drank. The second the stuff hit her lips, she was in heaven. The high was intense, like she imagined certain drugs might have been. It was unlike anything she’d ever experienced.
Now oblivious to her surroundings, Anna gulped all of it down until the glass was empty. Her eyes were closed, not that she’d consciously closed them. She stood still and enjoyed the rush that passed through every part of her body. This was the pinnacle of pleasure. Better than an orgasm, better than last night’s raw steak, better than the best Belgian chocolate, better than even that absolutely wonderful expensive brandy she’d tasted the night before.
Michael's Soul Mate: A Steamy BBW Vampire Romance (Vampires of London Book 2) Page 5
