by Karin Baine
‘I don’t dispute the facts but you forgot to mention nosy and incredibly frustrating.’ He’d known her only five minutes and she’d already unearthed more about his personal life than most of his colleagues were privy to. He wasn’t in a hurry to share any more.
‘Ah, she’s got under your skin already.’ Maria nodded with a knowing Rob-baiting smile.
‘Not at all.’ She was most definitely under his skin, to the point of irritation, but he didn’t want Maria encouraging Jessica’s interest, or vice versa. The last thing he needed was another concerned female hell-bent on getting him to dig deep into his emotion bank. That sucker was closed tight, hermetically sealed, weighted down and buried at the bottom of the River Lagan.
‘I had several meetings with her in the lead-up to filming. She’s no wallflower, that’s for sure. Definitely not afraid to voice her opinion or ask difficult questions. Is that what you’re afraid of?’ Maria cocked an eyebrow at him. She knew him too well.
‘I’m not averse to a strong-minded woman, as you very well know.’ He gave her a flirty wink and hoped it was enough to end the conversation.
Instead, Maria rested her hand gently on top of Rob’s in that sympathetic way that always made him want to push her away. He’d moved to Belfast to escape the pity party, not find himself as the guest of honour at another one. ‘Don’t give up on love. The right person is out there for you somewhere.’
Every time Rob heard those words he imagined a saxophone and some electric guitar playing him his very own power ballad. All he needed was a fog machine and a mullet and he’d be the epitome of eighties angst. He’d had the right person and she was gone. Nothing could change that.
Lucky for him he was in a busy hospital ward and not the dingy bedroom of his teenage self, so there was nowhere for him to sit and wail over the girl he’d lost.
* * *
Jessica’s head was pounding and her stomach begging for something more substantial than the two headache tablets she’d consumed. She’d missed breakfast this morning and ended up skipping lunch in favour of a particularly fraught meeting with the director over content. He wanted more footage of Rob outside of his hospital role so that viewers were able to relate to him on a personal level as well as a professional one. That was akin to asking her to produce footage of the Loch Ness monster.
On top of that, she wasn’t relishing the turn today’s filming was about to take. It was going to be a tough one for all involved. She’d spoken to the family concerned to ensure they were ready to tell their daughter Lauren’s story on camera and she was aware there would be no happy ending to this tale. Unfortunately, palliative care was part of cancer and it didn’t discriminate against age. The treatment might help to make the patient more comfortable in the short-term but it wouldn’t cure the illness.
Jessica didn’t have to have children of her own to understand how incredibly distressing this would be. The professional producer in her agreed with the director that they had to include light and shade if they were going to chart the reality of the department. Her heart, however, wanted her to avoid any further reminder of cancer’s destructive nature. This was a child, a baby, who’d been denied a second chance at life. In the end, it was the family who’d made the final decision to go ahead. They were keen to highlight Lauren’s condition in the hope that a cure would be found some day. Jessica would simply have to try to remain emotionally detached from the subject. Easier said than done.
She massaged her temples as that heavy pressure seemed to bore down further inside her skull. The smell of coffee and cake hit her as she walked through the entrance hall on her way to meet the camera crew and she saw a few of the parents had set up a stall in the main foyer selling tray bakes and goodies to add to the scanner coffers. There were several tables and chairs dotted around for visitors and staff to take a timeout along with their treats.
Rob was there, talking and laughing with the mums with a box full of home-baked goodies in his hands. He really went above and beyond the call of duty for his patients and their families. The TV business wasn’t exactly a breeding ground for that kind of altruism and Jessica found it refreshing. It was a pity she’d been such a cow to him this morning by prying into his private life. He was a nice guy and it had been a long time since she’d met one of those.
She started towards the stall to offer an apology and try to make amends but her legs wobbled beneath her. A heaviness settled over her entire body and she was helpless as she felt herself falling. Rob rushing towards her was the last thing she saw before darkness claimed her.
‘Jessica?’
Lost in the swirling fog, Jessica could hear someone in the distance calling her name.
‘Jessica?’
She wasn’t ready to leave her peaceful slumber and cuddled further into the warmth surrounding her.
‘Can you open your eyes for me, sweetheart?’
Jessica frowned. ‘Go away.’
‘I will as soon as we get you back on your feet.’
‘What?’ In her fugue state she swore she could hear Rob whispering in her ear to bring her body back to life.
‘You fainted.’
Her eyes slowly fluttered open to find her dream date only a breath away. She didn’t know what she was doing in his arms but she kind of liked it. His hard chest was pressed tight against her, his large hands splayed across her back so she was cocooned in his spicy musk and muscles.
‘Can you stand on your own?’
Jessica blinked again and tried to focus. It soon became clear that their passionate embrace was more of a clumsy tango as Rob fought to keep her dropping to the floor like a sack of spuds.
‘I’m so sorry. I don’t know what happened.’ She pushed against him to free herself from his hold and the embarrassing scene she’d created. The feel of his rounded biceps under her fingertips did nothing to help her equilibrium.
‘Let’s get you into a seat.’ He lessened his grip but stayed with her until he’d deposited her into a chair at the makeshift café.
‘I’m fine,’ she insisted even though her head was still spinning. She hated showing any weakness, especially if it meant relying on a man to rescue her. Until now she’d been standing on her own two feet for some considerable time.
‘I want you to put your head between your legs and take some deep breaths.’
She only complied since he was the doctor and she was apparently having difficulty staying conscious.
Rob rubbed her back as she inhaled. ‘Do you feel dizzy?’
‘A bit.’ Another big breath in and his hand rose and fell with her.
‘When was the last time you had something to eat? I know you missed breakfast and I doubt you’ve sat still long enough for a proper lunch break, have you?’
‘Um...I had a cup of coffee this morning and some headache tablets. I’ve been busy with other things...’
‘That explains it. You can’t survive on a diet of coffee and adrenaline, you know. I understand your need to direct all of your energy into your work but it’s important to stop and refuel every now and then.’
‘Yes, Doctor.’
‘You need something to raise your blood sugar and you definitely need to give yourself a break from these.’ He crouched down in front of her and cradled her foot in his hands as the Cinderella scene played out in reverse.
Thanks to his open top button, Jessica had a nice view down the front of Rob’s shirt. The smooth swarthy skin beneath contrasting against his crisp white shirt was not the usual skin tone of a fair-skinned native. Her feverish mind began to conjure up images of her handsome prince soaking up the rays in a lot less than a tailored shirt and formal black trousers.
She didn’t do romance but she imagined it probably looked a lot like a burly doctor on his knees gently removing a girl’s stilettos. He sat back on his haunches to
face her again and reached up to brush the curls from her face. Her whole body tensed as if she was waiting for that one magical kiss that followed the princess’s rescue at the end of every fairy tale.
One of the stallholders interrupted the tender moment to hand Prince Charming a glass of water, her eyes darting between Jessica and Rob as she clearly jumped to conclusions.
He thanked her and proceeded to tangle his free hand in Jessica’s hair again.
‘What are you doing?’ She sprang back in her chair, now fully conscious and aware they weren’t alone in the busy thoroughfare. Goodness knew what people were making of this whole episode but it probably wasn’t anything which would improve her credibility here.
‘You have cream in your hair.’ Rob plucked at another strand to produce chocolatey proof that he wasn’t randomly stroking her hair.
‘Oh. Why?’ This day was getting better and better.
‘You squashed my buns,’ he said with a grin and nodded towards the spot where she’d made her dramatic entrance.
Now cordoned off with safety cones, the area resembled something of a crime scene as efficient cleaners swept away the aftermath of an apparent cake massacre. The broken remains of cupcakes and caramel squares lay in a pool of cream and sprinkles on the floor.
‘I can’t believe you sacrificed cake for me. The actions of a true hero.’ She clutched her hands to her chest in exaggerated appreciation, attempting to deflect attention away from the effect his touch had had on her. The hairs on her arms were still standing on end where he’d made physical contact. Obviously, in all the confusion her body had mistaken him for a potential mate. Her mind was having a harder time dealing with the idea when he represented everything that made her feel weak.
Sitting here, helpless and dependent on his instruction, took her back to a time when every decision about how she lived her life was taken out of her hands by doctors. Rationally, she knew it had all been in her best interests but she’d spent too long fighting for independence to relinquish it so easily now. Even to a doctor who could easily have made it as Mr June in the Hunks calendar currently hanging on her apartment wall.
‘What else is a man to do when a beautiful woman swoons at his feet?’ Rob moved to a standing position so Jessica was forced to strain her neck looking up at him. She ignored the tiny voice in her head squealing at the inadvertent compliment he’d paid her since the conversation between them had turned jovial.
Given their run-ins to date, Jessica doubted she was his type in any shape or form. Rob Campbell was destined to be part of a couple; her fate lay in a completely different direction. There was no point in even thinking there was any kind of entanglement on the cards. So she should really stop wondering if he had any hidden tan lines.
‘I hate to burst your bubble but, as you said, it was probably from lack of food rather than a reaction to your good looks.’ Jessica couldn’t believe she’d actually fainted. She supposed she was burning off more calories than usual with all this toing and froing. In future, she’d keep a few snacks to hand to fend off further embarrassment.
‘I can offer you some sweet tea and a cupcake for now but I’d advise you to eat a proper lunch as soon as you can.’ He left her and took his place in the queue to purchase her temporary cure.
He wanted the best for everyone he treated, her included. At least this mishap had softened his attitude towards her. Even if it had come at the price of her dignity. Rob was sympathetic, passionate, dedicated...everything a woman would want in a long-term partner. It was just as well Jessica didn’t want one or she would be in real danger of falling for him.
CHAPTER THREE
JESSICA NIBBLED AT the slice of chocolate fudge cake and sipped the sweet tea Rob had provided until she started to feel like herself again. The fear of falling into a sugar coma prevented her from finishing it all. Rob had no such qualms and tossed his empty paper plate and cup into the bin.
‘All better?’
‘Yes. Thank you. I should head on over to the ward. I don’t want to keep the O’Neills waiting.’ This job didn’t make allowances for illness or time off for busy producers who forgot to eat. She was responsible for everything that happened in front of, and behind, the screens. The success of the programme ultimately rested on her shoulders and she sure as hell wouldn’t let a hunger-induced dizzy spell hold her back.
The next step on the career ladder was Executive Producer, where she could lead her own production from concept to completion. She wanted the responsibility for selecting and marketing a range of TV shows including dramas and documentaries.
‘Ah, yes. They said you were doing a piece on them. I’ll walk over with you.’
‘There’s no need. I promise we’ll be respectful and sympathetic at all times.’ Her hackles rose at the assumption she couldn’t be sensitive, Jessica got up from her chair ready to march away. Only, the cold tiled floor beneath her bare feet reminded her she had to put her shoes back on before she could do that with any dignity.
‘I’m glad to hear it. However, it’s you I’m thinking about.’
Jessica’s pulse beat a little faster and sent her head spinning again as Rob fixed her under that intense gaze of his. She knew he meant that he was concerned about her fainting spell but there was something inherently sexy in hearing those words. Especially when they were delivered in a spine-tingling Scottish rumble from a handsome doctor.
‘Honestly, there’s no need.’ She was so used to fighting her own battles she’d forgotten what it was like to have someone watch her back. It probably wouldn’t do her any good to get used to the idea when she was here only for a matter of weeks.
She wedged her shoes back on her feet so she was no longer at a disadvantage standing next to him. It wasn’t as if she was some delicate creature who needed a man to make her feel safe. Not any more.
‘I don’t want to be held responsible for you swooning into the arms of another unsuspecting man.’ He moved aside to let her pass.
‘That was a one-off. Although I could be tempted to do it more often if it means I get force-fed chocolate cake every time.’ She kept quiet about the bigger perk of having him hold her close, since it completely obliterated her ice queen image.
‘That’s not a bad plan. I might use it myself. Seriously, though, you should be taking it easy.’
Jessica opened her mouth to protest but Rob held his hands up and stopped her.
‘I know, I know. That’s never going to happen. Hence the personal escort. Shall we?’
He was being so courteous that Jessica wouldn’t have been surprised if he’d offered her his arm like some nineteenth-century gent taking her courting. It left her no option but to let him accompany her.
If she was honest, as they stepped back onto the ward, she was glad to have his support for the next leg of her journey.
* * *
‘Can you tell us something about Lauren’s background? It would help the audience to understand the situation now.’ Jessica’s mouth was dry, her heart heavy as she addressed Mr and Mrs O’Neill at the bedside.
She admired their strength for wanting to share their story during what was probably the worst time of their lives. Their total devotion to their child made Jessica think of what her own parents had gone through. She’d always focused on how the cancer treatment had affected her but they must have gone through hell too. They weren’t to know their only child would make it past the hair loss and sickness into adulthood. A comfort also denied to the O’Neill family.
‘Lauren was first diagnosed with a brain tumour just after her second birthday. She had major surgery, followed by radiotherapy and chemotherapy.’ Mrs O’Neill carried on stroking her daughter’s hand whilst she was talking. Lauren was smiling up at her even though she was clearly very weak and the love they had for each other was tangible.
Despite the t
ragic circumstances, Jessica still had a pang to experience that mother/daughter bond from the other side of the equation. She knew how it felt to be loved by a parent but she could only imagine the strength of that love for a child. That was part of a relationship she would never get to experience and never fully understand.
A hush descended over the private room and Jessica sensed that they were all hesitant to go further into the details of Lauren’s illness. There had been a purposeful attempt to make the hospital room as cheerful as possible with get-well-soon cards papering the walls and brightly coloured balloons and toys stuffed into every available space. It was difficult to be the one who had to make them face the reality of what the future held.
Jessica swallowed hard before she tried to coax some more information from the family. ‘Can you tell me what happened after the initial treatment?’
The last thing she expected was to see Mr and Mrs O’Neill smiling as they were asked to cast their minds back to those days. Even Rob stopped looking so pained at the intrusion into his patient’s business.
‘They removed the tumour entirely and Lauren recovered well. We had sixteen fabulous cancer-free months catching up on all of the fun things we’d missed out on during the chemo. You loved the zoo, didn’t you, sweetheart?’ Lauren’s mum was tenderly stroking her head as she recounted the happy memories.
‘I liked the monkeys best.’ Lauren’s small croaky voice was so full of childish wonder it broke Jessica’s heart. There was so much of life she would never get to experience.
Despite her residual health problems, Jessica was reminded how incredibly lucky she was.
‘Yes, and Daddy bought you one, didn’t he?’ Mrs O’Neill reached for the long-armed pink primate hanging from the corner of the bed and handed it to her daughter. Lauren cuddled into her treasured souvenir of the day with a smile.
‘Does he have a name, Lauren?’ Jessica was almost too choked up to ask.
‘Pinky.’ The unimaginative name from the four-year-old brought some nervous laughter from the assembled group.
