Having a celebration beneath the full moon and luminescent stars was enchanting, actually. Thankfully, the Lorrigan’s had just left, Jerry giving Cassie a final glance, as her shoulders noticeably relaxed.
“Seems like the party is wrapping up,” I said. “Maybe you should get in a final dance with Dermot.”
“We’ll see,” she said, bumping my shoulder and dipping her head. “Looks like you and Callum have become friends.”
I tried to remain neutral, keeping my lips in a neat line. “Guess so.”
I’d breath a sigh of relief when it was all out in the open. I was liable to become a big fat lust starved mess in another hour.
Just then Dermot approached our table and introduced himself to me. I wanted to give them some privacy so after a couple minutes, I stood up and headed to the bar.
I fell into a conversation with a couple of uncles and then Cassie’s father approached me.
“Where did my daughter wander off to?” he asked and my head snapped toward the table we had just vacated. Shit, they were no longer there.
“She was catching up with old friends,” I said, attempting to cover up my own surprise. “Thank you for having me here, sir.”
“You’re welcome to stay as long as you like,” he said, patting my shoulder and drifting off to talk to more relatives.
I wasn’t sure he’d say that if he knew that I’d just gotten his son off in the kitchen pantry.
Callum was busy with a couple of female guests who had cornered him into a conversation. I imagined he was considered quite the catch in this town. But even I could tell that there was a vibe he personified to ward people off. Like lightning crackling just beneath the surface of his skin. You got too close, he just might strike. Or run. Either one wasn’t ideal.
Eventually, I had decided I was tired and ready for some solitude and quiet. I trudged back to the house, sank down on the steps, and looked over the Montgomery property. It truly was picturesque. I had definitely underestimated a great deal.
This was a hardworking family steeped in long-standing relationships and tradition. They had lost the matriarch early, but two other strong women had stepped up to the plate.
Right then I felt a deep pang in my stomach about my own brother, Shawn, and my less than desirable relationship with my parents.
Billie walked up the drive with Bullseye, a glimmer of a smile on his face, maybe happy with how his own night had gone. I wondered what Shawn would’ve confided in me about his own emotions and connections if he were still alive.
“Is something wrong?” Billie asked as he sat down beside me.
“Not really,” I said, bumping his knee playfully. “Just thinking.”
“About what?” he asked, as Bullseye settled in beside him.
“About my brother, Shawn,” I said, with a dejected smile. “In some ways you remind me of him.”
“I do?’ he asked, his eyebrows arching. “Did something happen to him?”
“He died of cancer a few years ago,” I said. “But I’ll always remember how sweet and brave he was. That’s how you remind me of him, because you have those qualities too.”
His face went through a series of emotions, from glum to surprise to pride. But I didn’t want to spoil the mood, so it was time to change the subject.
“Tell me about Leo,” I said. “You guys hang out a lot?”
“He’s a good friend.” He kept his eyes averted and his cheeks darkened with a wash of color. “His parents know my cousin, that’s why they were at the wedding.”
“Want to talk about it?” I said in a measured voice, not sure if I should be crossing the line. But somehow with Billie, I just knew I could reach out. We already shared a connection from hanging out the past couple of days.
He was stroking Bullseye’s coat, when he mumbled, “About what?”
“Maybe I’m wrong but…” I took a fortifying breath. “You have a crush on him.”
His eyes widened and he looked around like his dad or Grammy might come charging out at any instant.
“Don’t worry, your secret is completely safe with me,” I said in a lower voice, even though I was pretty certain nobody else was nearby. “It’s got to be hard not to have anybody to talk to about it.”
“I just…I…yeah.” He merely stared at me, at a loss for words. As if I’d just told him I’d discovered a buried treasure beneath the house or something.
“Does he feel the same way?” I asked, to assist in moving him along and hopefully to help him not feel so awkward.
He watched me through lowered lashes and nodded. I assumed as much based on the subtle looks passed between them.
“Have you guys…?” I asked.
He shook his head, biting his lip. “He holds my hand when nobody else is around.”
“Anything else?” I asked and suddenly felt terrible that he didn’t have somebody to help him navigate through all of these emotions.
“No way,” he responded immediately, which told me that this was perhaps new for the both of them and it was probably best to keep it simple. At least for now.
I placed my hand on his shoulder. “You can always talk to me. I’ll give you my number.”
“You will?” he said and his eyes looked shiny right then as if grateful for my support. “How long are you staying? I like having you around.”
“That means a lot.” My smile faltered a bit. “I planned on leaving tomorrow afternoon. Cassie will be here a couple weeks longer. But I’ve got to head back soon.”
“Can’t you stay a couple more days?” he asked in a pleading tone. “There’s a huge carnival in town and fireworks. Shady Pines has a booth there and it’s a ton of fun.”
Something warm slid across my chest. God, I adored this kid. And truth be told, I was enjoying my time on the preserve as well. Not only because of Callum, though that definitely factored in. It was more that it was a simpler kind of life where you learned to appreciate other things besides the commotion a city brings. There was a certain kind of peace to living off the land and understanding its benefit.
“I’ll see what Cassie says,” I said, figuring she and I would be having a more serious conversation sometime soon and I had no idea what she might say to me about her brother. Would the idea totally creep her out? Shit, I hadn’t thought it all the way through. I was supposed to be here as her fake boyfriend and there I was giving her brother head in a pantry.
Not that she would ever know the lurid details, but I hadn’t truly considered her feelings in all of this. What if she wasn’t cool with the idea of her brother and her roommate hooking up?
But in the end, what did it matter if I was taking off anyway? Maybe I should just hit the road first thing in the morning, and leave all of this behind. Eventually I’d get back in the hectic routine of my everyday life and be able to forget how Callum tasted and sounded and smelled.
“You’re not really Cassie’s new boyfriend, are you?” Billie’s voice rang out into the night, startling me. I had been so lost in thought.
“I…no,” I finally conceded. “Do you think anybody else knows?”
He looked around as he thought about it. “Not sure.”
“But we’re like best friends,” I said, feeling the need to explain, hoping like hell he didn’t accuse me of deceiving him. “Does that count?”
He smiled. “Works for me. Think I can come visit you sometime in the city?”
“Absolutely,” I said, not even giving it a second thought. Though I hadn’t taken Bullseye or his special needs into consideration. But he was a kid who had hopes and dreams and I’d be happy to help make it work no matter what.
“Looks like the reception is about over,” I said, nodding to a couple of guests who were wandering to their cars parked on the grass. The caterer had also loaded his truck long ago. “Think anybody would notice if I slipped off to bed?”
I went back to my room, got undressed and lay in my sheets thinking long and hard about whether or not to pack up at
sunrise. The thought of leaving made my chest ache.
Except it was only a week ago that I didn’t even give Shady Pines Preserve a second thought. Life was funny sometimes. Sneaking up on you when you least expected it and making everything feel more exhilarating and yet heavier at the same time.
23
Dean
I must’ve fallen asleep. There was a tap on my guest room door. Maybe it was Cassie telling me that she was sorry she had spent the remainder of the evening with Dermot. Hopefully nobody had questioned her about anything.
I stumbled to the door, with only the light of the moon illuminating the pathway.
After I twisted the knob there stood Callum in only a pair of sweat shorts. His chest gleamed liked he’d just finished showering.
“What time is it?” I said, rubbing my eyes.
“Late. Everybody’s asleep,” he whispered. “So were you. I’m sorry, I just thought—”
I wrapped my fingers around his wrist and yanked him inside.
As soon as the door closed, our bodies slammed together and we were kissing. My sluggish arms tried to reach around his neck but instead landed on his chest. My fingers splayed, I fondled the downy patch of fuzz there, and traced the purple mark I had left on him earlier. Callum’s hands wound through my hair and he held me in place as his lips pummeled my mouth.
He sank to his knees and tugged at my boxers. “Callum—”
I angled my head and let out a strangled groan as his large hand fastened around my dick.
“Shhh…keep your voice down,” he said, watching his fingers as they slid along my length. “All I could think about was your cock and getting my lips around it.”
My dick instantly lengthened with those words.
“Look how gorgeous you are,” he murmured, staring up at me. “Your hair, your lips, and those damn eyes. Deep as the sea, but always catching the light. Lose my breath every time you look my way.”
Holy hot damn. Before I could respond or even form another coherent thought his lips descended downward to lick around the crown.
“Fuck.” I gasped. “You make me so crazy.”
My fingers shifted from his shoulders to all of that cinnamon colored hair. It was thick and soft in my fingers and the more I tugged, the harder he sucked.
His fingers circled my balls and squeezed. My heart ricocheted against my chest as my legs began shaking. “You like that?”
“Oh God,” I grunted, my vision nearly whiting out. I loved for my sac to be played with. “Yes.”
His mouth moved lower to suck my balls into his mouth and lick circles around my sac. He shifted me toward the bed to give me someplace to anchor myself. The back of my thighs hit the mattress and I sank down.
Sliding more easily between my legs, he nuzzled my thighs before resuming his assault on my cock. He licked up and down my length before taking me inside all of that wet heat.
He relaxed his jaw and breathed through his nose, the cool air hitting my groin. I was so far down the back of his throat that I could feel it restricting around my head.
Humming, he continued sucking me, his tongue bathing the underside of my cock.
“You are the hottest thing I’ve ever seen,” he said after he moved back up to my crown, tracing the ridge with his lips. “Laid out like this for me.”
That did me in. Without warning, I gripped his hair, groaned loudly, and shot my load down his throat.
His eyes met mine while I shook and panted and he continued swallowing all of my come. It was so sexy to think that this giant of a man who seemed intimidating only a few days ago was now down on his knees in front of me.
I sank back on my elbows to catch my breath and he leaned over me to deliver a feathery kiss. I grabbed onto his shoulders and tugged him down to lie on top of me. His solid length ground against my bare hip. Our mouths melded together and I tasted myself on his tongue. I wished I could keep him here with me for the rest of the night and not worry that we were in his family’s home.
Our legs and arms were airtight, as if we were one body, one heartbeat. We licked and nipped on each other’s lips and ears and jaws. I sucked on his tongue and yanked on his hair, already hard for him again. I wanted him to fuck me straight into the mattress.
I shoved his shorts down his hips so I could feel his naked cock next to mine and he groaned as our dicks aligned. He thrust upward and rutted against me until he came all over my stomach, his mouth against my neck, capturing most of his sounds.
His lips lazily sealed around my sensitive skin and sucked. “You’ll leave a mark,” I groaned forcing his head back.
“Shit, I lost myself,” he said, licking a stripe over where he’d sucked to soothe it. “My bad.”
A noise from outside drew us out of our reverie. It might’ve been one of the wedding guests leaving the cabin. Hopefully not walking around in a drunken haze.
“I need to go,” he said, after his gaze darted out the window.
No doubt he’d check if somebody needed assistance.
I wanted to selfishly wrap him up and keep him in my warm sheets, but I knew that I couldn’t.
“I’m going to talk to Cassie in the morning,” he whispered, as his pleading eyes met mine. “Will you at least stay for one more day?”
My heart lodged in my throat, I merely nodded in silent agreement. As soon as Callum lifted his body off of mine, I immediately felt the loss of his mass and heat.
Just a couple of hours ago, I considered driving off in the morning. But now that I had more of him, I was so fucked.
24
Callum
I sought out Cassie first thing the next morning. I wasn’t sure if Dean had skipped running or not, but I was too beat after the wedding festivities, besides coming twice in one night.
Cassie was in the kitchen helping Grammy and Billie with breakfast. Billie had dark smudges beneath his eyes, but Grammy looked no worse for wear.
As I kissed her cheek, I wondered how she stayed so upbeat and strong. I honestly didn’t know how we’d manage without her.
“You feeling okay, buddy?” I asked Billie as I moved around him to the coffee pot.
“Yep,” he said, with a bleary smile on his face. “Don’t worry, I snoozed long enough.”
I knew better than to treat Billie like a fragile kid, but with his condition, it was important that he took care of himself, which included healthy eating and sleeping patterns.
“Want to take a ride to the airport with me to send off some guests?” I asked Cassie.
I couldn’t bear to see Dean and Cassie pretending around me any longer, though who knew what anybody in this family believed, after she had spent half the night talking to Dermot.
Already my brain was thinking up excuses to get Dean alone and do filthy things to him. But that would only mess with my head further. Because I liked Dean, really enjoyed being around him.
Except, he lived in another state and our lives were different as night and day. Plus, I had a family business to run. So maybe this would be like getting my fill of a very sexy man until he walked out of my life. If anything, he will have been the catalyst that got Cassie and me talking again.
“Um, sure.” Cassie’s cheeks brightened, maybe stunned to have even been asked. “Let me get some coffee in my system.”
I could see Grammy’s smile in her side view. She knew Cassie and I hadn’t spoken privately in years. Thankfully, she asked the question I wanted to know. “Where is your date?”
Cassie opened her mouth as if to say something, maybe confess to her relationship with Dean, but then she took a sip from her cup instead.
After swallowing, she said, “I’m pretty sure Dean’s out on the trail.”
“If you’re still not back when Dean returns, I’ll feed him and let him know where you’ve gone off to,” Grammy said, arranging the butter on the table.
“Thanks,” she said, and waited on me as I stuffed a fresh blueberry muffin in my mouth. “I’m ready when you are.”
/>
We headed out to the beat up passenger van that we mostly used for visitors and was probably in need of new tires. The guests who had early flights exited the cabin with shadows beneath their eyes and the ride to the airport was mostly silent after a hard night of celebrating.
After we dropped them off at their terminal we got back on the road.
Cassie broke the silence first. “Callum—”
“Wait, Cassie,” I said, raising my hand. “Please let me say something. Or I’ll chicken out again, like I have for years.”
Her eyes widened in concern so I reached over and clasped her hand in reassurance. It wasn’t the end of the world after all. It wasn’t mom dying and us clinging to each other again. It was just me being gay. Living in my own cage of shame and fear and it needed to stop.
She held onto my fingers and watched me expectantly.
“I know I’ve pulled away from you for far too long,” I said, squeezing her palm. “I should’ve told you of all people. But, I just couldn’t. I was working through it myself, and then time kept stretching out.”
“Please, you’re killing me,” she said. “Just say it, whatever it is.”
I took a deep breath. Well here goes. “I’m…gay.”
Goddamn, to say it out loud to a family member for the first time felt…my chest was so tight and then suddenly it loosened. Some of the fear had actually drained away. It was like jumping into the lake at the beginning of the season. The water stung and then it soothed, as it surrounded you and cleansed you.
And picturing that lake got me thinking about Dean’s eyes. How they were like a private spring of the warmest blue water and hurtling into them headfirst ended up saving me from myself.
I waited Cassie out as her face went through a catalogue of emotions. Shock to affection to sadness and acceptance. At least I hoped it was acceptance.
“Thanks for telling me,” she said in a croaky voice. “I understand how hard that was for you. But now a lot of things are falling into place.”
The Deepest Blue (Roadmap to Your Heart #2) Page 12
