by Kiki Leach
"Not up for it, yet." She dropped her hand inside his pants and stroked him, and a few minutes after he closed his eyes, he went stiff against her palm.
But she wouldn’t realize that it wasn’t because of what she was doing to him, or how he was feeling about it. It was because once he had erased her face from his mind, it went right back to all things Mia, and what he felt when he first saw her again that morning. It went back to her face, her hair, her tits, her long ass legs in that short ass skirt and pretty brown skin that shined like diamonds in the goddamn sun; it went back to the way her ass looked when her skirt fall back after he put her inside that car, it went back to her lush mouth and the shit that came out of it the first moment she spoke; it went back to the feeling he got when she wrapped her hands around his neck as he carried her into her house, a feeling that built up inside his chest all over again when she placed her hand on top of his heart earlier that night at the club.
The minute Courtney removed her hand from around him, his eyes flew open and he stared down at her, and his goddamn cock started going soft again.
"Fuck." He pulled her into the house and grunted as he closed the door. "You don't say another goddamn word to me for the rest of the night," he told her. "Alright?"
She slowly nodded her head, knowing all too well that she was being used, knowing that her body was being put in place of the one he really wanted beneath him that night. But she wasn't willing to pass up the opportunity to be with him again, even if it meant that aside from his dick, in no way shape or form would he be receiving any actual pleasure outside of whatever the hell he had planned to create for himself inside his own goddamn head.
River pointed toward the back of his house. Courtney looked behind herself, then took off running right into his bedroom and fell on top of the bed the minute she pushed his door open. He waited a few seconds before joining her and turned his head up toward the ceiling.
"If there is a God up there like she says," he said to himself. "This sure is one helluva fuckin' time to leave a motherfucker like me hangin' from a goddamn piece of thread in the meantime.”
He trudged back through his living room, straight down the hall and into his bedroom, and slammed the door. Neither one of them came out again until the next morning.
Chapter Thirteen
I woke up to the smell of burning bacon and fried eggs that, from what my nose was telling me, had been mixed with cheese and a heaping amount of green, white and red onions. Though the combination of it all wasn't exactly the best smell in the world, it was for certain a hell of a lot more pleasant than the one I remembered walking into the night or even the morning before.
I flipped over on my back and outstretched my arms and legs and reached out to pat the other side of the bed, expecting to feel Avery's tiny warm body curled up in a ball with the pillow tucked between her cheek and shoulder. Instead what I got beneath my fingers was the sheet that covered the mattress, and the edge of the pillow which was hanging off the side of the bed.
"Avery?" I sat up quick and looked around the room. "Avery?" I called out again. My first instinct was to panic when she didn't answer, but then I thought it was highly possible that she could've been spending time with Verna or River or Styx or any of the other members of the club.
Any other members of the club. Like Snake. Or Meathead. Or Shiver, or even worse, Tiny.
"Shit." I jumped from bed and hustled over to the corner of the room, quickly ripped off my pajamas and replaced them with a pair of fitted jeans and a white tank from the bottom of my suitcase. I slipped on a pair of black ballerina flats and after checking my face and hair in the mirror to make sure that I didn't scare anyone the minute I encountered them, least of all myself, I headed out of the room and down the hallway leading to the kitchen. "Avery?" I yelled out. Just as I was about to round another corner, I was startled by Blue poking his head around the wall and jumping out at me like a wild-haired Jack in the Box.
"BOO!" he said. I dropped back and smiled as wide and as hard as I could to hide the fact that I actually wanted to slug him in the mouth for nearly making me piss myself. He was holding a mug of what smelled like black coffee mixed with cognac and rum, and brought the rim of it up to his lips and took a long, long sip. "Mornin', sunshine." His eyes went straight down to my breasts and he leered. "Sleep well in that closet back there?"
I folded my arms over my chest to force his attention back up to my eyes, and nodded. "Yeah," I said. "It was okay compared to what I was thinking it might've been. Better than a pine box."
"Good deal, darlin', good deal." He leaned against the wall and widened his smile.
"Yeah -- Have you seen Avery running around here at all? I was hoping to keep her out of certain parts of the club while we were here. No offense."
"None taken, darlin'. None taken." He nodded behind him. "Saw her when I came in just a few minutes ago. She's in the kitchen watchin' Verna cook more food for the rest of the crew."
"Rest of the crew?"
"Yeah, the prospects and other members, their old ladies and some of the kids." He drank back more of his coffee.
"Oh. Does that mean River's going to be here this morning too?"
He peered and bobbed his head, and I realized right then and there just how eager I actually sounded in asking about his ‘VP’. "Yeah doll, he'll be here. Matter of fact, he was the one who set this whole 'breakfast thing' up. We need to discuss the Fontaine shit and he thought it might be a good idea for you and your kid to get to know some of the women we've got around here in the meantime, as well as some of their kids who are around the same age as yours. His kid'll be here too, but she's not--"
"River's daughter will be here?" I asked, suddenly feeling nervous about meeting her. I didn't even know why, but I felt that if she was anything like her father was when I first approached him yesterday, I might've been in for an even ruder awakening.
"Yeah," he replied. "He might've already told you about it, but she's on her way to college soon and he's tryin' to spend as much time with her as possible before she goes. He doesn't normally like her bein' around the club all that much but... the motherfucker's gonna be a goddamn mess without that kid around. Aside from his mother, she's the only one I know who can keep him in check when he's on the verge of losin' his shit for one reason or another about whatever the fuck happens to be goin' on around here at any given time."
"Hm."
"YO!" Slim came up behind him and dropped a hand on his shoulder.
Blue nodded up at him and lowered his mug. "'Sup, brother?"
"Prez and VP are here." He turned his eyes to me. "River's outside by his bike. Says he needs to talk to you about somethin'."
"Um, okay. I just need to check on Avery and I'll be out there in a bit."
"Sure, darlin', I'll let him know."
"Thanks."
I bypassed them and headed toward the kitchen, and what I saw when I peeked my head around the door made me both laugh and cringe until my bones hurt. Avery was covered in baking soda, sugar and dried pancake batter, head to toe covered. It was going to be hell trying to get all of that crap out of her hair, but the laughs coming from her and the look of pure happiness on her face, something of which I hadn't seen in so long I couldn't remember the last time, as she helped Verna stir the batter made the mess worth it.
When she spotted me standing in the doorway, her eyes got big and she climbed down from the chair she was standing in, which helped her to look over the counter and into the bowl.
"Hi, mama!" she screamed excitedly. "I'm helping Aunt Verna make pancakes for the bikers."
I moved into the kitchen and slipped my hands inside my pockets. "Aunt Verna?"
She moved over to Avery and placed her hands on her shoulders, and stared up at me with those huge, seaweed colored eyes as if she was apologizing for accidentally slamming the front of my car into the side of a brick wall. "It's just easier for some of the kids to remember my name by calling me that," she said. She pat Ave
ry on the back and sent her back over to the counter to continue stirring the batter. She threw a towel over her shoulder and smiled. "If you're worried about her getting too attached to it, or to me--"
"No, it's fine," I reassured her. "Actually, it's nice to have someone else around here that can get some kind of handle her. It doesn't hurt that you're also--"
"A woman?" she answered.
I grinned. "Yes. Was she already awake when you got here?"
"No, she was just waking up after I finished cleaning up the front of the club for the boys. I saw her peeking her little head out the door as I passed by your room, and since she didn't seem to want to get back in bed, I decided to let her help me out here instead so that you could finish getting some rest."
"Thank you, but you didn't have to do all of that."
"Oh, honey, she's worth spending the time with. I've been surrounded by boys and angry men and crazy ass whores for so long that it's nice when someone as sweet and innocent as her walks in." She moved in closer to me and peered. "Does she know about Ricky being her daddy?" she asked in a low voice.
I felt taken aback, but shook my head anyway and answered. "No," I said. "She asks about him... well, not about him in particular, but she asks why her dad never comes to see her. I've tried relaying every excuse in the book outside of telling her the truth, but no matter what comes out of my mouth, she's still convinced that it's just because he doesn't want to. I can't exactly tell her that the reason he hasn't been around is because he has no choice and that we're really here because he's crazy as hell and liable to snatch her from me."
Verna glanced over at her, then turned back to me. "What do you plan on doing if they actually manage to catch Ricky and dispose of him?"
I shrugged. "I don't know. Go back and live my life a little better than I did before, I guess; maybe this time without so much fear or dread that he's just lurking around some corner and waiting to come after me. I mean, he's the head of the snake, right? Once it’s gone--"
"The rest of him dies off too," she said. "Sometimes."
Well, that was reassuring as hell.
She pat the back of my hand and made a face as if she could read my mind.
I flashed her a quick smile and averted my eyes. "Do you mind watching her for a few more minutes? Slim said that River needs to see me about something outside."
"Sure, honey. Did he tell you about the other old ladies and their kids coming for this Breakfast River set up?"
"Blue mentioned something about it. Any advice on how to approach the other women?"
"Just be yourself. They're a pretty non-confrontational group of women unless you're a club whore looking to climb all over one of their men. And they already know all about you, your girl and your situation, so no need to worry about any of that."
I wiped an imaginary drop of sweat from my brow and after telling Avery, who paid me absolutely no attention whatsoever, that I would be back to give her a well needed bath later, I passed through the front of the club, where tables and chairs had been set up from one side to the other for the breakfast, and headed outside where I saw River leaning against his bike and talking to Styx and Wolf.
Between that sun kissed skin and fitted white muscle tee, which showed off not only the sculpted perfection of his arms as he folded them across his chest but the colorful array of tattoos spinning around each muscle leading up to his shoulders, and the almost impeccable curls of his hair floating amazingly in the wind, he looked like an actual bronzed statue dipped in nothing but gold and sex; the latter of which came to my mind the minute my eyes took a dip below his waist.
"Mia," he called out to me, that deep, husky voice rumbling against the back of his throat as if something simmered behind the tone he used in saying my name. He raised his hand and crooked two fingers at me, indicating that I move toward him. He looked between Wolf and Styx and nodded. They nodded at him in return and as they passed me to head back inside the club, each tossed a smile my way.
I glanced behind me to watch them enter the club, then turned back to River and raised a hand over my eyes to block out the brightness of the sun.
"How'd the hell you sleep last night, babe?" he asked, removing his sunglasses from his face.
Babe. It sounded so much more endearing this time around for some reason, so strangely intimate, as if he was saying it to someone he actually cared about and had planned to scoop up into his arms right after; and kiss, deeply kiss, with not only just his hands and face, but his entire body as well. I wasn't even sure why it seemed to come off that way, but I didn't bother to stop and ask him either.
"Um..." I shoved my hair behind my ears as he folded the arms of his glasses one over the other and tucked them inside the pocket of his jacket.
He stared up at me again and God, he made me so nervous; the minute I saw that chiseled face and those sharp, masculine features, and looked right back into those steel blue eyes that never failed to suck me in, I had to hold my entire body together to keep from falling over and into his arms.
I dropped my hands around my waist and slid them around behind me and into my back pockets. "I slept fine," I finally told him. "I guess Avery did too, despite getting up before I did."
"Yeah, Verna told me about that. Said she's been up helpin' her cook all mornin'."
"Oh, wow. We'll see how good the food comes out if that's the case." I laughed.
He chuckled. "Yeah. You ain’t never had her cookin' before?"
"Avery's?" I asked. He nodded. "Does pouring Cheerios in a bowl and dousing them in sugar and a gallon of milk count as cooking?"
"For an eight year old, yeah, I guess it can." His arms tightened around himself and as his muscles flexed, I rolled my bottom lip into my mouth and held back the urge to reach out and slide my fingers across the tiny beads of sweat forming on his skin. "My daughter used to cook all the time when she was a kid," he said. "Mostly 'cause she didn't have a choice in it. My mother worked a lot to help pay the bills once the money at the club dried up and I was always here tryin' to figure out ways to help us make a few extra bucks. Sometimes I'd come home and she'd have dinner ready and waitin' for me insteada the other goddamn way around like it shoulda been. Wasn't ever too much, sometimes hot dogs and crackers on a plate or some shit, but it was a hell of a lot more than I could ever seem to do for her."
A sorrowful look mixed with guilt suddenly filled his eyes but it seemed to only heighten the natural beauty of his entire face; maybe because it felt so terribly and agonizingly real. I thought back on Blue's words about how much River was going to miss his daughter, and realized that look was the first bit of genuine emotion I had seen from him that wasn't filled with unrighteous anger of some kind since the minute I stepped back into the club. In that moment, I wanted to steal the pain from him, lock it inside a jar and toss it into the middle of the ocean, all the while hoping like hell he’d never have to feel something like it again.
"Well, maybe before she heads off to school, she can teach Avery a thing or two," I mentioned. "Or hell, maybe me too."
"You don’t' cook?" he asked, his voice piquing.
"I'm no Martha Stewart. I mean, I can grill a steak, make a hamburger or two but not a hell of a lot more than that."
"Mm." He made a face and sat back.
I frowned. "What?"
He bent his head in disappointment and sighed. "The boys were kinda hopin' you could do more around here than just... live here with your kid."
As if we're somehow staying in the lap of luxury?
"Do more like what?"
"Cook, maybe clean somethin'."
I laughed. "You mean like some kind of maid?"
"It'd take some of the load off of Verna doin' so much of it all the time, doll. I don't mean a goddamn thing else by it other than that. Shit, if we still had the garage goin' and if I knew that you were good with the books and numbers and shit, I'd let you run that side of the business, with me keepin' a close eye out."
"You keeping
a close eye out, and just how close would that eye be on me?"
And the minute the words flew out of my mouth and I actually heard the way that I had said them to him, I realized I had stepped completely over the line of just casual talking and into the murky waters of a lake that I hadn't been familiar with in nearly a decade: casual flirting.
“They’d be close enough on you, doll,” he finally responded.
"I’m sorry, I didn't mean..." I stammered. "I just...." I brought my hand up to my face and groaned. "Never mind."
River arched a brow and pulled up the corner of his mouth into a slight grin. His eyes moved between my face and body and he swiped his tongue across his lips. I pulled my other hand from my pocket and balled my fists, and tried as best as I could to keep from thinking what it would have been like to have that tongue inside of my own mouth. Or on any part of my body, actually. Two places in particular.
He stood up from his bike, towering over me once again, and grabbed his Shadow Riders jacket from around the handle bars. He pointed toward the club and slid his hand down to the small of my back, which had quickly become his favorite place when it came to touching me. "Come on, I'll walk you back inside."
"Okay." I looked up at him as he kept his eyes straight ahead. "So speaking of your daughter, Blue mentioned that she was coming here today for this breakfast you set up?"
"Yeah, she'll be here in a few with one of her friends. Why?"
"I'm just wondering if you mentioned me to her at all."
"No. She doesn't know shit about what goes on here unless she needs to in order to keep her safe. Not to mention, I ain't been home in the last two nights to tell her much of anything...." I heard the shame in his voice. He cleared his throat. "In any case, I don't wanna freak her out about this shit with Fontaine. She’s been spooked about him ever since he tried sellin’ her that dope when she was a kid.”
"I get that," I told him. "I do, but how the hell am I supposed to approach her if she asks me who I am and why I'm here?"
